BABYSITTING
"I don't understand why Keith gets to ride shot gun. I CALLED IT!" Lance whined for the 30th time since departing the Castle of Lions. He sat in the cargo hold of the small Altean pod with both his arms and legs crossed, and a rather childish pout on his face. He'd scowled heartily at the doors when Keith shut them, segregating the three Humans in the cargo hold from the Galra and Altean in the cockpit. Normally this would have meant the young Blade didn't have to listen to them, however Altean pods had the inconvenient ability to allow the cargo hold to message the cockpit. Thus allowing Lance to whine unendingly over the coms.
It had been explained to them all that Keith needed to be in the cockpit to provide his Operative ID and the coordinates of the base they were headed to. Without him, there was no way their little pod would be allowed to dock. Keith glanced to the side and watched the vein on Coran's forehead as it pulsed in annoyance. He tried his best to suppress the snicker but earned himself an unimpressed side-eye glare from the Altean. They were still another varga away from the Blade base and he rolled his eyes as Hunk's voice explained everything to Lance yet again. The com line still connected. "Lance, buddy, you know the rules. You calling shotgun from the bridge doesn't count!"
"Since when?"
"Uh, since forever! You have to be in the pod bay to call it. That's shotgun etiquette!"
"Will you two knock it off?" Pidge interjected just as Lance was about to retort. They were met with a defiant huff and an ensuing silence as the coms were disconnected.
Thank the Ancients! He thought to himself with a sigh and relaxed into his seat slightly. It was nearly 20 dobashes before Lance complained over the coms again.
Transit Base Kassatae was approximately the same size as Communications Base Thaldycon, but with a much higher volume of residents at any given time. Both bases were capable of supporting 2,000 occupants, however Thaldycon only ever reached a max of 10, while Kassatae was rarely fewer than 300. This meant that Thaldycon felt large and mostly empty, and Kassatae was constantly buzzing with activity. It reminded him of their Head Quarters.
As a transit base, Kassatae had a much larger docking station with 55 hangars in total; more than triple the amount on bases of a similar size. The cafeteria was larger; there were more lounge areas, more sleeping quarters, more washing facilities, more training decks, and one very special holding room.
To prevent the small transit bases from running out of space on their resting walls, each was equipped with a special holding room that contained crates filled with the soft purple sand of Daibazaal. This room is where Keith found himself as he waited for their pod to be ready. He opened one of the unsealed crates and added the four blades he'd been given back on Olkarion. Placing them gently into the sand (blade buried to the hilt vertically) he took a small handful and rubbed it into the sigil on the handle of each blade with his thumb, returning the lid of the crate when he had finished. Once the crates were full, they would be sealed and taken to Headquarters where Kolivan would set each blade into one of the many, many resting walls on base. There were crates destined for specific bases, and crates destined for the Main base. Any Operative whose home base was unknown would have their blade sent to Kolivan. Therefore, of the 50 or so crates in the holding room, approximately 30 of them were headed for Headquarters.
When he finished placing the blades, Keith exited into the hall. His red and white paladin armour marked his as 'other' to the Operatives of the base and most shot him dirty looks when they saw where he had come from. Keith mostly ignored them. But it was a new sensation, one he wasn't fond of in the least. He'd traveled to other bases before when he was on missions, and he'd even had to stay at a transit base for a few quintants while waiting for his pod to be repaired. But each time he had been in his Blade suit and his presence was never questioned, just another Halfling member of the Blade of Marmora. Now, in his Paladin armour, he was being met with skepticism and apprehension. He didn't like it one bit.
"KEITH" Came a familiar, but annoying voice as he walked into the cafeteria. "Dude, you've gotta check this out. They have so much food, like actual real food!" Lance was practically bouncing where he stood, the plate in his hands wobbling dangerously.
