Wow. It's been a really long time now. I had just no idea how to continue ugh. But your reviews kept me going so I just told myself to get this done. So thank you all for your support and love. This chapter is a little longer so enjoy and more rambling at the end;)

Chapter 2:

The war had ended. They had won. But they didn't exactly feel like celebrating, there was just too much loss to be truly happy. And when all the shinobi had seen Sakura soaked in blood and unconscious in Hatakes arms they felt like screaming. She had been healing and saving them through all this damned war, how could she be hurt this badly. Then their eyes would take in Hatakes look and his murderous aura. Of course they knew how strong the bonds ran in team seven but somehow this seemed much too intimate. And then they saw Sasuke. His gaze far away and his right arm drenched in blood and suddenly everyone got it. As soon as Naruto noticed the tension in the air and saw how they all seemed about to murder his best friend he jumped in front of him and began explaining.

Sure, most of them were glad that he didn't try to kill Sakura on purpose but all of Konoha who knew Sakura and her story with the Uchiha just glared at him.

It was a really tough week, but finally they all were home.

Home.

It felt weird to finally be able to calm down after so much fighting. The Shinobi were slowly settling down and trying to adapt to life once again. While others who had died in battle were buried and mourned over.

It was a very tiring week with all the accommodations but finally Konoha was nearly as good as new or rather as back when there hadn't been war. The peace treaty with the other five nations was still in place so all that was left was fighting against the rogue nins.

But Kakashi didn't give a damn about all that crap. He had been sitting in the hospital room for this whole week and had waited for Sakura to wake up. At the same time he was being watched over by Genma who was to intervene if Kakashi was to attack a certain Uchiha again.

Honestly? He couldn't care less about the damned Uchiha brat right now. All he wanted was for Sakura to wake up. She had been in a coma since the first time she had woken up after Tsunades healing. Since then all her friends and other gracious shinobi had come to look after her. Even the Uchiha had come at one point and Tsunade had to throw Kakashi out of her room. Naruto had been anxiously watching his former sensei and best friend, unsure of what to do.

"He didn't want to kill her, Kakashi-sensei, dattebayo!" He defended that stupid Uchiha kid. But Kakashi had just given his famous eye crinkle and right before he could lunge for the Uchiha again Genma had grabbed him and violently wrestled him out of the room.

Right now he was sitting at her bedside again and holding her rather cold hand. He glanced at her sleeping face and felt his heart clench painfully. She was so beautiful even when unconscious and rather skinny. He knew that she would be grumpy about all the weight loss but at least she was alive, right?

"Sakura..." he sighed again and pressed his forehead against her limp hand.

"I should have protected you. Back when you were a Genin and I was still your Sensei, I should have been there for you and protecting you…"

A soft throat clearing broke him out of his thoughts and he glanced at the person standing on the other side of Sakuras bed. His eyes narrowed and his body tensed.

"Kakashi" Sasuke began while watching Sakura with unreadable eyes. "I know why you hate me. But that doesn't matter. I don't need your forgiveness nor your consent. I will be here for her and her only."

With that he sat down and took Sakuras other hand and stared at the older man coldly.

Kakashi was speechless. He wasn't aware that his feelings could be read that easily. But he wouldn't give the Uchiha the pleasure in proving his assumptions right, because that was all they truly were. Assumptions.

And then he felt his hand being squeezed.

Her head hurt and her throat felt like she had swallowed dust. A faint beeping noise told her everything she needed to know. She was in the hospital. That in itself was quite surprising, she had been sure that she would die. After all that healing she had to do plus the fighting she hadn't had enough chakra to heal the damage to her heart and her lungs. It was a small miracle to be alive.

And then she felt two different hands in her own and frowned. One she knew belonged to Kakashi, she could tell because of his fingerless gloves. But whose was the other one?

Well there would be no knowing without opening her eyes, she thought.

As soon as the light hit her eyes she groaned and heard two chairs tumble to the floor.

Way to go and scaring your comrades, Sakura, she thought grumpily.

When her eyes didn't feel like being burned out of her head she blinked a few times and stared uncomprehendingly at the person holding her right hand.

"Wha-?" she croaked out and immediately flinched and ended up coughing baldy until a cup of water was placed in her left hand and when she looked up she saw Kakashi standing there and watching her with a warm eye.

She closed her eyes and soaked in the feeling of the cold liquid flowing down her parched throat. Then she opened them again and smiled gratefully at Kakshi and then she focused her eyes on Sasuke and the fact that he was still holding her hand.

