It was too much to think about all at one time, Claudia figured she'd have to take things one day at a time. For right now she knew she had to focus on staying well and taking care of Gracie when she got here, those other questions would be answered in time. No one but Charlie and Emalee knew the truth, and that was the way it had to stay.

There were horror stories she'd heard of rape victims being sued for parental rights, Mac hadn't raped her, she had gone willingly, but she wasn't taking a chance on some dumb ass judge making her take the baby to see him in prison, because that was the sort of thing Mac would do. If he knew, he would see it as a way to control her.

Claudia never wanted to see him again.

The pull she had felt towards him was startling and something she never felt before, or since. In the end, she had gotten what she wanted, Mac in handcuffs on his way to jail. But now, with Gracie on the way she had to confront certain things about herself that she had let go before.

She had lured him to her, that was true and had ample time to arrest him, but she didn't right away. She had given herself over to a feeling that she couldn't recognize. Despite what she knew about him and his nature, what he was, she desired him. There had been no man in her life before him and no man now. The sick chemistry between them had been all consuming to her. Claudia had willingly given herself to him and there was no way she could say she regretted it, especially now.

But what did it say about her as a person, that she would fuck a known rapist and killer, she had gone to counseling looking for the answer to that question?

"You and me babe, how about it?"

While Mac was laying on his bunk busy thinking of her and yanking on his dick Claudia was laying in bed with her hands on her stomach. She wasn't thinking of him exactly, she was thinking of the baby girl, Gracie, created by him, but not his. Never his. Gracie would be hers alone, and he was never going to know about her.

As much as she didn't want to think of Mac, she had to, every time she looked down at her stomach she remembered him. She supposed it would be that way when Gracie arrived as well, watching her grow up, would she look like him? When she was old enough to ask about her father, what could she tell her?

Sometimes she could still feel his touch on her skin and it made her shiver and remember.

Late at night when she couldn't sleep she wished that they had met in some other way before he became what he was, maybe it would have been different. Maybe it could have been something.

It wasn't different, never would be and she knew exactly who and what he was. That was the part that disgusted her, the part she couldn't live with. In the end, she stopped going to counseling, it wasn't helping and she suspected she had been changed forever by that one night with him.

She wanted him, but she hated him, it was a grotesque paradox.

For months Claudia had been worried that she wouldn't bond with this child because of who the father was, because of him, and she had considered adoption seriously. But she was sure now, she loved her baby with every fiber of her being. Her baby. The first time she saw her on an ultrasound and heard her heartbeat she had still been ambivalent. But the first time she felt her move inside of her she broke down and cried; relieved that she loved her baby after all.

"Hey," She smiled to herself as she rubbed her stomach, sometimes if she pressed on her stomach Gracie would kick back, it was a game Claudia played with her, "I'm going to take care of you no matter what, I promise to always put you first. He's never going to know about you, don't you worry Gracie. I'll keep you safe, I'll keep us both safe."

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Short Time Jump

"Claudia, I need you to remain calm, can you sit down?" Charlie said into the phone when it was time to give her the news, and he was dreading it. This was going to freak her the fuck out, and the timing couldn't be worse, maybe it was justified, not maybe, it was justified, especially now.

No one knew Mac as well as she did, he had been her life's work, her obsession and she had caught him too. Claudia above all other people would know the significance of this information.

That was why Charlie had put off this talk with her as long as possible.

Claudia had been the first female FBI agent in three states to single-handedly take down a serial rapist and killer. Did she do it by the book? No, but she had figured out how to smoke him out and he had practically run to her; Mac had been so overwhelmed by her tactic that he risked getting caught for just one chance at her.

She had gotten a promotion and a transfer for her trouble and now she had Gracie too.

"What is it, Charlie?" She said as she settled the baby against her in the reclining chair. She had just gotten home from the hospital after having Gracie a few days before. Charlie's wife Emalee had brought her home, but Claudia insisted her cousin Belinda was coming to stay with her and sent Emalee home to Utah the day before.

