CHAPTER 63 – THE ROMANTIC DINNER

Jack knelt on the mattress, handed Elizabeth a glass of sparkling lemon-infused water, and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before returning into the house to get their dinner.

She sighed in pleasure at being pampered, and then smiled as she watched a grey squirrel scamper onto the deck and stop to stare at her.

Cute little thing. Probably wondering why there's a bed on the deck.

I bet it never thought of moving his mate's nest onto a tree branch just so she could see the sunset, she thought smugly. Because that's only what someone really romantic like Jack would think of.

"Do you need me to help, Jack?" Elizabeth called out towards the open door to the house.

"Nope. I got it," Jack replied as he came into view. He approached the bed deftly carrying a tray with two small plates of salad and two larger plates of eggplant parmesan.

"This looks delicious." She balanced the salad plate on her lap while Jack arranged the others next to her. "Yum. Garlic bread."

"With extra dipping sauce. Just the way you like it," he replied. "Darn. Forgot the silverware. I'll be right back."

Elizabeth waited patiently for two seconds before her hunger got the best of her. She picked a piece of broken walnut from atop a spinach leaf, and popped it into her mouth.

"Here, little buddy, you look hungry." She tossed another nut a few feet away.

Elizabeth watched the animal quickly pick up the food and stuff it into its cheeks. She threw it one more nut, and turned her attention to the back door when she heard it open.

"Silverware," Jack proudly announced as he held up napkins, knives, and forks.

He was halfway onto the mattress with the supplies when the sound of doorbell chimes floated from the house.

"Darn, you expecting anyone?"

Elizabeth shook her head. "No. It might be Julie."

"Why?"

Elizabeth shrugged. "I don't know. She likes to show up unannounced."

"If it's Julie, do I have to let her in?" Jack called over his shoulder as he walked back into the house.

"Yes.. . . If it's the Girl Scouts, get more cookies!" she yelled out louder as Jack disappeared back inside.

She hesitated for a moment but then took a bite of spinach and hoped Jack wouldn't notice that she had started without him.

"You're not so shy now, are you?" she spoke out when the squirrel moved closer to the bed. "I guess you want more of my walnuts, huh? Well, two more."

Elizabeth tossed small bits of broken walnut onto a wooden slat of the deck, and turned her attention to the horizon.

The sun was getting closer to setting and she wanted to memorize every detail.

In twenty-four hours, they would be in space. Hurtling through the universe on a transporter. If she ever got homesick over the next two years, she planned to think back to this evening.

The peaceful breeze. The vibrant colors of the sky. The beauty of nature.

The wonderful incredible glorious Earth and everything that made it up.

"It was Mrs. Broud from around the corner," Jack announced when he returned. "She wanted Julie's EC number so she could contact her. And I suspect spy on her a bit. I gave her the public code."

"Probably a good idea we have a neighborhood watch program. It will keep Julie in line."

Elizabeth took her hand and patted the mattress next to her. "Climb in. Let's eat."

"You start. I'll get the baby monitor and check on Acorn one more time."

"Hurry back."

Elizabeth put a forkful of salad into her mouth and savored the taste of the vinaigrette which had a hint of raspberries.

When she re-positioned herself to move her napkin onto her lap, she accidently jostled the plate of eggplant, covered in red sauce, which was on the mattress next to her. A small drop of tomato puree landed on her napkin.

Elizabeth was in the midst of being grateful that it hadn't landed on the white bed sheets, when she saw a movement out of the corner of her eye.

"Look, you've got a friend," she said pleasantly to the squirrel chewing on one walnut which it held in his front paws, while the other nut lay protected near its rear paws.

Elizabeth frowned. "Oh, no. It's not a very friendly friend, is it."

"Not friendly at all."

"Stop it! Scat! Get away from each other!"

She plucked a morsel of food from Jack's salad plate and threw it at the fighting rodents but they ignored her as they wrestled their little bodies, and then the new visiting squirrel began furiously chasing the original one around the deck.

