Part II: My baby left me!

Chapter: Summer heat

Two months it had been, since her heart had been carved out of her chest, and still it hadn't stopped hurting.

Two months, of nothing but pain and heartache, sleepless nights, hidden tears and longing.

It was now the end of July, and the heat in the city of Brussels was unbearable. Margot and Kat had done what they did every day - spent the worst of the afternoon heat underground, either in Margot's apartment or some other part of Europol's paranormal unit, but when the evening came they headed out. The wind was still warm, but no longer unbearable, and the heat that radiated from the cement of the pavement was almost pleasurable by now. The streets of Brussels were full of people, happy tourists and locals, enjoying the beautiful summer night, their cheerful chattering echoing on the narrow streets and cosy restaurants. The air scented of waffles and flowers, dirty sidewalks and french fries, like it always does in Brussels in the summer. It was rather late already, the sun was setting, painting the sky with all the shades of purple and pink, but neither Kat or Margot paid it any attention at all.

On the terrace of 'À la mort subite', two sad figures stared at their Kwak beers.

Margot, wearing a mini skirt and a top with provocatively low neckline, looked remarkably different than just two months ago.

That's what losing your heart does. It changes you.

She had cut her hair, that had formerly reached her back. Now the short, sassy curls reached barely to her jawline, revealing her slender, swan like neck and sharp lines of her jaw. She'd lost weight too, which was obvious in her revealing outfit. She had always been slender, but now she was plain thin - her arms and legs all skin and muscle, her chest flat, almost like the one of a teenage boy.

Kat looked more like herself, in her jeans and her black T-shirt, but her hair had grown longer - much faster than any human's would have, and now it reached her shoulders, as black and shiny as always.

But the most apparent changes weren't the external ones. It was the lack of joy, the missing laughter, the spunk that had been lost in their spirits. Somewhere in Newark they had left their hearts, and what remained, was nothing more than a hollow shell - no matter how hard they both tried to deny it.

This summer had been an eternal nightmare.

The first week or so, Margot had refused to leave her apartment. She'd stopped eating, started drinking the first thing in the morning, and cried all day. But after Kat had finished all the food and Margot all the drinks she'd had stored in her apartment, they'd been forced to leave her rooms. And thus they fell into a pattern, that was repeated almost identical every day.

In the morning Margot went running or hit the gym - worked out so hard, that she tasted blood, and wanted to puke. It worked, kind of - as a way to forget everything, an escape from the agonizing reality. After her workout sessions that lasted from two to four hours, she went to ask her dad, if there was any work for her to do. Which there usually wasn't, (except for target practice or other combat training or tutoring), for just one look at her face told Dr. Heinemann, that she still wasn't fit for field work. And research was certainly something Margot couldn't concentrate on at the moment, her brain occupied with just one thought.

The one she tried her best to escape. John. Always John.

The first thought in her mind in the morning, the last before she fell asleep in the evening.

His name echoed in her footsteps on her morning runs, it was written in the headlines of the newspapers she tried to read, it was the number that called her cellphone, still ten times a day, and she never answered.

John.

And thus, another way to forget - to get waisted.

Enormous amounts of tequila, beer and wine. She and Kat headed out every night, their place of choice usually 'À la mort subite', for it was nearby, it was small and cosy, and they had a vast variety of special beers. They soon became a familiar face in the pub, recognized by the staff so well, that the first beers were brought to their table without even having to ask for them.

Being drunk certainly made the time go faster, but it didn't really help with the forgetting.

John.

Every dark haired guy on the supermarket resembled him, every man wearing a business suit (and there were plenty in Brussels!) seemed to have his face. Every American tourist with the same accent, and Margot's heart skipped a beat.

But it never was him. Never her John, the one who'd taken her heart and burnt it to ashes.

Christ, she missed him so bad, that it was hard to breath! The pain in her chest was like a burning arrowhead, stuck deep in the muscle of her heart, digging it's way deeper and deeper with every beat.

It was even worse now, than it had been last fall - when she'd spent four months moping around her mother's house. It was that much worse now, because she had let herself fall in love, truly to fall in love, to fall deep into Myers' sky blue eyes and his gentle thoughts. She had let herself believe there could be happiness for her, love meant for her, a normal life with a man who'd love her, who'd accept her as she was.

Which had all been a lie.

There is no peace for you, Margot. A voice in the back of her mind mocked. No love. No hope. No life. No rest for the wicked.

"I don't need it." Margot snapped out loud.

"You don't need what?" Kat asked, taking a sip of her beer.

"The only thing I do need is another drink." Margot leaned back on her chair. "And preferably a hot guy to fuck me."

"What?!" Kat seemed shocked. "You serious?"

"Why not?" Margot raised an eyebrow. "I bet John's fucking his little whore as we speak. Why shouldn't I have some fun too? I've asked you to give Jay a call like a dozen times, but you haven't, so I'm checking my options."

"I don't want Jay messing up your head any more than it is." Kat rolled her eyes. "Besides, he's so damn happy all the time, it would drive me nuts."

"Ah, true." Margot sighed. "Well, what about Andu then? He's just as hot, plus he's got the Raistlin effect - dark, gloomy and damaged."