Charlie knew there was no Belinda, Claudia had no real family, she just wanted to be alone with her new baby. Throughout the pregnancy, she had been afraid at times that she might not be able to bond with Gracie because of who her father was, but it had been love at first kick.

She cherished the life that was inside of her, motherhood was something she never knew she wanted until she got it. This baby with the light red hair and blue eyes, eyes that she had seen before had become her whole world before she ever arrived into this world.

"They tossed Mac Garcia's cell, a routine search after an anonymous tip and they found something." Charlie didn't know how to tell her this, it was going to ruin her day, ruin her joy over this baby, he decided to just be out with it, "He had a recent picture of you, taken a few months ago, and he's been sketching you again too."

Claudia felt her heart rate pick up, she remembered the sketches they had found in his house after his arrest, the spiders and of her. He had been as obsessed over her as she had been over him, maybe more so. Now he knew about the baby, her worst nightmare had come true, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Uh, you were kinda busy having a baby," Charlie answered, trying to add some levity to the situation.

"How," She breathed out, "How did he...?"

"Seems the public defender's office is backlogged and had to assign a female paralegal, apparently they had something going on and they think she got pissed off, made the call and ratted him out..."

"Oh, Jesus Christ!" She didn't even let him finish," Charlie, are you kidding me?"

"I wish I was," He answered, "She's been put on leave pending an investigation."

Her eyes were wide and angry now, "How could they assign a female paralegal to him?" Claudia could not believe the stupidity of the Utah public defenders office, he could manipulate any woman into doing what he wanted, hadn't he manipulated her, "They know what he is."

On the other end of the phone Charlie Pace winced, he missed his old partner, she was a ball of fire and she was right. Few agents had her insight, his new partner was a good man, but he was not her. Her gut feelings were almost always right, it was she who knew that wearing red, Mac's favorite color would make him focus on her. It had worked, he had seen it as her flirting with him and they had caught him on her instincts.

Cops like that were few and far between. Charlie never judged her for what else she had done, because in the end, they had gotten him, he never asked her why, never tried to figure it out. It was her business.

Whoever Mac's public defender was had fucked up royally, he had seduced some unsuspecting girl into doing his bidding and throwing her career right down the toilet. Charges were pending on her and she was never going to practice law again, all because of a manipulative asshole.

"He's going to find a way if he hasn't already, you don't understand how his mind works." Claudia paced on the phone, "He's always planning...something, now he knows about Gracie."
Claudia sucked in a breath as the reality hit her, "I'm going to have to run, you don't get it."

"Yeah, I do understand, that's why we're assigning a security detail to you."

"Forever? Come on Charlie, I just had a baby, now I have to move again goddammit. As long as he's alive he's going to try and reach his filthy hand out to me, jail or no jail, bars or no bars. He knows about Gracie, it's going to consume his mind, it's going to make him crazy."

"How's my goddaughter, huh?" Charlie asked, trying to change the subject.

Claudia sighed.

"She's, perfect and hungry as hell," Claudia laughed as she looked down at the baby latched onto her right breast as they spoke to each other, "She's just so wonderful, but I'm not sleeping, I try to sleep when she does but, that's not very often."

"Alright, keep trying to get some sleep sweetie, we got this," Charlie answered, "I'll be in touch, don't worry, he ain't going anywhere."

Claudia put the phone down and considered leaving the country, for real. She tried to remain calm about this, but it was difficult. She had intimate knowledge of how his mind worked. Maybe no one else knew him the way she did.

He knew about Gracie, she had gone to great lengths to prevent him from finding out she was pregnant, for him it would be a source of extreme pride, it would turn him on. That was the man he was, he would see Gracie as an extension of himself, in the way a true narcissist would.

Right now he was behind bars, miles away, but that was no comfort to Claudia at all.

One day he would come looking for them, Claudia knew that with every fiber of her being. As she sat there with the baby in her arms she started to make a plan.