She opened her mouth to speak but was cut off as he lunged forward and very uncharacteristically wrapped his arms tightly around her.

"I am so sorry, Sakura. I never meant to kill you. I never could" he finished quietly.

Sakura was shocked. Never in a million years would she have thought Sasuke of all people to talk about emotions or apologize. But at the same time she was so glad to have her Sasuke-kun back and tears gathered in her eyes.

"Sasuke...it's alright. I forgive you you stupid man! After all how could I not forgive the one I love, ne?" she asked and grinned brightly at him. Sasuke pulled back and stared at her with pure adoration in his eyes.

Then the door slammed shut and Sakura jolted. When she turned she saw that Kakashi had left the room.

Kakashi…?, she thought a little sad that he had left that abruptly. But then Sasuke sat down on her bed and grabbed her hand once again.

"I want to make it up to you for all the times I hurt you" he told her. His thumb drew circles on the back on her hand which was rather distracting. Then he leaned forward and pressed his lips softly against hers and all thought process ceased.

Sasuke-freaking-Uchiha is kissing me, me! Then the door burst open and Tsunade, followed by all her friends stumbled into the room. Sasuke had pulled back the second the door handle had been pushed down and sent her a conspiratorial smirk.

"Everyone out! I have to examine her before you brats can smother her with your stupidity!" Tsunade bellowed and shoved them all out the door. Then she turned to her apprentice and before she knew what hit her she was locked in one of her shishous rare hugs.

"I really thought I had lost you, you stupid girl!" Her shishou whispered roughly and both of them began to cry sliently.

After she was finally released she went straight to her apartment in the desperate need of a shower and fresh clothes. With a final shut she closed the doors behind her and stood in the dark hallway of her apartment.

Her thoughts were a mess. She raked her hand frustrated through her hair and trudged towards her bathroom. Slowly she let her dirty clothes fall to the floor. Somehow none of her so-called friends had thought about getting her fresh clothes to change into if she was to wake up. Instead she had to wear the clothes from the battle with the huge whole on her front. Gratefully Ino had lent her her green vest.

She stepped in the shower and let the cold water splash on her tired body. Shivering and clenching her teeth she stood under the cold water and waited until the water turned finally warm. But the shaking didn't stop. And then she broke down.

She could have died. And she should have. She had done it to save two of her most precious people and she would do it again. And now Sasuke was back in Konoha and apparently he wanted to be with her and Naruto had his best friend back. But still she felt as if she had lost a huge part of herself. She felt hollow and cold inside. Shouldn't she be happy that everything was over and the man she loved was finally returning her feelings?

But she wasn't happy, was she… She still saw all the blood and broken people in front of her eyes. She knew that she was traumatized, damnit she knew! But what did that do her? Nothing! Except that she knew that she had a lot of work to do and – sigh – that she was tired. She was so damn tired.

Was it weird that a small part wished she had actually died? Of course she knew that she had chosen that path and that being a medic meant seeing blood and death and loss. But she had seen So. Much. She was sure that none of her peers had seen quite as much pain and deformed people as she had. During a fight you were concentrated on yourself, on getting out of it alive. Your mind didn't really register when you killed a person and when they fell to the ground you just went on to the next before your mind actually had the time to take in the gruesome view. But as medic you had to take the time and take it all in in order to see the damage done and calculate if there was something to save. But that wasn't even the worst. No, the worst had been when she had tried to save them and the blood kept staining her hands while she had to look in their eyes and see their acceptance. And then they would begin to cry or scream or mumbling last words and she, she had to stay calm and watch them slowly die. Right. In Front. Of. Her. Eyes. But the really really worst had been when the young ones had slowly slipped out of her grip.

She slammed her hands against the tiles and let out a strangled sob.

She should be happy to be alive but she couldn't. At least not at the moment. Maybe later, when she had more time to cope with all the cruelty she had seen.

Slowly she raised her hand and turned off the water and just stood there. The cool air made her shiver but she just couldn't bring herself to care. She felt so damn empty and she knew her friends wouldn't understand. Not even Sasuke. He seemed to be finally seeing the light, so how could she go and burden him with her darkness? No, she wouldn't dim his light not now, not ever. He deserved it more than anyone to be walking in the light again.

A knock on her door wrenched her out of her thoughts. Her forehead leaned against the cold tiles and her eyes merely slid to the still closed door.

"Sakura?" his voice sounded slightly concerned. But she didn't move. She couldn't. If she moved she was sure to break apart. That the darkness would rip her apart and devour her whole.

