51
If You Could Turn Back Time
Barry rolled onto his back, rubbing at his eyes. For a moment, for a full blissful moment he was able to lie in peace. Able to believe that everything was going to be okay. Forgot what was going on, planned out a normal day in his head. Getting work done, meeting up with his friends for lunch, working on whatever meta crisis came up, have game night with Iris, Joe, Wally, and Jesse, go home to Cadence and Brady to watch Netflix until they fell asleep on the couch, arms and legs tangled until they moved their separate ways to go to bed.
A smile graced Barry's features, thinking of the night before where they watched the Great British Baking Show with Cadence and Brady continuously complaining to Barry, who would slowly but surely increase the speed on the playback while he then complained that things were moving too slow. Slow to a speedster, that was funny.
He wished he could slow time down. Stay in the moment for hours on end. Keep things from happening. But he could only hold it for so long. Only hold people in his stasis as long as his body could hold up. The tens of thousands of calories couldn't compare to the sheer amount of energy wasted when he ran as fast as he could, when he tried to slow down time as long as he could. Going back in time, creating a time remnant against Zoom, running hard enough for a supersonic punch or to throw out the biggest lightning bolt had nothing on him.
Stopping time?
Reversing it?
That was an entire other thing.
And it wasn't like he was going to be able to go back and time to change anything. Flashpoint was the catalyst for everything and even then, what was he supposed to change? He couldn't go back in time to stop himself from going back in time once more. Even running to the future wouldn't help. If he failed there…he couldn't keep going back and going forward. The time-space continuum would, no doubt, implode. Not to mention the sheer exhaustion that'd befall him.
Sighing, Barry moved his arm behind his head, gently tapping his fingertips against the base of his skull. Tried to keep the headache that was starting to form at bay. A side-effect of the grief he'd kept inside in fear of what would happen to his team if he allowed himself to break down.
It took a second for him to realize Cadence was awake as well. Though she kept her back to him, he noticed her breathing pattern had changed, shoulders shaking lightly. He heard her sniffle and saw her move her hand toward her face and held it there. Whether surprised to find she was crying or couldn't bear to brush the tear away, he wasn't sure.
It'd taken a long time for him to convince her that for that night, their last night, it was a good idea they were all together. "It's risky," she said. "It could be a mistake, we'd be sitting ducks if anything were to happen."
"We all need each other right now," Barry said instead. "Don't push me away. I'm not running this time, I'm not calling the shots. I want us to do this together. As partners."
And she'd looked at him, recalling how they'd argued about Barry's rushing to make decisions that started off everything And she'd nodded and agreed. She didn't have to say it, he knew. She needed it as badly as he did.
Barry rolled on his side. He reached out a hand to place on her arm. She didn't resist his touch, the love language that he preferred to receive as well as give. But when he said her name, filled with the hurt and fear he couldn't quite keep away, "Cade?" he felt her stiffen beneath his hand.
"Don't," Cadence said quickly. If her voice didn't betray her feelings, the way she flipped around, tears drying off her cheeks as the temperature around her increased, and she quickly changed the subject did. "You know what I would love right now?"
A life to live. Tension between their friends to go away. No more anger and frustration. He still couldn't get the voices of Cadence and Ryder snapping at each other like cats and dogs, voices echoing around the Cortex as she demanded to know why he didn't tell her about what had gone on in the doctor's office.
"I was trying to help him," Ryder said, voice almost turning to a snarl. "Don't forget, he's my son, too. And I'll be damned if I'm going to let any of this or what y'all've been working on get to him where I just stand back and do nothing."
"But we would've been able to figure this out faster if you'd just been honest with me," Cadence shot back.
Ryder tilted his head. "Like you've been honest with me about this whole thing?" He gestured around STAR Labs.
"You said you didn't want anything to do with this."
"That was before I knew you were supposed to die and that Brady is being targeted for…for capture. Or whatever it is these people want. Just because I don't have powers, just because I'd rather not be intertwined with all this meta stuff doesn't mean you get to shut me out when something like this is going to affect me."
Barry sat aside, cringing as they argued. Now knowing how it felt when he and Cadence argued in front of everyone, about why they were—or weren't at the time—getting married. Why they suddenly couldn't understand each other. He understood Cadence and Ryder then, they weren't mad at each other, they were mad at the situation and both felt nothing but wanting to do everything they could to protect their son. Still, the news threw Barry off course, much faster and harder than anything he could ever be told.
People around him, people he thought were trying to keep the city safe, were in fact, making it safe. But making it more and more dangerous for those that were metahuman. Starting with children within the city, starting off with his former school was genius, Barry begrudgingly had to admit. It was the state of attack from Tony Woodward, from Grodd, from it seemed that metas were popping out of the woodwork there.
Why not use it as the basis of investigation?
All fight between Barry and Ryder quickly dissipated once they were able to get everything out. But it was just something else that was going to be plaguing Barry's thoughts. What happened if they were able to stop Savitar and Breathtaker, but weren't able to stop the eradication of metahumans throughout the city?
Cadence gently nudged Barry's chest, ruffling the fabric of the gray STAR Labs t-shirt he wore. It gently grazed over his skin, tickling him. Reminded him of where he was in that moment. "Anything you want," he promised.
It was the least he could do.
"Caviar," Cadence said.
She said it so readily that it took Barry a second to realize she was serious. He blinked, pushing himself up on one arm to look down at her. His eyebrows came together, hazel eyes roving over her face, taking in the blue-green ones that twinkled back at him. "Caviar?" He repeated, the single word holding massive amounts of confusion and, equal amusement.