Keith smirked at him and rolled his eyes. Thaldycon had been mostly rations, with prepared dinners that the entire crew gathered for. But Kassatae had a much larger population and thus offered a constant buffet for occupants to eat as their schedules dictated. With pods and ships docking at all vargas, it was necessary to always have an assortment of food prepared. "Duh, it's a cafeteria what did you expect?" He sarcastically jabbed back and the Blue Paladin merely shrugged in return.
"Purple food goo I guess." He responded and turned towards the table where Coran, Hunk, and Pidge were eating their platefuls. Keith chuckled to himself as he walked over to the buffet line and grabbed some of his favourite dishes. It had been far too long since he'd had a good srava shake and any actual meat!
"Do you think they're all Altean?" A nearby Blade whispered to her companion, receiving a "Well the old one clearly is, and the others are wearing Altean armour – so maybe?" in response. Keith snickered and turned to see the Paladins removing their helmets. For the first time he examined them all, really examined them. The similarities between Humans and Alteans were incredible. They really did look nearly indistinguishable aside from the ears and facial markings. In fact, with his slightly pointed ears he wouldn't be surprised if he were mistaken for Altean more than Human. Which was not ideal; he scowled into his meal as he walked over to the Paladins.
Keith took the spot beside Lance with Hunk on the Cuban boy's other side, and Pidge and Coran across from them. Scanning their trays he gasped in horror when he noticed Hunk had retained absolutely zero of his warnings from their time on the Thaldycon base. "HUNK!" He yelled. "What the quiznak! You CAN'T eat diffry berry pie. I already told you that."
"But it looks so good!" The larger boy nearly wept, his shoulders slumping in despair. "What if it's fine, what if it's just you and Iverson that can't eat it?" He tried to argue but Keith reached across the table to yoinked the dessert from his plate. There were some snickers from the table beside them, some confused stares from those standing nearby, and a whole lot of moaning and groaning from Hunk. In the end Keith won, and the pie found it's way into the waste bins.
"At least tell me what it tastes like." Hunk muttered into his soup and the young Galra had to pause for a minute to think of an Earth equivalent. Something sweet but tangy with a slightly sour after taste, nothing he had tried seemed to match the flavour so he shrugged and took another bite of his meal.
The three Cadets talked amongst themselves while they ate, Lance flinging his spoon around wildly as he gesticulated. After a dangerously close encounter with a particularly large glob of sauce, Coran finally had enough and chastised their Blue Paladin. With their helmets off, none of them understood a word the Altean said and Keith snickered at the confused stares he was now receiving.
"So, that's what Altean sounds like?" Lance commented with a far off expression. "It's oddly - "
"Alien?" Pidge deadpanned and Keith snorted.
"Paladins, your pod is ready for departure." A young Operative announced as she came to stand beside their table. She wore her sheathed blade on her lower back as he did, and stood at approximately the same height as Pidge, meaning she was most likely a Halfling like him. But it was hard to tell with her mask activated.
Keith gave a curt nod. "Appreciated. We'll head out momentarily." She nodded in return and swiftly walked away.
"Right then," Coran responded in horribly out-dated Galran "Shall we?" Keith smiled and resisted the urge to snicker at his pronunciation.
The reaction from the Paladins upon seeing the mall for the first time was nothing compared to the reaction he got from Coran. Unlike Altean pods, there was only space for a pilot in the cockpit of Galran pods. Like everything built by the Galra, both Blades and Empire alike, this re purposed Empire craft was genetically encoded to his species and only Keith could fly it. In other words, Lance calling shotgun again meant absolutely nothing and he was left pouting like he'd never pouted before in the cargo hold when they came up to the SpaceMall's massive hangar.
The trouble now was, since the mall technically fell into Empire territory, they had to wear their civilian clothes instead of their Paladin armour. This meant, aside from Keith, none of the Paladins would be able to communicate outside of their little squad. Coran had delegated them to stay as a group while he went off on his own. Both parties were to keep a close eye for scaultrite lens-stones and a whole list of other parts Coran needed for various repairs.
