Disclaimer: I own neither the series nor the characters.
QqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqvvQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQq
"Hah!"
Uesugi Fuutarou woke with a start, sitting up on the bed. The blanket that laid over him fell to the floor with how suddenly he got up.
Immediately, he knew he wasn't at his own home because there was no way his family could afford a bed or a blanket. There also was no way he'd have a room to himself.
Or could they?
Fuutarou refreshed his memory. The last thing he could remember was learning about his mother's side of the family before trying to escape from that shark-like woman. While it had all been a shock, that a woman who owned a simple café could be part of such a big family, Fuutarou had easily accepted the idea.
At first, he had been okay with getting some help. Anything for his sister after all. But then he learned about exactly what kind of "help" he'd be providing and so decided to bolt it.
He now understood why his mother wanted to cut ties with such people. While money was nice, the tutor would rather be fired then work for people who didn't care for their own family. The type that only reached out when they found a useful tool even after a person had died. It was like the Nakano's only much worse.
He only hoped Raiha was okay.
Also, there was something he was forgetting. Memories that were important to his future yet it felt like his subconscious had locked those away for his own sanity's sake. Odd.
Fuutarou took the time to look into his surroundings, already finding the place oddly familiar.
"It seems that the sleeping beauty has awoken or is it Cinderella now?"
The tutor turned to the sound of the sudden dry voice to see Nakano Maruo in a white lab coat. The man stood over his bed and, for some reason, Fuutarou sensed…blood lust(?!) radiating from behind the man's deadpan expression
Well, that was more or less the norm these days at least.
"Father! Why am I here?" The term got a barely noticeable twitch of the cheek from the doctor. If Fuutarou was in a better state of mind he'd have noticed that movement which was practically equal to the man jumping up and down like the time a young Yotsuba first discovered soda.
He would have also fainted if he realized that the man for once hadn't bothered to correct him.
The bag-eyed man took a seat next to Fuutarou. "Due to my standards as a professional, I'll need to ask if you know why you're here.
"I…" Fuutarou held his head, a sudden migraine building in his head. "I'm not sure."
"I see." The man wrote on his clipboard, completely lackluster. "Then can you tell me about the last thing you remember."
"I was having a talk with…not family, but someone from my mother's side."
"I've heard. The Kuneida's, right?"
Fuutarou blinked. "You knew?"
"Of course, I did. You filed it into your hospital profile when you checked in." The older Nakano actually sighed, sending a more disappointed look than usual "It seems you've gotten yourself caught in something troublesome, Uesugi-kun."
"It's not my fault." Fuutarou immediately shifted the blame. "If anything, I'd rather I never learned about them."
"Indeed. Nothing would come good from those women," Maruo nodded. "Nonetheless, effective today, you are dismissed as my daughters' tutors."
"What? Why?" Fuutarou's eyes widened as his head turned back to the doctor. Although if he was being honest, it wasn't that surprising. It felt like this happened every few weeks even though it should have been almost a year now.
"Why, he asks?" Maruo shook his head. His blank expression betrayed surprise, no, pure lack of belief that the person in front of him could somehow exist. "Do you really expect to continue to be paid after what you have done?"
Fuutarou paused, unsure of what the man meant. Could he think Fuutarou was rich now or that it would get in the ways of his studies? "If you're speaking about the Kuneida family, I never accepted their offer."
"Oh? But that's contrary from what I've heard." The expression on Nakano Maruo's face could only have been classified as a smile and yet there was no way Fuutarou could ever say something that cold and full of malice was one.
The doctor pulled out a phone from his pocket and held it in front of Fuutarou. It didn't look too impressive. In fact, the device looked like it was on its last life, as if it had been thrown to the ground numerous times.
Without another word, he pressed a button.
"Hello, um, tou-san?" A familiar voice came from the phone which had Fuutarou's eyes widen in recognition.
"Itsuki!"
"Ichika-kun, actually."
Fuutarou wanted retort but the voice mail (?) continued.
"So, uh, long story short, I've gotten engaged. I think. You know him. He's our tutor, Uesugi Fuutarou-kun. Just, ah, just wanted to let you know. I'll be handling the marriage and stuff so no need to worry. Yeah. Anyways, talk to you next time. I'll be Uesugi Ichika by then"
There was a beep signaling the end of the mail and for Fuutarou, what felt like the end of his life.
He turned to the stony-faced expression of his apparently once employer. Beads of sweat rolled down his forehead and the back of his neck.
