CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
"Coming up next, we have a Diva's seven-on-seven tag-team match. But, before we get to that, last night, Booker, the new COO of WWE, Triple H, made an announcement that I don't think DEAR or the Diva's Army are ever going to forget."
"That's right, Cole." Booker T said, sitting up a little straighter as he met Cole's eyes and then looked to the camera. "Triple H came out last night and, well… made a little bit of an announcement for SummerSlam."
The TitanTron then played Triple H's announcement to Trish and the girls of DEAR, before moving to showing Michael Cole and Booker T on commentary.
"I don't know about you, Cole, but I think that DEAR has this in the bag. The girls of DEAR are more experienced with battle royal matches, and they've surely got a strategy of some sort."
"We'll see if they have a strategy tonight, Booker, because we've got our Diva's tag team match, happening up next!"
Seeing as it was a taping, they quickly shifted the cameras to have a better view of the stage, ramp, and ring areas. A few minutes later, everything was set up, and DEAR's theme song began to play through the arena. Lillian Garcia stood in the ring, announcing the match.
"The following is a Diva's seven-on-seven tag team match, scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, being accompanied to the ring by Lita, the team of Trish Stratus, Mickie James, Candice Michelle, Ashley, Victoria, and Gail Kim, the girls of DEAR!"
The seven girls representing DEAR got into the ring, assembling so that they were all around their corner but still inside the ring, as they waited for the Diva's Army to come out.
"And their opponents, the team of Tamina, Natalya, AJ, Kaitlyn, Kennedi Korklan, Veronica, and Michelle McCool, the Diva's Army!"
The instant that the girls were in the ring, they were in each other's faces, with Lita on commentary in ECW's hometown of Philadelphia. The referee separated them quickly, and the match was on, with Tamina starting against Trish.
It was almost completely even between the two girls, fighting back and forth until Trish tagged in Victoria. There, Tamina was almost like Veronica had been in her first match, always knowing what Victoria was going to do next and being able to counter. The only thing was when Victoria went for a kick to the gut, Tamina didn't grab her leg fast enough, and bent over, giving Victoria a way to hit her with a basic DDT. This didn't get Victoria a two-count, even, and while she fought the referee, Tamina tagged in Kennedi.
Kennedi and Victoria thought for a while, Victoria having the muscle advantage while Kennedi had the experience. Veronica had taught all of the girls everything that Victoria did, which finally irritated her to the point where Victoria tagged in Ashley.
Kennedi and Ashley stared off in the ring, trading insults before finally locking up. Kennedi shoved Ashley back onto the floor, and then dug into her with kicks and punches while she was there until the referee pulled her back by the arm, ordering her that she would get disqualified.
"Fine, whatever." Kennedi kicked Ashley in the small of her back and then dragged her, kicking no less, by her legs and back into the Diva's Army's corner.
Kennedi tagged in Natalya from there, who took Ashley and twisted her around into a sharpshooter. Ashley was screaming in pain, and just as she was about to tap, Gail Kim ran into the match and kicked Natalya away from her tag team partner. She dragged Ashley back into the DEAR corner and allowed Ashley a tag to Candice Michelle.
Surprisingly, Candice held her own against Natalya, and when Natalya went for another sharpshooter Candice kicked her back, kipping up. She went diving for the DEAR corner to tag in none other than Gail Kim, who had no worries as she slid through the ropes and circled the ring.
"Oh, Nattie." Gail clicked her tongue as the Diva's Army girls looked a bit confused. Gail wasn't diving in for the lockup, she wasn't trying to fight, she was just circling around the ring, Natalya following suit. "If only you hadn't been so ignorant." Natalya dove in, and Gail jumped out of the way. However, instead of jumping away from the Diva's Army corner, Gail jumped toward it, and Michelle grabbed Gail while Natalya went in, punching and kicking at her until Michelle dropped her at the referee's demands.
"Oh, Gail." Natalya said, grabbing a handful of Gail's hair and pulling her to her knees. "If only you weren't such a bitch."
Gail, who was still kneeling down in front of Natalya, received a kick to the side of her jaw then, and the girls in the Diva's Army corner cheered along with the crowd as Natalya pulled her back up.