Hunk was insisting on going to food vendors to find actual spices and seasonings he could use in the Castle's kitchens. Lance wanted to ride the massive escalator from the ground floor up to the sky ridge, a total of 10 levels high with a large open-air gap in the middle. And Pidge had to pee.
Keith groaned as Coran waived heartily back to them and disappeared around a corner. Each of the cadets was now trying to head off in a different direction and Keith really, really hadn't signed up to play babysitter. He had some GAC that he'd withdrawn on the Kassatae base from his personal accounts, and he had some random junk he could trade, but their funds were limited.
"Okay." He said decisively, pulling their attention back to him. "Either you all stick with me, or I buy you translators and you owe me a favour to be collected at a later date."
"Nope, nuh-uh, not gunna happen. I'm not agreeing to some random favour 'to be collected at a later date'." Lance pulled out the air quotes and a mockingly high-pitched, whiny voice. Keith scowled at him.
"Yeah, I'm with Lance!" Hunk quickly agreed. "No offense man, but I don't trust you not to screw with us."
"Fair." He dismissed, shrugging his shoulders and crossing his arms. Lance looked victorious and Hunk looked relieved, but Pidge was starting to do the potty dance and their eyes were frantically darting around the vicinity. "Okay, first – bathroom for Pidge. Then we should grab lunch, then I have somewhere special I want to take you guys."
"Well that's cryptic, but you had me at bathroom!" Pidge eagerly responded and Keith chuckled as he led the group to the left, down two levels on a small escalator, and through the halls to the nearest bathroom. Pidge promptly scowled at the doors and groaned as they whipped around to glare at him. "Okay alien boy, which one?" They commanded.
"Left."
"Does it really matter?" Lance asked. "It's not like anyone has ever met a Human before. For all they know Pidge is a guy."
Keith rolled his eyes, if only it were that simple. "They aren't gender specific, Lance. The right bathroom is for those with tentacles or who require a 'wet' facility. The left bathroom is for those who are bipedal and require a seat and a 'dry' facility. Don't ask questions – just use the one on the left."
Pidge took off at a run into the left entrance, Hunk blushed a shockingly bright shade of crimson, and Lance muttered under his breath about wanting to find out what a 'wet' facility was. Keith just rolled his eyes again and leaned against the wall as he waited for them to come back out. It took a solid 5 dobashes before the gang was back together and they were ready to move on.
"So, lunch?" Hunk asked, out pacing Lance and Pidge to walk beside Keith. He nodded in return and led the group down the labyrinth of hallways.
The mall's food court was massive. The large round area was mostly metal painted in a soft cream colour, with large circular booths scattered throughout the space. Four giant pillars held up the transparent ceiling, allowing diners to gaze at the stars while they ate. Surrounding the seating area were a variety of food booths lining the walls. Each offered food from a different culture, some more authentic and others more mass marketed. There was a booth straight ahead that served nutrient rich broths, another near the far left that served only cold purée, and a few that served some variation of wraps. If Earth had a restaurant here it could serve burritos and fit comfortably with the latter, or pancakes with pancake sauce and coffee, or sushi, or best of all – pizza! Okay, he was maybe hungrier than he thought.
Shining bright like a beacon of light amongst all the crap was Vrepit Sal's, the only spot in the entire food court that served authentic Galran dishes. He was salivating already.
"Okay, we all have to go to the same spot so I can order for you. What does everyone want?" He asked, turning around to address his cohorts. "Wait, where's Hunk? Damnit, Lance! Why weren't you watching him?"
"What? Me? Why am I in trouble?"
"Cause he's your best friend! Around tech stuff we watch Pidge, around anything remotely breakable we watch you, and around food WE WATCH HUNK!" He seethed back. Honestly, he hated babysitting!
"We'll just go find him. HUNK? HU-" Keith immediately slammed his hand over Lance's mouth, muffling the last bit of yelling. Keeping his hand firmly in place, he glared at the moron.
