Chapter 42
It's quite emotional for me to post the final chapter to my very first fanfiction. This story has been in my head for years, and I'm glad to finally write it down. Thank you for all your support and reviews!
Azula looked at the white robes the servants had left on her bed, knowing she wouldn't put them on. In just an hour, Zuko would be publicly mourning Akira's death, but she had to be gone by then. For everyone's sake.
Someone knocked on her door. "Come in," said Azula, still staring at the white gown. She hoped it wasn't Zuko; she wanted to slip away without a fight or a goodbye.
But of course it was him. He stepped inside, already dressed in white with gold trim. "You're not ready," Zuko said, standing a few paces back.
"I will be," Azula lied, smiling at her brother.
His eyes narrowed as he noticed a small packed bag on her bed. "You're leaving," he said in surprise. He looked hurt. "Why are you leaving?" he asked, taking a few steps towards her.
"You know I can't stay, Zuzu, even if I wanted to," replied Azula harshly. "The Earth King would probably declare war if I was allowed to live here."
"Do you want to stay?" asked Zuko, his voice low. "Because if you do, then damn the rest! I don't care what they say or what they do." His face was fierce.
"You don't want me here, Zuko," said Azula bitterly. "How could you trust me, after everything I've done?" Her hold on reality was better now, but at any moment she could turn against him.
"Azula, you're my sister," said Zuko, stopping right in front of her. "We're family, and family should stick together." He took a deep breath. "I want you to stay. So stay."
The words cut into Azula. Why did he always make everything so difficult? "I've only stuck around because I wanted to teach you to rule by fear, to be like me," she spat. "But my work here is done, so I should go."
"Rule by fear?" repeated Zuko. "Was fear why you came back to save me?"
For once, Azula couldn't find anything to say.
"Was fear why all those people in the street defended me?" asked Zuko passionately. "Do you think I'm asking you to stay with me because I fear you?"
"No," whispered Azula. Everything was crashing around her, and she swayed slightly. Zuko steadied her, putting both hands on her shoulders.
"Ozai lied when he told you that fear was the only way," Zuko said emphatically. "It's not."
"So what alternative do you propose?" mocked Azula, struggling to regain control. "Love?"
"Yes," said Zuko simply. His golden eyes were wide and earnest, his face open. It took Azula's breath away. How could he live like that, not knowing what people would do? Not being in control? But at the same time, something rang true about it. It was the same thing Zuko had been telling her ever since they had found their mother.
The world started reassembling itself in her mind. If people acted out of love, not just fear or self-interest, more things began to make sense. Why the Avatar hadn't killed Zuko, or Ozai. Why Mai had turned against Azula to save Zuko. Why Zuko had spared Ozai's life.
Why Zuko had forgiven her, again and again.
"I—I don't—" Azula's throat closed. She shook her head. In this new world, her life suddenly seemed empty.
"I know it's a lot to take in," said Zuko gently, his hands still bracing her. He half-smiled. "I've had four years to process it. Longer, actually," he mused. "Iroh was telling me stuff like this the whole time I was banished. Thank the Sages for him."
"You sound like you're grateful you were banished," said Azula weakly.
"I am," said Zuko. "If Father hadn't rejected me, I never would have learned the things I know now." His serenity baffled Azula.
"So. Will you stay?" asked Zuko again. "Join my family, Azula. Mai will come around. And you can get to know Kazuto." He took her hands earnestly. "You're the smartest person I know. Eventually, if you want, I could use your advice."
And just like that, he laid out everything she had never known she wanted. She imagined staying at the palace, celebrating festivals with Zuko and his family. Maybe winning back Mai's friendship. Helping him rule. Keeping them all safe. The future glowed with cozy firelight.
But even as she pictured it, the vision melted away. No matter what Zuko said, the Earth Kingdom would never accept her there. Staying would be selfish.
Love wasn't acting in self-interest. Love meant doing things for others. And Azula knew what she had to do.
"Thank you, Zuko," she said. Her face was wet, but she didn't wipe her tears away. "But I can't stay. If I stay here, I'll never be able to move on from who I was when I lived here last."
Zuko clutched her hands. "Are you sure?" he said roughly. "Azula, think of what you're giving up."
"I know," said Azula, looking up at his face. "Believe me, I know." She knew better than he ever would.
"Where will you go?" said Zuko, pained.
"To the colonies," said Azula. She realized this plan had been forming in the back of her mind for some time. "It's chaotic there. Everything's changing, and no one will notice me." She grinned through her tears. "As long as you don't give away the colonies to the Earth Kingdom, I should be safe."
"I won't," vowed Zuko. A silence fell as they stood there. Azula couldn't quite bring herself to step away.
"Promise me you'll come back," said Zuko. Tears welled in his eyes as well. "Promise me this isn't the end."
