Cadence Chapter Eight: Anguish
So...what's your story?" Ghazan asked.
Korra glanced at him. "What story?"
"The..." Ghazan made a vague motion towards his neck. "How'd you get saddled with that?"
"An altruistic impulse outweighed my self-preservation instincts."
"Really?"
Korra rolled her eyes. "I was exhausted when I stumbled across a group of travelers being taken as slaves by Sound. I fought with the Equalists rather than slink silently past and bam, here I am. Being dragged up hill and down dale by a jerk."
"You're not fond of Mako, are you?"
"Not at the moment, no."
Ghazan smirked. "So, you're a healer as well as the Avatar, huh?"
"Yeah, but my abilities are kind of limited with the collar on." Korra ran a finger across the metal lock for emphasis.
"But they're still pretty top-notch, right? I mean, Mako must have a good reason for bringing you along."
"Well, if he happens to let it slip, could you tell me what it is?"
Mako listened to the conversation in front of him with only half an ear. Korra had remained silent all throughout their journey out of the Equalist base, seeming to disdain walking with either him or Ghazan, and instead planted herself in the middle, striding along between them and occasionally muttering darkly under her breath.
Eventually, Ghazan had slid back and tried to engage her in conversation. His first attempts had been rebuffed rather rudely, but as he persisted, Korra's frosty attitude had gradually mellowed. It was obvious she was still a little wary of the black-haired man, though she was now talking easily with him.
Mako told himself he wasn't envious.
"Ah, cheer up, Princess," Ghazan grinned, feeling tempted to give her a hearty pat on the back but wary of giving Mako reason to enact his threat. "It could be worse."
Korra gave a rather inelegant snort. "True. That's the depressing thing about life; it can always get worse."
Ghazan chuckled again and in spite of herself, Korra found herself feeling a certain liking for him. He was vicious and crude, yes, but his daring grin and carefree attitude reminded her of Bolin, in a way.
Plus, it was nice to talk to someone who possessed actual conversational skills.
"So, where are we going, out of curiosity?" she asked.
"Sokka's grave," Ghazan explained. "I want his sword."
Korra blinked, casting her mind back and trying to remember if there had been anything particularly unusual about Sokka's sword, besides its size, of course. And then it clicked. Tenzin had once told her that his uncle's sword had been seen cutting through over a foot of solid steel. Whoever wielded this sword would be capable of taking on the world's strongest benders.
"Do you mean The Heaven's Sword?"
"Bingo, Princess," he grinned. "You're a clever one, aren't you?"
Korra shrugged, blinking as they emerged from the trees and she found herself facing the Great Nuktuk Bridge. She felt a nostalgic smile curl her lips and, when she risked a glance at Mako, she was startled to see him staring at the sign as well, his expression almost...fond.
"What's up with you two?" Ghazan asked, taking another swig of water.
"It's nothing," Mako said. "Let's go."
Korra trailed behind the two males as they crossed the Nuktuk Bridge, glancing down at the water that frothed and surged below them. For a civilian, it would have been suicide to attempt to swim it, but for a bender, and a water bender at that, it wouldn't be so much of an issue...
A bender probably had a very good chance of reaching land. If she just jumped off the side and struck out, staying underwater for as long as possible...
"Don't even think about it," Mako snapped, grabbing her arm just above the elbow and guiding her back to the middle of the bridge.
"I was just looking at the water!" she protested.
Mako said nothing, but Ghazan chuckled. "Come on, Princess, even I wouldn't be taken in by that one."
"Screw you, Lava boy," Korra groused.
Ghazan only laughed harder. "Anytime, Princess. Just not where your boyfriend might find us; he seems like the jealous type."
Korra rolled her eyes while Mako glared savagely at the other man.
Still, Korra thought it was interesting to note that he didn't release her arm until they had finished crossing the bridge.
"There it is," Korra said, nodding at the grave she had visited many years ago with Master Katara, Tenzin and his family. She didn't like the idea of Ghazan taking the sword, but she was in no position to argue against him doing so.