"No way." Kat stated. "You're not going to go through all my brothers. And that's a non negotiable."

"You're an asshat." Margot sighed.

"Come on, that's hardly even a word!"

"It is, I checked it from the dictionary. Apparently it means a person, who's head is-"

"I know what it means." Kat stated, and finished her third beer. "But what's with you tonight. It's not like you to call me names."

"I'm just having a bad day." Margot said in a low voice. "It's been two months now, to the day."

"Oh, yeah." Kat replied, her face darkening. "Crap."

"Feels like a year, though."

"Yeah, it does." Kat said, her voice just as sad as Margot's thoughts.

"So, heard anything from Red?"

"Nothing. But hey, it was him who wanted me gone, so." She shrugged, and then signaled the cute bartender, raising her glass. He replied with a smile, and raised a thumb.

"John called you today?" Kat asked then.

Margot nodded. "12 times. I checked."

"Ever think about answering?"

"I'm not that suicidal. Margot replied.

"Any more letters or presents?"

"No, not since the earrings."

Myers had sent Margot numerous letters and presents during these months. Small notes and postcards that always said: "I'm sorry. Please come back." And small presents too, flowers and such. Margot had just thrown them away, without a moment's hesitation. She'd refused to read the letters, just ripped them to pieces without even opening them.

But then had arrived a beautiful jewelry box, with a silk bow on top of it, and she'd done the mistake of opening it. A breathtakingly gorgeous pair of golden earrings, shaped like hearts, and a note: "I love you. Please, forgive me."

Margot had gone mental. She'd hacked the earrings to pieces with a hammer, ripped the note to atoms and stuffed everything back to the box, sent it back to BPRD with Myers' name on top.

There hadn't been any presents since, but still he kept calling. Every day. And Margot never picked up her phone.

"He's persistent." Kat stated. "You must admit that."

"Yeah. It's bloody annoying."

"Has it ever occurred to you-" But Kat was interrupted by the bartender, who brought them new drinks, a couple of Cherry Mort Subites.

"Ah, merci beaucoup." Margot gave the guy a halfhearted smile, but then turned her attention back at Kat. "You were saying?"

"Have you considered the option that you should hear out what John has to say?"

A piercing pain flashed through Margot's heart. A pain she'd done her best to escape since the moment she'd left him in Brooms Library two months ago.

"No." she tried to sound indifferent. "I mean, what's he gonna say anyways? I know he's sorry, I know he says he loves me. But it's all a lie. If he truly loved me, he wouldn't have stuck his dick in her mouth."

"Yeah, I guess." Kat shrugged, taking a sip of her beer. "It's just…"

"What?"

"Perhaps there was some reason for it. It wasn't like him at all, to cheat on you."

"A reason?" Margot felt her anger stirring, and tried to calm down by gulping her cool beverage. "What reason could there possibly be for him to grab that woman, to push her against the wall and kiss her, like-"

"That's what you saw in his mind?"

"Yeah, I've told you."

"And he seemed willing?"

"God!" Margot exclaimed. "Yeah, alright? He seemed willing when he let her suck his dick! It's not like you can force a guy into that."

"You're probably right." Kat said. "It's just… the more I think about it, the less it makes sense."

"Well, that's because it doesn't make sense. He's a guy and he was thinking with his cock. And that's all there is to it. Nothing he'd say can make it better."

Kat was silent for a few heartbeats, just sipping her beer, and Margot let her thoughts wander. She watched silently as happy people walked past the restaurant, their thoughts all happy and joy, hopes, dreams and wishes - and love. There was so much love in the air on this hot night of July, that it made Margot want to puke.

Never fall in love. Nothing good comes of it.

A couple of guys took a seat on the next table, giving them cunning smiles, and Margot saw just what was in their minds. The other one was checking out Kat, the other one her. Margot answered the smile. The guy wasn't bad looking, not at all actually. He had a nice, lean and toned body, his arms strong and muscular - but not too bulky. His hair was dark brown, and fell to his forehead on a way that made Margot want to run her fingers through it. And he had the nicest eyes - blue, with just a hint of green and grey, surrounded by thick, black lashes.

"I want for that guy to fuck me senseless." Margot sent to Kat. "The dark one."

"Christ, you serious?" Kat asked, likewise telepathically. "You did notice that he looks an awful lot like Myers."

"So what?" Margot shrugged. "He's cute. And he's willing. By the way, the blond one is totally checking you out, and he's liking your boobs a lot."

"Stop reading their minds." Kat replied. "It's tacky."

"I'm gonna ask them over here." Margot said, and turned to smile to the men. She felt excited suddenly, taking a peek of the dark haired guy's mind. Oh yes, he was indeed willing - images of the things he'd like to do to her, filled Margot's mind and she was liking it very much. So what, if he looked like Myers. So what, if she would only use him to make her pain lessen a bit, to steal one night of pleasure imagining she was back in John's arms.

The forgetting wasn't really working for her anyways.

But just then Kat's mobile phone rang, and it caught Margot's attention too.

"Who is it?" she asked. Kat didn't get phone calls that often.

Kat took a look of her phone, her eyes suddenly serious.

"It's professor Broom. I'd better take it."