NOTE: If you may be triggered by mentions of suicide, you may want to skip this chapter. Please feel free to PM me on here or Facebook for further details or a rundown on the chapter.

Chapter 3

Of course, I didn't even have to consider my answer. I wanted, with all my heart to be Mrs Rosalie Cullen. After much discussion with both of our sets of parents and with each other we came to the decision to make the move back stateside. Edward's father was Chief of Staff at Seattle's Swedish Medical Center, which meant that there was a job for Edward… great to have friends (dads) in high places... and with my degree complete I was free to do as I pleased. I missed my home and my friends. Cambridge had been amazing and I could have seen myself living my life and working in the UK, but home was good too.

Edward and I said goodbye to everything we had known for the last five years… England had helped us grow into little adults. We returned to Washington as different people. Older and far wiser, educated and incredibly happy.

Friends and family all welcomed us back. Emmett and Bella had set up home together… They were living in the Swan house because Bella was still a full time carer for her father. Emmett helped when he could because Charlie was a very sick man and was suffering from Parkinsons. Bella was so thankful to Emmett for taking them both on. Emmett was working for the Police Department which was something we would have never expected for the football player with a major in English Literature.

Jasper and Alice were still in Canada, but promised to visit before the wedding and help with the plans. Our parents were elated that we were both home safe and sound and helped us to secure a rental property in Sammamish - A good commute into the centre of Seattle for the two of us, and just a few short hours away from my parents and Bella and Emmett back in Forks.

Believe it or not, our June wedding was small. Neither of us wanted a big fuss, much to my mother's disgust. But our day was perfect. I had a big white dress and we shared our special day with our closest friends and family. Emmett stood up for Edward as his best man and Bella and Alice were my bridesmaids. Jasper was nowhere to be seen because he and Ali were taking a break. We were very worried about him but Alice assured us that he was fine and that he just needed to sort out his priorities and think about what he wanted from her. It was very unlike him.

Other than the missing puzzle piece of our good friend, our day went just as planned. We tied the knot, ate rare roast beef and drank copious amounts of Tattinger. We spent the night making love until the sun came up. We decided not to Honeymoon because of work, but vowed to take a break later on in the year.

In September we received the sad news that Charlie Swan had passed away at home in his bed. Bella, whilst quietly relieved that her father was no longer in pain, was a broken woman. Emmett took some time away from work to be with her, but she pushed him away, stating that she needed to be on her own to go through Charlie's belongings.

We went to Forks for the funeral - it was a very solemn day. Charles Swan, former Police Chief had been a much loved member of the community. I am pretty sure that the entire population of Forks attended, as well as much of the Quileute Tribe to pay their respects and say goodbye. We all sat alongside Bella during the service. She held her head high and silently wept. I held her hand and tried to give her strength. She did remarkably. I couldn't help but wonder how it felt to have lost both her parents. Her mother wasn't dead, but she had been out of Bella's life since her mid teens. Poor Bella had tried to get in touch with her during Charlie's long illness and after his death, but Renee never bothered to answer her cell or voicemail. People suck. They really, really suck.

Bella came to stay with us for a few weeks. We had hoped that a change of scenery and a quiet house whilst Edward and I were both working would help her. Emmett, whilst sad that he couldn't help her, was pleased that she seemed interested in paying us a visit. He had to stay in Forks. Bella enjoyed her time and went home just before the Thanksgiving break. We hoped she and Emmett would be okay.

Our first Christmas as a married couple wasn't as expected. It was spent in mourning. On December 23rd, we lost our friend Jasper. The call came in at 7:30am. Alice had come home late from a night out with her colleagues and found him unresponsive in the kitchen. She called nine one one and attempted CPR but sadly it was too late, he was already gone.

It turned out that Jasper had been taking medication for anxiety and depression for five and a half years, he had also been drinking heavily. Alice hadn't told anyone. Neither of them had asked for help. Jasper had overdosed on a bunch of pills and a liter of vodka. Months later, Alice told us that he had attempted to take his own life before… that she had caught him in the act. Alice threw herself into her work after that and we didn't often hear from her.

Isn't it incredible how life can change in an instant? The decisions we make can impact the lives of so many other people. Life is far too short and far too precious to waste. It was then, that the four of us, Emmett, Edward, Bella and myself vowed to each other that we would talk often and always ensure that we were all well.

Are you all still with me?