"Shut up, Lance!" He urged through tightly clenched teeth. "You'll draw attention to us. Stars, you're about as bright as a yupper!"
"wassayupper?" came from behind his hand and Keith narrowed his brows in confusion, having understood absolutely none of that. A quick, and very slobbery lick to the palm had him jolting his hand back to his side and frantically rubbing the now tainted appendage against his leg.
"Ugh, gross Lance. What are you 5?" He scolded and the 'small child' stuck out his tongue. "Mature." He shot back, unable to let it slide. "We need to find Hunk, he doesn't have a translator or any GAC."
The threesome split up, Lance and Pidge going one way and Keith going the other. The nice thing about Hunk was they were pretty much guaranteed he'd stay in the food court, which helped limit their search area substantially. Pidge had set them a failsafe so they didn't lose the rest of their gang. The two groups would go from opposite ends and meet back up in the centre of the seating area in exactly 30 dobashes. First one to find Hunk was to drag his butt back to the meeting area and wait for the other(s).
Time was nearly up and Keith checked over his shoulder to glance at their meeting point and find it still empty. Sighing he continued his search. He practiced under his breath what he was going to say when they got back to the Castle. "Sorry Shiro, I don't know how to tell you this, but we lost Hunk!" Hmm, that was no good. "Sorry Shiro, I don't know how to tell you this, but Lance lost Hunk!" better. He continued like this as he wondered, most likely coming off as insane to the other shoppers, until something wonderful fluttered across his path. The smell was magnificent, rich and hearty with a hint of spice to it. The unmistakable scent of properly seasoned meat was mouth watering and Keith abandoned his mission to follow his stomach. Maybe channelling his inner Hunk would help lead him to the guy.
"Welcome to Vrepit Sal's, what sustenance option will you be choosing today?" The older Galra spoke in half-hearted common and Keith felt his face fall slightly. He'd heard that Vrepit Sal's had gone downhill ever since Sal Sr. passed away, but to actually hear the lack of enthusiasm in Sal Jr.'s voice was disheartening.
Keith stared up at the menu, trying to decide and eventually landed on a meat-pie and some gymmin juice, which he promptly ordered in Galran. Sal blinked at him in shock for a few tics before narrowing his eyes and leaning across the counter to stare him down. "Hey, wait a tic," the man said, mimicking Keith and switching to Galran himself. "I recognize you. You're that little rugrat half-breed who ran away from his mommy!" Keith blushed but nodded. "You still don't look very Galra."
Keith hissed at him, baring his sharp teeth and narrowing his yellow eyes. "I look Galra enough!" He spat back and Sal's eyes flew wide before he burst out laughing.
"If you say so kit. I got me a new chef who doesn't speak any common so food is slow, I'll call you up when it's ready." Keith nodded back to him and paid for his meal before turning to meet up with the others. He'd ordered enough for all four of them in the hopes that Lance and Pidge managed to find their missing Yellow Paladin.
When he got to the meeting place he found the others already waiting. "Any luck?" Lance asked and Pidge promptly smacked the other's arm.
"Yeah Doofus, that's why Hunk is standing right beside him." They sassed with an eye roll and Keith snickered, offering a high five and a 'nice' to the gremlin who accepted both with a smirk. Lance scowled. "Aww, you look like twins!"
"HEY!" The Red and Blue Paladins replied in unison, causing Pidge to burst out laughing with a condescending 'twins' forced out between gasps. Keith narrowed his eyes at them and huffed as his arms flew up to their usual spot across his chest. Lance slumped back further into the booth and continued to scowl.
"Whatever." Keith dismissed, redirecting the conversation. "I ordered some lunch for us, should be ready soon."
They sat in an awkward silence looking around the busy food court, and trying desperately to spot the large yellow, green, and brown colour pallet of their missing friend. Eventually Keith got up, muttering about checking on their lunch, and walked over to Sal's booth. The line up that had formed was unreal. When he'd walked up earlier there hadn't been a soul in sight, but now Sal's was lined up down the isle; blocking access to the other booths in the process.