"Yeah," Cadence agreed. She nodded earnestly. Though they were the only ones in the room, she continued to speak softly, her tone matching Barry's. "You haven't lived until you've had some good caviar."
Isn't caviar really expensive? The thought came to Barry's mind before he could stop it. He was sure the horror reigned in his eyes for Cadence chuckled and added quietly, "It costs a lot, but it's so worth it."
Barry lifted an eyebrow. Caviar. Okay. He could do that…if he had any idea where to get caviar. Barry raised a hand, rubbing his palm against his eye. "I don't know any place that's open that'd have it…" he started, glancing around the room, his eyes landing on a photo of himself and Cadence, smiling widely for the camera, arms around each other as they stood on the bridge leading into Central City with the water in the foreground and skyline in the background behind them.
A smile tugged at his lips, remembering that day. It was cold, cold enough that even Cadence was shivering. The two continued to yell at Brady, who was placed to take the picture because he kept insisting the lightning wasn't right and they were moving too much. The picture sitting next to it was the one Barry had taken of Brady after when he wasn't paying attention, sitting on the railing of the bridge, looking towards his feet as he steadied himself. Then a selfie of the three as they made funny faces to the camera.
What seemed like forever ago, which was only a few months, came back full force. Reminding Barry he was about to lose everything. If Cadence did die, then Brady would be going with Ryder and…
No. The word came to Barry's head quicker than the thought of the expensive caviar. He wouldn't allow himself to think like that. Things were going to work out.
Well the caviar was going to work out, especially considering the adorable pout Cadence put on, widening her eyes and sticking out her lower lip to guilt Barry into her wants. "I'll find an assortment," he said, moving to get out of bed. "How hard can it be to find caviar?"
"Well, the Russian Caviar can be a bit difficult stateside, but there's also some really good Beluga Sturgeon which is delicious." Cadence's eyes lit up as she sat up, tucking the blankets down around her lap. "Thank you."
"You're welcome." Barry turned back to the bed and leaned his face close to his fiancée's. His partner's. His best friend's. "Just stay with me, okay?" He murmured. "You're not going anywhere."
"I know." Cadence nodded. But her voice didn't reach the conviction she tried to put into her words.
"We can accomplish a lot in 24 hours."
"I know we can."
"Good." He pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead then kissed her lips. He leaned back, tightening the drawstring of his sweatpants when he stood back. "I'll go find some…" he looked at her funny. "Caviar."
Cadence ticked an eyebrow upwards. "What?"
"Nothing."
"No, what was that look?"
"Nothing." Barry picked up his watch and slid it into his wrist. "It's just…" A grin came to his lips. He tilted his head back, as if working to find the right words on the ceiling. Finally, he leveled his gaze to hers and said, "You can be very spoiled sometimes."
"New flash." Cadence rolled her eyes.
Barry smiled and zipped from the room. In a few minutes, he raced back and forth Central City, crossed over into Keystone, then raced to Massachusetts before arriving back at the loft with as much Caviar as he could carry. "I didn't know there were so many different kinds," he said, presenting them to a very excited fire metahuman.
They ate their—very salty and fishy—breakfast with crackers that Barry had bought as well, speaking quietly through their meal. Speaking of anything and everything but what was to happen that night. Then Cadence left to take Brady to school, giving Barry more than enough time to himself before he needed to be at work.
He raced through a shower before changing clothes and running to the West house. He stepped through the front door, carefully pulling his keys out of the lock, surprised to find the house was already alive, as early as the morning was.
Joe, Iris, and Wally sat around the table, breakfast dishes set aside. Smiles were all on their faces, all having finished laughing about something when Barry arrived. Wally turned when he heard the door open, feet itching to start running, before relaxing when he saw Barry.
"Hey!" Wally beamed.
Iris turned, dark hair flying over her shoulder. She smiled warmly at her friend. "Hey Bare."
"What's up, son?" Joe asked. He nodded towards the dishes. "Have you eaten yet?"
"Of course he has, dad, he's a speedster." Iris rolled her eyes and nudged her brother with her shoulder. "You know all they ever do is run and eat." Barry laughed along with her as she sat in his seat at the table, across from Iris with Joe and Wally at the ends of the table. "I'll get you a plate, Bare." She started to get up.
"No, I can do it," Barry said. He started to get up as well.
Iris, seeming to read the reasoning behind his motion, sent him another warm smile as she held up her hand. "It's alrighty, Barry." And she slipped into the kitchen, the sounds of spoons striking the top of a ceramic plate following soon after.
Barry settled back in his seat and looked toward Joe, whose gaze was lowered to a pistol in his hands. He rubbed a microfiber cloth along the side of the gun, smooth methodical strokes as he did so. Calculated moves that reminded Barry of the numerous times she'd seen Joe in the field. The times he'd seen Joe interrogate criminals that were unable to keep their stories straight—even going so far as to interrogate him and Iris when they tried to keep something from him. How many times had they had to rehearse their alibis point by point only for Joe to sniff things out seconds later.
"What's so funny?" Wally's voice cut through his thoughts.
Barry looked over at Wally then sucked in a startled breath. "Sorry, I didn't realize I was smiling," he apologized. Joe glanced at him.
"Come on." Iris set a full plate in front of Barry before sitting down as well. "Let us in on the joke."
"No, it's just…" Barry thought for a moment. "I was just thinking of how many times that Iris and I tried to keep something form Joe, only for him to find out later."
Joe started to laugh, that deep rumbling laugh that made his lips split into a winning smile. Clearly amused by his own memories. "You mean those flimsy little lies that would fall apart the second I started talking to you?"
