Author's note:

Dear readers,

another chapter for you to enjoy. Thank you so much for reading, reviewing, favoriting and/or following my story. It warms my heart.

Have a nice day,

Vani12

Chapter 11 – Heartbreaks can be mended by your one true love, I!

Living Room, Prince Manor, December 1978

Orion breathed in his one true love's unique vanilla, belladonna, and roses scent. How much he had missed to embrace her and simply be near her. Whenever he had smelled the mix of roses and belladonna, he had turned around and hoped to be faced with the lovely heart-shaped face of his Eileen. But it had always been other women that wore a similar fragrance as Eileen. He gazed into her warm onyx eyes, caressed her rosé cheeks gently and uttered in a dazed voice, "I can't believe that I finally have you in my arms again. Your new hair-cut looks stunning on you. Your bob makes your onyx eyes pop and emphasizes your delicate facial features. I'm sorry to descend on you like this, but I had to see you again. I can't live another day without you, my love." He stated in an emotional voice and kissed her softly on her head.

He noticed that she tightened her embrace around him, shivered at his kiss and sobbed silently. Her face was quickly streaked with tears and she mumbled into his chest in a broken voice, "Oh, Orion. I can't fathom how you are here now. I missed you like crazy and wish that we could have our chance at our happily ever after. But I'm not the same optimistic, innocent and good-hearted girl you have fallen in love with anymore. I'm a broken, sarcastic and evil woman now. My whole life is riddled by secrets, misery, and unhappiness. I broke your heart. I don't deserve your love. You should hate me for all the things that I have done to you." Orion looked bewildered at her words, stroked her back soothingly and gazed at his love in alarm. She looked stunning in her forest green pantsuit that hugged her curves and underlined the beauty of her amber jewelry – his amber promise ring and talisman. But her face was distorted into an anguished, guilt-ridden mask.

"Why does Eileen torture herself for her past actions? She must know that Walburga has been the puppet master in our romance gone bad. My sweet, kind and beautiful Eileen calls herself evil and broken? She could never be evil or broken to me. I could never hate her. I must dispell her dark thoughts right now," a panicked voice screamed inside of Orion's head. He embraced her face, locked his fiery flashing sapphire eyes with her tormented onyx ones and stated in his deep baritone, "Stop your self-flagellation right now, Eileen. I know that we two have changed over the past nineteen years and we will have to get to know each other again. But nothing could erase my love for you out of my heart. I don't believe for a second that you are an evil woman. You don't have any evil bone in your body. So, please, stop to torture yourself with regrets, guilty feelings and shame. Our love can survive everything. And I know that my insane, Dark Arts obsessed wife Walburga separated us with her schemes and lies. Don't let that dark witch succeed by shutting me out of your life, Eileen." Orion gifted Eileen with an honest, hopeful smile, but when she stepped out of his embrace, broke their eye-contact and hugged herself like a lonely, desolate child, his heart shattered into million pieces.

She rocked herself in a desperate attempt to get some comfort, leveled her gaze onto the ground and cried in a heart-wrenching voice, "You don't understand, Orion. Walburga might have been the force behind our break-up and my escape into the Muggle world, but I have imprisoned myself in an abusive marriage and haven't protected my little prince good enough against the cruel words, painful kicks and heavy beatings of the bastard Tobias. Hell, you have warned me that he is a twisted creep but I nevertheless tried to escape my issues in his arms. You should look with disgust and hate at me. I have let myself be reduced into a magic-renouncing, submissive battered wife who couldn't protect and care probably for her son. My actions have nearly broken Severus. He had channeled his hatred for Tobias into a hatred for the world and Muggles and gotten obsessed with the Dark Arts. If it hadn't been for the love, care and friendship of Olivia and Regulus, I would have lost my little prince to a world full of darkness. Merlin, he would most likely have jumped into alcohol or drug addiction, thrown away his education and been vulnerable to the promises of Voldemort, if his newly-wedded wife and best mate hadn't rescued him.