They shrilly chattered their fury at each other over ownership of the nuts.

Elizabeth frantically pushed her back against the pillows, jostling her plate, and watched with wide eyes as one squirrel – quickly chased by the other- leapt onto the covers, sprinted across the mattress, and jumped back down onto the deck.

"Get away! Get off! "

She scowled at the red sauce that had spilt on the covers and wondered if squirrels carry rabies and if they were going to tear each other apart in front of her.

It reminded her of watching a video of the African Savannah where a lion chases down a zebra.

Except this is my backyard and not the woodlands of Africa.

And these are two squirrels. Not large wild beasts.

And they're fighting over nuts which I got on sale at the corner market.

But I still don't want them on my bed!

She wildly jerked her head to the left, the right, and then the left again as the rodents furiously raced around the deck, vaulting off a patio chair, and knocking over a small potted plant.

"Stop it!"

A breeze of wind blew over the mattress, carrying the aroma of the meals through the air and causing the squirrels to do what her words couldn't. They stopped abruptly and faced her.

Almost in unison, like a set of twins, they stood on their hind legs, twitched their small noses, and focused their beady eyes in Elizabeth's direction.

Their quarrel with each other was forgotten as the scent of garlic bread enticed them.

"Why are you staring at me?" she asked warily.

The squirrels seemed to become emboldened by the idea of the bread and scampered closer to the bed before stopping to stare at Elizabeth again.

"What?!"

"What did I do?"

"Stop looking at me!"

"No," she ordered as she raised herself up on her knees, and then began widely wavering her arms. "Don't you even dare think about coming over here!"

A gob-stopped Jack stood on the deck and stared at the bed covers and pillows which were smeared with swaths of red.

"What the hell happened?!"

With his mouth still agape, he stared at Elizabeth''s pajamas which were splattered with the same red sauce. Making the polar bears look like they had been viciously clubbed by hunters.

"They were deranged!"

"Who?!" Jack whipped his head from side to side, taking in an upended chair and overturned plates of food. "Who was deranged?!"

"The squirrels," Elizabeth threw her arms out into the yard, which was now empty of the bread thieves.

A piece of eggplant lay in the grass where it had been discarded by one of the squirrels who discovered it was too big and heavy to continue dragging.

"Squirrels?" Jack asked as if he hadn't heard correctly. He looked around the yard again to see if there was a man with an axe trying to hide behind a bush.

"Squirrels," she repeated. "They stole my garlic bread . . . . and made this mess."

"Squirrels made this mess?"

When Elizabeth nodded meekly, she noticed a blob of red sauce in her wet hair.

She scrunched her face in disgust, removed the splotch, and wiped her hands on her clothes before returning her attention to her disbelieving husband, who was still staring at her in shock.

"How many? Was it EVERY squirrel in Canada?!"

Elizabeth cringed.

"Two," she answered sheepishly.

She bit on her bottom lip and noticed the birdfeeder was still faintly swinging from when one of the squirrels had used it to launch himself onto her mattress while she had pathetically ordered it away.

"Two?"

"Two."

"I was gone four minutes! FOUR MINUTES! I had to change Acorn's diaper. How did TWO small squirrels do this in four minutes?!"

"They were like an evil Chip and Dale!" she yelled in her defense.

"Chip and Dale are chipmunks! Not squirrels."

"Then they were like Attila the Hun and Ghengis Khan!"

Jack raised his eyebrows at her. "Those two lived like 800 years apart from each other. And they were actual humans. Not suburban squirrels."

"They had rabies!"

"Squirrels don't get rabies."

"Stop correcting me!" she wailed pathetically.

"Did you feed them?"

"What?"

"Did you feed them?"

"Why would you ask that?" a guilty Elizabeth responded. How does he know everything?!

"Why aren't you answering me?" he challenged with a knowing look.

