Sonic's Great Cosmic and Euphoric Adventure chapter 3
Sonic and Zeena were eating with Donald Trump at the table, as he had gotten up about 3 hours after they did. "This is some good fuckin' food." Trump said. "Thank you." Zeena said. "Well at least you have some manners.. man, I'm lightheaded as FUCK bro, i think i need some more of the good shit." Donald said. Sonic glanced up at him with a look of confusion thinking to himself "why does he need that stuff so much?". Once sonic had finished eating he couldn't help but notice Donald sleeping on the table. He assumed that he had just taken more of his pills but something was different.
Trump was actually getting up out of his seat, pushing it in and walking towards the couch where he'd then slump over on. As sonic got ready to take a shower in preparation for his big day he suddenly heard Donald talking. "y'knOW wHat… you're hot AsFUCK aNd if you weren't my daughter I'd TotAlLy fUcK yoU!" he said before turning on the tv. Sonic had the bright idea of trying to do something and seeing if the sleepy president reacted in some way. Sonic took the phone out of Donald's hand only to have it snatched away followed by Trump going "Excuse me, giive my my goddamn fuckin' shit back ya phone theft ass crooked bitch…" with his head turned directly towards sonic and his eyes completely shut which came as a surprise to him, as he never thought that he'd actually be sleep walking.
"whoa!" sonic exclaimed as he looked at the president's fingers still moving and tapping something that looked like a one of those keyboards that tails used. The phone began to ring and Donald immediately rose up with his eyes wide open as he answered it. He had forgotten that his phone was on speaker so when he got ready to say something someone's voice boomed out of the phone saying "the revolution will not be televised! Follow my instagram!". "Excuse me, the Fuuck're you supposed to BE?! You're not Putin, bitch!" Donald said angrily. "First of all nigga, I am your fuckin' god and you do what the fuck i say… i will come for you, sir.. nuclear war soon to purge the planet?" the man said with a very serious tone. "Excuse you Motherfucker? I run your punk ass with my fuckin' government and laws that i push out! Don't you ever challenge my authority again unless you wish to break the world record for the most raped pussy in prison!" Trump said. "WHY THIS BITCH TRYNA PLAY ME ARE YOU CRAZY? DUMMY BOY!" the strange man screeched out. As soon as he heard that, the furious president then called the police and swat team to trace back the location of this man. After getting this information he then took both sonic and Zeena to the man's apartment only to be greeted with a black person with a box cut screaming "FOLLOW MY INSTAGRAM!" out of his window.
Trump nodded his head and watched as a police officer with a nightstick and shades looked up and went "Open the door! We won't hurt you!". In response to that the black dude said "I'm fine! I'm perfectly fine! I'm ok!" as the police officer slowly walked up to the door. He then made a signal with his hand which suddenly made a swarm of cops rush in as well as swat officers who managed to get through to his hallway. "open the door!" the police officer said, as he led them up there. "no. Follow my instagram, it A!" the crazy black man said.
"Etika?" sonic said as he had heard that and was curious. Sonic took Zeena out of the car and ran her up past the swat officers and made it up to etika's door. "who're you and what's up with this guy?" he asked the police officer with shades. "I'm Tom, i just recently relocated to Dc. It's my first case here but this guy seems to have a screw loose. Hey, aren't you sonic the hedgehog?" "I was just playing smash and masturbating before you showed up." etika said interrupting Tom and sonic's conversation. A swat officer slowly turned around the corner of the hall to back Tom up. Suddenly Tom had stopped the officer and told him to hand over his gear and equipment.
"How do you know me?" sonic asked. "They made a video game about you little guy." Tom said as he grabbed the ram and proceeded to hit the apartment door, slowly wearing it down. Before the door was completely down Tom told etika to show his hands with the only thing in his possession being his phone in his right hand. Before they took the last bash Donald walked up to tom and said "Let me do this shit, I'm the only one worthy of it." before knocking it down. As soon as that door crashed Tom ran in and tackled etika who then punched him in the face. Sonic seen this and grabbed etika's arms as Tom pinned him down putting the handcuffs on his wrists. Before standing etika up sonic commanded Zeena to freeze the cuffs so that they wouldn't loosen up. Etika was walked out screaming "JOYCON BOYZ! JOYCON BOYZ! JOYCON BOYZ!" as he tried to resist and spazzed out as he was put in the police car. Before shutting the door, Tom let Trump spit on etika.