"I have been a bad mother. My fears, depression, heartbreak, and loneliness turned me into a monster who flinched away from human contact, dressed her son in tattered clothes and lived in her own fantasy world. I tried to mend Severus bruised skin, broken bones and hurt soul with wandless Healing Spells, herbal concoctions, wondrous tales of the Magical world, soothing lullabies and love declarations. But I failed him. I wasn't strong enough to protect him against Tobias and make him feel safe and loved at home. I tried but I was powerless against Tobias alcohol-induced rages, rants and beatings. Thus, I'm a weak, broken and fucked-up bad mother who doesn't deserve your love." Eileen broke down on the floor in front of her fireplace and rocked herself in an embryonic position. It broke Orion's heart to see his love reduced to a self-loathing, desperate mess. He was shocked to hear that she had suffered as a battered wife at the hands of this Muggle creep Tobias Snape. He wanted to apparate to his shack, beat his drunken arse and rip him in two for his crimes. But he needed to comfort Eileen, dispell her bad memories and be there for her now.

Hence, he seated himself on the floor, crawled to Eileen and cradled her sobs-wrecked body lovingly in his arms. He whispered into her ear, "Eileen, please, stop your self-flagellation. It shatters my heart to see you so broken and desolate. I'm sure that your son would embrace you tightly right know, console you and assure you that you have been the best mum you could be to him. He loves you and knows that you love him. Merlin, it wasn't your fault that this Muggle creep abused his power as your husband and shamelessly tormented your son and you emotionally and physically. You weren't a match to his physis and alien to the Muggle world. I bet that he broke your wand, controlled you with some twisted tales of love, loyalty, and gratitude and isolated you from your friends and family. Hell, I would give everything to break every bone in his body right now as a punishment for his despicable actions. A male who beats his wife and son, bullies them emotionally and forces them to live a life in fear, poverty, pain, and misery, is a disgrace to all men. He is the soulless, evil monster, not you, Eileen. Not even one of these Muggle superheroes would have been able to protect his child against every hurt in your position.

"I can't even imagine how hellish, dark and hopeless your life must have been. But I trust that your circumstances, fears and mind state forced you to stay in this abusive environment for so long. We are all humans and make mistakes. I'm plagued by my own nightmares every night in which my insane wife tests out dark curses on my sons, forces them to torture our house-elves or calls them two dumb, weak blood-traitors. I curse myself with every fiber of my heart that I have neglected my sons, looked away on the signs of their emotional and physical distress and surrendered them to the craziness of Walburga for so long. I have only started to act when she wanted to brand Regulus with the Dark Mark. Thus, I won't judge you for your parental mistakes. I'm no poster dad myself. But I know that we can help each other heal if we only open up our hearts for our love. I'm aware that our path to our happily ever after will be rocky and painful, but we can get there if we only believe in it. Everyone deserves to have a second chance and be loved, Eileen." Orion ended his pep talk with a gentle squeeze on her shoulder and loving caress through her ebony bob.

Eileen calmed down in his arms, basked in his warmth, comfort, and love and breathed in his familiar scent. Her sobs started to ebb down and she clung desperately to Orion's muscular frame. She was embarrassed that she had let herself be ruled by her emotions like a fragile, hurt girl during her reunion with Orion. To see the love in his sapphire eyes, a hopeful smile plastered on his handsome face and his dark-brown curls bounce enthusiastically on his head had been too much for her. She was eaten alive by her guilt, regrets and dark secrets. How could Orion love a broken, regretful bad mother like her? She was a shell of her former self, whereas Orion seemed to have aged with dignity. Only a few wrinkles graced his forehead, eyes, and cheeks, but his handsome smile was still the same. Sure, his baby blues were marked by his own regrets, heartbreak, and sorrow, but they sparkled at her with hope, love, and compassion as if she was his lifeline. Eileen feared that they would flash with hurt, betrayal, and anger at her in a few minutes. But she was fed up with her net of lies and realized that only complete honesty could pave the way to their second chance. Orion seemed to be haunted by his own regrets, misery, and unhappiness. Perhaps, they were kindred spirits after all who understood each other, loved each other unconditionally and could forgive each other for their mistakes. She needed to rip off the bandaid fast before she lost her courage.

