Sorry about the delay, I have been super busy the past week, and I've struggled a lot with my writing...

I hope you enjoy this chapter, and please leave a review!

Part III: Family Matters

Chapter: Suicide Watch

Kat sat on a chair, by Margot's bed, and gave her an icy stare.

"I get that you're hurt, I get that you're upset and that you feel like shit." she stated. "I get it. And nobody expects you to be just fine right away. But damn, slicing your wrists!? That I don't get."

Margot could not answer. The words felt like burning coals, that got stuck to her throat, and she could not force them out.

No matter how hard she tried not to cry, tears would not stop flowing and moistened her pillow. Locks of her hair got stuck to her sticky cheeks and runny nose, making her look just as miserable as she felt. But apparently Kat's heart wasn't easily softened. Either she didn't notice Margot's tears, or she didn't care. Margot suspected the latter.

"You don't get to kill yourself!" Kat continued her lecture. In her human form, her face was pale, but now there were red spots of anger burning on her cheeks. "You just don't do that shit to your friends and family! Do you have any idea what Myers went through to get you back? What we all did? Jay went to fucking Death to bring you back, and this is how you repay us?!"

"I'm sorry." Margot breathed.

"Well, you damn well should be!"

"Is John… is he mad at me?"

She didn't remember it, but Kat had informed her that Myers had been the one to find her on the bathroom floor - and yeah, she felt bad about it. Not as bad, as she felt about being alive, but still, she saw Kat's point. She knew that what had happened, must've hit John hard.

"He's pissed, and for a reason." Kat replied. "You did a dumb-ass thing, Margot. I'm mad at you too."

A moment of silence, a rather long one.

"So, why did you do it?" Kat's voice was stern. "Now, spit it out, or I'll walk out of that door and I won't ask you again."

The thought of losing Kat felt like losing her heart. Yes, Margot had been prepared to die, but to keep on living, without Kat's friendship - that would be worse than death. Kat was her sister, her heart and her soul. Losing Kat was not an option.

But then again, talking about the things that had happened… Margot wasn't sure she could do it, even if she wanted to. She had done things, that were beyond words.

"You want to have tequila?" she asked, wiping her tears with her sleeve.

"Tequila?" Kat raised an eyebrow. "You serious?"

"Yes. Don't you remember? The one thing that helps with a broken heart."

"Huh." Kat said. "So one of those summers again?"

"You could say so, yeah." Margot sighed. She gathered her strength, and sat up on the bed, leaning on the pillows. "So, Tequila or no tequila? I've got a bottle at..."

She thought of saying 'at home', but suddenly it seemed somehow inappropriate. Did she still have a home? Or had she ruined her right to call it so? The thought pained her beyond words, and she could hardly breath.

Kat gave her a moment to gather herself, before answering.

"I don't think the doctors would approve."

"Fuck the doctors. I hate hospitals anyways."

"Fine." Kat said. "If that'll make you talk."

Fifteen minutes later they were sitting on the couch, of Myers and Margot's living room. They had shared the first glasses in silence, but now Margot was holding the other one in her slightly shaking hands, and it was obvious Kat was waiting for answers.

"Alright. Time to open up." Kat said. "So, what is this about? What happened when you were away?"

Margot glanced at Kat, at her stern face, that told her just, that Kat would accept nothing but the truth. But still she hesitated. It felt horrible to even think about it, not to say it out loud.

"It was me." She finally admitted. "It was me, who killed all those men. Not the Goddess, but me."

"Yeah, we figured that out. So, what else?"

Margot blinked a few times.

"You… you knew?"

"Of course. You were the priestess, and since forever it has been the priestess' job to cut out living hearts. It's hardly ever the Goddess herself, who does the dirty work."

Margot felt suddenly dizzy.

They knew. They had known all along! And still they came to my rescue. Why? They should've killed me. I am the monster, they should've put down.

"Does John know too?" she breathed.

"Sure he does." Kat shrugged. "He's not as stupid as he looks."

"Hey! He doesn't look stupid!"

Kat gave her a glance. "So you do care about him."

Her words actually hurt Margot. She gulped down the other glass of Tequila, feeling it burn all the way down. Her head was beginning to feel the awesome bliss of intoxication.

"You know I do. I love him."