"Well, no one can ever say Barry isn't honest," Iris said, an almost begrudging tone to her voice. She rolled her eyes at Wally. "Believe it or not, but the second dad would ask him a question, Barry would sing like a canary."
"I believe it," Wally said.
Barry gave Wally a look that shoed his betrayal as he started to eat the breakfast Iris gave him. He wasn't hungry, the short run not enough to put even a little dent into it his appetite. Iris caught Barry's eye and playfully rolled her eyes once more before looking at her dad.
She watched him for a few moments. "I used to watch you do that as a kid," she murmured. "I thought you were so cool." She then jerked her head towards Barry. "Barry freaked out anytime he saw a gun."
"Yeah…" Barry agreed. "I never liked guns." Hated them, was the better word. Anything that could be used as an obvious weapon to take a life, he detested. He became more than nervous when Joe would dissemble and reassemble the guns in the living room. Even with Iris perched at Joe's side, leaning over to watch his every move while Barry stayed as far away as possible.
It was safe, Joe consistently reassured him. There weren't any bullets in the gun. He always kept them separate. And still Barry hated it. Even sitting next to the empty pistol Joe cleaned, knowing what he was cleaning it for, made Barry shudder.
Joe, on the other hand, simply looked at Iris with a disapproving eyebrow raise. "'What did I tell you? Guns aren't cool, they're just for protection."
"Right," Iris agreed. She and Wally exchanged a look, waiting for Joe to continue. But he kept his head down. Iris looked to Wally once more, who raised his eyebrows. Iris tilted her head. Wally looked to Barry, who smiled in response.
Finally, Wally nodded and sat up, saying, "Dad, look, Ii know this is hard for everyone, but I feel like it's hardest for you."
Barry rolled his eyes.
Iris slapped a hand over her face.
Wally smiled sheepishly when Joe lifted his gaze, but didn't halt his movements. Wally wasn't one who was smooth with words, and Barry, worlds best babbler, couldn't compete. But even he knew how stupid that was.
Iris, hoping to remedy the situation sat up, clasping her hands together. "Dad, can I tell you something?"
"Yep." Joe's response was short. Though it was one word, it said everything Barry needed to know. Joe was getting ready for war, was ready to fight to the death to save his daughter and friends. Iris paused, licking her lips. Joe prompted her to continue. "Go ahead, baby girl."
"When I was sixteen…Barry and I switched rooms…" Iris waited for Joe to stop and look at her. When he did, she kept her eyes on her father. "So that I could sneak out the window past curfew."
Joe burst out laughing while Barry's eyes widened. He hadn't expected that to be what Iris confessed. Telling him that she was the one who took his extra change from the change jar, maybe. She'd cried over the guilt about that for ages, despite Barry putting his own money into the jar so Joe wouldn't notice. He expected her to tell him about how they crashed his car, how her simply words of "he'll neer know" managed to get him to go on a joyride. (They still hadn't fessed up about that). He expected her to tell him about all the parties she threw that he was an unwilling participant of.
But now about changing rooms so she could sneak out. Nervously, knowing he was the accessory to every one of Iris's crimes, Barry glanced at Joe, who continued to laugh.
"Wait a minute," Joe said, finally finding his voice. "You told me that it was because Barry didn't like the noise from the street."
"Well, that was true," Barry said quickly. He didn't like city noises too much. If he could hear all of it, it was too quiet. Just like the quiet that was shattered by his mother's screams as she was stabbed to death. If he ever had a truly silent moment, he'd hear it all again. He still couldn't sleep without a white-noise machine silently playing in the background.
"Yeah, no," Iris quickly let him off the hook. "In my defense, my curfew was 8 pm."
"Yeah, I was a little strict," Joe said.
"A little?" Wally scoffed. "Sounds like you were a prison warden." He seemed to preen like a peacock in that moment. "My mom wasn't strict."
"And look how you turned out," Iris shot back.
"I turned out better than you."
"Tell me, how many speeding tickets do you have now, Mr. Street Racer?"
"Probably more as Kid Flash than I did then."
Barry laughed at Iris's and Wally's bickering. But he watched Joe. Watched as Joe finally sobered and placed the empty—and now sparkling—gun to the table top. Watched as a wistful look came to Joe's eyes. "Well, since we're confessing…" Joe said slowly. "Do you remember when I told you two that we couldn't eat out for a month because I was saving your guys' tuition?"
Barry nodded quietly. He did remember. He remembered because of how often they had to eat out being his fault. As a growing boy, he ate a lot of food, prompting numerous meltdown from Iris who would complain there was nothing in the fridge. But without a lot of money to continuously go to the store, Joe went the cheap route and brought them to numerous all you can eat buffets, police discounted days in restaurants, and copious amounts of Big Belly Burger to make up for it.
"I took some of that money and I went on a Blues Cruise."
Wally burst out laughing while Barry grinned and Iris let out a sound of indignation. Her mouth dropped open and and eyes widened, stuck in a pose between screaming with laughter and screaming in outrage. Barry slumped over the table, resting his forehead against the edge as he worked to stop laughing.
But Joe's wheezing laugh kept him going. Laughter filled the walls of the house, a sound that hadn't been heard there in a while. Finally, Joe regained composure. "Jimmy Walker was playing, and it was just for three days."
"Did you have a good time?" Wally asked.
"With that much money, he better have had a damn good time," Iris declared.
Barry smiled. "Jimmy Walker," he murmured. "Wasn't that…wasn't there one song you sang all the time?"