Elizabeth suddenly felt nervous under Jack's scrutiny. "Are you interrogating me? Because you're very good at. I can see why you got that promotion."

"I notice you're not answering me."

"What makes you think I would feed them? I don't know why you'd even ask such a silly question. Do I look like someone who would feed deranged rodents?"

The corners of Jack's mouth turned up in a small smile, but he quickly hid it. "If you feed a wild animal it becomes bolder. I am assuming you fed them something and then they came after our dinner."

Jack let out a deep breath when she didn't immediately respond. "I'm waiting."

"Maybe" she guiltily mumbled.

"How many times?" he asked.

"What?"

"How many times did you feed them?"

"Does it make a difference? Because I don't think it does."

"Just curious."

"You are curious about the most unusual things."

"I am."

"Once. Or twice. Maybe four times" she squeaked.

He put a hand to his face and rubbed one of his cheek as he looked at the remains of his perfectly planned evening.

"I – It- They –" Elizabeth stuttered as she too assessed the scene.

"What is that out there?" a stunned Jack asked as he surveyed the lawn. "Is that the eggplant I just made?"

Oh, Gosh. He did put a lot of work into making dinner.

"It's still good!" Elizabeth said hurriedly. She ran down the few steps to the lawn and grabbed the smooshed eggplant slice off the ground.

"See, it's still edible". She held it up for him to see. "Just a bit of grass on it. . . . and some dirt," her voice trailed off as she began wiping the food.

"You have got to be kidding me," he mumbled.

"I'll eat this one! You can have mine!"

Elizabeth hurried back up the deck. "It's yummy. And a little dirt is healthy – I think", she added hesitantly. "And I'm sure the salad is still good!"

"Where is the salad?"

Oh, gosh, I forgot about that.

"Elizabeth, where are our salad plates?" he looked around and then prodded her as he narrowed his eyes.

"Um." She cringed before responding quietly. "Smooshed under the pillows."

When Jack didn't say anything, she made a desperate attempt to take the blame off of her. "You were supposed to hurry back!"

"I was changing a diaper and getting Aaron to fall asleep. I had no idea you were under strategic attack by crazed rodents who have an obsession with Italian food," he said dryly but she was pretty sure she sensed a hint of laughter in his tone.

"I'm sorry," she replied feebly. She lifted a portion of the bed-covers that had landed on the deck and wondered if the red sauce stain would come out if she quickly put it in the wash with some bleach.

Jack shook his head in a mixture of disgust and disbelief. "It looks like you either gave birth in bed or you discovered my mistress in bed waiting for me and killed her."

"You have a mistress?"

"God, I hope not," Jack winced. "Or else she'd be dismembered under the sheets right about now."

Elizabeth giggled and saw the corners of Jack's mouth definitely turn up in a smile.

"It was wild," she eagerly explained. She moved around the deck picking things up and excitedly talking to Jack, who watched his tousled-hair, tomato sauce-splattered wife get dirt on her hands when she moved a flower pot.

He moved closer to her but she didn't seem to even notice as she continued straightening the mess.

"They were cute at first but then started fighting, and I thought they might have rabies. They chased each other into the tree and swung onto the deck – I swear one thought he was Tarzan, and they smelled my food –"

Elizabeth was cut off in mid-sentence by Jack's kiss.

His long passionate kiss that kept going as he lowered her down onto the mattress.

Up Next: Chapter 64

Dear Readers:

A reader asked if I have experience with child psychology after my chapter on the psych eval. I don't have any, but I do like to read and discover new things. But speaking of experience, I do have extensive experience with squirrels this season as they have discovered a new hobby of pelting me with acorns as I try to relax on my deck.

To the reader who reads my story at night before bed, I'm so glad! I love the idea that my story makes you smile at the end of your day.

To the readers who have asked about my other stories, I promise that I'm not done with "Jack's not going anywhere," and "Reversal of Fortune." 😊 I'll get back to them.

To all of you, Thanks for reading, enjoying, laughing, and reviewing.