A/N: Lo and behold a new idea! If you've read my story "Clever Girl" then you already know I've been on an Indominus tear before this, but then I got to thinking; we all know how a godly Naruto can deal with deadly dinosaurs, that's almost too easy. But a regular, average Naruto just starting out of the gate? Now, I don't think that's been done before, neh? So an idea came to me, an idea of the Naruto we know from "Not Going Home" traveling to an alternate universe to visit his past self.
I say ALTERNATE UNIVERSE because as we all know, there are many, many different realms, several in which a single choice, as you'll see in this chapter, can dramatically alter the outcome of any given story. Naruto has literally said before "I don't fuck with time. Last time I did, it gave me AIDS." Implying he's been down this path before. In a sense, one could even call this a pre-sequel to the events of not going home. Try wrapping your minds around that XD
ALSO.
Speaking of that series, a fan of mine, Hail Lord Archanfel, has suggested something.
Subject: Clever Girl
I just had an idea. The Misadventures of Diny and Indy. A story about the girls when Naruto isn't around. It have chapters about Indy trying to get her sister used to everyday things like staying dressed. Or another chapter of them trying to get driver's licenses (Piccolo and Goku style).
And personally, I think it would quite easy for you to accomplish given that you've already gotten their characters made and fleshed out.
Bonus idea: Killa's Grand Day Out. Now...
...here ya be!
I PROUDLY PRESENT a branch off of the much-lauded "Clever Girl" story, otherwise known as...
...NOT SO CLEVER! On another note, a similar scene will of course happen in Clever Girl itself, but not to THIS version of Naruto. To keep things spoiler free, well...it'll make ya smile. Remember, this story is silly, derpy and strange, and not meant to be taken very seriously. It is meant purely as a feel good, fic for all you guys and gals out there. So...
LET THE CHAOS BEGIN! And if any of you have watched Dragon Crisis, well, that series did WONDERS to give me inspiration for this and YES, the Naruto we love from the "Not Going Home" series isn't quite finished with his alternate counterpart just yet...AND WARNING! I unabashedly make fun of Sakura and Sasuke in this chapter! REMEMBER! ALTERNATE! NARUTO! UNIVERSE!
"I'm doomed...
~?
Love
Naruto was dying.
Of.
LAUGHTER!
"BAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"She did it," He guffawed loudly, "She actually did it! She ate the duckbutt! I didn't even have to DO anything! Oh, man, this is priceless! I don't even...!" Wiping a mirthful tear from the corner of his eye, he continued to flail on the ground in a strange sort of seizure that Indy couldn't bring herself to understand. Then again, she realized she had never truly understood her alpha/husband completely, even from those days when she'd been little more than a hatchling herself. Naruto didn't make plans.
He just did things.
Like a dog chasing cars.
Had he a tail, she was sure it would have been wagging.
Yes, she thought to herself watching him laugh, a dog indeed.
A dog that could destroy the car, street, the block it was on, and the entire planet with it! She'd once seen him wipe out an entire universe for what they had done to a little boy. This wasn't someone who made plans of a tangible sort; far from it, he reveled in the chaos he created. With a few changes, an entire world could be thrown off. That was what Naruto did. He was the first stone in a landslide, that loud shout, that triggered an avalanche of white death.
Now he looked all of three seconds from laughing his head off.
"Oh, this is great! Priceless!"
Indy twitched.
"She certainly seems...hungry...was I like that?"
"AYE!" Her husband cackled again, breaking into a renewed set of giggles. "You should have seen yourself at that age! You were a veritable tornado! You ate everything in sight!" Indy felt her face slowly grow hot at the reminder of her own fledgling years, the chaos she had caused, the lives she had consumed...
Her cheeks colored in defiance.
"I-I was not!"
"Totally were." he grinned.
"Libel!"
"Two weeks says she won't snap and kill someone else." Naruto challenged, wiggling a finger. "If she's anything like her mama, she won't be able to resist protecting him, but I don't think she'd kill over it."
Indy scoffed. "She WILL kill, Naruto. That boy is her mate, she just doesn't know it yet. Once she does, she'll kill to keep him. Surely, you must realize that."
"And here I thought my jokes were bad."
Her scowl didn't relent.
"Care to make it a bet?"
"You're on!"
Blue eyes twinkled. "The usual wager, then?"
Indy grinned.
"Definitely."
(Two weeks, three hours and approximately fifteen minutes later...)
Late night descended on Konoha softly, a gentle blanket of stars draping itself across the village.
In the privacy of a posh resort, Indy lay out nude on her bunk, her expression bordering on utter bliss.