"You don't remember?" Joe asked.
"I don't remember," Iris declared.
"What Does It Take," Joe said. Then he started singing the song gently. When he finished singing and became melancholy, looking at the three with sadness in his eyes. "I love you all," he said.
Barry quietly nodded, bringing his eyes to the table. Joe had said it many times before, would continue to say it. But how much could he love someone was going to be the cause of his daughter's death?
"I love you, too, dad," Iris said. She reached out, grasping her father's hand in hers, curling her smaller fingers around his larger ones. A child grasping onto their protector with only the pure innocence and love a child could bring. "And Wally." She shifted her gaze to her brother. Then to Barry. "And you, too, Barry."
Barry lifted his chin. He looked Iris in the eye. "Did I lose you?"
It wasn't a simple question; there were multiple meanings behind it. Through all of this, did I lose you as a friend? Did I lose you as a confidant? Did I lose you as a support system? Did I lose you because of what Savitar is going to do? Did I lose you because of all the secrets we've kept? Did I lose you because of how much we've drifted apart?
Did I lose you?
Iris's lips pulled at the corners. Tears came to her eyes. And yet, she still stayed composed.
"Bare, you know that's not possible. Never has been. You haven't lost me." Her eyes shifted. "It's just the opposite, really." She cleared her throat and looked up to him. "Whatever I can do to help. I mean, other than not getting killed." A humorless laugh escaped her lips.
"Yeah, don't go getting yourself killed. Again."
"You jump from a building one time."
"Yeah, and it'll stick with you for life."
Iris smiled. Then it faded. "You haven't lost me," she murmured. "Not after everything we've been through." She looked at him meaningfully, as if there was something else she wanted to say, instead, she fell silent, lowering her gaze.
Silence stretched between the West-Allen family before Joe stirred, stretching his arms. "We have to get to work," he said, motioning to Barry. "And with that story you've got going on, you don't want to miss breaking it," he added to Iris.
"Okay," Iris whispered.
She and Joe stood up, hugging each other tightly. Joe squeezed her, squeezed his eyes shut as well. He buried his face into Iris's hair, knowing what was coming. "I love you, baby."
"I love you, too, dad," Iris replied. She squeezed him once more, gave him a kiss on the cheek, and backed away. She reached over and squeezed Barry's hand before ruffling Wally's hair, making him make a sound of protest and lean out of the way.
"Yeah, and I've got to get going, too," Wally agreed. He got to his feet, motioning over his shoulder. "Jesse and I are going to patrol the city." He turned to Iris. "I can drop you off."
"Please do," Iris replied, holding out her arm. "I need all the time I can get to tweak my article before I submit it to my boss.
"Sounds good." Wally nodded to Barry and turned, zooming out the front door, taking Iris with him.
Joe and Barry stood in the dining room in silence. Barry grasped the back of his chair, drumming his fingertips against the wood. "Joe…" he started.
"No," Joe interrupted. "Barry, don't think you have to apologize. Whatever this thing is that's coming after us. It's not you. You're not doing this. You're not going to kill Iris and…" Tears came to Joe's eyes. "And I'm proud of you for everything you've done. I'm proud of the man you've become." He reached out and cupped Barry's neck in his hand, holding him firmly. "There's nothing you can do that would ever let me lose faith in you okay?"
"Okay," Barry replied.
Joe drew him into a hug. "I know I'm not your father—"
Barry shook his head. "You're as much of a father to me as my dad was, Joe. You know that. I'm always, always going to be your son."
Joe nodded. He pulled back, framing Barry's face in his hands. Forced Barry to look him in the eye. Barry brought up his hands, his shaking hands, and placed them atop of Joe's. "Then bring my girl back." He tabbed Barry with his thumbs. "And bring my boy…my son back, too."
Barry nodded.
It was a hard promise to make.
But he was going to do his best.
Earth-2 Barry turned his face away as a young couple walked through the doors of Jitters, directly to his left. Once he was sure the coast was clear, he brought his hand away from his face. He took off his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose.
Across from him, Burnout lifted an eyebrow as she brought her cup of coffee to her mouth. The steam fogged her face before she lowered it once more and said, "No one's looking at us, Barry. You don't have to worry." She glared when Earth-2 Barry shushed her. "Did you just shush me?"
"I'm sorry," Earth-2 Barry whispered, meaning it. "But we can't risk anything here."
"Oh really? I hadn't noticed."
Earth-2 Barry replaced his glasses, nearly dropping them to the table top. "I can't be the only one who's worried," he said. Lowering his voice, he leaned toward her, studying her face. "We're on a different Earth, where things are literally falling apart. There's not much for us here."
"There's plenty for you here, Barry." Burnout pulled her hair behind her ears, looking at him seriously. "There's not much for me anywhere."
"Burnout…" Earth-2 Barry lifted his gaze to the ceiling when Burnout gave him a pointed look. Oh, right. She didn't want him to call her that. Didn't want him to call her 'Cadence' either. "Catherine." It sounded weird on his lips, but he obliged. "There's plenty for you to have on any Earth you want to go to."
Burnout shook her head. She gathered her hair behind her, brought it back into her ponytail and fastened it. Earth-2 Barry watched as she did so, suddenly feeling a mix of emotions. She looked so normal with her hair pulled back and a pair of glasses on her face. A paper-thin disguise, but it seemed to work as people barely looked at him when he walked the streets of Earth-1. (Despite his worries of going to CC Jitters, where his doppelganger frequented on almost a daily basis).