"Oh Zuzu," said Azula. "It's not that easy to get rid of me." He laughed, and pulled her into his arms.
"Stay safe out there," he said. Azula looked over Zuko's shoulder, trying to prevent herself from breaking down completely. It was ironic that on the same day she realized how the world worked, she had to leave everything she loved behind. She hugged her brother tightly, aware that it might be for the last time.
"You too," said Azula. "Life in the palace is more dangerous than life outside."
They pulled apart, and Zuko leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "We'll see each other again," he said firmly.
Someone knocked sharply. "Firelord, the funeral is about to start!" said Suki from behind the wooden door.
"That's my cue," said Azula. She tore herself away and grabbed her small bag, heading for the window.
"You're leaving out the window?" snorted Zuko incredulously. "Why do you have to be so dramatic?"
"How do you think I snuck into your bedroom a few weeks ago?" asked Azula, hoisting herself up to the ledge. "I've been living in my own room for months!"
And with that, she left, Zuko's laugh of surprise ringing in her ears.
Zuko stared out the window where his sister had disappeared, leaving his life just as abruptly as she had re-entered it. He supposed it was foolish, but when Azula had saved him from Akira and fought beside him, he had assumed she was there to stay. Or at least he hoped she would.
There was another knock on the door, and Mai entered, holding Kazuto. "Zuko, are you alright?" she asked, concerned. "We need to head out."
He wiped the remaining tears from his face. "Azula's gone," he said thickly.
"Oh," said Mai. She frowned slightly, but then moved to hold Zuko's hand. "I'm sorry," she said honestly. "I know you wanted her to stay."
"Daddy, where's Akira?" interrupted Kazuto. He had been asking for days, but Zuko hadn't had the heart to tell him.
"He's dead," said Zuko gently. "Do you know what that means?"
Kazuto's face fell. "Dead like Mama?" he asked quietly.
Zuko's throat closed. He couldn't answer.
"Yes, honey," said Mai. She kissed his forehead, eyes closed.
"He died bravely," added Zuko. He cleared his throat. "Akira saved my life. And he stood up for what he believed in." It was all true. If only Akira had been less impatient, they could have had more time…
"Okay," said Kazuto sadly. "I'll miss him." His bottom lip quivered.
"Me too, Kaz. Me too," said Zuko. He gathered his family close. "But we still have each other. And that's all I need."
"Zuko!" Suki and Sokka entered the room, both dressed in white.
"The funeral pyre is ready," said Suki. While Ozai had been buried quietly days before, Zuko had insisted on giving Prince Akira a full state funeral.
"We're coming," said Mai. She took Zuko's hand again, her hand smooth and warm over his.
"Wait!" said Sokka. He put his hand on Suki's back and ushered her over to Zuko, Mai, and Kazuto. "We need a Team Firelord hug." For the first time, no one resisted the hug. Over the past two months, they really had become a team.
They headed out together onto the front steps of the palace, white banners hanging across the palace and down the stairs. On a dais halfway down lay Akira's body, wrapped in white, on a pile of wood. Zuko supposed Akira would have hated being buried as a noble, but it was the only way Zuko knew to honor him.
Someone beat a slow drumbeat, and Zuko slowly descended the stairs, the eyes of hundreds of thousands of people upon him. His friends and family stayed behind, watching.
"Today, we mourn Prince Akira!" cried a Fire Sage behind Zuko. "He died with honor, fighting the New Ozai Society. He loathed injustice, and dreamed of a better world!" Zuko had told the Sage what to say, knowing it was a bit untraditional. Even though Akira had tried to kill him, Zuko couldn't hate his brother. In many ways, Akira had been right about how the world was run.
Zuko summoned a flame as he approached Akira's pyre. He wasn't giving up the throne, but he did have the power to change things for the lower classes. He only wished Akira was there to see it.
"Prince Akira, may your spirit find peace with the ancient sages!" said the Fire Sage.
"See you in the spirit realm," said Zuko quietly. He lit the pyre, and Akira's body went up in flames. Zuko bowed deeply, as did the crowd in front of him. Bits of ash and smoke danced above the fire, soaring into the sky, and Zuko watched them go.
"Long live Firelord Zuko!" yelled the Sage. Zuko turned, and saw a new banner unfurl at the top of the stairs. It was his tapestry, the one that would join the tapestries of his ancestors in the palace hall. The background was bright with multicolored fire, against which stood the symbols of all four elements: water, earth, fire, and air. In one hand, he held an olive branch, and in the other, Zuko held five small flames, one for each of his Agni Kai. The crowd let out a cheer.
Even from this distance, Zuko could see Mai and Kazuto, Sokka and Suki. His new family. Kazuto leaned forward, waving at Zuko, and Zuko smiled and lifted a hand.
"Kazuto!" he yelled. He climbed the stairs to join them.
THE END
Azula will return in a sequel to Heirs of Ozai.