Ghazan grinned, wrapping his fingers around the handle of the gigantic blade eagerly. He pulled it from the ground, hefting it in his hands as though to test the weight of the sword. "It's pretty heavy..."
"You think?" Korra quipped sarcastically. "Wonder why?"
"Ouch, Princess, put that sharp tongue away before you cut yourself," Ghazan smirked, letting the sword rest on the ground once more.
Korra noticed the slight trembling of his muscles as he lowered it. "No offense intended to the man with the big sword, but do you think you can actually wield that thing?"
"The blades made under Piando are supposed to be passed down from generation to generation. I am his Piando's grandson, and so, the sword is rightfully mine, even if Sokka was the one who forged it" Ghazan narrated, fastening a thick leather strap around the blade.
"You didn't actually answer my question," Korra pointed out.
"Don't worry about me, Princess. I'll handle this thing just fine."
Korra shrugged, watching as Ghazan used the strap to secure the sword to his back.
"Alright, let's head off," he said at last. "The closest one first, right?"
"Um...guys?" Korra tried, pointing to where the sun was beginning to sink towards the horizon. "Unless this person is within a few kilometers or so of here, we're going to be traveling in the dark."
"So we'll stay at an inn somewhere first," Ghazan shrugged. "You got any cash, Mako?"
Korra knew he had. Before they had gone to find Ghazan, Mako had collected a lot of money from Equalist's treasury.
"He's got money," she said shortly. "Let's go find somewhere nice."
"So, are we going to get three rooms, are you going to be cheap and only get one?" Ghazan asked.
"We will get two rooms," Mako told them.
"What, one for us and another for Princess?"
For a moment, Korra dared to hope that she might be able to slip out and away in the dead of night. But those hopes were dissipated by Mako's reply.
"No; one room is for you, the other will be mine and Korra's."
Korra bit her lip against the urge to shriek 'why?' She knew why; Mako had anticipated her, and so moved to veto her escape attempt before it had even begun.
"I knew you were shagging her," Ghazan muttered, his voice low.
Mako shot him a quelling look and Korra pretended she hadn't heard him.
Korra turned on the shower, letting the warm water rush over her skin with a sigh of relief. It had been difficult to smile politely at the concierge as Mako ushered her into the hotel, when all she'd really wanted to do was scream for him to alert Republic City.
But the man was a civilian; everyone here was a civilian, and she wasn't going to put their lives and health on the line by getting them mixed up in her problems.
What was worse, the room Mako had bought for them had a double bed. She suspected the hotel employees were operating under the delusion they were lovers. But Korra was determined that they would not be sharing the bed; she'd had enough of that, thank you very much, and would prefer to use the couch.
Korra wrapped the towel around herself as she stepped out of the shower, taking the opportunity provided by the tall mirror to examine her collar again. She knew there was probably no way for her to remove it, but she couldn't resist checking it at every chance she had, just in case inspiration struck her.
She felt like one of those kids who asked if it was Christmas yet every day as soon as December rolled around.
But the more she examined, prodded, picked at or just tried to force the collar, the more she became convinced it couldn't be removed by any ordinary means. She was certain there was some sort of trick to it; there had to be, Korra refused to think about the possibility that the collar might never come off, that it was designed to be worn until death.
If she got back to Republic City, Lin would surely figure out a way to get the damn thing off her but she had to get away from Mako first.
She couldn't help but wonder exactly what the collar allowed her to do. She couldn't sense energy anymore, but could she still affect her own? Raise it and lower it at will?
She tried to shift into the Avatar state. But nothing happened. She couldn't feel the slightest shift in her energy levels. Of course, the collar only allowed her a small amount, and it was conceivable that anything above that level was simply cut off.
So Korra tried to suppress her energy levels instead, in the same way she'd hide from detection during a stealth mission. And she felt it work; her own energy dampened beneath her will, muffling her presence.
Korra barely had time to grin at herself in the mirror before the door to the bathroom was thrown open and Mako blew in like a hurricane.