"You know that's not true," she said, leveling her gaze at him. Burnout laced her fingers together, resting her chin atop of her hands.
"You just need to—"
"—have faith? Believe?"
"Trust me." Earth-2 Barry said. He said it so simply that Burnout's eyebrows furrowed. Her eye shot back and forth, darting over his face as if trying to find a crack in his armor. But Earth-2 Barry continued to look back at her, his eyes wide with earnest behind his glasses. "You just need to trust me."
Burnout slowly started to smile. "I thought I already did, considering you convinced me to come here." She pursed her lips, then tapped her cheek with her fingertip. "And when you said you'd get me out of prison."
Earth-2 Barry's smile faded. Just slightly. "Well, you're not the only one who can't go back home anytime soon."
"If I didn't know any better, Mr. Allen, I'd think you were trying to get me alone."
Earth-2 blushed at the implication that arose in Burnout's voice. He pulled at the collar of his shit and started to respond. "Well, I, uh, that's not, it's not exactly what I was trying t-to do." He cleared his throat, shifting in his seat. "I-I mean, it's, I was j-just trying to help." He blushed harder, his voice cracking at the end of his sentence.
Letting out a quiet, 'whew' Earth-2 Barry picked up his own water—claiming he was too nervous for anything caffeinated—and took a long sip, while Burnout continued to giggle quietly. Earth-2 Barry smiled back.
"I haven't seen you laugh like that in a while," he remarked.
Burnout shrugged. "Not much to laugh at lately."
Reaching out, Earth-2 Barry grasped Burnout's hand. He focused on the warmth that radiated from it and how she didn't pull back from the sign of affection, something she worked to shrug off nearly every other time he tried. "I promise, things are going to be better," he said. "Things are going to work out." Burnout didn't look convinced. Earth-2 Barry brought back his hand and licked his lips. "'Look, I know thing with that Julian guy didn't go over so well—"
"—Yeah, he really seemed to hate you."
"—He hates this Barry, anyway. I can't control that. But I think things are going to work out." He sat back in his seat. "So, instead of sitting back and moping, waiting for whatever's going to happen, I think we should check out the waterfront. Blend in with the crowd."
Burnout nodded slowly. "Stand out by blending in," she mused. "Sounds like a plan. The whole 'what would you do with your last day' sort of thing." She used air quotes around the words. "There's worst ways I could spend my last day."
"It's not your last day," Earth-2 Barry reminded her.
This time when Burnout lifted an eyebrow, a quick jerk of the muscle that shot it upwards, her cup of coffee immediately started to bellow with steam. Of which she didn't pay much attention to despite Earth-2 Barry's gaze continuously drawn to it, wanting to flap a napkin around it.
"Can you promise me that?" She asked.
Earth-2 Barry didn't hesitate. "Promise."
Burnout smiled, the tiniest of smiles, almost as if she'd forgotten how to do it. Then she stood up, dropping some money on the table. Earth-2 Barry stood up as well, making sure his glasses were set firmly on his face and followed her out of the restaurant.
The two headed down the street before blending in with the crowd of citizens. Those that may be the exact doppelgangers of those they knew on their Earth. Those that didn't look their way, that didn't shout a warning, but made them feel as if they were at peace.
Probably for the last time.
Earth-2 Barry's hand twitched at his side as they went along. He stretched it out for a second, paused, then brought his hand back to his side, clenching his hand into a fist. Burnout reached out and grasped his hand, pulling him forward as she did so. She wedged her fingers between his and leaned into his side, resting her head on his shoulder.
Earth-2 Barry smiled, leaning back into her embrace. Whether it was to keep up appearances, to appear that they truly were Barry and Cadence, Earth-2 Barry didn't care. To everyone else, they were pretending to be other people.
To them, it was real.
Brady sighed as he rested his chin in his hands. He leaned back in his seat, leaned forward to rest his chin on his desk, then dropped his head. His teacher droned on and on. Brady had no idea what was being said, had no reason to care.
Who could care about something like that when it was only hours before his life was going to completely change. Hours before he'd lose the one thing he loved the most. Hours before he lost his mom.
Brady closed his eyes, forcing back the tears that came to him. He had ot be strong. Couldn't have people look at him and ask questions and wonder. What would he say anyway? A homicidal maniac who had the face of his future step-father was going to kill his mother by midnight that night? And not just him, but Iris and another one of his friends as well?
Who would believe him?
Who would believe him and not think it was a good idea to send him to the loony bin. He knew what happened to people like that. His mom had told him stories about working in the hospital, how there was a floor for people who weren't mentally healthy. How there were people who came in, screaming of voices in their heads, of bugs crawling all over them, of the voices telling them to do something evil.
He couldn't end up like that.
But...it didn't look like there was anything anyone could do to fix things. To change things. The only thing that could work…was a crapshoot of a plan. A plan that had a 50/50 chance of working out. A plan that Brady didn't have any faith in.
But he had to be strong. He couldn't let his mom see how upset he was. Couldn't let her worry about him during her last few hours of her last day. So he put on a brave face and said he'd go to school that day. He held his head high, gave her an extra tight hug once she dropped him off, and went inside without looking back.
If he had, he would've seen his mother start to cry, would've been in hysterics himself. Would've been so inconsolable that, well, he may as well have been in Pre-School again. The first day where he kicked and screamed for his mother, wanting her back as she walked away to finish her own schooling for the day. The day after he was just fine, because she came back for him once school ended.
Would she come back for him that night?
