Thank you all for being so wonderful for that I give you 3 chapters in the course of he next couple days who knows if I get motivated again I'll keep it going..
Ana: Christian and Brian are leaving for Harvard tomorrow, I was supposed to go with them seeing as I still have a couple weeks left before I start school but I decided not to go. Missing Christian is going to be hard enough I don't need the agony of flying on a plane all alone. He isn't happy that I decided not to go but he doesn't understand how hard this is for me especially the fact that everyone thinks we are way to young to be engaged and that we won't last because I'm just a simple high school student and I should enjoy my last year without the complications of a long distance relationship but the truth of the matter is simple I love him I don't care about other guys or dances or any of that other bullshit teenage drama. Christian is my future my life line we will be together again in the fall and will spend the next couple years together and when I'm in my senior year he will rent an apartment and stay in Boston with me until I graduate.
"Hey baby girl what's going on in that head of yours?"
I love my mom she always knows when something is going on with me she's got this insight I can't help but laugh she did give birth to me and raise me for the past 17 years.
"Nothing really Christian is mad at me because I'm not going with him to Harvard tomorrow, I don't think he gets why he just thinks it's to be mean and distance myself from him but that's not even the case it's just too hard to let him go never mind to do it twice then come back and get on a plane I can't be heartbroken and then have to fly for hours back by myself it's too painful knowing he isn't coming back with me and I don't know when I'll see him again" does that make me selfish?
"You listen to me real good okay that boy loves you he worships you he's not angry at you he's mad at himself. He doesn't want to leave you anymore then you do him he thought he had more time and then when you decided not to go he got defensive it's a man thing baby girl you will soon learn the ways"
"Thanks mama love you"
"Love you to baby girl"
I pick up my phone and dial christians number voice mail ugh why won't he pick up he hasn't talked to me in two days this is ridiculous I'm not playing his stupid games. He can be mad all he wants but he's going to talk to me I'm done dealing with this shit. I grab my purse and I head over there Brian and El are out so I know he's alone.
I knock no answer so I grab the spare Key he gave me. I hear voices but I don't see anything so I follow them up into the attic where the guys made there man cave such a stupid thing.
I open the door and What I see looking back at me isn't something I was expecting.
"Care to explain what's going on in here is this the reason I haven't heard from you in two days? well you know what Christian go fuck yourself I'm not playing these games with you anymore here's your ring it obviously doesn't mean anything to you, I was a fool for believing in us and believing in love I do one thing you don't like and you cheat on me with her of all fucking people are you kidding me"
Christian: " Ana what are you doing here?"
"You're joking right I catch you with another girl and that's all you say can think to say to me after ignoring me for two fucking days?"
"Baby I'm sorry this isn't what it looks like"
"Really looks to me like you ignored me for two days and I come over to work it out and you're hanging out with the slut of the school"
"I should go call me later"
she really has the audacity to tell him to call her later well I'm standing right here
"You do see me standing here right he won't be calling you get a single guy there's plenty of them why do you always want the ones who are taking do you have no self respect?"
She just looks at me then leaves but says nothing to me that's what I thought I'm not a hostile person but shit like this pisses me off.
"You need to explain and I don't want any lies or bullshit or I will leave and never look back"
"Ana we were just hanging out we didn't do anything I swear I would never cheat on you,"
"Looks to me like you did whether you had sex or not you were with her all day and you ignored me because I wouldn't travel to Boston with you who does that?"
"I know I'm an ass I'm so sorry please believe me"
"I believe you didn't physically cheat on me but I can't be with someone who chooses to hang around another girl because he is to stubborn to talk to me so instead he screws with my head. I've been in my room crying trying to figure out what I did wrong when you were having fun not giving a shit about your fiancé how can I trust you when you're 3000 miles away from me when you do this shit when your next door. I love you Christian and it hurts to watch you leave never mind feeling that and then having to fly back to Seattle all by myself not knowing when I'll see you again that is why I didn't want to go that is why it breaks my heart and that's why I can't do this anymore it was a nice thought thinking we could work but you're not emotionally stable enough to be with me"
Fuck fuck fuck I love her she can't just leave me why did I ignore her god I'm an idiot and as for savannah I don't want her I don't even know why I had her here she just showed up I let her in and then we just ended up talking all I did was talk about Ana. Truth is I should have just talked to her that's all she wanted was communication how can I fix this I can't lose her I was a selfish asshole who was just hurt she didn't want me anymore god why does she have this effect on me now I have her ring in my hand and her telling me goodbye, No fuck that she can't leave me I have to fix this I will fix this two halves of a whole and I broke her heart I'm an idiot!