"This…is a joke, right?"
The man said nothing, instead just pressing the button on his phone again.
"Hey Papa! Uesugi Nino here. Guess what? I'm getting married to Fuu-kun! Ah, you know, the tutor you hired. I guess you've become my cupid. Anyways, we're going to have a big ceremony and you're invited. I have to start planning the wedding!"
Fuutarou grimaced, more sweat building on his forehead. Was this some sort of joke from both of them? Also, why was his head hurting so much?
There was another tap.
"Good afternoon, otou-sama. I just wanted to let you to know I'm engaged to Fuutarou, our tutor. How doesn't really matter but just know I want this and I'm happy. The situation itself is a bit unusual but I'll survive. This is Uesugi Miku by the way.
At this point, Fuutarou's teeth were chattering. Was this that April Fool's thing he's heard of? But then the date on the phone had to be wrong. Were they all in on this?
"Yahello, tou-chan! I…IgotmarriedtoUesugisansothankyouforeverything! Y-you don't have to worry about a thing! I-I got this! No worries! I'm doing fine and will be living as Uesugi Yotsuba. Anyways, bye!"
A sharp pain flooded Fuutarou's mind. Hearing Yotsuba's voice was bringing back something. Yotsuba? That was right. It was Yotsuba who started it all. She had kissed him then the rest had followed suit. His memories were blurry, like looking at something underwater. His head drowned from questions he didn't know the answers to and, in fact, he wanted to pass out again from the nausea.
However, there was still one last voice mail.
"Hello? Chinese take-out? Ah wait! Wrong number."
One other last voice mail.
"Otou-san. As, you may have heard from everyone, they all got married to Uesugi-kun. I did as well. I don't think we all fully thought things through but none of us regret this decision. He's helped us time and time again and this is our way to help him. Anyways, if you're going to disinherit us, at least, call in advance so we can adjust the wedding list. Uesugi Itsuki."
When the phone finally went silent, the migraine had passed, his memories had sort of come back and only the cold truth remained. Fuutarou turned to his possibly now father-in-law, visible sweat actually pouring down his face. What exactly did one say in this sort of situation?
Thankfully, for him, the good doctor didn't bother waiting and spoke up first.
"Now that we've caught up, son." The single word sent a cold shiver down Fuutarou's spine that he just knew would never leave. "Why don't we have a polite discussion on what exactly your definition of "finding their dreams" is?"
Fuutarou swore he lost a fifth of his life that day.
If he knew what was to come, he'd have handcuffed himself to that bed and voluntarily given up the remaining four-fifths.
QqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqvvQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQq
"I'd like to officially begin the first ever Uesugi wives meeting."
Clap. Clap. Clap. Clap.
"Ehem! After all…this is still embarrassing." Yotsuba blushed, hiding behind the folder in front of her. "Hey, why do I have to do this?"
"It's because you're the first wife," answered Nino. "If it wasn't for you, none of us would be in this situation.
"To think it was Yotsuba who struck first." Miku bit her thumb's nail. If only she had brought some bread.
"Now, now. We're all here in the end, aren't we?" Already, Ichika was acting as mediator. She didn't really mind as the whole situation has helped with her stress levels. "Yotsuba, why don't you begin with our first topic of discussion?"
"R-right." Yotsuba opened the folder in her hands and took out a piece of paper. She wasn't even sure what it was, just something Itsuki handed her before they began. Holding it in front of her, she read the first item out loud. "First meeting of agenda, when's the wedding date?"
"I'd like to have it at the very least after we graduate," raised Itsuki, chicken in one hand. "Maybe, even three to five years later?"
"I'll second it." Ichika agreed. "I want to continue my acting career. I don't really mind either way but I don't think I can afford to take a break at the moment."
"That's fine," said Nino. "We can save up to have a more extravagant wedding."
"Wait!" Miku raised her hand. "Are we all marrying at the same time?"
All the girls exchanged looks with one another. They hadn't even thought of that.
"A marriage should really be about a bride and a groom."
"That's true, but wouldn't we save more by having it joint?"
"But splitting the expenses would be troublesome."
"I thought those Kuneida people would foot the bill?"
"Only on their side, apparently."
"Okay". Yotsuba clapped her hands to get her sisters' attention. "All those in favor of having it joint?"
Ichika and Miku raised their hands.
"With my schedule, I don't want to have to worry about squeezing myself into five different weddings."
"I don't mind that it's all of us. It's only fair."