He maneuvered his way through the crowd, weaving in and out of the line as he made his way closer to the front. Some patrons scowled at him, others actually shouted that he needed to get to the back of the line, but Keith ignored them all. One man reached out and grabbed his arm, but the young Blade flipped him over his shoulder and stepped on his chest as he walked over him. Another grabbed his hair and yanked him back only for Keith to spin around and growl at him, making sure to bare his teeth in the process. His yellow sclera with slit purple irises and sharp teeth was enough to let patrons know he was Galra and they mostly backed off after that.
There were still a few slurs tossed his way, a 'half-breed' here and a 'mutt' there, but nothing he wasn't used to. Keith let it wash over him as he approached the front of the line and called out to Sal in Galran. When the large pink blob-like person stepped aside, he got his first unobstructed view inside Sal's kitchen and nearly fell over from shock. Actually, why he was shocked in the first place was a mystery because of quiznaking course Hunk would find himself chained to a broken down robot in a greasy kitchen the moment he goes missing. He probably ate something and realized too late he didn't have any GAC. Keith groaned.
Stepping in front of the next patron, and earning himself a very verbal objection, he immediately scolded the Yellow Paladin, switching back to English in an effort to be understood by the Human. "HUNK! What the quiznak are you doing? Get out of there, come on."
"Keith, my man! Oh buddy, am I glad to see you. You gotta help me, man! I thought they were free samples but they weren't and I ate one and Mr. Sal here chained me up then his robot died and now I'm the cook and the lady back here, um at least I think it's a lady, I mean she does have a beard, or they have a beard? No wait, she said she's been here since she was a little girl so that makes her a lady so yeah, the lady back here has been chained up for like, ever and I don't wanna die here man!" He panicked in one long breath and took a gasp of new air as he finished. Keith blinked at him, stunned by the onslaught of words.
"Uh, okay." Was all he managed to get out before Sal was handing over his plate of food and ordering him out of the queue. "Okay, okay! I'm leaving!" He replied to the man in his native Galran before switching to English once again to address Hunk. "I'll be back to get you. Just hang tight." The boy nodded and continued with his work, putting together plate after plate of food for hungry people waiting.
Keith plopped the tray down in the meeting place and announced that he'd found Hunk as the three of them dove into the most incredible meal he'd ever had. If this is what Hunk could do with real seasonings and fresh ingredients, he couldn't wait to get more of it on the Castle. They really needed to get Hunk those spices.
After their meal was finished Keith ordered Lance to clear away the tray then run surveillance to let him know if security was coming, all while he and Pidge went back for Hunk. Keith explained the plan to Sal in his native Galran. Pidge would fix his robot and Hunk would hand over the instructions for his dish. In exchange, Sal was to release Hunk. The man looked hesitant to comply and Keith narrowed his eyes dangerously, letting out a low rumbling growl in warning. Sal's eyes widened in a flash as he took in the hostile form the young Blade was assuming. He debated for a moment, hesitating just long enough for Keith's to flex his claws as a last warning, before finally agreeing to comply.
Pidge looked up at him nervously as Keith gave the order for them to repair the damaged robot. Watching Galra interact wasn't exactly something the Paladins were used to. The two Humans muttered between themselves about how scary it had been, how they didn't know Keith had that in him, and how they thought Sal was going to fight him. The Red Paladin merely rolled his eyes, once they proved the robot could do what they promised, Sal would lighten up. And he did. Keith had been right, again. The robot took Hunk's place in the kitchen and the latter was released from his cuffs. He'd moved to free the old woman by the dishes, but Keith swatted at his hand, pulling him back by the collar before Sal could lose his cool.
"She wasn't part of the deal."
"What? Keith, man, we can't just leave her here!" Hunk gaped back at him.
