Beep…beep…beep.

Everyone in the room sighed in relief. Nick's heart had been restarted. Jen felt like she might be sick from the stress of it all. But the machine indicated that he was alive. The doctors and nurses had all stopped shouting and rushing. Without their visible indication that they were out of the woods for the moment, Jen would not have been able to know that the emergency was over. There were so many people crowded around, Jen could not even see her husband lying in bed. But she saw the reactions. And she heard that beeping.

One by one, the doctors and nurses left the room. Jen vaguely heard one of them tell her that Nick was alright for now, but his heart might give out again. Only time would tell. But at last, Jen was alone with her husband again.

Cautiously, as though her sudden movements might shock him into heart failure again, Jen sat down in the uncomfortable chair beside Nick. She reached out to take his hand, but she stopped herself. Was she allowed to touch him? She wasn't quite sure. But she wanted to. She needed to. And so, with one shaky hand, Jen gently placed her fingertips on the back of his hand. When no more alarm bells went off, she picked up his hand and took it between both of his. She was careful to not jostle any of the IVs.

"Nick," she whispered.

He did not answer her. Obviously. He gave no indication that he heard her. Perhaps he hadn't. Or, if he had, he was simply unable to respond.

But Jen had things she knew she wanted to say. Things she needed him to hear. Even if he possibly couldn't. "I need you to get better, Nick. I need you back with me."

Jen's voice cracked. It was hoarse from crying and screaming. She actually had not cried in quite a while, all things considered. Briefly, she wondered if now would be a good time for it, while the children were out of the room. She wouldn't want to cry in front of them. Not till there was something to really cry about. But instead, Jen swallowed back that lump in her throat. She would save her tears for now.

"Please, Nick," she begged. She'd begged him to wake up when they were in the church, just after he'd been shot. She was begging him again. "You know we're not finished yet. You know we've got more to do. You and me, partners in everything, yeah? And you know we always said it was good we only had two kids so we aren't outnumbered. Oh you should have seen me today, Nick, trying to hold them both on my lap. They're too big for it now. And my lap's too small. They need you. We all need you. I can't be outnumbered, it's not fair."

She was starting to get a bit delirious. Not fair? Nothing about any of this was fair. It was not fair that Nick had been shot while diving to protect his children from a masked gunman. It was not fair that Duncan had been shot on his wedding day. It was not fair that Hope was missing her perfect reception party to be covered in blood in the waiting room of a hospital. It was not fair that Ella had been traumatized into muteness. It was not fair that Cody had broken his arm and gotten a green cast to show his dad who might not wake up. And it was certainly not fair that Jennifer Mapplethorpe, after so many years of not knowing what she wanted and not feeling like she deserved what she had, should be punished like this after finally claiming all the most wonderful things in life as her own.

Of course she was being ridiculous. She knew that. But now was perhaps the proper time to be ridiculous. Jen tried talking again, if only to stop herself from spiraling into her own thoughts. "Cody broke his arm. I know you're going to feel awful about it, but it's better than him getting shot." Those words left a bitter taste in her mouth. "And Ella's not talking. They're with Bernice now. She's so good with them. And she's going to get me something to change into. Hopefully you won't wake up and mock me for being in this stupid dress." At that, Jen remembered getting dressed that morning. A harsh chuckle fell from her lips. "I've got neon pink lace lingerie on under this stupid dress. I had a whole plan. I was going to take off the dress and come out of the bathroom in this, and I was going to get on my knees in front of you and do that thing you like with my tongue." Her face grew a little warm at the thought. "But we'll save that for another time, eh? Yeah. When you're feeling better and you can appreciate it."

"My wife doesn't do that with her tongue."

Jen looked up sharply to see Sam standing in the doorway.

"Sorry, couldn't help but overhear. Luckily, I'm not related to either of you by blood, so I can just say 'good on you' and leave it at that," he teased.

She smiled and chuckled slightly.

That made Sam smile back. "Good," he murmured, obviously pleased that he could make Jen have a moment of good feeling.

"What's the latest?" Jen asked. She was still holding Nick's hand. Now that she had it, she didn't want to let it go for anything.

"Danielle asked me to check on you. Where are the kids?"

"Bernice has them. They're going to have dinner and change their clothes, and she'll bring me back something," Jen said.

"Oh you don't want to stay in that dress all night?"

That made Jen smile again.

Sam sighed. "Danielle said she tried to get Hope to pick a different dress for you all, but she was pretty adamant."

"Well, that's Hope for you."

"I thought Duncan would put his foot down on the pink everywhere."

"You got that wrong," Jen said with a smirk. "On two counts. One, Duncan loves color and I've seen him very happily wear pink himself with pride. And two, he's probably physically incapable of saying no to something Hope wants."

"Think she's got him too far under her thumb?"

She shook her head. "Oh not like that. Dunny likes a strong-minded woman. And he likes having someone to pamper and take care of. He and Hope are perfect together."

"They really are," Sam agreed. "And by the way, he's awake now."

Jen nearly leapt out of her chair, but she knew better than to jostle Nick. "He is!?"

"Yeah. And he's asking about Nick. No one was sure what the latest update was, so I volunteered to check."

That brought Jen back to the sobering reality. "If you came by about ten minutes ago, you'd have seen his heart stop."

"What?!"

Jen had to swallow back that pesky lump in her throat again. "Yeah. He's okay for now. But the doctors said it could happen again. There's no way to know."

"Oh Christ, Jen, I'm so sorry. Here I am joking like an idiot about your sex life and Hope being a princess."

"It's okay, Sam. It helped," Jen replied softly. And it had helped. It helped to just talk about something light and normal and nice. Particularly to Sam. Danielle really had chosen the best possible husband. He looked like a superhero and he took care of cats and dogs for a living. And he was funny and kind and friendly and good with everyone. Jen was very pleased to have him as part of the family.

Sam frowned, a struggle evident on his face. "Is there anything I can do? I know that's probably a stupid question, but can I get you a coffee or something? Do you need a hug?"

"If you hug me, I'll probably burst into tears, and no one needs that right now. But I could definitely use a cup of tea if it's not too much trouble. With a splash of milk."

He nodded. "One tea with milk coming right up. I'll stop by and tell the family the update. I don't want to panic everyone, so maybe I'll just say it's still touch and go?"

"That's fine," Jen replied with a nod.

"Okay. I'll be back in a few minutes."

Sam turned and left, and Jen was alone with Nick again. She gently picked up his hand and brought it to her lips. "You were quiet, even for you," she said, somewhat appalled and amazed at her ability to have any sense of humor or sarcasm in the current moment. Maybe she really was delirious. Perhaps it was best if she stopped talking for the time being.

The only sound in the room after that was the steady beep…beep…beep.