Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or location of Zootopia or SpongeBob, only how the story goes. The characters or the location of Zootopia belongs to Disney and the scene of the Thug Tug from the SpongeBob SquarePants Movie belongs to Nickelodeon. There are a few OC's or OP's at all in this story. I apologize for any errors in grammar and/or if I was not accurate in reference to something.

A/N: Again, expect a little weirdness in this story, for it's gonna be crazy to you. P.S. I hope that it's funny to you guys.

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Nick and Bogo at the Thug Tug

A twangy guitar theme played over the air as two animals walked along the road through Sahara Square. They were stuck walking because their police car had been taken by a polar bear. One was a fox named Nick Wilde and the other was a water buffalo named Bogo. Both of them worked for the ZPD and were on a mission to save a friend from a death sentence. They had just walked many miles through the desert terrain to make it to their destination. Both Nick and Bogo had been celebrating because they had proved two jerks wrong. But now they were beyond tired as they continued to walk. Nick then shouted, "Ah! Whoo!"

"Whoo-hoo!" Chief Bogo shouted before trying to howl, but he was too tired. They kept telling each other to keep moving on while continuing to cheer. Nick then said, "Yeah. Victory."

"Are we there yet?" Chief Bogo asks the fox, wanting to take a break from their travels. Nick didn't look up as he said, "We must be close by now." When he did, the foxes face brightened as he placed a paw in front of Chief Bogo and pointed as he said, "Patrick, look."

In front of them sat a sign that had some plants growing at the bottom and it read as Nick happily said, "We're doing great! Shell City's only five days away."

A gust of wind blew the plants away and Chief Bogo then read, "By car."

The two of them became distraught by this turn of events. Nick looked up to the sky and depressingly said, "Aww… I wish we still had our car."

Chief Bogo looked ahead of them and pointed his hoof as he excitedly said, "SpongeBob, look!"

The fox looked to where the water buffalo was pointing and saw their car as Chief Bogo said, "Our car."

The police car was sitting amongst a few other vehicles in front of a run aground boat. Both animals looked to each other with happy grins, big eyes and they said at the same time, "Ah!"

Both of them ran over to the car and looked into it. Nick then noticed with a gasp and pointed, "They key."

"Where do you think it is?" Chief Bogo asks as they both wandered where it was. A loud snap made them look back as a screaming moose was sent flying through a window. Nick and Bogo looked to the beat up animal as he groaned and twitched in pain from his injuries. They both looked worried as they looked to the old boat. They slowly raised their heads to the window as they looked inside with wide and terrified eyes. Inside the boat was a bar full of mean looking animals that were eating, fighting or other activities. As they looked about, they watched as a drunk moose fell over onto its back while sitting in a chair. Their gaze landed on a wolf with scars all over his body while about to play some pool. When he turned to face the table, that's when the two saw, "There it is, Pat. The key!"

Nick and Chief Bogo lowered themselves from the window and sat to think of their next move. Nick was really worried as he asked, "Now, how are we gonna get it?"

"I know." Chief Bogo said as he had an idea, "Walk in and ask him for it."

Nick's eyes went wide as they heard someone inside shout, "What are you looking at?!"

Someone screamed as blows were landed against them and glass shattered. Nick looked to Chief Bogo with a questioning look and said, "Patrick, that's a terrible idea."

"Sorry." Chief Bogo said as he hunched his shoulders. Nick then began to think really hard and then he said, "I know. I'll go in an create a distraction," Then he pointed to Bogo and said, "and you get the key."

"Ooh! Ooh! Wait." Chief Bogo said while making a baby face, "I wanna do the distraction."

"Uh… Okay." Nick said with a worried look. Then a smile formed on his face as he said, "I guess it really doesn't matter who does the distraction."

With a plan in motion, Chief Bogo walked through the doors. Then with a serious face he marches right in. Nick ducked under the door and carefully sneaks in after him and heads towards a hiding spot. When a more calm looking Bogo was in the middle of the room he cleared his throat and loudly said, "Can I have everybody's attention?"