Korra yelped and spun around, painfully aware that she was covered by nothing but a thin towel. "What in the flameo are you doing?"
Mako blinked, stared at her for a moment in complete silence, his amber eyes widening at the sight before him, before promptly exiting the bathroom, shutting the door behind him with a harsh slam.
Korra stared at the door, completely dumbfounded. What had just happened?
"Hey!" she yelled through the door. "What was that all about?"
"Do not suppress your energy again," came Mako's voice from their room, sounding slightly strained.
Korra finally understood. When her presence had winked out in the bathroom, Mako had had charged into the room, most likely thinking she was making another attempt at escape.
And instead, he'd gotten an eyeful. Korra found herself grateful she'd at least been wearing the towel. How embarrassing would it have been if Mako had walked in while she was naked?
She dressed hastily, grimacing as she tugged on the brown clothes she'd had since her capture, telling herself that she really needed some new clothes. She would love to have heard what lie Mako had concocted to explain her apparel to the people at the reception.
Forget her attire; she'd love to know what they thought the collar was. Maybe they assumed she was making some kind of bizarre fashion statement?
She stepped out of the bathroom, trying not to giggle when she noticed that Mako was pointedly looking anywhere but at her. Korra seized the pillows from one half of the bed and tossed them on the couch, arranging them neatly at one end.
"What are you doing?" Mako asked as she pulled a spare blanket out of the closet.
"I am not sleeping in that bed with you," Korra said bluntly. "I mean, now that we don't have to fool a pair of sadists into thinking that we're screwing each other, there's no point."
Mako's eyebrows lowered, and he tried not to think about the fact that he was feeling almost hurt by her statement.
Before he could response the door clicked open, and Ghazan strode in.
"Why are you here?" Mako snapped, clearly irritated.
"I was bored," he shrugged, noticing Korra setting up her makeshift bed on the couch. "You made Princess take the couch?"
"No, I decided I would take the couch," Korra corrected.
"So you aren't shagging her?" Questioning Mako.
"NO!" Korra exploded, her tension boiling over. "I am not his wife, or his girlfriend, or his lover or his 'pleasure slave'. We are not fucking each other, we are not fondling and we are not kissing. We are not doing anything remotely sexual!"
"Yeesh, I'm sorry I asked."
Korra forced her hands to relax from the fists they'd become, hoping her righteous anger would cool.
Ghazan, meanwhile, had turned back to Mako. "So, you're not making a move on Princess...does that mean you really are gay? Because I kinda wondered..."
Korra couldn't help it. She burst into laughter; real, deep, full-belly laughter. She clutched her stomach as the force of her wheezes almost doubled her over. She risked a glance towards Mako only to have the expression on his face send her into another fit of hysterical guffaws.
"You're pretty cheerful, aren't you?" Ghazan pointed out.
"For a kidnap victim, I suppose I am."
"...You really don't want to be here, do you?"
"What was your first clue?" she growled.
Mako was surprised at the flash of hurt that coursed through him. Once, she would have been happy to follow him...
He didn't know why, but something drove him to remind her of it. "I distinctly recall you offering you to come with me once."
Korra stiffened. "Maybe so, but I was a love struck teenage girl who had deluded herself into believing there was some good in you. I don't think anything I said that night can be taken seriously."
She was lying, of course; there was one part of that confession, more than a little embarrassing, that she had truly meant. And still meant, to her regret.
'I will always love you...'
"So it was a lie?" Mako asked quietly, and there was something in his eyes that told Korra he wasn't talking about her vow to help him.
She forced her lips into a smirk and turned her back on him, effectively dismissing their conversation. She didn't trust her abilities as an actor that far, not if she was looking him in the face.
"Well...maybe not at the time, but they'd certainly be a lie now."
And maybe if she kept telling herself that, she'd believe it one day.
"Now..." Korra shook her head. "Now...I'd never be here with you willingly."
"But you are here nonetheless," Mako said, his voice harsh. "And you'll remain with me until I say otherwise."