Thus, she pulled back from his embrace, gazed him gratefully in the eyes and urged him with an arm gesture to stand up. He helped her up from the floor, supported her svelte frame with a gentle hand on her lower back and walked with her to her grey couch. They seated themselves beside each other on the upholstery, intertwined their fingers and faced each other with a smile. Eileen gathered all her courage, drew strength from his positive aura and stated in a calm, clear voice, "I'm sorry if I have frightened you with my breakdown, Orion. It wasn't my attention to cause you distress. I'm happy to see you again, feel your strong arms around me and hear your deep voice. Thank you for helping me through my breakdown with your love, patience, and compassion. I wish that I hadn't reacted like this to our reunion, but my emotions were too much for me. My shame, guilt and self-loathing gets the best of me in my darkest hours. And I couldn't handle seeing you again after nearly twenty years. My heartbreak, regrets, and anxiety overwhelmed me and I could only focus on the thoughts that you must be disappointed to see the broken shell of your first love and find out about her crimes.

"But you are right, Orion. We both aren't the loved-up teenagers we once were any more, but our love and deep connection still remain despite our past heartbreak, despair, and unhappiness. We have both been dealt with a dire fate and if I could turn back time I would change my actions on this fateful April night in 1959 in a heartbeat. I would be strong and fight for our love. Sadly, I can't turn back time and I realize that using a time-turner would be the easy way out. We are both marked by the past nineteen years of our life and are who we are today because of them. I'm sorry to hear that you are also hunted by the regret to not have been able to protect your children sufficiently. I feel for you and know how you must be beating yourself up over it. To see your child unhappy, desperate and in pain because of your inactions is the greatest pain of any parent. Perhaps, an open heart-to-heart talk will help ourselves to heal somewhat. Thus, I'm going to be brave for once and open up about my past regrets." She took a deep breath, squeezed Orion's warm hand and started her tale with a shaky voice.

"You must have felt hurt and betrayed to read my engagement announcement to Abraxas Malfoy in the Daily Prophet. I wish that I had been more cunning, stronger and braver in the spring of 1959. You have to believe me that I have never been in love with Abraxas Malfoy. Sure, he was charming and had taken an interest in me, but I had only eyes for you. When he proposed marriage to me in mid-April, I didn't flat out reject him because I couldn't blurt out the secret of our forbidden romance. In the eyes of the Wizarding upper-class, I was an unattached, love-starved young woman who was free to be romanced by charming bachelors and longed to settle down with her own family, whereas you were the soon-to-be-married, handsome Black heir who loved to see his best female friend happy and scrutinized her suitors with eagle eyes. I couldn't risk revealing our secret romance by denying Abraxas straight-on. He would have never believed me that I rejected him on the account of not seeing myself fall in love with him in the future and forced me to be honest with him. Perhaps, he would have gotten suspicious of our close friendship, put two and two together and accused me of having a scandalous love affair with you. Our plans of coming out as a couple in May, freeing you of your forced marriage and living a happy life in our cottage would have been destroyed. Thus, I have asked Abraxas for one week to rethink his marriage proposal to buy us some time.