Sighing soft moans of contentment, the hybrid quietly indulged in sensations overwhelming her. Her body ached from the altercation they'd had after she'd won the wager, but this was making up for it. In spades. She deserved it. She intended to enjoy every second of it. She smiled over her shoulder at the man giving her such intense, intimate pleasure.
"A little lower, dear."
Naruto sighed, horns bristling, huffing in annoyance as he massaged his lover's aching, tired feet.
"Never betting against you again...
(Meanwhile...)
"Food."
Young Naruto had no way of knowing, it but in that instant he shared in his doppleganger's frustration, head slamming into the wall of his apartment with a dull thud against the plaster. Interestingly enough it cracked and splintered at the touch; another sign of how much his strength had increased since he'd undergone that hellish training in the Forest of Death. Alas, strength was the furthest thing from his mind at the moment as he felt a lithe body pressing up against him.
"How are you still hungry?" he groaned. "You just ate three bloody steaks! At once!"
Her head nuzzled the back of his shoulder, questing for attention like a puppy.
"Food?" she begged, in her lilting voice. "Please?"
Funny how someone with such a limited vocabulary could evoke such an emotional range.
"Alright, alright." he yielded with a sigh, turning to face her. "We'll go hunting."
Her eyes lit up.
"Hunt, hunt, hunt!" It was a chant, delighted and excited.
"Right, now if you could just move...
She didn't budge.
This close he could see how much she'd grown; she resembled more an unruly teenager than a petulant child, and nearly a head taller than before. Wiser, too. The moment he moved she crawled into his lap, laying her head to rest on his chest. Her was suddenly very keenly aware of her, of her breasts pushing against his collarbone in such a way that left him powerless to move.
"Happy." she purred, rubbing her cheek against his. Then she did something strange, something most strange indeed.
She licked him.
YOW!
Naruto shot up with a startled squawk of surprise,
Two weeks, three hours and approximately fifteen minutes had passed since the "disappearance" of one Uchiha Sasuke. Since then Blue had claimed many more meals and, as such, her eyes had begun to change. They were still that vivid, slitted orange, but lately, they'd gained tomoe within them in the past days, including flecks of red and white, three to each eerie orb.
Even Naruto, dense as he was, knew what that meant. Remembered who she had devoured.
There had been an inquiry of course, an investigation, but it hadn't gone anywhere. The "Watcher" as Naruto had come to call the strange, omnipresent entity that delighted in both observing and tormenting them seemed to have taken care of that, as he had before. The village mourned, and some even wanted to blame the "demon" for the absence of their beloved Uchiha, even have Blue breed to pass on what she'd taken, the Sharingan many insisted that she'd stolen, when she'd simply eaten the boy.
He recalled quite vividly what she'd had to say about that...
(Flashback)
Blue hissed.
"No."
It was just a single word, a syllable, but that flat response garnered more attention than anything she'd said all week. Planted firmly on the floor of the Hokage's office she was an immutable pillar, refusing to budge. Ah, but they weren't in trouble he knew, despite a nasty "incident" concerning the unfortunate passing of a certain prick of a Hyuuga who'd stumbled upon them. No one had been able to prove that, either. It was rather difficult to do when the victims were devoured, after all. But this...
...this was a matter most serious, and far more terrifying.
Propped up on a table, flanked by an Anbu at either elbow, he found himself forced to sit helplessly by as an agitated Blue was poked and prodded relentlessly by Danzou and the Hokage's advisors. The Third himself looked rather complacent, a strange, glazed look in those normally kind eyes. Naruto jotted that down in his mind, but even so, the confusion did nothing to lessen the look of anguish in Blue's eyes as Danzou looked at her, peering at the girl as if she were a piece of meat.
"Fascinating," Danzou mused, poking her in the stomach. "Just look at her eyes, Hiruzen. She understands everything we're saying."
"Yes...
Naruto raged quietly What, was he under a genjutsu or something?! Do something, old man!
"Stop touching me." It was a warning, from Blue.
The elder scoffed. "And if I don't?"
It was the wrong thing to say.
The young grl turned her head. The parody of the smile she gave them was eerie and unattractive.
"Then I'll hurt you."
"What are you going to do with her?" Naruto demanded, breaking the tension.
"We're going to start a breeding program with her." Homura admitted frankly.
The boy felt himself go cold.
Breed?
"No." Blue replied simply, eliciting a frown from the latter. "Naruto is mine. Only mine."
Koharu laid a hand on her shoulder.
"You don't have a choice. It is for the good of-
"NO!"