Yotsuba nodded, noting it down by drawing a circle in the right top corner and center of the 3x3 grid. It seemed she wouldn't win against the crosses today.
She then turned to the ones who didn't raise their hands. "I'm guessing both of you want it separate?"
"A wife's wedding day should only be about her."
"Five…reception…buffets…"
Seeing that they were deadlocked, Yotsuba tilted her head. If she was being honest, she wouldn't mind either way but that wouldn't solve anything. This first wife thing was hard.
She opened her textbook Putting Those Bitches in Place: A First Wives Guide. "Let's see. If you come up to a deadlock and have no answer…"
It didn't take Yotsuba long to find an example of her problem. Not because of her quick reading or her critical thinking but because it was the first thing written on the first page.
"Right." Yotsuba nodded her head, looked from sister to sister and then declared her thought-out verdict, her first action as first wife. It was now her time to shine as an actual heroine!
"Let's just leave it up to Uesugi-san!"
"That's right!"
"Yeah, let's do that."
"We should've asked him in the first place."
"I trust Fuu-kun to make the right decision."
Well, there's always next time Yotsuba.
"So that concludes our first agenda!" nodded the ribbon wearing quint even though she didn't conclude anything at all. "Let's go to the next one. Let's see the next one is…sharing Uesugi-san. Like who gets to go on dates and stuff. Um, okay, does anyone have any ideas?"
Surprisingly, they all did.
Ichika suggested a rotation system where everyone had their own turn and simply waited for the next person. The problem being if a person took waited for their turn too long leaving the others impatient.
Miku thought of just assigning a girl per day then leaving the weekend up to Fuutarou. While it did seem more organized, not everyone was free on the day they'd have.
Itsuki, unsurprisingly, wanted everyone to be equal. If one person wanted a date, then it can only happen when all of them were there. While it not just combined Ichika's suggestion's problem of having to wait plus losing one-on-one time, the idea of also being able to share one's meals with one another won Itsuki over.
Nino's was simply every woman for herself. While you wouldn't stop anyone, you wouldn't hold back either. It was both the fairest and yet most unfair suggestion yet. That Nino already spent most of her time with him due to their shared jobs was just the icing on the cake.
Yotsuba spoke up last.
"While these are all great suggestions, would Uesugi-san even follow these?"
All the girls turned to each other, and in a way only quintuplets could, all simultaneously titled their heads.
While there was a chance Fuutarou would choose something, there was an even greater chance that the usually insensitive and dense tutor would just do whatever he wanted from making his own schedule or just doing nothing.
And thus, again, it was left up to Fuutarou.
"Okay, finally-"
"Hold on! I'd like to call for a break."
All eyes turned to Itsuki, noticing the plate of cookies saved for after the meeting was already only crumbs.
Before anyone could complain, however, Itsuki held up her phone,
"Otou-san said Uesugi-kun's going here."
QqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqvvQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQq
Uesugi Fuutarou stood in front of death's door, one he had entered and exited numerous times.
When he had finally gotten out of the hospital, he had slunk back to his home only to be betrayed by the person he had trusted the most, his little sister. Apparently, now that he was married, she told him to go live with his wives. The only good thing was apparently his mother's family had sent him money, an allowance, so to speak.
Naturally, he refused to used a single yen of it. However, Fuutarou wasn't stupid enough to return it and instead gave it to his sister. Perhaps now, they could afford a better place, if he really was being kicked out.
And so, with a backpack full of clothes and his toothbrush and dread building in his stomach, he now stood in front of the place he had initially thought to be his shelter but instead turned out to be his execution ground.
Maybe, in the end, it was all just some sort of practical joke. Maybe, the sisters were stupid enough not to realize what being married to him meant? He had overestimated their intelligence a good amount of times to which they had proved him wrong.
"Well, here goes nothing."
He reached towards the door knob and pushed the door open.
On the divide knelt Yotsuba in casual clothes.
"Welcome back, Uesugi-san."
From her left, Ichika appeared in an apron, "Do you want dinner?"
"Dinner!" yelled Itsuki, already sitting down by the table.
From the right, Nino appeared holding a towel. "Do you want a bath?"
"Or perhaps." Yotsuba held a hand in front of her mouth, a sly look in her eyes. "You want me…"
"-ku." Finished Miku, plopping her head on Yotsuba's own and looking straight at Fuutarou, fluttering her eyelashes.
Fuutarou stared.
Miku stared back.
Fuutarou turned around and closed the door behind him. He rubbed his chin wondering if Takeda or Maeda would let him stay at their place. He didn't have too many other options left.