Panic arose in Brady's chest as he walked into school that morning. The question stuck in his mind. Was she really going to come back? With each step he took toward his locker, the panic grew and grew, until it became so big that he wanted to turn on his heel, throw off his backpack, and race after his mom, screaming her name the way whole. That he wanted nothing more than to rip into his skin, tearing it off in clumps as he screamed and screamed, working to get the darkness out of him.
But he kept calm. Leah looked at him with saddened eyes as he arrived that morning, the only person in his school life who knew what was going on. Alicia, unknowing of the plight in his personal life, simply looked at him with a small sneer as she asked, "What happened to you? You look terrible."
The blunt comment, which would've otherwise ticked him off to no end, made Brady laugh. It relieved some of the pressure building within him, but not enough to keep it at bay. When he walked from class to class was when it came back. When in class; PE, science, math, he had something to distract him.
The end of the school day wasn't that.
So much so that when the final bell rang, he jumped a mile in his seat, unsure if it was a bell or if it was the sound of the page from the principal's office.
Ding-Dong.
Baden Nash, please report to the principal's office. We have some bad news for you.
But it didn't come. The day was uneventful. Leah grasped Brady's shoulder and squeezed it tightly as he moved to leave their last class for the day. She stood by him, looking at him curiously and asked, "Do you want me to come?"
A simple question. Did he want her to walk him home? To keep him company? They were a team, they should be there for each other. And he did truly believe that, as much as it would've made him snort and roll his eyes at the very beginning. He'd seen how many times Cadence had to remind Barry, "I'm your partner, not your sidekick," whenever he would try to tell her what to do.
Even if it was for her own good, Brady thought. He shuffled his feet beneath him as he walked towards his home, having bid farewell to Leah and Alicia—who was uncharacteristically quiet, watching him closely—ages ago when he left school. Would easily get there faster by using the city bus or even by phasing but wanted to draw out the time. A long walk that'd give him time to think. He was just trying to keep her safe.
They always tried to keep each other safe. Brady had never seen Barry or Cadence angrier than when each other was hurt. Not even when Barry was pissed at Cadence for betraying him from working with the Assassination Bureau to try and kill him, was he as angry as when she was hurt.
Just like she'd become whenever Brady was hurt or suffering some sort of injustice. Mama Bear's had nothing on his mom. Brady looked up as a shadow covered him, surprised to find that he'd made his way to STAR Labs quicker than he'd thought. He was so deep in thought, that he barely noticed when he arrived home until he was walking through the door.
He closed the door quietly behind him, heading toward the living room. Slowing when he heard the hushed voices of his mom and Barry speaking.
"I just don't think it's a good idea," his mom was saying.
Brady knew, without looking at her, that she was trying to keep up a brave face. But he knew his mother, knew form the way her shoulders slumped, form the way her words were clipped, that she was second away from bursting out into hysterical tears.
Tears he knew he wouldn't be able to make go away with a silly joke or a silly dance that'd have her rolling on the floor before. Those were bad days. That night was to be devastating. Two different mediums that, he, as a child, sort of understood and sort of didn't.
Death was a hard thing to handle, he still wasn't over his grandfather's death. But he had to be strong then, too. Took over cooking so that he was sure his mother ate. He poked his head into her room to be sure she was sleeping well, often climbing into her bed to cuddle with her when she wasn't, in fact, okay.
"It's not for us, Cade," Barry said as Brady cooked off his shoes. "It's for everyone else. In case questions are asked."
"Well, I'd just as soon keep my mom from having a heart attack over this," Cadence said. She sighed heavily. "There's still a lot of things I haven't told her about what I've been up to here in Central City."
"I know," Barry said gently. Brady craned his neck, trying to see what Barry was moving closer to his mom, then frowned when he saw it was her cell phone turned on to video. "But, like I said, there's going to be questions. And we really need to think about the future, after all this is over."
Cadence smiled wryly, watching as Barry held his own phone in front of his face. "What happened to your everlasting source of hope?"
Barry was silent for a long moment. Pensive, worked to figure out the best words to say. "I still have hope," he murmured. "Hope that things are going to go well. Hope that I can keep my promises. But I can't leave everyone without some sort of message."
Cadence's smile widened. "That's one of the things I love about you, Barry Allen. That you always care about everyone around you."
Barry smiled back. It lasted for a moment before he became serious once more. "We need to do this," He took a deep breath and started his recording. "My name is Barry Allen and I'm the fastest man alive. To the outside world I'm an ordinary forensic scientist, but secretly with the help of my friends at STAR Labs I fight crime and find other metahumans like me. After defeating Zoom and defending the multiverse, I ran back in time and created the alternate timeline Flashpoint. I restored the timeline to how it was only to find it wasn't as I left them, I brought new threats to our world, and I saw Savitar murder the woman that I love. I won't let that happen. i'm going to do everything in my power to change what I've done wrong. I'm the only one fast enough to do it. I am The Flash."
He turned off his video and waited for Cadence to start hers. For a long moment, she tapped her phone against her thigh. Then, finally, she moved to record her part. She took a deep breath, sighed, thought for a moment then started. "My name is Cadence Nash and I'm a fire metahuman. Years ago, I did some terrible things, things that I was brainwashed into doing and things I did all on my own. To help me and my son survive. The Assassination Bureau controlled my life until I was able to break free. Since then, I've tried to atone for everything that I've done with them, working with The Flash to right the wrongs in Central City and protect those that are powerless to protect themselves. And I won't stop until everyone is safe. I am Flare."
