Content notice: struggles with having a baby

Irene wasn't sure why she went to the Healers alone when Dylan had been more than willing to come with her except for the fact that she was prepared to be disappointed.

For nearly two decades, she and her husband had been trying to have a baby, and for nearly two decades, they'd been unsuccessful. At first, she hadn't thought much of it. They were both busy with work, and she knew they could have put more effort into trying than they did. After a while, though, she knew something was wrong, and considering her age, she knew she had limited time in which to discover a solution.

Healer Lubach looked at her clipboard more than she looked at Irene as she went over the results of the various tests the Healers had been put Irene through. Irene focused on her breathing to keep herself calm. The room around her was the sterile white she'd come to associate with St Mungo's since her father first fell ill decades earlier, and she'd been sitting in the room for hours. She was itching to move, even if it was just walking across the room.

"Mrs. Potter," Healer Lubach began, making Irene's heart race, "there's nothing abnormal about these tests for someone of your age. Without running tests on your husband, I can't know anything about his fertility, but I suspect your struggles are primarily because of your age. Unfortunately, as an older woman, it's naturally going to be more difficult for you to get pregnant. My suggestion for a first step is potions that would help boost your and your husband's fertility."

Irene's heart soared at the thought of a magical solution.

"But they're not a guarantee of anything," Lubach stressed, keeping her eyes trained on Irene for longer than she had at any other point since entering the room. "These potions can't make you pregnant on their own, only encourage it. If these don't work, we can look for any larger problems in your husband, but I still want to make you fully aware that you may never have a child."

"I understand," Irene said, her voice shaking despite how strong she tried to appear.

"Mrs. Potter."

The sharpness in Lubach's voice startled Irene, making her straighten her posture.

"I won't mince words with you. You're not young anymore. I feel that it would be unprofessional of me not to warn you of the potential risks if you do get pregnant. Even if the potions work, you are likely to have a difficult journey ahead."

"Fuck it," Irene said before she could stop herself. "We're going to die anyway. The possibility of it isn't going to stop me."

Irene went to Diagon Alley after her appointment, needing to release some of the energy buzzing through her veins. She understood that the potion wouldn't be a guarantee, but it was the most hope she'd had in years. She couldn't help but cling to the possibility that it would work.

Though she knew it was a terrible idea, she found herself heading for the infant section of the shop. The clerk smiled at her and asked if she needed anything. Irene wondered what the clerk thought. Perhaps she'd been mistaken for a grandmother shopping for her grandchild. She felt old enough to qualify.

Her eyes landed on a dark purple blanket, and she fell in love immediately.

It was easy to imagine wrapping her baby in the plush fabric and holding them close to her body, keeping them warm and safe. It was all she wanted in the world, and suddenly, the blanket felt like a crucial piece of the puzzle.

She kept her head down as she purchased it, as if it were a black market transaction.

When she got home, she shoved the blanket into a dark corner of the closet where things often disappeared. She refused tell even Dylan what she'd done, too aware of the embarrassment it could cause in the end.

It took several months, but on her fifth trip back to the Healers, she was told she was pregnant. She cried uncontrollably as her husband held her close.

She listened to the Healers' warnings that she was only at the beginning of a long journey. Though she took them seriously, she felt like she was flying higher than she had been in years as she enjoyed the milestones she'd dreamed of for so long.

When James was born, she cried as she wrapped him in his soft, dark purple blanket.

Prompts:

Hogwarts Challenges and Assignments

Seasonal Challenge - Autumn Colours: dark purple

Seasonal Challenge - Autumn Birthstones: blue zircon - (dialogue) "Fuck it. We're going to die anyway."

Seasonal Challenge - Autumn Flowers: heather - (theme) not being able to have a baby

Word count: 753