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Work was boring sometimes.
he sometimes rolls a cart with mail to give to his coworkers.
he made sure every file is organized, sometimes when someone is looking for something,
he looked it up. same shit, different day.
Doris was a coworker who was a bit crazy. she once kissed a guy on the lips for no apparent reason then walked off.
she once told him during lunch that she was going to Alaska. she sent him a post card, it came from Florida.
she was nut, but she was harmless. she did her work, surprisingly well. other than that, yeah.
when lunch came around Lincoln had a chicken fried stake sandwich. courtesy of Lynn jr. the sandwich was superb. he took a big bite and took the moment to enjoy it. a fat guy in a sweater sat across from him and had his lunch. leftover pizza.
"man i'd kill for a home meal like that"
he muttered.
"get a woman."
lincoln replied.
"shit, women these days don't cook, much less want kids anymore"
which was true, well, the kids part. chicks these days were too focus on careers than to follow the good ol' American dream, having kids, and raising them with the father.
but then, men aren't always around to be men. in the old days, men worked hard, blood, sweat, and muscle. much less stick around and be a father. sometimes they were abusers and molesters, or just glorified sex hounds fucking every girl they meet. and too many dead beat dad's. lincoln wasn't one of them.
yeah, sure, lincoln wet his dick with his sister, mother, .. two chicks.. and he felt like a piece of shit. he always had. always having that guilt over his head. his sisters never gave him shit over it though, not when they see him work day in, day out. and on weekends he spends as much time with his children ... and his lovers.
"well, find one who actually cooks, and wants kids"
lincoln gestured with a finger.
"just make sure you got something to offer, like a stable income, a house, and a job. love isn't enough."
the fat guy, whose name is Keith a chubby dude with a balding head. and he was lincoln's age, well, he was 33, Lincoln was 31. he wore a white button up shirt, and tie, glasses.
"women are too picky if you ask me"
Lincoln shrugged.
"sometimes, hell, sometimes even if you have all that to provide a woman will find some reason to leave you."
several years ago, Lynn did leave him to be with Francisco, things got pretty rocky. he was heartbroken, was he being selfish in wanting to keep her like lucy and luna? maybe he was.
but it turned out that guy was a cheater. and she came back, they didn't talk right away but when they did, when they made up, and made hot love (while lucy watched) Leela was conceived.
since then their relationship was strong like steel, by crom! lincoln was happy with that. there were times they have a spat. it's only natural, they didn't always get along, they were still siblings despite the...relationship.
"so your kid Rachael is gonna move out soon?"
lincoln nodded.
"this year or the next"
he took another bite of his sandwich.
"i can't believe you have so many kids."
lincoln shrugged.
"and these women just fell in love with you?"
Lincoln didn't reveal much to him, so he lied to him that he had a harem. and that he had kids, some jackass mention about him fucking his own kids, as he was about to leave work, that burn his blood. needless to say, he beat the living hell out of him. Keith and a few others pulled lincoln away from the bruised and battered coworker.
nothing pissed him off more than someone talking shit about his kids, or himself, or even his sisters. some like rusty knew the truth behind it, clyde too. clyde never spoke to him again, rusty was more open-minded, after seeing the kids for himself.
overall life...was still...fucked up. he awoke from nightmares of being accused of fucking his kids, being arrested, his kids taken away, or the day someone rat out on him about his sisters and himself. incest wasn't legal here, not yet. road island was though.. a few states.
sigh.
he was stressing himself out again. he took a drink of his mountain dew. Keith was talking but he wasn't really listening
"hey Lincoln"
he paused his eating and looked at his coworker.
"i heard in Texas a kid cut off this guy's penis due to being molested for five years."
"i'm fucking eating."
"oh, sorry."
sigh. Keith really pissed him off. now he had that disturbing image. a dickless guy cut up by his own kid. it wasn't enough that his guilt pestered him, but the idea of 'what if' he went down a darker path. it made him sick. he always wondered if there was an alternate universe, but if he thought about it too much, it would make him feel disturbed.
looking back on his life, and his sisters, mother, his kids... dammnit. here comes the guilt. why couldn't he be happy? because he knew what he did was wrong. and the only reason why he worked was to make up for his sins. damn, he loved his kids though. they're his treasures in life.
"...guy deserved it"
he grunted and slap the half-eaten sandwich.
"what a sick fuck, oh. and thanks for ruining my meal"
he put the sandwich in an ace savvy tin-lunch box.
"thanks alot, asshole."
with that, he left and continued on with his labor of the day.
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When Rachael was born, she was premature. Rita was deathly worried, she complained about this, but the doc wasn't there that week, vacation or something, and Lincoln visited her, as did Rita. he remembers looking at her small little body, looking like a skinny...poor thing he just... he couldn't take it. he wasn't very religious, but that day he prayed to God to watch over his little girl.
he was what? 11-12? yeah. too much to take, even for him and...yeah... Rachael eventually got better and pulled through. since that day he was attached to her, more than Rita was. heh. he really couldn't help it. that pride of having a child...and just... well, he helps a lot in raising her. he fed her, changed her diapers, you name it.
eh, maybe his life isn't so bad, it was hard, no shit there, but sometimes he feels lucky to have such a wonderful daughter, and smart as fuck too. shit, she could give Lisa a run for her money. when he got home he was met with Rachael, who looked kinda nervous. biting her nails. he knew then this wasn't gonna be a good thing...
"what's up?"
Rachael looked at him with those big blue eyes. biting her lip.