"If you love him, you stop messing his head up, you hear me?" Kat snapped. "He's a good and honest guy, and he doesn't deserve this shit you put him through."

"Yeah, I agree." Margot snorted. "I'm a fricking nutcase. Kat, the Goddess was in my head for two months. I'm… I'm not the person I was. John deserves a life much better, than the one I can give him."

"Then get your shit together, Margot, for it's you he wants! He's chosen to be with you, and you should bloody well respect that."

"I just… God, Kat, I feel like I'm losing my mind. I saw things… in the bathroom."

The memory of the blood, of the heart in the sink, made Margot suddenly nauseous. She put down her glass.

"Then you get help. And you fucking accept the help you're given! You don't start killing yourself, you get it?"

"Yeah, okay, I get it." Margot resigned. "I'm sorry. I just thought…"

"You thought what?"

"That he could never love me after the things I did." she breathed. "That none of you could forgive me."

Kat was silent for a while.

"I don't know about you, but I'm too old to start finding a new best friend. I'd like to keep the one I have. And I don't really give a shit about what you did this summer. It's not important. I just want my friend back. We've been through some shitty times before, and if you let me help you, this is not going to be any different."

"Damn." Margot said. "That was some speech. I think I'm gonna need more Tequila, if you're going to keep that up."

"Don't worry, I won't." Kat said, and stood up. "It's about damn time that you talk with Myers. And I mean, really, really talk with him."

Margot blinked a few times.

She'd have to tell John. And not just about the killings. About everything.

But what would that do to him, she didn't know.

"What if… what if he can't handle it?" she breathed.

"Oh, I think he can." Kat said. "He's your husband, remember? For better, for worse? He said 'I do' to that, and yeah, this is the 'worse' for sure, but he's the kind of guy who keeps his word."

Margot couldn't answer. The memory of their wedding pierced through her heart like a dagger, and she felt tears in her eyes.

John, taking her hand, the look in his eyes when he said 'I do'. The blush on his cheeks, the smile he gave, when it was her turn to say those words.

But the memory was bittersweet. It felt like years had passed since that moment, not just two months. Yes, it had to be longer than that, surely! It had happened a long time ago, to someone else. Margot knew she wasn't the same person anymore. And if John had any reason, he would divorce her.

Maybe he would now.

The thought brought Margot immense fear and sorrow, but she knew it was the probable outcome. For she hadn't told Kat everything. There were… things. Things she would only share with John, for he was the only one who needed to know.

But telling him… just the thought of it twisted Margot's heart. How could she ever force the words out of her mouth? How could he ever forgive her?

She let her fingers trace the white scar on her left wrist.

You should be dead.

Hellboy found Myers in the gym.

The place was otherwise empty, which was good, for there was something unnerving about the way Myers was beating the crap out of a punching bag. It didn't look like a workout, but a full-on assault - like he wanted to kill the thing. His T-shirt was soaked with sweat, that dribbled down his neck, his dark hair a mess, and there was a haunted look in his eyes.

Myers gave Hellboy an angry glance, as he entered the room, but didn't stop the beating he was giving to the poor bag.

"Kat sent you to find me?" he asked in between of two punches. "You my nanny now?"

Hellboy snorted, but didn't answer.

He knew that any wise-ass comment from him now, would no doubt lead into a fight with Myers, and that was the last thing he wanted. Instead he just walked to the weights, and began his usual workout.

It was fine, that Myers needed some space. He was mad, and for a reason.

These two months had been a living Hell for him, Red knew, and yeah, he had been worried for his friend. Myers had barely revealed any emotion, he had been more like a robot than a man, that only kept going for one purpose.

Hellboy had been there for him, as much as he could have. But it wasn't easy to help someone who wouldn't let others see his pain.

Now, glancing at Myers who was aiming fierce karate kicks to a training doll, sweat gluing his shirt to his torso, his mouth turned into a grimace - well, maybe it was a good thing Myers finally blew off some steam.

For some time, Red busied himself with his own workout routine, all the time keeping an eye on Myers. Time passed, a half an hour maybe, and slowly Myers' fierce punches and violent kicks towards the punching bags and the training dolls began to slow down.

"You done?" Hellboy asked, when Myers finally stopped, and began to unfasten his martial arts gloves.

