Shortly after Billie had told him that he was still needed, that he had work to do, she had disappeared, saying that she was going to be back shortly. He wasn't sure how much time had passed, he didn't have his watch or his phone and it almost seemed like no time and yet hours had passed.
The empty entity also disappeared after Billie, staring at him with no eyes and that weird pressed in smile, leaving him completely alone.
He had stayed in place for a bit, however long that bit was he still wasn't sure, before he got to his feet, picked a random direction and started to walk for the lack of anything else to do.
He wasn't sure how long he was walking for, all he knew was the slowly growing burning feeling in his legs. He blinked and stopped realizing that there was something on his face, bringing his hand up and looking at it he realized that there were tears falling down his face.
Shaking his head he wiped his hand on his pants and kept walking, trying to will himself to keep walking until he could find something, anything, else that was here. He couldn't be the only one, there were plenty of other beings here, he just needed to find them.
But with each step that took him nowhere, with the pit that was growing in him more and more he had to face something that was starting to dig into him.
He didn't have a soul anymore, it was burned away, so theoretically, he shouldn't be feeling anything at all anymore.
But with every step that took him nowhere, with every step that changed nothing, with every step that brought him farther and closer to where he had been laying, he felt something small growing inside of him, growing more and more with each and every step he took until it felt like he was choking on it.
He was afraid.
That fear was growing more and more until his legs were starting to shake and he couldn't walk anymore, falling to his knees and hands.
His eyes were wide, not that it meant anything in this pitch darkness. His breath was coming out in short bursts and he swallowed hard and tried to control himself.
He started to cough for a moment, chest constricting as he tried to draw in air. He didn't need air but that fact seemed inconsequential at the time. He clawed at the ground and dug his nails into whatever it was made of.
He wanted to get out of here. He wanted to go back to Sam and Dean and Cas. He wanted to be back in the bunker with them, watching Netflix or working on a case, or anything else other than being here.
He wanted to go back to his family, he wanted to go back to where he was home.
But...was it really still home? He had killed Mary and thinking back to when he had spoken to Sam and Dean about it, it was more than clear that they were nowhere near forgiving as they tried to portray themselves to be.
They had tried to lock him into the box but...he had deserved it. He had killed Mary and ultimately, he hadn't even felt that bad about it. He felt worse about how Sam and Dean were going to react.
But now...thinking back to that moment, the moment he realized what he had done he remembered the hollow feeling and now...now it felt like he couldn't breathe. He felt the urge to throw up when he remembered seeing the clearing where Mary had been standing and he dry heaved when he remembered the realizing setting in that he had killed her.
Panting he fell onto his side, gasping for air. He pushed himself onto his back and stared up at the empty vastness.
He had no idea what Billie meant when she spoke to him. He had no idea if Sam and Dean and Cas were okay. He swallowed hard and coughed a few times, trying to clear his throat.
He wanted to go home.
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