"We have to. Unless you want to deal with security, we need to leave now. Sal is being generous by letting you go in the first place. Hustle!" He barked back, and as they left, he turned back to Sal. "Thank you for cooperating." Slamming his fist above his chest he repeated the Empire salute Sal had given him. "Vrepit Sa."
"HUNK! Buddy! You're okay! Oh I was so worried when Keith lost you!"
"WHAT?" he shrieked back at Lance who had thrown himself over their large friend. "I didn't lose him, he wandered off." But Lance wasn't listening; instead Keith rolled his eyes. "Come on idiots. I wanted to show you something and we still have that list from Coran." The gang groaned as they followed him down the halls.
They made a few stops along the way, finding shops that carried some of the parts on their list, and eventually making it to their destination: Terra.
It was just as Keith remembered. Dusty cassette tapes sat in boxes on the lower shelves, a display of palm trees standing in front of a setting sun adorned the back wall, and case after case of comic books stood off to their right. In the middle of it all was a greenish-grey man with large round eyes and only three fingers. He was dressed in horribly tacky Earth clothes, complete with giant shoulder pads and bulky gold chains, while blasting rap music over the shops speakers. The lyrics were quite profane, he was lucky no one in the universe understood English.
"Woah, look at this cool Earth stuff!" Lance exclaimed, rushing into the store with an eager Hunk hot on his heels. Keith grinned in victory as he watched their faces light up with glee. "Oh man, check this out! We gotta get it! OH – and this! AND THIS!" Lance rushed around, filling Hunk's arms with things Keith was sure he didn't have enough GAC left to afford.
"Guys, come on. We've got to be back at the ticking clock in 2 hours." Pidge piped up, ruining everyone's good time with their logic. "We're supposed to be looking for the teludav lenses and you guys are in the one store we know for certain won't have – OMGOSH! Is that Killbot Phantasm 1? The first Journey to the depths of the demon sphere?" They gushed, practically drooling all over the video game's case. "OH! Mercury Gameflux 2! With the original power glove that gives you infinite lives if you touch the index finger to the pinky! We HAVE to have this!" They were clutching the console tightly to their chest. In the blink of an eye the Green Paladin was standing between Keith and the shopkeeper, whipping their small head back and forth as they excitedly asked how much everything would cost.
"1,200 GAC." Was the answer given in Common and Keith nearly dropped his jaw. That would translate to approximately $50(ish) US dollars for an entire gaming console, two pairs of controllers, and a game - what a steal. Except, he only had 3,000 GAC left on him and they still needed to get spices and a few more parts, plus the lens-stones.
"We don't have enough Pidge. You said it yourself, we're supposed to be finishing that list for Coran." he explained. Translating the amount they needed and watching the wheels turn behind the Gremlin's eyes.
"We're gunna find some money. Come on!" They hollered, grabbing hold of Lance's wrist and dragging the Cuban from the store. Keith yelled after them but it was no use, neither of them was listening.
A varga went by and he realized how much he'd actually missed the big guy's company. Together, he and Hunk had purchased an assortment of spices from various planets, including some traditionally Altean and Galran blends. Hunk had opened up each and every one of the containers, smelling them all and comparing them to different seasonings back on Earth. There was one he had dubbed 'Space Galric' and he'd picked up an absolutely massive case of it as well as one that he said reminded him of chili flakes. They'd stopped at another booth that sold an array of tuberous vegetables, one that sold leafy vegetables, and one that sold fresh cut meats. That one was Keith's favourite. He'd ordered all the meat and gave their docking number to have the produce delivered and loaded into their pod while they continued to shop. He managed to snag a small steak off the top and was excitedly munching on it while Hunk tried not to puke.
"Seriously, man, so gross." He'd complained at least three times already, but Keith didn't care. So he kept right on ripping bites off the fresh meat and happily smiling to himself as he enjoyed his snack.