Ghazan simply watched them, musing on the fact that the first image that came to mind was that of a wave breaking against a rock. Korra was the wave, gathering force and power, smashing itself against the hard rock that was Mako and being dissipated against it's surface, left to withdraw and try again.
At first glance, it looked like the rock had won. But Ghazan knew better. Little by little, each wave wore the rock away, while the wave remained unchanged. In the end, it was the rock that yielded, not the waves.
Something told him this was the same. Mako might be standing strong against Korra at the moment, but it was only a matter of time before the tables were turned.
Mako watched Korra continue to arrange her bed, not paying any attention to him or making any effort to continue the conversation and felt strangely lost. It was a shock to realise that Korra's feelings for him had been almost a comfort of some sort; after all, if Korra could love him, there had to be something good in him, right?
But now she was saying she didn't anymore. That anything she might have felt for him was long gone.
And he was bizarrely, irrationally angry. Wasn't this what he'd wanted; for her to forget about him?
Then why did the reality of it make him want to tear something to pieces?
Korra tossed and turned on the couch, unable to get to sleep. It wasn't that her bed was uncomfortable; on the contrary, the couch was quite nice; soft but firm enough so she wasn't swallowed by it however her earlier argument with Mako kept reeling through her head.
She refused to admit she felt a little guilty. For Spirit's sake, the man had practically gloated about holding her prisoner; she was not going to feel guilty about lying to him.
So she shut her eyes and thought of other things, willing her mind back to Republic City and of home, reliving happier times, but no Fire Ferret memories, she was staying well away from those, and hoping her mind would eventually calm enough for her to drift off again.
For his part, Mako couldn't sleep either. But he didn't move around as he could hear Korra doing; instead he held himself perfectly still, hoping that eventually the exhaustion of the day would outweigh the agitation of his mind.
The time crawled by, measured in his slow, steady breaths as he tried to will his body into slumber. He heard the rustling of Korra's movement subside, her own breathing beginning to slow and even out as she slipped away from the conscious world.
Strangely, the knowledge that she was sleeping peacefully merely feet from him soothed Mako into sleep more quickly than any meditation could have.
Mako's eyes flew open and his hand reached for his kali sticks in the darkness, ready to defend himself against whatever had awoken him. He didn't want to risk using his bending, as it would reveal his presence in the dark room.
Then he realised there was no presence in the room save his and Korra's. He hadn't been awoken by an intruder, but by the soft whimpers and moans coming from his roommate.
Mako propped himself up on one elbow, squinting through the dark room in an effort to pinpoint the source of her distress. But there was nothing; Korra's eyes were still tightly shut, and the stilted, jerky movements that accompanied those small sounds told Mako she was in the grip of some kind of nightmare.
Hardly knowing why he was doing it, he rose from the bed and silently crossed the room.
Now that he was closer, Mako noticed small trails of tears streaked down her mocha cheeks glimmering in the moonlight, and realised that whatever Korra was dreaming about was causing her such anguish that she was actually crying.
He also realised, with a small shock, that this was the first time he'd seen her cry in more than a year. In fact, despite the fact that events of the past weeks had to have been rather harrowing for her, the last time he could remember seeing Korra cry was when he defected from Republic City.
The sleeping woman flinched, her tiny cry drawing him out of his thoughts. He watched her brow furrow, her face twisting into a pained expression and his hand was reaching out for her before he could stop it.
His fingers stroked through her hair, whispering gently across her face. She twitched and Mako snatched his hand back as though he'd been burned.
But when she didn't wake, his hand gravitated back towards her as though pulled by a magnet. His fingers rubbed over the frown lines on her forehead as though they could be smoothed like wet clay.
And to his astonishment, they were. Whether the feel of a hand on her face had comforted her or a new sensation had broken the rhythm of the nightmare, Korra's face relaxed by gradual inches, the knotted muscles underneath his fingers slowly losing their tension.