Cadence lowered the phone to her lap and leaned into Barry, curling up into his side. Barry wrapped his arm around her, resting his chin atop her head, looking nowhere. Normally, Brady would've teased them to 'get a room', rolled his eyes, or left the room so that he could give them some privacy. His mom had someone he loved, someone who wanted him as well, it was all he wanted. Private moments were private moments.
But Brady needed comfort, too.
He wasn't too old for it, yet.
Tentatively, he moved closer to the couch. "Mom?" He asked.
Startled, Barry and Cadence whirled around. Cadence's eyes bounced from her son, to the time on her phone, to her son once more. Her eyes widened, almost as if she'd seen a ghost. Her lips parted and she looked away once more, keeping her gaze lowered. Finally, she cleared her throat and looked him in the eye. "Brady, what are you doing here?" She asked, concern marring her face as he moved around the couch to sit next to her. "You're supposed to be at lacrosse practice."
"I didn't go."
Way to state the obvious, he thought, seconds later. Brady sat down next to her, letting himself remember the feel of her hand as it moved through his hair, a gentle and soothing motion she'd done since he was a baby. A funny story told by her, where she would pet his head, then stop, and he'd look at her before grabbing her hand and moving it to pet his head again.
He needed it now.
"What's up, bud?" Cadence asked, her eyes boring through his. What a stupid question. She and Brady exchanged identical smirks, knowing they were thinking the same thing. Behind them, Barry chuckled to himself. A bystander to the moment between mother and son, despite being part of their family.
Brady looked down at the ring that sat on his mother's finger. Smiled a little. He lifted his chin and looked his mother in the eye to ask, "Will you tell me the story again?"
"What story?" Cadence blinked in surprise.
A patient sigh escaped Brady's nose. "You know," he pressed. "The story of when you found out you were pregnant with me. The story of when I was born. Tell me again."
A small, warm smile came to Cadence's face. She ran her hands down the sides of Brady's face. "You know the story, bud." Suddenly, her breath caught in her throat, hitched to hold back a sob. "I've told it to you a million times."
"I know. I want to hear it again." He leaned toward her. "From the beginning. And don't forget the part where you said that Mamaw fainted."
Cadence rolled her eyes. "Mom's always been overly dramatic."
"She fainted?" Barry asked.
"Only because she wouldn't listen when they said not to put her head behind the curtain to see when Brady was coming out," Cadence explained. She gestured with her hands. "And there was his head just poking out and looking at the world and my mom screamed and passed out." She shook her head. "I told the doctors I didn't want her in the room."
Brady smiled and laughed. "Yeah. Start from the beginning." Cadence sighed and looked away. Brady took the opportunity and leaned against her, pressing his face against hers. He gently rubbed his face against hers, like he used to do. A habit he'd grown out of shortly after meeting Barry and the others. "Please, mom?" he murmured.
Cadence smiled, laughing quietly. She leaned back, studying Brady's face for a long time. Long enough for Brady to squirm uncomfortably. He turned his head away, suddenly feeling uncomfortable under her gaze. He looked at her out the corner of his eye. "What?" he asked.
"Just trying to remember," Cadence replied. "I don't ever want to forget your face."
Brady's eyes widened and his shifted his gaze to Barry, who continued to sit quietly behind her. He sat, hovered in a crouch, looking like he was about to lay and egg, stuck between getting up to give them some privacy or to stay as part of the conversation.
At that moment, everything happened at once.
There was a knock on the door to the apartment. It slowly cracked open with Leah popping her head in, calling "hello," quietly.
At the same time, the windows across the loft exploded in a shower of glass, lightning streaking around the room. White light zipped back and forth. First, it raced to the door, whisking Leah out of sight as she screamed. Then it came back and grabbed Cadence, who cried out as she was taken away. Brady saw Barry for a split second. Long enough to blink. Then Barry was gone as well. Brady didn't get the chance to even breathe before he was grabbed by the back of his shirt and hefted through the air.
The world warped around him, lights of the city streaking by. Buildings whizzing at such a high speed that he couldn't tell which way was up. Then everything went black, the lights shut off and he was flying, without the grasp behind him. He flew through the air and crashed into a solid wall, falling straight to the ground.
The only thing he heard, before falling unconscious was the sound of a door clanging shut.
"Oh, Cisco." The sing-song voice reached Cisco's ears. He twitched, lying quietly on the ground. Then he heard it again. "Cisco, wake up."
Cisco's eyes fluttered. He opened his eyes and found nothing but darkness around him. For a moment, he wondered if the lights in the Cortex had gone out again. If there had been a security breach. It didn't take long for him to realize he no longer was in STAR Labs. That he wasn't working on the Speed Force Bazooka. That he didn't have a steaming plate of pizza pockets sitting beside him.
No, he was lying on a concrete floor. A cold concrete floor where the dark, damp cold seeped in through his clothes. Pressing his hands against the ground, Cisco pushed himself to his knees. He sucked in a deep breath then coughed, mouth dry. He licked his lips, swallowed his spit, worked to get feeling back in his mouth.
"Cisco."
Cisco whipped his head to the side. Stared in surprise as Killer Frost looked back at him through the bars that separated the two. His heart sank. In a cell, once again. "At least it's not the Pipeline," he murmured, knowing there was a good chance he'd still be able to use his powers if he weren't near any meta dampening measures.
"Yes, at least it's not your personal prison," Killer Frost agreed. She smiled, showing her teeth. "Try to use your powers," she taunted. "I dare you."
Cisco merely looked back at her. Looked back at the face of the woman he cared deeply for. Took in the white hair and blue lipstick, blue eyeshadow that all seemed to form the second Killer Frost took over Caitlin's form. He strained to see the friend he'd known for years inside her.