"But somehow, Walburga must have heard of his marriage proposal through the rumor mill, for she blackmailed me into marrying him. She sent me a lovely letter with a moving picture of you and her naked in bed, taunted me with her pregnancy due to some Fertility Potion and threatened to kill you with some deathly poison if I didn't announce my marriage proposal with Abraxas in the next Daily Prophet. In retrospective, I know that I shouldn't have fallen prey to her threats, contacted you and reported her blackmail and illegal use of potions to the Aurors. I realize that I hurt you and Abraxas with my fake engagement. Although he has a dark reputation, he has always been sweet to me, treated me like a real gentleman and considered my feelings. I suspect that he knew deep down in his bones that my heart belonged to another, but he hoped that I would come to love him over time. It was never my intention to break your heart or abandon you to your dark fate with Walburga. I didn't believe for a minute that you cheated on me with her and suspected that she lured you into her bed with a Love Potion and Aphrodisiacs. But her threat on your life, which she underlined with a sample of your fragrance mixed with a highly deadly poison, and the fact that she was carrying your child, crushed down my hopes for our future. I was paralyzed with fears and despair and could only play her obedient lap dog. I'm sorry for giving up on our dream life without a fight, my love." Tears glistered in Eileen's eyes and she caressed Orion's face gently.

Orion put his hand on her hand and uttered in an astonished, enraged voice, "I also should have fought more for our love, Eileen. I can't believe that the insane harpy blackmailed you into getting engaged to Abraxas Malfoy. If she weren't already wasting away in a padded cell, I would throw Walburga into Azkaban for her crimes. She has destroyed everything between us and fucked up our lives. Hell, she is such a sly, manipulative and evil bitch. I wish my instincts had been as spot on as your senses, for I must admit that I have fallen prey to her Love Potion and Aphrodisiacs. She tricked me into bedding her and taunted me with the news that she hadn't only basically raped me but secured that she conceived my child during our drug-induced shag. Melin, it felt like my nightmare come true to wake up naked in her bed. She blackmailed me into marrying her to save my face, avoid a scandal and step up to my duties as her baby daddy. My first instinct had been to call the Aurors on her, confess her evil schemes to you and co-parent my child with her. But she pointed out to me that only a weak wizard wouldn't be able to detect a Love Potion, that I would ruin the reputation of the Blacks by calling the Aurors and shame my family by throwing my pregnant fiancée into Azkaban.

"When I confessed to her that I didn't care about these things and wanted to elope with you, she upped her game and confronted me with loved-up pictures of Abraxas and you and some smutty love letters between this creepy Muggle, Tobias Snape, and you. I called her a liar and knew deep down in my heart that you would never cheat on me like this. You loved me unconditionally, showed me your true self and planned a future with me. My heart urged me to detect the spells on the staged photos and letters, but I couldn't find any. Seeing you wrapped up in the embrace of Abraxas, his hand resting on your lower back and your lips kissing his with desire, shattered my heart into million pieces, let my jealousy blind me to the truth and my mind run into overdrive. But reading these filthy, smutty love letters to Tobias Snape in your script where you mocked my sports enthusiasm, praised his bedroom skills and called me a naïve fool, cut me to the quick. I must confess that my heart turned to stone on this day and that I desperately wanted to have an explanation from you. A tiny voice inside my panicked mind screamed at me that Walburga had used some dark spells that I didn't know to forge the letters and pictures because you would never betray me like this. But I squashed it and questioned our whole love story. The coffin nail that verified your cheating to me was your marriage announcement to Abraxas Malfoy in the morning issue of the Daily Prophet. I broke down into tears and agreed to marry Walburga. If the love of my life had ripped out my heart and I survived it, I could survive a loveless, miserable marriage with my crazy second cousin.

"I deluded myself into thinking that I had nothing left to fight for. Hell, my angry owls and pathetic Patronus messages – I haven't been able to produce my strong, corporal Thunderbird Patronus since our breakup – were desperate attempts to receive an explanation for your cheating and lies. I'm glad that you returned them unopened or that the bounced off of your wards, for I'm deeply ashamed of my angry, hurt and foul ramblings. I'm sorry for ever doubting your love, Eileen. I have been a heartbroken fool. But I would have never expected that Walburga could stoop so low as to frighten you with death threats and muddle my brain with her forged evidence. I hope that you can forgive me for not believing in the pureness and goodness of your heart, my love." Orion uttered in an ashamed voice and evaded her gaze.