"uhh...dad...Lugosi got a little creative on the hallway wall again..
no.
fuck.
NO!
he ran up the stairs and saw the walls were painted black, stick figures, and other shapes written all over the wall. some was dripping onto the carpet, in short, the place was a disaster!
"LUGOSI!"
he roared! he turned, he was going to kill that lil shit! ..yeah, no. fuck this. he regrets ever sticking my dick in lucy's cunt!
"LUCY!"
Lucy poked her head from the corner of the bedroom. so, she was hiding. he was infuriated by the fact that SOMEONE didn't fucking WATCH him! before he could unleash his fury upon her Rita came out of nowhere and placed her hands on his shoulders.
"it's being taken care of, the walls needed repainting anyway."
he turned to his mother and wife.
"but mom-"
"and i bought new carpeting anyway"
"Lugosi's still gonna get a spank-"
"i put him in the corner and he knows he's done wrong after i scoled him"
Lincoln's breathing was still heavy with anger. but it seemed rita took full control of the situation. she guides him down the stairs and walked him along down to the living room. which was empty. in fact, it was oddly quiet. she parked him on his master's chair and gave him the remote.
"you just relax, and I'll get you -you're dinner."
his gut growled. it seems it was on her side, after that he was slowly relaxed. Rachael sat on the couch and stayed silent.
when his mom came back she pulled the small fold out table and place it in front of him, she went back into the kitchen and placed six corn tortilla's, and he smelled the familiar aroma of roasted chicken. his mouth watered.
his mom must've bought a roasted chicken at Wal-mart, she then cracked open a can of official cherry coke. which only meant one thing, her food stamps came in. he didn't complain though,
he took a taco and bit into it, savoring the flavor. this, this was the life that made it worth living. when a man is treated like a man, a king. he was all for equality and such things, but it was fucking nice to be treated as men as hardworking as he should be treated. but then, his mother was his mother, and she treated him like the head of the household.
"this is kicking my ass it's so good"
he took a gulp of cola. rita smiled and patted his head, he lifted his face and nuzzle the hand that fed him. his eyes closed and enjoyed her motherly touch, the kind that brought peace in his world. it was funny, really. some men it wasn't always about sex, they want to have full conversations, they want to be held, cradled, loved.
in short- men want to make love to their mothers. it wasn't spoken outright, but it was true. some men look for qualities in women that is similar to their very own mothers. not much different from women who fall in love with men who remind them of their father's.
but he was literally making love to his mother. that was a big difference. like a Shakespearean type of thing, or something out of Greek mythic stories. her mother kissed his forehead and walked back into the kitchen lincoln continue to eat
Luna came in looking beat. grumbling she walked and sat on the couch. her grumpy face clicked off when rita brought tacos to luna, she didn't say anything but begin to eat like a caged starving redheaded stepchild.
lincoln didn't say anything, he knew her job was shit, and she had been wanting to find another one. Luna looked at him, and she kept staring at him while she ate. he knew something was up.
when dinner was done, everyone went to bed, lincoln and luna were the only ones alone.
"penny for your thoughts?"
luna sighed.
"...luv..."
she looked at him.
"i'm pregnant."
lincoln sat up and stared at her, she rubbed her neck and grinned.
"like we need another mouth, right?"
shit. just... fucking shit. just when things were just...ugh.
"...okay..."
he got up and sat with her, she lean on his shoulder and closed her eyes. he rubbed her shoulder, and she breathed in deep. for a long time, silence.
"i need a better job, or we'll never make it."
lincoln nodded.
"i know. maybe i'll take the day off, and we'll search for a new one."
luna nodded and nuzzled his neck.
"sounds like a plan, love."
lincoln smiled and brushed her hair.
"as good as any, luna."
sometimes in life, shit can be pretty hard...but sometimes... even in the face of life being a pain in the ass, there was still some good to behold. and...shit...what's the harm of one more kid?
(a week later...)
Lincoln didn't know how it happened.
it just did. like a swift punch in the stomach.
the kids barely understood the concept of death.
his mother, his lover, was shaking and wept on his shoulder.
he was surrounded by his sisters who hugged him and rita, their mother.
it happened so sudden. racheal was getting ready to leave for college, about to move out.
next hour they got a call.
she had gotten into an accident. she didn't survive.
all lincoln could hear was a ringing in his ear. like being hit by a flash bomb. he felt weak, like floating into an abyss. nothing could have prepared him or his mother. nothing. he just felt...lost.
a parent shouldn't go through with such heartbreak. he clenched his mother. and buried his face into her soft golden-silver hair. and he cried. hard. rocking her back and forth. both sharing the pain. and the more he thought about it, the harder he cried. until he was screaming in agony.
lucy took the kids upstairs to explain the dire situation. after what felt like an eternity, silence.
he simply held rita and sniffled. one by one his sisters left them alone. deathly silence. as if none dared to even breath. all lincoln coul do was stare at nothing and breath in his mother's scent.
"...i guess i this is a bad time to tell you, sweetie.."
he shifted, and looked at his mother, her tired, bloodshot eyes staring.
"I'm pregnant."
Boom. ... talk about bittersweet...
she looked at him and touched her son's face. her lips trembled, and he kissed her. all they could do was comfort each other in their darkest hour.
but the pain will last a lifetime.
Lincoln knew it, his mother knew it, his sisters knew it.
sometimes... sometimes when everything was all right with the world...
life kicks you in the Jimmie and leaves you curled on the curve of the street.
that night, they didn't get much sleep. and Lincoln called in for a sick day...
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to be continued.