"Humans always over cook meat." He mused as they walked, coming to an abrupt halt to avoid being run over by the mall cop. The out of shape Galra was speeding off in the direction of the large fountain; most likely some kit had fallen in again or something. Keith shrugged and took another bite of his meat, being sure to lick the side of his hand and catch the trail of blood that was running down it. Hunk gagged.
"We should stop at the bathroom one more time before we leave. So Pidge can empty their tiny bladder and you can wash your hands."
He actually laughed, letting his head fall back slightly as he did so. "Do you want a bite, buddy?" he teased, thrusting the raw meat in the other's direction and watched Hunk's face pale.
The two laughed some more, wandering in and out of shops as they managed to find a few last dobash items on the list. All in all there were only three things they didn't get: scaultrite lens-stones for the teludav, scaulicon (a composite mineral made from scaultrite and silicon) chips for the processor in the gladiator droid, and tape.
Hunk and Keith made their way back to the ticking clock at the main entrance and he kinda wished they'd had a chance to stop at 'The Slice Capades'. He'd packed up his throwing knives back when he was being assigned to Earth almost 3 deca-phoebs ago. When they visited the Thaldycon base he'd checked for them but Commander Tragok confirmed they'd been sent back to Headquarters with Zavin. He really wanted a new set. Shame.
Before he could even finish mentally pouting, loud voices shouting in English pulled his attention. Lance and Pidge were riding a quiznaking cow on a hover-pad through the halls with the security guard from earlier hot on their trail. He'd facepalm but there was no time! Within tics, the bovine riders were whizzing past them.
"GET ON MY KALTENECKER!" Lance hollered, reaching his hand out for Keith to grab. Instead, Keith pushed Hunk closer to grab the assistance while he deftly leapt into the air and twisted his body to land on the back of the cow.
"Did you buy a cow?" Hunk asked, settling in between the Green and Blue Paladins, while Keith took up the rear.
"It was free with purchase!" Pidge justified and they sailed over the railing, dangerously gliding the hover-pad down to the lower levels of the mall. They weren't going very fast he noted, but then again neither was their pursuer; the security hover-bike maxing out at about the same speed as their flying cow. Stars what a weird thing to say. That was one sentence Keith honestly never thought he'd ever think. Granted, it wasn't really the cow that was flying, but still.
"There he is!" Pidge called out, pointing to where Coran was walking out of a shady looking shop.
"We gotta go, Coran!" Keith yelled in terrible Altean.
"I got the scaultrite lens-stones!" He replied as Hunk leaned over to help pull him onto the hover-pad.
"Good cause we didn't. But we managed to get most of the other stuff."
"Guys, can we talk in alien languages later? Right now we've got to get out of here!" Lance cut in and Keith immediately translated for Coran. Kaltenecker took a sharp turn and they nearly lost Hunk. But another sharp turn in the opposite direction let him regain his purchase, and they all managed to make it to the hangar in one piece.
The mall cop wasn't far behind and they needed to get loaded into the pod and cleared for departure before he caught up or they would be locked down. Thankfully, luck was on their side and Keith launched the pod out of the docking station, clearing the gates just as the hover-bike came into view. When there was no further pursuit, he finally breathed out a sigh of relief.
Two vargas later they arrived back at the Kassatae base. "Keith Kogane, Operative 2675 – Red Paladin of Voltron, requesting permission to dock pod 1A-8."
"Permission granted." came over the intercom and he docked their pod in the hangar. Keith, Hunk, and Lance moved all the supplies from the re purposed Empire pod into the Altean pod and Pidge tried to figure out what to do with the cow.
It ended up in the cargo hold with the rest of them. The very small, and now smelly, cargo hold that was 100% not designed to accommodate 3 people and a large farm animal.
"Kaltenecker is the only cow in outer space! She's one of a kind." Lance argued over the com. Keith could hear the smugness in his voice as it came from beside Coran in the cockpit. He rolled his eyes and hissed at the cow when her tail swatted him in the face. Why was he at the ass end while Hunk and Pidge sat up by her head?