Blue struck, her arm darting out with the speed of a cobra as she latched onto Koharu's throat. Her voice was cut off in midword. Behind his desk, Sarutobi balked. His next words were spoken purely on reflex, and THEY were what sealed his teammate's fate. It was a single word really, and it filled the room with shinobi.
And death.
"Guards!"
Snarling, Blue slammed her elbow up into nearest ninja's face, shattering his nose, then took the second nearest down with a kick to the leg that splintered bone like rotten wood. In the same breath she vaulted onto the table, and those deceptively frail-looking hands closed upon the skulls of two more unfortunate Anbu. Then she squeezed with all of her might. Their heads exploded like overripe grapes, their contents under pressure. Blood spattered in every direction-a fine red mist signalling the end of the elite bodyguards.
Then those eyes swept back to Koharu.
Before she could even register what was happening she was off the table, marching the flailing hag across the room, shoving her roughly against the wall. Koharu's face was bright red; she couldn't draw air at all. She could only gape, wide-eyed, as the young woman who'd sat like a mannequin through the entire discussion erupted into violence. And then she spoke.
"So." it was a hiss. "What, exactly, do you mean to do?! Experiment on me?! Take me away? From my Naruto?! MY NARUTO?!"
It wast the most she'd spoken in a week.
Grasping Koharu's throat with one hand, she lifted the elder a foot off the floor with minimal effort. Still, her mind remained frozen in horror. Her face began to turn blue, her lips drawn back in a grinning rictus, her feet kicking ineffectually against the wall. Blue was throttling her with both hands now, as she gasped and grasped and clawed at her wrists, fighting-struggling-her efforts useless. Do something! Her brain shrilled wildly, but it was no use; with each passing second that vice tightened, fingers like iron digging into her windpipe.
Blue's eyes weren't passive slits anymore. They were wide, all-seeing, enraged, burning. The eyes of a beast, trapped in the body of a girl.
"Oi, stop!" Naruto admonished. "Don't kill her!"
The sound seemed to activate Koharu; she struggled desperately, finally breaking Blue's hold. She fell hard and scrambled to get away but the raptor hybrid pounced on her like a cat toying with a mouse already slated for dinner. Her long legs scissored around Koharu, squeezing the air from her lungs like a boa constrictor as she pinned her shoulders to the floor. Koharu clawed at the tiles in a feeble attempt to escape but Blue never noticed, just kept strangling the life out of her victim until she heard a terrible pop.
Danzou was still edging back towards the door when her claws found his arm and throat.
"You." it was a snarl. "Die."
(End flashback)
And she had.
Somehow, the Hokage hadn't taken action against them, but Naruto knew in his heart that he'd never be a shinobi now. Whatever daze the Third had been trapped in vanished that day, and so too had the boy's dream of becoming Hokage himself.
That particular goal was as beyond his reach as the stars in the sky.
Still, he was content.
It seemed like a lifetime ago, yet still he knew it was as plain as day. Blue was changing. Growing. Becoming more and more fierce, more protective of him. Her undeniable hunger for meat, and seemingly ever-present affection for him-a beacon that all but joined them at the hip. They were connected. Her mind brushed against his almost hourly now-constantly seeking attention, information. Every waking moment a test of will-trying told hold to his sense of self-against a girl who knew only instinct.
In a way, he'd never truly be free from her he knew, but by now, he didn't want to be.
It was strange really, how she'd managed to worm her way into his life like this; without even trying. He was completely, irrevocably hers, and she, his. They'd bonded on an emotional, primal, physical level he couldn't truly comprehend, despite not being...involved with one another. If he concentrated, he could even feel her thoughts. They caressed him now like a gentle breeze, curious and stroking.
'Naruto? Okay?'
Naruto shook his head, sighing.
"I'm fine; I believe, that whatever doesn't kill you makes you...stranger."
'Are we strange, then?"
'Definitely.'
They were a strange pair, alright.
A strange pair indeed.
The scent hit her like a sledgehammer.
'Someone is here.'
Blue sniffed.
The scent of tonight's hunt was still fresh, and her instincts momentarily sated with her hunger. By all rights she should be sound asleep. But this new smell was...potent. It made her sit up in the bed. Her eyes found nothing in the room, nothing but dust and echoes. Yet still, the scent persisted. Calling to her...
...calling...
Casting a longing look at her alpha beside her, she shifted the sheets to cover Naruto better and stepped out, following it. Never did it occur to her to slip on anything but the simply azure nightie she wore. Clothes were strange, and she didn't like to wear the thick, constricting layers. It was still difficult to move properly in this form, but she found it easier with every day...
...so long as she didn't wear all those infernal garments.
She wondered about that.