It was only when she sighed and tried to snuggle into the caress that Mako withdrew, feeling suddenly uncomfortable, as though he'd exposed some raw, vulnerable part of himself.
He slipped back into the bed, taking care to be as silent as possible so as to not rouse Korra.
Korra opened her eyes to soft morning light, awakened by the sound of the shower. A quick glance towards the bed found it empty, and Korra assumed Mako was preparing for the day ahead.
She pushed the blanket off her, grimacing as she tried to straighten her clothes; they had crumpled horribly during the night, and while Korra wasn't one to be worried over her appearance, the thing was just very uncomfortable.
She wondered if she could persuade Mako to buy her some new clothes.
She broached the subject as soon as he stepped out of the bathroom. "I need new clothes."
Mako looked her over, but Korra was not to be deterred, and ploughed on before he could say anything. "These clothes are stiff, itchy and do very little for my freedom of movement. If you're going to drag me around like a recalcitrant dog, at least have the decency to give me some proper clothes!"
"Later," Mako told her. "First, we will find the others."
Korra clenched her jaw against the urge to just scream out an obscenity or two.
There was a sharp rap on the door and Ghazan's voice drifted through the wood. "Hey, are you guys up? We going yet?"
"We're going," Mako said, strapping his kali sticks to his waist.
No matter how many times Korra used her bending to walk on water, there was always a feeling of surrealism about it. She watched fish dart beneath her feet as they crossed the sea with a small smile on her face.
At least the collar hadn't completely deprived her of her bending, or she had a feeling this sea-crossing, apparently necessary to find the 'next one', would have been very difficult. She was however, forced to travel by boat to their next destination despite begging Mako to allow her to trail behind the boat.
"So, why are you gathering a team?" Ghazan asked.
Mako glanced at him. "I have a goal. And there's a better chance of achieving that goal as a small team."
He glanced back at Korra, hanging over the side of the boat, her fingers skimming the edges of the water, looking as though she was ready to take any chance she could to escape. He regretted that she was going to be put at risk, but as he couldn't remove her collar, he couldn't risk going close to Republic City, and he couldn't just let her wander into the wilderness with so little of her usual strength. She was safer with him.
Listening to Ghazan and Mako talk about forming a team and friendships, Korra felt something burn in her stomach. She couldn't help but wonder why he didn't stay in Republic City; she, Bolin and Asami would have been glad to help him. Or were they not good enough?
Her chest squeezed painfully, and Korra ruthlessly pushed the thought away. She was not going to go through another round of heartbreak over Mako.
Still, that didn't mean she didn't yearn to hit him really hard about the head.
"Why so quiet, Princess?" Ghazan's voice interrupted her inner turmoil.
Korra's reply was honest. "If I'm silent, maybe you two will forget about me and I can sneak away."
"Forget about you?" Ghazan purred. "Don't think so..."
A muscle on the side of Mako's jaw flexed, and Ghazan decided to drop his flirtatious tone.
"But why Ming Hua?" Ghazan asked, changing the subject swiftly. "She's totally deranged and she hasn't exactly got the most charming attitude. Not to mention she's the reason I was locked up in a wooden crate underground. If we have to have a female along, Princess will get my vote any day."
"She's the reason you were locked up?" Korra asked softly, feeling a small kernel of sympathy lodge in her heart for him.
Ghazan glanced back at her, and there was an odd smile hovering on his mouth. She had the feeling it was meant to be cheeky, but it seemed to be more sad, than anything.
"You're a real soft touch, aren't you?"
Mako could practically feel Korra's heart going out to the man beside him, and shattered their moment of bonding when he cut in brusquely, "It's true there are a lot of other strong benders that could be handled more easily, but I need her unique abilities."
Korra set her jaw and clenched her fists against the sudden surge of irrational jealousy. Who cared if Mako needed this woman? She was his prisoner – what should she care who he traveled with and why?
But it still stung. He needed this woman for, whatever reason, and he'd never needed her. She had no idea why he'd dragged her along, but she was certain it wasn't because he needed her around.