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Writers Notes: thanks to my beta HGranger89 and thanks to RAV3N R1PP3R, Smithback, leonix2009, FrancineHibiscus, Guest, lia a karas, Smootsmokey, FlowerChild23, Guest, Sassyluv, gisela19wwe for your positive feedback.
Just as soon as Severus' dunderhead-free summer began, it ended, and the black haired wizard returned to Hogwarts to prepare for the upcoming term. Severus entered his office after a never-ending staff meeting, where the clown Lockhart droned on about himself for an hour. Severus shook his head in bewilderment, wondering what could have possessed Dumbledore to hire that boastful, curly blonde idiot.
The term had not even begun yet, and Severus found himself relying on all of his self-control to stop himself from blasting the flamboyant oaf, Gilderoy Lockhart into the next century.
'For all that is good and holy, how could the Headmaster hire that clown?' He thought, 'once again I've lost the D.A.D.A job to a talentless hack who has no business stepping near a classroom,' Severus seethed, his blood boiling.
No wonder no one's lasted a year in the position, Dumbledore kept hiring unqualified idiots who resigned, were sacked, or wound up dead. Severus was concerned for the students' safety, and he equated Lockhart teaching defense to Neville Longbottom teaching Potions. Snape was beginning to think the old man had finally lost his damned mind.
As Severus entered his office, he eyed his desk and there lying in his inbox, was a framed, signed portrait of Gilderoy Lockhart, smiling with his big stupid grin and punchable face. Severus quickly withdrew his wand and blew the thing into tiny shards. Feeling a bit better, he vanished the mess and began to draw up his lesson plan for the year.
Another thing that infuriated Severus lately was his whiny, spoiled, immature godson. An owl from the boy informed him that Draco was planning on buying his way on to the Slytherin Quidditch team. Lucius purchased each team member their own Nimbus Two Thousand and One. The boy was turning into a smug and spoiled little brat, with a mean streak and he blamed Lucius and Narcissa for encouraging his false sense of superiority. Severus hoped to be a guiding influence in the boy's life, preventing Draco from going down the same road as he and Lucius had, but with each passing year, that hope seemed to dim.
The week of meetings and term preparations ended quickly, and the dunderheads returned on the train, ready to make Severus' life a nightmare for the next ten months. Once again, Severus sat a the head table, just as he had for the last twelve years, paying little attention to the sorting ceremony. He had always felt that eleven was too young to sort children on personality traits that had yet to fully develop. He groaned when yet another Weasley, the only girl he noted, was sorted into Gryffindor. Minerva saw his expression and leaned over to him muttering, "She's the last of them."
'Well, thank Merlin for small miracles at least,' Severus thought.
Speaking of Gryffindor, Severus didn't spot Potter or the youngest Weasley boy at the Gryffindor table.
'Not even one day into the term and the brat is already breaking the rules,' Severus thought to himself and made an excuse to leave the feast.
At that moment, Dumbledore stood to introduce the newest member of staff. At the sight of Lockhart, most of the female students and even a few of the males cheered exuberantly. The clown was just about to open his mouth and begin boasting when Severus slipped out the back entrance of the Great Hall in search of Potter and Weasley.
As Severus made his way to the Entrance Hall, standing on the castle's threshold, he heard a noise that sounded like a car engine. Having grown up in a muggle neighborhood, Severus was used to vehicles, but he had no idea how one managed to bypass Hogwarts' wards and arrive on the grounds.
Running outside, the Potions Master could hear the noise growing louder and louder. He looked around the grounds, but could see nothing, then realized the sound was hurtling towards him from the sky. Looking heavenward, he spotted a turquoise Ford Anglia, the exact same one headlining the Evening Prophet, detected by seven muggles, hurtling towards the Whomping Willow. The Boy-Who-Lived-to-be-a-pain-in-his-arse was just like his father, thinking nothing of breaking the International Statute of Secrecy to make a grand entrance at Hogwarts.
Then suddenly the car crashed into the Whomping Willow, damaging many of its branches. He wouldn't let himself hope that the Headmaster would expel Potter, even if he would have expelled a Slytherin for less; however, it couldn't hurt to try. He quickly immobilized the Whomping Willow, giving the two miscreants a chance to escape, then, the car violently flew them out of the car and drove itself off into the Forbidden Forest.
Severus, watched all of this unfold from the shadows, deciding to lull the boys into a false sense of security. As they grabbed their school trunks and Potter's owl cage, the boys began the long walk up to the Entrance Hall, Severus following close behind.
"Let's get into the Great Hall quickly and try to avoid that great git Snape," Harry groaned.
"Maybe he got sacked," Ron said, fingers crossed.
"Or maybe he up and quit," Harry smiled also crossing his fingers tightly.
"Or maybe he is waiting to find out why you two delinquents didn't arrive on the Hogwarts Express, like the other 275 students managed," Severus whispered in his deadly calm baritone voice.
The two boys whirled around, their noses inches away from their Potions Master's chest.
"Prof... Prof... Professor Snape?" Harry stuttered.
"Silence..." Snape hissed, "follow me."
The two dunderheads ran to catch up to their tall Professor's long strides. As he began to lecture the pair, Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall showed up to excuse the two with nothing more than detention and a letter home. Dumbledore tried to lure the young man back to the Great Hall with the offer of custard tart, but Severus shot his employer a look of pure venom and left Minerva in his office to deal with her brats.
Instead, he headed to the Slytherin common room to await his students to give his annual speech and explain the house rules to the first years. He then gave out their appointment times to meet with Madam Pomfrey for their yearly physicals. He was the only Head of House who bothered with the practice; however, he was also the only one who knew what it was like to grow up malnourished and physically abused. His colleagues hadn't noticed twenty years ago, and they didn't see the signs in their current students either.
Hermione, who was happily back at Hogwarts, was unpacking her trunk when Parvati Patil came running into the girl's dorm, yelling that Harry being expelled for crashing a car into the Whomping Willow. Hermione was convinced that it was Ron who had caused the trouble and poor Harry was getting caught in it. She did like Harry, but he was he was so quiet and just followed Ron's lead in everything. The rumors of Harry and Ron expulsion ran throughout the night and wasn't until the two were spotted at the Great Hall breakfast were they were confirmed as false.
As Professor McGonagall passed out their timetables in the Great Hall, the second year Gryffindors, Hermione excluded were furious that potions were the first class of the new term.
As Professor Snape strode into his classroom, the small voice of Hermione Granger called out, "How as your summer Professor?" catching him and the entire class off guard.
Ron could be heard muttering teacher's pet under his breath, and Severus took away five points.
"Dreadful Miss Granger," Severus replied as he started passing out a pop quiz.
He wanted to make sure the dunderheads had retained the little information they'd bothered to learn in the first place. As per usual, only a few students passed the test, and Miss Granger was the only one to earn an Outstanding. He would never admit it, but Hermione Granger was one of a tiny group of students he actually enjoyed. Although it was still a bit early to scope the true magnitude of her skills and talent, she followed instructions correctly and easily, demonstrated a willingness to learn and the ability to concentrate that was rare in pupils her age.