"Poor Cisco," Killer Frost teased. She tilted her head and backed away from the bars. Moved further into the room that sat outside the cell he was being held in. Started to pace.
"Caitlin," Cisco called. He shakily got to his feet and grabbed the bars like she'd done before. "This isn't you. You don't want to do this."
Killer Frost shook her head. "I should've known it'd take you forever to understand this." Killer Ffrost waved a hand up an down her body. "I'm not Caitlin, Cisco! I'm Killer Frost. Caitlin doesn't exist anymore. And the sooner you get that through your head, the better off you'll be."
"Unlike you, I can't turn my back on the people I love because of something they can't control," Cisco declared.
"Who says she can't control it?" Killer Frost whispered. "Who says this whole time she hadn't been able to control what's she's done and enjoyed it. Enjoyed hurting you and watching the poor, pathetic faces on your faces." She wiggled her fingers. "Savitar was right. In order to join him as a God, I have to cure myself of Caitlin. This has to happen." Killer Frost looked aside as there was a bright flash of light that stopped only to dump Cadence—in her suit—in the middle of the room. "Isn't that right, Flare?"
Cadence regained her footing, quickly looked around to see her new surroundings. Then she turned to Killer Frost, her eyes immediately narrowing. She tilted her head back and forth, cracking her neck.
"Cade," Cisco breathed. "Don't."
"I have to, Cisco," Cadence replied. "I made a promise."
"Caitlin wouldn't want you to do this."
"There is no Caitlin." Cadence took in a deep breath and spat. "She's dead to me."
Cisco closed his eyes, feeling the hurt in Cadence's words. Knowing how badly it hurt. Because it was the same pain he felt when thinking about her every day. "She's not dead, she's here. She's standing right in front of us. She'd want us to help her. She'd want us to save her."
Killer Frost pouted, tilting her head to the side.
"No," Cadence replied. "She doesn't want to be saved. Killer Frost played us this entire time. it's not like you couldn't see it coming," Cadence's voice turned light. "Do you know how many times I've heard you guys say 'She's not Killer Frost', 'She's not going to become Killer Frost', 'There will be no Killer Frost on this Earth'?"
"Self-fulfilling prophecy," Killer Frost agreed. She giggled to herself. "it's like you wanted It to happen. And now you've got what you wanted. The future is set." Killer Frost shook her head. "No matter what happens to me, Breathtaker and Savitar…they're Gods. They're going to do everything they've set in motion. Your baby boy's going to watch as you take your dying breath all for a greater cause."
Cadence's teeth clenched as hard as her fists. "Don't you dare bring Brady into this," she hissed.
Killer Frost ignored her. Continued speaking. "That is, if he survives. If anyone manages to survive. You see, if one of us falls, there's always going to be someone else to take their place. You understand that, right? First Incognito, then Brady. First you, then White Hot. Michael Bloom…and you. There's always going to be someone to take someone's place, getting stronger and stronger each time." She flicked her hands towards Cisco. "Maybe I should let him have a go first. Maybe see how long he lasts until he has no choice but to kill me."
No.
Cisco shook his head. Slowly at first. Then faster and faster. No. He would never do that. Not to his best friend. Not to the person that knew him better than he knew himself. Not to someone who knew his family and was a buffer to it every time they were around. Not to the person who singlehanded made him feel that he was willing and able to be as much of a hero as Barry was, even if Barry couldn't see it himself. Not to someone who was his soul mate, his other half.
How else was Cisco able to understand every nuance of every expression Caitlin made? To know what she was thinking before she even had the thought. To give and receive a fist bump without having to look at her. To just know by a simple look to understand what was bothering her. Whether it be as bad as the worst of the worst days to something as simple as oversleeping because she was on a breakthrough the night before.
He'd longed to tell her how he felt about her, watching as her relationship with Ronnie blossomed, making him stamp down his own emotions that slowly grew out of control. Felt he had all the time in the world. Now he was expected to watch her be murdered by one of his friends? Was expected to take her on himself?
Cisco slowly shook his head. "I don't want to hurt you," he breathed.
Killer Frost pursed her lips. A teasing smile. "You won't," she promised. Then she turned her gaze to the side, looked directly at Cadence who glared back at her. "I'm going to hurt her. I'm going to hurt her in the ways that'd make her hurt the most. Then I'm going to kill her."
An icicle formed in her hand.
At the same time a long, solid piece of fire formed in Cadence's hand, pointing directly at Caitlin. Fire blazed in her eyes, before flickering at her feet, starting to form around her. The fire aura filled the air.
"Not if I kill you first," Cadence replied.
Killer Frost smirked and stepped back.
Cadence stepped forward.
The two launched at each other.
A/N: Well, things are certainly moving fast. I'm a bit bummed I have to move Abra Kadabra to my next story, but the plot for it is, in my opinion, cool. And even then it's a good plot with Brady along with moving Black Blade to be even more important there compared to how I was going to use him, originally, in this story.
Not to say you're not going to see Black Blade as this story ends, you will. He's a big catalyst for Brady's plot in the next season/story. It's just that I originally intended it to be in this one, but didn't get the chance with how things changed as I wrote.
Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this one.
Cheers,
-Riley
Review Replies
DarkHelm145: You'll find out that other meta in the next one. And there are some other faces that still have to appear as well.
Ethan: They're staying with Harrison and Tess because they wouldn't go all the way back to Metropolis to stay with Maya for as long as they'd think to be away. You're going to see Cade in court for Frankie's case, but not for a little bit. Yes, have lots of tissues ready.