This caused everyone in the bar to look at him with glares. All the animals in the bar turned to glare at him, even the moose that fell backwards somehow was able to rise on his feet like how he fell and glared at the water buffalo. All the thug animals ran over and surrounded a now stumped Bogo. Nick carefully made his way towards the wolf. Bogo, still stumped, said with wide eyes, "I have to use the bathroom."

"It's, uh…" The wolf said before pointing in the direction with his paw, "right over there."

It was then that the wolf looked down to see Nick trying to reach for the necklace. Nick had frozen in place when he was caught before pawing at the ground while saying with a nervous chuckle, "Heh! Stupid contacts." Then pretending to find it he looked to the wolf and said, "Oh there it is." Turning towards the bathroom he said, "I better go wash it off."

Then he quickly made a beeline for the restroom. Chief Bogo was currently standing at a broken urinal doing his business when Nick slammed the door open and surprised the water buffalo while scolding, "Patrick. You call that a distraction?"

"Well, I had to go to the bathroom." Bogo said as he finished his business, flushed and turned to Nick while zipping his pants. With a slight glare, Nick walked over to the sink and said, "Well, I got my hands dirty for nothing."

Then pushing on the soap dispenser it caused the top to overflow and a few bubbles popped out. Nick looked over to it and became surprised. Then while continuing to push on the dispenser and make more he said to Chief Bogo with a smile, "Patrick check it out."

"Wow!" Chief Bogo said as he pointed to the bubbles with his hoof. Both animals became excited as they raised their fists and shouted, "Hooray! Bubble Party!"

They laughed as Nick continued to make more bubbles. They started dancing in place as bubbles filled the bathroom with big goofy grins on their faces. Nick stuck his tongue in and out while making honking noises. Chief Bogo chomped his teeth while going, "Yangh, yangh, yangh!"

Nick did his again and was quickly followed by Bogo chomping his teeth again. Nick then laid on his back and held one bubble on one of his back paws while Bogo was trying to balance one between his horns. Nick held a bubble in his paws while Chief Bogo juggled some with his hooves. But unbeknownst to the two of them, a stray bubble flew out of the bathroom. The two animals were now coated in bubbles and were currently dancing again while singing to themselves. They stopped when they heard a deep voice shout, "Hey!" The two looked to each other as the guy outside questioned, "Who blew this bubble?"

Out in the main room, a polar bear with an eye patch stood before the bubble before popping it with his fist. Then he glared to the other bar patrons and reminded, "You all know the rules!"

All the thugs looked to him and said in unison, "All bubble-blowing babies will be beaten senseless by every able-bodied patron in the bar."

"Bar." One of the guys said as he was late on finishing. The polar bear pointed a claw and said, "That's right!"

In the bathroom, Nick and Chief Bogo looked to each other nervously as the bear outside questions, "So who blew it?"

Both the fox and the water buffalo then began to frantically pop all the bubbles with claw and hoof respectively to avoid any more escaping. Back outside, when none of the patron's spoke up, the grizzly said, "So… nobody knows."

"Maybe it was-" One of the thugs tried to say. But the polar bear then growled, "Shut up!"

He used a single paw to throw a chair at the thug. The thug cringed as the chair shattered against his face. The polar bear then said, "Somebody in here ain't a real man." Nick and Chief Bogo were trying to sneak out the front door when the polar bear turned to them and said, "You!"

Both the fox and the water buffalo started to shake as they turned to him. The bear then informed, "We're on a baby hunt." A sadistic grin crossed his lips as he leaned close and said, "And don't think we don't know how to weed 'em out.

"Now, everybody line up!" The polar bear roared and turned to his left. Nick, Bogo and everyone moved into a line in front of the polar bear. The thug glanced back and shouted, "DJ. Time for the test."

The DJ, a small Finick fox, silently gave the grizzly a thumbs up and picked up a record with its small paws. Then placing it in a record player, he put the needle on it to play. A childish tune began to play as the polar bear knew with a grin, "No baby can resist singing along to this."