"Get in the car, buddy. I'm gonna need some company." Tom said. Sonic opened the door and stepped in looking back at Trump's car to make sure that Zeena was where she needed to be. After taking etika to jail sonic and Tom were just making small talk in his personal car. As they drove down the street talking to each other a lead pipe suddenly shot through the back windshield going through the front windshield. Sonic and Tom screamed simultaneously as they looked back only to see a huge pile of junk flying towards them. A truck flipped over and slid blocking them off as Tom pumped on the breaks so hard that sonic launched out of the roof's window, side flipped twice and landed on his feet. He looked up and saw a white hedgehog with trash floating around him.
"Why'd you have to do that?! We were just having some fun, man!" sonic said. "You're responsible for destroying my world!" the white hedgehog screamed out. "Well isn't this familiar?" sonic said as those words had just rang a few bells. "I am silver!" the white hog said before throwing a metal water tank at sonic who hopped onto it, hopped onto another piece of trash and punched him down to the ground. "go backwards!" sonic said to Tom after hopping back in the car. Tom went in reverse as fast as he could and the only indication of safety was the loud thud that was heard. When sonic looked back he saw silver pinned to the pile of garbage which began to fall apart.
"I think it's time for a bit of community service, you up to it?" Tom said. Sonic hopped out the car and went "i got this, just leave it to me!". He prepared by stretching and getting into a runner's pose with his hands on the ground and one leg behind the other. "Gotta go fast!" he said to himself as he began to run around pushing the garbage out of the road into the woods that surrounded it. Before they knew it the garbage was moved but there was one problem, the car wasn't turning on. "Did you ever shut this thing down?" sonic asked. "No, i don't think so.." Tom said in response to that. They had to walk back to the white house. On the way there Tom got a call from someone, it was his girlfriend. "hello? Yeah, I've got some bad news… The new car's messed up and i have no way to get it off the road…" Tom said. Soon his girlfriend erupted in anger questioning how in the world that could've happened and sonic could hear every word from her.
Eventually she stopped and noticed that nothing in the house was working and asked "Do we have a generator anywhere?". "Uhh, no i don't think so. Why, is there something wrong?" Tom asked before receiving another call. He got done talking to her and answered the other caller. "Excuse me...GET YOURASS OVER HERRE! WE'RE OUT OF POWER AND WE NEED SOMEBODY TO FUCKIN' FIX IT NOW!" the caller said. Sonic smirked and thought to himself "That's Trump, alright!". "We'd better get there asap, Tom. The president needs help!" he said. "Ok, but i don't know if my insurance can pay for this… I just got that thing and it's already totaled." said Tom who was chugging behind sonic.
4 hours later when sonic and Tom arrived the white house's door was wide open. Zeena was walking in with a bottle of gasoline and sonic looked at it weirdly. That substance is foreign to him so of course he asked "what're you drinking snow cone?". "This is gas for the power generator, I think someone knocked out all of the electricity here." Zeena said as she bent over to fill the tank. Tom sat down for a bit watching whatever came on tv with Trump. Zeena was just passing by when suddenly Tom asked "Who're you? You're pretty cute. I've never seen a creature like you before, are you an alien by any chance?". "My name is Zeena and I'm a Zeti." she said as she continued walking away. After about 3 minutes she returned with some drinks for the two on the couch. Sonic then walked in after taking a cat nap to sit on the floor in front of the couch. Zeena began to snuggle with sonic and said "well this was an interesting day wasn't it, blue boy?". "indeed." sonic said as they all relaxed until the power was cut back on and it was time for Trump to take Tom home.
Thanks for reading my this chapter. I figured that putting Tom the cop in this would bring something fun and interesting to the table in the future. I hope you enjoyed it.
Sonicspeed signing out.