"For now." Myers replied. He was still breathing heavy, his chest heaving.

"Good." Red said. He let the dumbbell fall to the floor. "You want a beer?"

Myers was silent for a few heartbeats, removing his gloves and stuffing them into a training bag, clearly pondering on his answer. But finally he made a small sigh, and shrugged.

"Yeah, sure. Why not?"

"Good decision."

Hellboy always kept beer in his locker in the men's locker room. First, because there were not many things he enjoyed more than a beer after a workout. And second, because this was the one place Kat wouldn't find them. She had a bad habit of trying to make Red drink less beer by drinking them herself.

He took out a couple of cans and tossed one to Myers, who sat down on a bench and opened it.

"So…" Myers said, after the first gulp. "Kat sent you?"

"Doesn't make me your nanny, though." Red replied.

"Yeah, sorry about that. I was… pissed."

"No problem. I get it." Hellboy said, and opened his own beer.

Myers was silent for a while, sipping his beer.

"I should probably get back to hospital." he said finally, looking down at his feet.

"She's not there."

"Huh?" Myers turned to look at him. "They let her go?"

"Nah. Kat took her to your place. Don't worry kid, she's not alone."

"Good." Myers' tone was bitter. "A suicide watch."

Hellboy didn't reply. What was there to say? It sucked big time, that Margot had done that dumb-ass thing, and tried to kill herself. But if he knew Kat at all, there was no way she would let that depressed redhead try that again.

"You know…." Myers said after a short while. "I'm not sure I can take this anymore."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that… that losing her one time, was bad enough. But now I've lost her so many times that I can't even count. I thought I could make her mine by marrying her, to keep her with me, but… but-"

"Yeah?"

"But there is no end to it, is there?" he turned his eyes to Hellboy, the look in them agonized. "We are never going to get our 'happily ever after'. There's always going to be something, a new tragedy, a new horror, something to take her away from me. And one day I might not be able to save her."

Damn, Hellboy hoped Abe was here. He was a talker, he would've known what to say!

"Well." Hellboy shrugged. "You knew from the start, that she was no ordinary girl. And still you hooked up with her."

Myers made a small chuckle. "Yeah, true."

"Come on, Myers. Life with her was always going to be a roller coaster ride. The only question is, do you still love her?"

Myers was silent for a long while, rolling the beer can in his hands.

"You know I do." he finally said, barely audible.

"Then you know what you need to do." Red replied.

Myers nodded, and gave a deep, long sigh. He finished his beer, and tossed the can to trash.

"Thanks for the beer, Red." he said. "And for the talk as well."

"Nah, don't mention it." Hellboy replied. "You going to be okay?"

Myers shrugged. "Well, I'm over wanting to kill everyone I see, so yeah, I guess I'll be alright - in time."

"You know, Myers-" Red said, reaching for the six-pack and taking another beer for Myers. "- it would do you good, to take some time off."

To his surprise, Myers both accepted the beer, and didn't tell him to shut up and sod off.

"Yeah, well…I had thought about it. About taking Margot on our honeymoon, if I ever got her back from the goddess, but now-" he shrugged. "I can't do that, can I? She's in no shape to travel. She needs to see the shrink, and I bet the doctors prescribed her some antidepressants or sedatives or something too."

"Still. You should take her someplace else. It would do you both good." Hellboy stated. "And seeing the doctor is no problem. You know, Kat can get the shrink wherever you are."

Myers looked up from his beer.

"You think she would do that?"

"To help out you guys? Sure."

"That's… actually an idea that might be worth thinking over." Myers stated. "I'll ask Kat, if-"

But just then there was a 'beep', and Myers reached to find his phone from his bag.

"Who is it?" Hellboy asked, noticing Myers' worried expression as he read the text.

"Kat."

"What does she say?"

"See for yourself." Myers tossed the phone to him. "She's a bit bossy."

"At your place with M. Grow a spine and get your ass here." the text said.

Hellboy snorted. "Yeah. She's right though."

"I know." Myers shrugged. "I should get going."

Another 'beep', another message.

"What's that?" Myers asked, as Hellboy was still holding the phone.

"She tells you to bring chocolate."

"Women." Myers sighed and stood up. "Like chocolate's gonna fix everything."

"Hey, you can hope it does!"