More and more she favored this fleshly, upright form; because it let her interact with Naruto. Others did not fear this form, unless she attacked. She could hide in this body. Hunt. Nothing suspected her until she struck, and by then, it was usually too late. But tonight, as she slipped through the streets, she found herself nervous. Apprehensive. This strange scent called to her, spoke to a deep, primal place she didn't truly understand, yet she followed it anyway, winding along a weaving path that led her out of the village and into the training grounds.
"Ah," a voice like honey trickled in her ear. "I see you found me,"
The attack came from nowhere all at once; one moment she'd heard the voice, the next, she was spinning away as a silver-haired stranger pounced at her from the forest. Her arm shot up and she felt pain, flinching as clawed hand raked across her forearm. Just like that, they disengaged. Devoid of distractions, she gazed upon her foe, snarling.
"Yes," the words purred again. "That's it!"
Blue frowned, tilting her head.
She knew this one. Her scent was known.
But that didn't make any sense, absolutely none at all...
"Well, well, well!" A new voice chimed. "What have we here?"
Blue twisted her body violently as she leaped, corkscrewing through the air as a new presence made itself known.
A glimpse of red horns flashed before her vision, blue eyes gleaming out at her. That was all she had time for before the other attacked.
Indy struck, her arm darting out with the speed of a cobra as she latched onto the younger girl's throat. Blue's voice was cut off in midword. Slapping the hand away she pinwheeled, an arm scything out, but her foe did the same, blocking her, wrenching her down against the wall. She bared her teeth and thrashed, but to no avail, the intruder was faster. Stronger. And then, impossibly, they smiled.
"Such a fierce girl. My little girl," she cooed, stroking her cheek, "My sweet, baby girl. Mommy loves you. She loves you very much."
Blue's.
Eyes.
Got.
Really.
Big.
...Mommy?"
Blue frowned thoughtfully the next morning, her mind struggling to place the word she'd been taught by the one called Mother.
The strange horned man had told her about, it, too. She liked him. He smelled like Naruto.
"Love."
Rolling it around on her tongue, she said it once, twice, three times. Her finger-capricious things, these human bodies!-twirled clumsily through her shortened hair, the once curtainesque tresses now the shoulder-length locks. Short hair was good. It didn't get in the way when she hunted-FOCUS! Shaking herself mightily, the raptor girl sharpened her focus, refusing to be distracted. That pup had proved a pleasant enough meal, so she should've been able to focus with ease, but somehow the concept eluded her.
Love...who did she love?
"What're you muttering about over there?"
Amber eyes flicked toward Naruto, considering. Her mate. Her everything. Her all. Love. Blue grinned. The blond started slightly as she bolted upright, the motion sending her burgundy-colored dress swirling. In a single bound she reached him, alighting in an effortless crouch before him. Blue eyes bulged as she laughed, bearing row upon row of bright, pearly white teeth.
"LOVE!"
"Hey, what the hell?!"
In the next instant the hapless blond found himself bowled over by the slim form of the hybrid.
Humming softly, Blur buried her head in the crook of his neck.
"Love." it was a purr. "Love Naruto! Love love love!"
Naruto sighed helplessly.
"Hai, hai, I love you, too...
A/N: And there we go! I'm fairly certain no one has tried this angle, but after reading the actual Jurassic World novel, not the junior one, its a piece of crap-I felt kinda bad for ol' Blue. So I decided to give this a go! Hope ya like it!
So...in the Immortal Words of Atlas...
...Review Would Ya Kindly? And of course, enjoy the preview and tell me what ye think! Thar be two and they're utterly hilarious! This story's going to fly off the rails and laugh in canon's face! Its unabashedly oozing fluff and all kinds of sweet, sugary goodness...!
(Preview!)
"Happy."
Blue liked her lips, snatching up a stray droplet of blood with her tongue.
"EH?"
Shaking herself like a wet dog, the young woman fixed him with an adoring smile. She kissed him softly, purring like a contented kitten moments later as she pulled away, grinning. She'd been high as a kite since she'd discovered the human practice; she seemed to take the opportunity to do so whenever she could, much to the dismay of a certain Hyuuga.
Naruto still couldn't fathom why Hinata burst into tears whenever she saw them...eh, must be a girl thing.
"Happy." she shook her head. "Not hungry. Ate something meaty."
"Oh, good, I guess..
Naruto froze.
Sniffed.
Turned.
Slowly.
"Meaty?"
"Yes." Her head bobbed jerkily. "The fat one was delicious."
"DID YOU FREAKIN' EAT CHOJI, OI?!"
Yup, totally went there. Sorry, folks! EVERYONE'S FAIR GAME HERE!
R&R~! =D