"And Keith is the only Human / Galra hybrid so that makes you both like, rare!"
"Rare? I'm not a quiznaking Pokémon, Hunk." He shot back, not impressed with being lumped into the same category as livestock.
"Oh, so you've never seen The Exorcist but you know what Pokémon is? I don't get you, Mullet!" Lance replied, preparing to launch into some sort of rant. Aaaaand that's enough of that. Keith thought as he reached over to disconnect the com and cut the boy off. He snickered to himself and enjoyed the silence until Kaltenecker farted and he threw up his snack.
"What happened back here?" Coran exclaimed as the three Paladins piled out of the cargo hold. There was vomit covering the floor from all three of them.
"Keith puked up raw meat and blood which made Hunk hurl which made me hurl which made Hunk hurl which made me hurl which made Hunk -"
"I think they get it." He said, slapping a hand over Pidge's mouth. "The only reason I puked was because Lance's quiznaking cow farted in my mouth! I vote he has to clean this up."
"Oh, yeah, I second that!"
"HUUUNK! You traitor!" Lance whined. "And Kaltenecker is just as much Pidge's cow as she is mine!"
"Fine then you and Pidge can clean it up."
"WHAT THE HELL, KEITH?" Pidge shrieked.
"I don't care who cleans it up, just get it done." Shiro cut in, walking into the hangar with the princess and OMG her hair! Keith couldn't contain the bark of laughter that escaped him at the sight. There was a giant poof in the front with a braided loopy thing at the back and two long ponytails at the sides. Each one was segregated into clumps by at least 10 elastic bands, with one being incredibly long and the other incredibly poofy. She looked utterly absurd. It was amazing. Keith instantly regretted that he didn't have his data pad on him to take a snapshot of this moment.
"I got the scaultrite lens-stones, Princess!" Coran cheered as he ran past her. "Off to get the teludav up and running again!"
"Excellent news, Coran!" Allura smiled after him and turned the mess in front of her. There were crates of supplies and food scattered in the hangar, a fresh pie courtesy of Kaltenecker, and the distinct smell of vomit lingering in the air. Not to mention the state of the three Paladins who had been in the cargo hold. "Oh, dear. Lance and Shiro will you take care of the crates and the … um, creature while the other three get cleaned up?" it wasn't so much a question as a nicely phrased order.
His shower had been amazing. The feeling of washing all the nastiness off was incredible. Keith let the hot water run over his body for far longer than was necessary but he was just so relaxed. Beside him, in the next stall over, Hunk was humming a tune the young Galra didn't recognize but it was light and it was catchy, so he bopped his head along any way. Enjoying the company.
They met at the dining hall two vargas after arriving back to the Castle of Lions. Lance and Shiro had taken a quick shower after finishing with the supplies and finding a home for Kaltenecker. Hunk had vanished to the kitchens with the excitement of preparing an actual meal for them all to enjoy. And Pidge had roped Keith into helping finagle some sort of fix to allow them to setup their new system.
Somehow they had to find a way to connect the Earth tech of their gaming console with the Altean tech of the Castleship. It was not easy, and several mild electrocutions later, they were treated to the welcome screen and opening music of Killbot Phanstasm 1. After a quick celebratory 'woop woop' from Pidge, he had to literally drag the still squirming Green Paladin away from their new toy to join the others for dinner.
Keith dodges angry glares and dirty glances from a scorned Pidge while listening to Shiro retell the crazy adventure he went on to strengthen his bond with Black. In a way, Keith was jealous. Even though Shiro didn't actually travel to the long destroyed home of the Galra, he had still been treated to a vision of Planet Daibazaal back in it's glory. Admittedly it was hard to be upset when the out come was so great, no more dealing with the Emperor fighting for control. His connection to Black had been severed and Shiro's had been strengthened. This was good news for all of them.