Bindings

Deirdre - Gran 757

I shouldn't be here. Well, I was should never be here, should never leave the Spirit Forest… but this time especially, I shouldn't be here. It had been too soon since I last snuck out of the village to get some apples from the castle's tree. But I had to check in on that kind woman. She had been so sad and so scared. I worried for her. So, here I was, sneaking back into Marpha, wondering how I might make sure she was okay. I liked her. She was the first person to talk to me for so long. She even told me stories of her home… what a wonderful place it sounded, and so different from the village and Marpha, the only places I knew. And the only places I would ever see.

When I arrived in Marpha, though, I was surprised. Everyone was cheerful, far more cheerful than I had ever seen. However, It didn't take long to hear why. 'Lord Sigurd' had liberated it from their horrible prince, and now waited for Prince Jamke to convince his father to negotiate for peace. I couldn't help but smile when I heard that, because I knew of him. He was that woman's dear friend, the princely knight in shining armor. I knew he'd come save her. I was sure he had. So, I should probably return, though I did want to actually see her and make sure she was truly okay… Though, I wasn't sure what I could do if she wasn't…

"Well, aren't you a pretty one?" A trio of men suddenly gathered near me. I looked around, wondering who they were talking to. "Say, how about we spend some time together?" one of the trio asked, looking at me. "Well?"

"Um… I would rather not," I replied, confused. Why would they be talking to me? Most ignored me, even here. Marpha knew of the 'rule' about those of the Spirit Forest; it was why I was able to sneak into the castle's grounds. "In fact, I was just leaving…"

"Don't be so stubborn!" One seized my arm and I flinched. They held too hard. I thought I might bruise. "We just want to show you around, have a bit of fun…"

"Please, I really must be going…" I tried to pull away, but I couldn't. I had to get away, though. I had to. I… "I…"

"You won't regret it!" He pulled me close. I closed my eyes and tried harder to pull away. But I couldn't. I was too weak. "I promise!" Someone… please…!

"I think you are doing something you're going to regret." Someone, words long with exasperation, pried the man's hand off my arm easily. When I opened my eyes, I saw whoever it was had even twisted the arm for good measure. "She doesn't want to go," they continued, speaking firmly. "Leave her alone."

"Oh? And who do you think you are?" the man asked with a sneer. I was curious about who had saved me, but they had moved to stand between me and the trio, so all I could see was his back. Strangely, though, I felt… safe. I felt safe for the first time since I left the village. "We saw her first, buddy!"

"Are you two or something?" My savior continued to sound exasperated. "Just go on. I'm tired already."

"You really think you can-!"

"You know; considering their armor and weapons, it's possible they are from Prince Gandolf's army." A new voice chimed in, words filled with careful innocence. I glanced over and saw this speaker was a beautiful woman, with long red hair and green eyes. She had a sad, lonely look to her, a look I knew well. I had that look often when I checked my reflection. Though this woman hid hers far better than me. "I could be wrong, of course, but…" the woman mused. The trio fled as fast as they could, however, and so, she laughed. "Then again, perhaps I'm not."

I breathed a sigh of relief when I realized I was safe, and I wondered if I should stay or if I should leave. I was surprised they came to assist me, since everyone else ignored me as always, so I should thank them. But the encounter reminded me of the dangers of the world, and the dangers of breaking the taboo...

"Are you okay?" However, my savior asked a question, and I knew it would be rude to simply run at that point, so...

"Ah, yes, I am," I whispered, looking up shyly. Then I froze because I found myself staring at the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. They were a striking blue, as blue as the sky above or the dancing waters of the lake where fairies made their home. His gentle smile was as bright and warm as the sun above, as reassuring as light magic. My heart warmed and ached in my chest, and I looked down quickly to hide the blush burning on my cheeks. Based on how he looked, how he acted… there was only one person this man could be… "Thank you very much, Lord Sigurd…" The friend of that wonderfully kind woman… the princely knight in shining armor… this had to be him.

"You know my name?" he asked, his smile softening. He was just as I imagined from the stories, and I… I wanted to see him smile more. I loved how it made his eyes light up. "How?"

"Sigurd, you do realize you're rather distinctive," the beautiful woman noted dryly, giving Lord Sigurd a skeptical look. I noted the lack of title and how comfortable they seemed to be with each other, and thought that they must be a couple. It would make sense. Both were incredibly good-looking, and they had coordinated to save me from those men. "Miss, do you require healing?" Plus, she was equally kind, to ask that question of someone like me. Yes, it made sense, but my heart keened bitterly…

"No, I'm fine," I reassured, making sure to laugh. I hoped it would chase away the strange pain digging deep. "Thank you, though. But I'm afraid I don't know…"

"It's Alicia." She nudged Lord Sigurd's leg, but continued looking at me, even smiling. Two people smiling at me today… I'd never had so many do that before. "You know him already, from town gossip, I guess?"

"No, actually." I shook my head, remembering why I had come to Marpha in the first place. "I talked to this lovely woman with beautiful gold hair and a gentle smile last time I was here. She seemed scared, so I told her my favorite story." So, perhaps, they could tell me… "I came to town to see if she was still okay."

"A woman with…" Lady Alicia's smile warmed, reminding me of the gentle fire that warded away the cold during winter. "That was Lady Aideen. She's safe with us."

"Oh, I'm so glad…" I couldn't help but beam. But with that knowledge… and with this odd pain in my chest… I… "I… should get home in that case, though."

"Would you like me… us… to escort you?" Lord Sigurd offered. He still smiled so softly and kindly, and I worried my face would burn off with how fierce my blush was. "I would hate for you to be accosted again."

"I… um…" I stammered, unable to think coherently. I was tempted. I wanted to spend time with him. I wanted to know him. I wanted… but then I remembered the warnings. The catastrophe that would happen if I… "N-no, I'll be fine! Thank you!" Then I ran. Fled, really. As fast as I could. All the way out of town, despite hearing him call after me. I only stopped when I reached the nearby forest, the prelude trees before the 'proper' Spirit Forest. Once there, I collapsed and tucked myself among the roots of the tree, pressing my hands to my chest to calm my pounding heart. I had no idea if it was pounding because of the run… or because of Lord Sigurd.

I closed my eyes and tried to just… forget. Push it to the side. I knew the rules. I was not allowed to leave the Forest. I was not allowed to fall in love. I was not allowed to be with anyone. I was the cursed child, born because my mother broke the law of the village and left. I shouldn't exist. I did, but I shouldn't. So, I wasn't allowed… I wasn't…

I began crying, pulling my knees into my chest so that I could muffle the sound. Because I wanted to be by his side so badly. I wanted to learn everything about him. I wanted… I wanted… but I couldn't. Besides the fact that he had a lover, a beautiful and kind one… there was the catastrophe. The catastrophe that would shatter the world if I broke the taboo. The world… the gods… they could forgive one transgression. But not two… And I didn't want him to bear that. I didn't want…

This was all so confusing. I felt like I was being strangled by chains. And I had no way out. I just had to stay until I suffocated. Because there was no other choice...

Author's notes: A lot of people requested this one, actually! Sorry it took a bit. But have Deirdre! This is set during Interlude - Marpha of Memoirs of the Holy War.