Chapter 5: Everything will be all right

"Are you sure you are feeling fine?" I asked Haruna as we were gathering documents scattered around my office floor.

"Yes, Admiral, Haruna is alright!" She responded, showing her dearest admiral her brightest smile, or at least, the brightest smile she could muster. The dark circles under her eyes weren't hiding themselves.

I responded with a weak smile. "Haruna, you were posted to the base the same time I was and have been by my side ever since. I only wish you could be more honest to yourself. I know you are worried for your sisters especially; I am too, and I understand that there is little I can say to put your fears to rest, so why don't we just… talk…"

"Haruna just wants to know, who responsible for fleet planning? Why do our order of battles mirror those used all those years ago? What kind of plan involves making the fleet relive their greatest failures in their past lives?" There was a rising anger in her voice, as if the lid on resentment long-bottled had been removed.

"Haruna, can you keep a secret?"

"Y…y…yes?"

"9 months ago there was an abyssal task force centered around 2 battleships that sortied north from Singapore. The only ships able to respond immediately were Mogami, Mikuma, Suzuya, and Kumano."

"The historical Seventh Cruiser Division," Haruna muttered subconsciously.

"Yes. What normally took a combined fleet centered on both members of the Big 7 fighting under strong air support was done with just 4 cruisers. What's more, CruDiv7 got away without a scratch, and took advantage of the tactical situation to shell installations on the Malayan peninsular. And to top it all off abyssal presence in the region decreased significantly, so much so that the combined armies of Southeast Asia were able to purge all abyssal presence on the entire peninsular south of Kra with only light support. High Command thought it was just a coincidence, but at the same time the Germans were reporting that Bismarck and Prinz Eugen turned a scouting sortie through the Denmark Strait into a week-long killing spree. Meanwhile Warspite, supporting a squadron of destroyers, razed an abyssal enclave so thoroughly that the Norwegian coastline was declared habitable thereafter."

"So…"

"Yes. I was the one who raised the proposal to High Command. I suggested operations around the Solomon Islands to allow us to springboard to Australia and relieve the Sydney bastion, but High Command wanted something grander. They wanted to make a statement to the rest of the world that humanity has regained the upper hand in the war. The liberation of the Philippines has strategic and PR value in that it is a springboard for future pacific operations and that Filipino refugees outnumber Australian refugees."

There was silence after I finished the sentence. Haruna just sat there, quivering ever so slightly. Suddenly she grabbed my lapels and pulled my face close to hers.

"Are…are we just tools to all of you," she asked, her eyes already watering. "Do our feelings not matter? Why did you approve…" was all she got out before the sobbing overtook her.

I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her into an embrace, letting her rest against my shoulder. "I suggested the Solomons because it would have been easier to face your inner demons through reliving the pyrrhic victories first, before moving on to outright defeats. I detailed my reasons as such in my initial report, but it seems to have been overlooked. As for why I did not veto the order, I was afraid I would be relieved of my command; and lose you. Call me selfish, call me shitty, call me whatever for causing so much grief, but I refuse to be separated from this fleet; from this family."

I paused for a while to collect my thoughts. "From my posting I saw the fleet rise from strength to strength and have faith you will all pull through. Leyte, Solomons, wherever the war needs us, we will enter the battle together, and together we will come home."

I started to feel something wet roll down my own cheek. Again, a pregnant pause. The sobbing died down.

"Haruna…Haruna understands why you kept this a secret, and Haruna forgives you on the behalf of the fleet. Haruna just wishes that we knew why earlier."

"I did not want to tell all of you the truth, because I did not want the fleet to dwell on the thought of facing the specter of their combined pasts. You would have all figured it out sooner or later, it is just unfortunate that Leyte let the cat out of the bag."

"Silly Admiral. You should be more honest with yourself too," Haruna said, forcing a smile, as she lifted her head to let her eyes meet mine. "Haruna hopes the war would be over soon, and as long as this new strategy works, Haruna will be alright."

Again, she pulled my face close to hers, and I did not resist as our lips touched. I understand death flags were rising around us, but it didn't matter to us, because we chose to enjoy the moment.

And if Haruna thinks it is alright, then she will make sure everyone is alright.