However, before he could take another step, five hands grabbed his shirt and pulled him back into the apartment.
"So, I'm sure you all have something to say and I do to.."
Standing up straight, Fuutarou looked over the girls that he had apparently gotten engaged to. They were all gathered around the table much like a regular tutoring section. All of them looked excited, maybe curious, but Fuutarou knew they all had to get this talk finished first, no matter how much pouting Itsuki did at not being able to eat yet.
The first thing he had to do was to clear up this whole mess.
"Everyone, I'd first like to thank all of you for helping me get out of that mess. I know that you all must have been hesitant to enter an agreement like this but I get it. Money's all that matters in the world and this was the best way to do it."
Miku nudged Ichika as she whispered in praise, "That's my husband."
"Mine too."
Fuutarou ignored them. "I've entered a discussion with your father and we both agreed that we'll hold off this marriage nonsense until you all graduate. That means we're going to ignore this development like Negi ignores Yotsuba's own until you all get out of highschool."
It was either that or the good doctor would kill him. The man made sure to express just how nothing would get is his way from killing the tutor if he dared knock up one of his daughters before they had become independent.
Something Fuutarou wholeheartedly agreed, if only to keep his life at that point in time. He would admit he wasn't ready to be a father of any sort at the moment.
There was a resounding chorus of Boos and When-can-we-eat's but Fuutarou remained steadfast as he held-up both hands.
"Thankfully, the Kuneida family will be in charge of the paperwork but I don't think they'll be paying for the wedding and neither will your father. You've all come a long way to be independent and I will make sure we can support ourselves." Fuutarou nodded before looking over his new wives. "Now, when I say your name, you tell me what you plan to do to in the future."
He raised a finger and pointed.
"Ichika."
"Actress!"
"Good. Itsuki."
"Dinner! And being a teacher but really, the foods definitely cold."
"Just a little longer. Miku."
"I've, um, made some bread?"
"We'll work on it. Nino!"
"You!"
"Try again."
"We could start a restaurant. Maybe, that family of yours could get us some start-up money and…"
"Good! Yotsuba!"
"I'll look over the kids!"
Fuutarou paused, his hand in mid-air. For some reason, he felt sweat down his back as he asked his next question. "…what kinds?"
"Our kids, silly!"
Fuutarou's whole body froze. His brain stopped and, just like that first day, he wondered if he had actually entered another nightmare. He really tried not to show how terrified he was but a small quiver still entered his voice as he spoke up once again.
"Just, how many kids are you expecting…"
"I'd like a big family so maybe three."
"I'm fine with two."
"It's fun having four sisters so I think I want the same."
"We can't feed that many mouths. We would need a large table. I'd like around three too."
"Why won't anyone feed me yet!?"
Fuutarou willed himself to remain calm. There was no way they were all serious. No, they were all just severely underestimating the harsh reality of pregnancy.
That's what he hoped, at least.
Well, there was still one last hope there...
His phone vibrated and Fuutarou took it out to read a message from an unknown number.
Don't even think about using protection. The Kuneida's want that male heir, no matter how many daughters you have to go through.
How they would know Fuutarou didn't want to think about and yet he somehow knew no contraceptives would enter the apartment he stayed at.
A solidary tear may have rolled down his eye at that point but he'd never admit it.
There were only six months left till graduation. All he had to do was to make sure no one got knocked up by then at the minimum and everyone had a job to support a kid at the maximum.
He's spent even a longer amount of time around the sisters and nothing had happened. The only one he was sure to worry of was Nino anyways.
How hard could it be?
"We'll continue this talk later." He finally turned to Itsuki. "What's for dinner anyways?"
Her response was to grab his arm and judo flip him onto the table. Lying on his back, Fuutarou could see the drolling Itsuki with a can of string cheese in one hand while the kther grabbed his collar.
"You."
It was only then Fuutarou noticed the shining eyes on the other sisters, all holding various pieces of food and sauces...yet no plates.
He tried not to shriek as Itsuki ripped off his polo shirt in one impressive feat of hunger fueled power and the other sisters closed in, surrounding his body on the table.
Instead, Uesugi Fuutarou could only pray silently as his true deathbed drew near.
'Mother in heaven, even if this is all your fault, please watch over me."
QqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqvvQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQqQq
AN: Talking from no experience, most harems are just delegations between the wives. What more do you want? They all won so there's no war and since they're all sisters it's not like they're not close with one another.