"Anastasia baby listen I can't apologize enough I was hurt you didn't want to come with me, I didn't know that's how you were feeling you didn't tell me. I can't help if you don't talk to me you're my world and I thought the worst when you didn't want to come with me. I thought I'd hurt you back and ignore you I'm sorry that was childish and stupid I love you so much please don't give up on us I can't go away and have you not talking to me let me fix this tell me how"
"Okay first I want answers"
"Okay anything I'll tell you anything you want to know"
Why was savannah here? And why didn't you call me why play games your 18 not 12? I can't be with you if you do this shit in Cambridge it isn't fair to me to have to wonder what you're doing when we disagree"
" She showed up and asked if Mia was Home I told her no she asked if she could wait for her here so I let her in and she just started talking to me I talked about you the entire time" and I know god I know I was stupid and childish I'll never do that to you again I was just mad and I didn't want to say something I'd regret later so I ignored you when I should have known you'd be upset I love you beautiful I'm sorry I upset you"
"I love you to Christian but I don't think I should put the ring back on yet we are ok I forgive you but I want this ring back when The Christian who put it on my finger comes back to me"
"Ana I'm right here I love you"
"I know you do that's why I didn't break up with you we are still together but until you realize I'm not going anywhere I can't wear that ring you lost faith in me and us even if it was only a short period of time that's not marriage material, I love you baby when you know that and the Christian who gave me this would never lose faith in us"
"I will get that ring back on your finger you know that right? You are mine and no one else can have you that ring proves to all the fuckers in that school you are my girl"
" I know you will and trust me caveman they all know my heart is yours they have always known two halves of a whole you complete me Christian. You going to school so far away terrifies me I don't want to lose you"
"I am not going anywhere you're my Air my oxygen my life" I Kiss her so deeply so passionately. "mmm baby let me make love to you well know ones home I don't know when I'll see you again or get to have you again?"
"God you're beautiful I'm a luck bastard"
And so we made love for hours I took her in the shower on every surface of this room until she passed out from exhaustion I just needed my Ana fix before I leave for school. I also made a promise to myself. I will get her a better ring and have it back on her finger by Christmas break when I come home.
I have been up for hours just watching Ana sleep our parents came home but Mia covered for us saying Ana was sleeping over they know we have sex but they'd rather pretend we don't and besides my dad thinks I will just get over her well I'm in Cambridge, I feel sorry for him if he really thinks I will ever let her go she's amazing and she forgave me I could never lose her I love her too much it was crazy to think that she would ever leave. I still screwed up she isn't wearing my ring anymore when I put it on her finger she vowed to never take it off but she did but I can't blame her, I lost faith in us I stood up to my dad her dad and my brother for her and not once lost sight of what we had but her telling me she didn't want to come with me these two weeks killed me and made me a fool I could have lost her I almost did lose her. I didn't even tell her the shit savannah said if she knew she'd leave I never did anything with her. I would never touch anyone but Ana she is my everything.
Ana: "Christian stop over thinking and come back to bed"
"I love you Ana I'm going to miss you like crazy"
"I love you to and I know I'll miss you too but we will be okay no one wants this to work more than I do so as long as you communicate with me will be ok"
Christian:"Will you call me everyday and video chat me" I curl up next to her and kiss her and start trailing kisses down her neck mmm baby so beautiful"
"Christian my body is overworked you killed me last night I can't even think of sex right now"
"It's ok baby I will always want you but I don't want to cause you pain"
"So romantic" she giggles
"God this woman was made for me, I sometimes forget how old we actually are it seems so strange to me we have always been friends and last year when she agreed to be with me I was so fucking happy I'm such a girl when it comes to this woman
Later that day!
Brian: " I will miss you pain in the ass you're my favorite person. Ana and you know no matter what I'm here for you I love you baby girl"
"I love you too and I will miss you this isn't fair I'm not just losing my boyfriend I'm losing my big brother too"
"You are not losing us we will be with you just a few thousand miles away"
"yeah whatever lol are you going to say bye to Mia?"
" I owe her a goodbye I still care about her I just don't want to do the long distance thing it's not easy"
"I know but it will be okay"
"Let's go say bye to the our other family and you can see your man before we go"
"Watch him for me he gets in his own head to much just don't tell him I told you just watch him I love him"
" I know he loves you just as much he won't screw up"
"I'm not worried about him screwing up I'm worried about him getting into his own head and sabotaging himself he is his own worst enemy and don't get him drunk or I'll kill you"
"Yes mam he needs to drink Ana he's a college freshmen I'll just make sure he doesn't over do it"
"Fine whatever let's go"
Christian: Brian and Ana are on there way over with her parents to see us off
"Hey Mia you know if you need me I'm only a phone call away and I'll miss your spoiled ass so much love you Mia"
"I'm going to miss you to Christian so much you're my favorite brother don't tell Elliot"
"I won't your secret is safe with me, do me a favor and take care of my girl she's going to be miserable without me and Brian I need you to look out for her and keep the boys away"
"Christian she isn't interested in anyone but you when you going to learn that Ana is beautiful men look at her it happens"
"Why are we talking about me hmm?"
"Hey baby I was just telling Mia to keep the boys away from you when are you going to realize you're it for me I don't care about other boys"
"I know I'm just going to miss you and I won't be here to protect you you're my life"
"I love you call me when you land in Cambridge and take pictures so I can see everything I'll miss you so much"
"I will and I know babe will get through this we belong together and it's going to be hard but it's only for a year" I say as I kiss her and besides I took a billion photos of her that I plan on putting all over my side of the room Brian might kill me"
Brian: I love you Mia I never stopped I'll miss you like crazy but it was best for us to be apart"
"I love you too and I'll miss you and I agree we're not them we are not strong enough I know I'm not I need attention"
"And I hope you find him and he treats you perfectly and I'll kick his ass if he doesn't"
"Thank you and I will kill any girl who plays games with you or hurts you I'm your biggest supporter besides Ana"
Ana:"bye baby, bye Brian I love you guys" I'm just hanging with Mia at the airport we drove them so we could spend time with them before we left. I just watch my life fly away to college I miss him already.
"Don't worry Ana he will be ok he loves you"
"I know Mia I just miss him how am I going to do this"
"We are going to go home and relax by the pool and have a girls weekend and then we can go school shopping"
"Sounds good love you Mia"
"Love you to Ana sisters from separate parents"