I woke up to the familiarity of a hospital bed. The bright, cleansing light strained my eyes as I opened them. My head was throbbing and for a moment I was in a state of bliss. I couldn't think of anything, I had no emotion of any kind; just the pain in my head, but that all ended when I saw usagi. the memories came flooding back, along with the feelings of worry and sadness. I sat up in panic looking for izuru but usagi quickly pushed me back down.

"Misaki, izuru is fine. He cracked his head open a little and just needed a few stitches. He's in the kid's room with aiko right now."

I let out a sigh of relief and relaxed a little. The immediate threat was gone, but something still worried me.

"…what about the baby?"

I saw it. Usagi hesitated. That little bit of hesitation in his expression killed me.

"u-usagi, the baby?!"

Usagi smiled and held my hand. It calmed me, but I knew it was a fake smile.

"The baby is fine health wise, there's nothing to worry about."

Liar.

"What do you mean health wise? Is there something wrong with her otherwise?"

Another fake smile.

"No, nothing at all."

Liar

Liar

Liar

"You're lying, aren't you?" I was clam when I said that, at least on the outside. Usagi didn't want to worry me, I knew this much, but I needed to know. Keeping the truth from me wasn't going to keep me from worrying and usagi knew this. With a sigh usagi answered me.

"I talked with the doctor after the ultrasound, while you were unconscious. He said that there was some damage to her head, but it wasn't life threatening from what he could see. He wanted to wait until you woke up to talk to you about an early birth."

My eyes widened at his words.

"…an early birth?"

Usagi nodded and explained.

"The doctor said that it would be better to get her out as soon as possible because the damage she took might end up being worse than what can be seen. He said it would be the best option for her survival."

I looked down at the white sheets that covered my legs. I clenched the sheet into my fists.

I had caused trauma to both of my children because of my negligence.

I'm such a bad father…

I don't deserve them…

I wish she didn't have to see me.

Tears flooded my eyes. They dripped slowly off my nose and onto the sheets. Usagi got up from his chair and hugged me. It was strong and passionate and allowed me to cry in frustration without a care of who saw.

I stopped after a few minutes and wiped the tears away.

I'm not the one who should be crying.

Usagi sat next to me on the bed and messed with my hair.

"hey, why don't I go get izuru so you can see that he's okay."

I smiled sadly and nodded. Usagi walked out of the room and as soon as he left it seemed as though the room became dark. I looked down at my stomach and frowned.

I'm so sorry

I placed a hand on the bulge and let a few more tears fall.

I love you

DADDY!

I looked up to see izuru running to the bed. The room became light again. Izuru jumped into my arms and hugged me with all his might. I hugged back tightly. An actual smile formed on my lips. I was so happy that izuru was okay. I pushed izuru away and looked at my baby's face. He had a nasty purple bruise that spread across the side of his head and near the top of his forehead was a white bandage were the stiches were placed.

My sad expression returned.

I yanked izuru back into a fierce hug and started to cry again.

"Izuru!...*sobs* I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! If only-!"

"It's not daddy's fault. I'm fine see!" izuru pulled away from the hug and spread his arms.

Izuru reminded me a lot of myself. How I always put up a front when I'm hurt. How I choose to make others happy before myself. How I don't want to be a bother to anyone. Izuru, in that moment reminded me of who I am.

I smiled.

"I love you baby bear." Izuru giggled and hugged me again.

"Un, I love daddy too!"

I laughed.

Izuru got off the bed and sat on Usagi's lap. I hadn't noticed, but the doctor had walked in.

"Hello, Mr. Usami I'm Dr. Himori. I spoke with your husband earlier, but I would like to talk with you about your baby. "

I nodded and watched as the doctor took up a seat.

He retold me everything that usagi told me, but hearing it straight from the horse's mouth only made it that much more serious.

"…we wish to have her today, if you are willing…"

Huh?

"…wait, i-is it that serious? Does she really have to come out two months early?"

The doctor crossed his legs and folded his hands together.

"The thing is, Mr. Usami, is that we don't actually know if your daughter is going to be able to make it to her due date. The damage could affect her development and the sooner we get her out and help the better."

I nodded and looked down. This was hard for me, not being able to go full term. I felt like taking her out before she was ready was a terrible thing to do, but in this situation it was like she was a try of cookies in an oven, she was cooking fine until she caught on fire, and now to keep her from being ruined, she had to be taken out, even if she isn't ready. I understood that I had to do this, but I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to see my daughter; I wasn't ready to hold her. I was afraid that I would get postnatal depression because I didn't spend the rest of the two months with her in me.

I was scared

I didn't want this

But…it wasn't for me…it's for her.

"…fine…but doctor, please! Please keep her safe! I don't want to lose her!" the doctor stood up and grabbed my hand.

"Of course. I will do my upmost to bring her into the world safely, I promise you this much."

"Thank you."

With that the doctor left to organize the procedure, and after only an hour I was wheeled away and put under, all for my lovely daughter that would be born soon after.

A/n: I want to know what you guys think will happen in the next chapter! please tell me in the reviews! thank you for reading this chapter and feel free to look at my other stories! please favorite, follow and review!

love,

mousekid!