Both Nick and Bogo's eyes widened and their bodies tensed as they recognized the tune. Bogo leaned to Nick and placed a paw over his mouth as he said, "SpongeBob, it's the "Goofy Goober Theme Song"."

"I know." Nick said as he turned to his friend and started to sweat. The test began as the speaker's sang…

Singer: Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah

You're a Goofy Goober, yeah

The song continued to play as the polar bear flipped his eye patch up to reveal a working eye as he walked in front of the line. He stopped before a grizzly bear and looked at him with an intense stare, making his fellow bear tense up and look tough. Then the polar bear thug continued walking and came upon a lion. The lion gave a small cough and a surprised polar bear pointed to the feline and accused, "It was you! You're the baby!"

"No! No!" The goose said while shaking his head and holding his hands up defensively, "I only coughed, I swear."

The grizzly then made the I'm-watching-you signal with two claws. Then turning to the Finick Fox he shouted, "DJ, turn it up louder!"

Then he continued to walk down the line. When he was gone the lion gave a relived sigh. The little fox twisted the dial and the song became louder.

Singer: You're a Goofy Goober…

Nick and Bogo were having the hardest time keeping it together as their bodies were tense and sweat ran down their heads. Nick strained to keep it in as he told Bogo, "Don't sing along, Patrick."

"G-I'm trying." Bogo told him. But he didn't know for how much longer as he said, "Trying so hard."

The polar bear walked up to the two and noticed that they were on the verge of busting out with song. Then trying to egg it on he leaned closer and sarcastically sang…

Polar Bear Thug: I'm a Goofy Goober,

He leaned closer to a tearful Nick as he said, "yeah!"

Nick's face twisted up as he fought against singing while the thug sang…

Polar Bear Thug: You're a Goofy Goober Yeah

Chief Bogo was starting to melt from the pressure. The thug had a grin as he thought he had them…

Polar Bear Thug: We're all Goofy Goobers Yeah

He glared at them as they hadn't been broken yet. But his smile returned as they both took in deep breaths. All three became shocked when two other voices shouted and the record needle scratched, "Goofy-goofy, goober-goobers. Yeah!"

They looked down to the end of the line to see two wolf brothers that were conjoined down the middle. Everyone else in the bar looked to the duo with glares while Nick and Bogo looked a little relieved. The polar bear thug chuckled while saying, "Well, well, well."

He flipped his eye patch back down and walked over to the duo. The two wolves were shaking in fear as he came closer. Then pointing at them with a claw he then questions, "Which one of you babies was it?"

"It was him." They both said, pointing a claw at the other two. They looked to each other with an, "Uh…" Then they pointed at each other again as they said, "He did it."

Then they both said in unison, "I've never even eaten at-" The polar bear thug became wide-eyed as they both started to sing, "Goofy-goofy, goober-goobers Yeah!"

They both clamped a paw on their brother's muzzles as they had been found out. All the other thugs started to surround the two while they chuckled as the polar bear said, "Well… looks like we got ourselves a double baby."

All the tougher animals then cracked their knuckles and hooves as they knew they were gonna have some fun. Then all the thugs leapt at each other and the place turned into one huge brawl. Nick and Chief Bogo looked to each other before quickly making for the exit.

They crawled out from underneath the door and moved a few feet away. Nick looked back to inside of the tug and commented, "Man, that was a close call."

"Guess what I got." Chief Bogo said as he reached behind his back. The car key was in his hooves and Nick excitedly said, "The key!"

Then they both noticed that they were a little loud, Nick took it from Bogo and placed a claw before his lips and said, "Shh."

Nick and Chief Bogo quickly ran to the police car and the former jumped into the driver's seat and Bogo sat next to him. Placing the key in its slot, he turned it and the car revved up. Putting the pedal to the metal, both of them sped down the Sahara Square.

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Author's Note: This was certainly fun to write, and I do have a lot more planned. I was inspired to do this from a video on YouTube. I look forward to reading your reviews. Be sure to leave a comment either about if I've done something wrong or if you want something specifically to happen. See you next time.