Eileen was speechless. "Walburga has forged some smutty love letters between Tobias and me as well as staged some salacious magical photos featuring Abraxas Malfoy and me? Damn, I would have never thought that she could stoop so low only to cause Orion pain. Merlin, Orion really thought that I had ripped out his heart, hacked it into shreds and chewed on it with delight and glee. I'm hurt that he didn't trust me more, but if I'm totally honest with myself, I don't know how I would have reacted if our roles were reversed. And you aren't an angel either, Eileen. You still haven't told Orion about his son," a scathing voice scolded her in her thoughts. Eileen moved closer to Orion, put her left hand under his chin and kissed him sweetly on the lips. She poured all the love, compassion and forgiveness she could muster up into her kiss and was delighted when her one true love returned her kiss.

Before she lost herself in his kisses and lost the courage to reveal her dark secret completely, she pulled back from his lips, gnawed on her bottom lip and expressed with warm obsidian eyes, "I needed to show you my forgiveness with my kiss, my love. I can't fathom how painful it must have been to question our love. Sure, it hurts me to know that you thought me capable of cheating on you. But I can't honestly say if I would have reacted any better to smutty love letters of you to some girl. I'm sorry that I didn't give you the chance to confront me after my engagement to Abraxas. It would have mended some cracks in your heart to know that our love story was real and Walburga a lying bitch. Hell, she stooped that low to fake my script for some smutty love letters and to sabotage some magical pictures? I can't figure out how she knew Tobias. Damn, she must have been following us on our trips to the Muggle world, witnessed your confrontation with him and cast a spell on him. Perhaps, she is even partly responsible for his abusive, magic-hating behavior. I'm so sorry that I have vanished into the Muggle world without a trace. You have to believe me that I have only eloped with Tobias in late September of 1959. I hadn't had some sordid love affair with him before that." She pierced his sapphire eyes with her onyx ones and confessed in a soft tone, "I have been a fool. I should have informed you about my escape into the Muggle world and Walburga's threats on your life. Sure, you were already married to her and she was carrying your child, but you would have had an explanation for my actions."

Eileen stopped here because Orion was x-raying her with a pained expression. "Orion, I'm so sorry for the pain, hurt and worry I caused you with my actions, but I .." She was interrupted by Orion's half-raised hand and swift reply, "Eileen, I'm not angry with you. I'm livid at the wicked dark witch Walburga. I fear that she destroyed your life by casting a spell on this creepy Muggle, although he was a twisted perv on his own without her interference. Damn, she played us good. She forced me into our marriage to conceal the shame of her lovechild and cursed a Muggle to stalk you and lure you into a marriage. I could throttle her." Orion screamed with an enraged face and twisted his hands in a throttling motion. "She forced a mailman's child on you? Sirius isn't your biological son?" Eileen asked shocked.

Orion shook his head and lowered his eyes in defeat. He mumbled in a sad-sounding voice, "No, Sirius isn't my biological son, although I love him as my own. He is the love child of the she-devil and Sebastian Lestrange. She tricked us all with her Fertility Potion. She had been two months pregnant already when she lured me into her bed." Eileen embraced her lost love tightly, squeezed his biceps in a sign of comfort and uttered in a dazed voice, "I'm sorry to hear this, Orion. And I fear that I'm not so much better than Walburga after all." Orion looked confused at her as if she had gone barmy and wanted to dispell her self-loathing with a scathing remark, but she went on before he could interrupt her. "I lied to everyone. The Ministry of Magic, the Muggle authorities, the Hogwarts staff, Severus. I'm so sorry for my actions and wished that I had sent you a Patronus right away after I did the test. But my fears paralyzed me and I didn't want to destroy your little family. Orion, Severus is your biological son. I took a batch of a faulty Contraception Potion and we conceived him in early April of 1959 before our romance went to hell. Can you forgive me for hiding your son, your own flesh and blood, from you for nineteen years, whisking him away into the Muggle world, changing his features with a Glamour and not protecting him good enough of the beatings, bullying, and neglect of his Muggle step-father? Merlin, I'm a monster." Eileen broke down into desperate sobs beside a petrified looking Orion.