The doorknob turned slowly and sliver hair slowly came into view.

"Sakura..." his voice trailed into nothing as he took in the sight before him. There she stood, her naked body wet and glistening with water and lightly shaking with tremors. But what really made him freeze were her eyes. Her beautiful jade eyes were locked on him and he swore he could see her soul crying out for help. It was as if she was warring on the inside and slowly losing the fight as her eyes became duller the longer he stood there.

Then he snapped out of it, grabbed a big towel and swiftly wrapped her shaking body in it before he pulled her in his chest and just held her.

"Kakashi" her voice sounded strangled as if she was being choked. "It won't stop… I can still see it… all the pain… all the loss…" He tightened his hold on her and felt her breaking down in his arms. This strong woman was breaking down in his arms because she had seen too much misery. As her knees gave out on her he swept her up in his arms and carried her to her bed where he slowly lay down with her still in his arms. Her hands clutched at his shirt desperately as her sobs shook her body. Ha had known that the war would take its toll on her. After all she was one of the best medic – no scratch that – she was the best medic. She had seen more destruction than anyone else. She had seen the destruction the war truly bestowed on everyone. She had seen how the war had torn the bodies apart on the inside and she had been the one to mend them back together just to be torn apart again. He couldn't even begin to understand what it must be like to understand the human body and its workings and how much damage truly was dealt to it or how much pain they must have felt. But Sakura could. And she had.

"I… can't…" she sobbed and he began combing her hair. But she suddenly pushed herself away and grabbed her hair and looked at him with a nearly crazed look in those hauntingly beautiful eyes.

"No...i-it's t-too much! C-can't they see-e? WHY!?" She yelled and watched him desperately. He just watched her, watched how her chest fell with her erratic breathing, how her muscles were tense and ready, for what he wasn't sure. And he knew.

"Because they didn't lose as much as we did" he whispered softly and watched as all the strength left her and she slumped down. Her eyes empty and so lost.

"We?" she asked brokenly and reached a shaking hand out for him. He gently took it and pulled her to him once again.

"Yes we. We lost more than most of them. We didn't just lose one ore two precious people. We lost most of them. And you lost more because you get easily attached to people in need. So every time you lost one of your patients they broke you a little bit more and took something of you with them."

She threaded her fingers with his and squeezed his hand.

"But what about Sasuke?" she whispered miserably. "He lost so much more. He lost his entire clan, then he had to kill his only living family just to learn that his whole family was bad. He has suffered so much more!"

"And look where it took him. He fell into darkness. And he stayed there because he didn't want to see the light w- you and Naruto tried to show him. But we see it and so we are trapped in a world of gray with black splotches. And we so desperately seek the white light."

"The darkness...for the others it is finally over. They found their way back into the light" she whispered and he just nodded.

"You are still in the darkness, Kakashi."

Kakashi froze as he heard her call him by his name and only his name for the first time.

"But the light shines upon you so the darkness won't touch you ever again" she continued and she sounded so sure and determined. He chuckled and buried his nose in her damp hair.

"And why is that?" he asked amused. She straightened and turned to him. Her eyes suddenly full of determination.

"Because I am this light and I won't allow the darkness to touch you again."

He stared at her. Did she even know what those words did to him? How much his soul hurt just to hear those words.

"And what about you?" he asked to distract himself from his urge to caress her cheek.

"Me?" she seemed surprised and he nodded with an amused glint in his eyes.

"I think I am still in the darkness but you are the light that lightens my way out of there. And Naruto and the others will all light my way too, until I can stand in the light again and leave the darkness behind."

Then she smiled at him and her eyes began to shine a little with her old warmth.

He swallowed and just nodded while she settled down next to him.

Thank you Kakashi. I really felt as though I was being swallowed. And I won't let you be swallowed again, I promise. I am going to be the light for you like you just have been for me, with those thoughts and his hand in hers she slowly drifted off to sleep.

Soo... a little Kakasaku before we get started with all the drama. And guys thank you again for your reviwes, your favourites and follows. I was soo happy! I still can't believe that you like the stuff I am writing. But I promise I won't stop writing until it is complete. AT this note: it could take a littl while until the next chapter is to come cause college will start soon again. But I have a few chapters already planned out and even the music for it (uneblievabale I know) but I have to write so much until I can write those scenes. Oh and I have an idea about a Gaara-Sakura fic, so let me know what you think about it. But if I write it I will probably write a few chapters in advance so you don't have to wait so long. Well enough rambling from me. Till next time and stay save guys!