"Come on, Gail!" Lita screamed from commentary, while Mickie James held her hand out for a tag. "Get Mickie in, Mickie will demolish them!"
Gail was worn down, her jaw aching, but managed to get Natalya off of her just long enough to crawl and almost make the tag. Almost, as Michelle had been tagged in and ran across the ring to drag Gail back to the center.
Michelle worked in on Gail, and almost got the three-count, before Gail kicked out at two. Michelle went to grab her again, but Gail dove and tagged in Mickie, who rushed Michelle until she was back in the Diva's Army corner.
"Whoa, whoa, Piggy James. I'd calm down if I were you. I'm not a snack."
Mickie shoved Michelle into the turnbuckle, Michelle's eyes widening at the smack, but Mickie didn't bother going further into the corner. None of the girls tagged Michelle, knowing that she had some words for Mickie.
Michelle came back out of the corner with a lunge for Mickie's midsection. Not quite a spear, she took Mickie to the ground and the girls exchanged punches there for a while, Mickie absolutely rabid while Michelle remained mostly calm.
"Get her, Mickie!"
When Mickie went up for the Mickie-DT a moment later, however, Michelle grabbed Mickie in midair and held her over her head before dropping her to the mat. Mickie released her grip around Michelle's neck when she made contact with the mat, and Michelle pulled her back up to hit her with her finishing move while the Diva's Army cheered her on.
"Faithbreaker!" Michael shouted from commentary, while Lita stood up, removing her microphone and running to break up the pin. She missed by only a second, and Michelle was instantly out of the ring, walking backward up the ramp with the rest of the Diva's Army girls while Trish got in front of the other seven girls.
"How could you lose to them again?!" Trish shouted, her back turned to the Diva's Army girls as she screamed. "They are nothing more than a bunch of half-pint bimbos, and all you do is lose to them!"
The Diva's Army laughed as they reached the top of the ramp and assembled on the stage, standing at attention as they waited. Trish was in the middle of screaming about the Diva's Army being losers and how DEAR was supposed to be better than that, when she was interrupted by the sudden playing of saxophone music with guitar and drums behind it.
"Oh, no." Victoria's eyes widened.
"It can't be her."
"Please don't let it be her…" Trish muttered, almost in response to Lita's comment. "Please don't let it be her, please don't let it be her."
Trish turned around, and found herself looking up the ramp to meet eyes with none other than Jazz herself, wearing a Diva's Army T-shirt with sergeant stripes on the sleeves, camouflage shorts, and a drill sergeant's campaign hat. "Oh God!" Trish shouted, falling back onto the mat and beginning to hyperventilate as the DEAR girls knelt down around her.
"Hi, Trish." Jazz smiled as the other girls cracked small smiles, still standing in attention. "At ease!" She turned to the girls as they stood normally, and laughed. "I told you Trish was afraid of me. Carry on."
The girls, who had stopped at attention only for Jazz to enter, turned around and went backstage, Trish still freaking out in the ring as Jazz followed.
"W-What the hell was that?!" Trish screamed in their locker room, her hands in her hair as she sat down on the couch, shaking. "What the fuck is up with that?! What's going on in the world?!"
"Trish, relax!" Ashley called from across the room, running a hand over her hair. "If you don't stop freaking out, I'm going to have a panic attack."
"But it's Jazz, Ashley! You don't understand. She's ruthless, she's aggressive. She's the only woman who could kick my ass to the extent that I-" She looked up, and Lita slapped her, hard, across the face.
"Shut up, Trish! You're hysterical! Snap out of it."
Trish silenced, and the other girls in the room were wide-eyed as they waited for Trish's response. Instead of continuing to freak out, now on Lita, Trish just nodded. "Yes. Of course. We need to snap out of it. That's our problem!" She stood up, her eyes screaming eureka! as she looked around the room. "That's our problem. Girls, if Jazz has been the one training the Diva's Army, we've got to rethink everything we thought we knew. We're not going clubbing tonight. Get a lot of sleep, because we're going to need it in the morning."