"No James Earl Cash I won't help you unlit you make this riot. You have to bring the Journalist back to lift."
"Then Dr White. Looked at the head." It looks like she died of capitulation. That miens you can't bring her back as a zombie or a vampire, but you can bring her back as a Mummy or a Frankenstein.
"Hand on Doc. I had tests to run before I do this." Then James Earl Craig Booed took the head and deft.
Chapter 4
AN: Someone on Sermonizes (the lady how did the Hit man The Hitting Anime) Disco said I only write about boring bald chanters. Maybelle that was true when I rote The Hitting but I'm going to be a serious writer so I'm going to snow the sentient side of James Earl Cash and how deep he is!
It was a Dark and Stormy night. That's not moral in Arizona's desert byre James Earl Cash wast in Phoenix anymore.
He was Ian the Mission Arizona sedentary. But even before the United States took over Mission Arizona form Mexico and made it Phoenicia it was run by Indianans and the Missing Arizona cemetery was a accent Indian burial gourd. And ancient Indian ghosts wale still there and mad it rain all the time to make fun of Whit retired American who thought they ran the place even well thy had to import water for their suburbs.
James Earl Cash didn't care about the ghosts race war because it was lame and he was busy. The serial killer needled to find out what was the est way o bring the Journalist back to life. And their were only to bodies he cold expungement on without a parent. And they were his dead permits.
So that night James Earl Cash was holding an umbrella with one minuscule arm and digging the dirt over his parents graves' with his other muscled arm. Wen he was half thorough he tought he heard a person walking around. The bald serial roller looked around in the dark to see ho was approaching him bit in the dark he cold oily see it was a person so he ran into a grave and pertained to be dead until the person went away.
James Earl Cash looked at the noting of death he almost died from a million times with his coded eyes. Ten the jail-bait turned serial killer heard a women's voice that was almost as bitchy as the voice he new he would her in hell from Satan; just not as scary.
"HA HA HA! Its James Earl Cash! All the conspiracy websites said you were still alive and killed Roy Smith and his supper PACK! The government said they killed ace other so they didn't have to give more money to the policy! The conciliators sad you were gong to come back to desultory the government, but you cant because YOU WERE DEAD THIS WHOLE TIME."
"Then she said. Ad Sense your dead I'm stealing your wallet. The contrarians might say its wrong bit if they relay belied what they said they wold have buried you with horror. Don't worry your dead head James Earl Cash. The true believers will make sire you're money doesn't go to waste! HILL SATAN!"
James Earl Cash was pissed off but he waited unlit the last minute wen he left a hand teaching intro his pocket. Then the grumpy serial killer oped his eyes ad saw the pale bald woman how was abusing him and before she cold redact he grabbed her arm and body slammed her into the grave. Then he git out to couture his exhibition.
James Earl Cash kept googling until he hit the morbid wood of the double coffer or his patents, then he took a break and sat down and drank a beer. "But then to the blue wearing serial killer's frustration the bald lardy sat next to him to keep tailing. In not mad at you James Earl Cash. I dot believe in letting other people take fevers UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE LIKE THE CHRISTIANS and sense you're alive you had every right to keep everything you have!"
"The Weird bald lady was wearing a old Gothic black dress and boats with spiky high heels that broke the ground every she went. Her mean hands both had black metal rings with rubes shaped like devil heads. Her bald face had black foreshadow and black lipstick and she had the Mark off the Best on her chin so if you dint look very closely it kinda looked lie a Satanic Goatee. and with her alloying happy grin she said. Let me induce myself. My name is Alice Crow, and I'm a Statist."
James Earl Cash looked at her weird and replied. "Get off my buck." "Go to a mall and flip off normal people how like songs that are happy."
"Is that what you stink Goth Satanists are like James Earl Cash? FORD SHAME! Alice Crow neglected him. Hats a bad stereotype and you shouldn't fallow it. No I'm gonna explain to you what Satanism is all about to you."
James Earl Cash drank other beer and got back to shoveling. "And Alice Crow kelp talking with a voice so pretender the most dangerous shopper in America still heard everything. I bet you went to church and they told you if you were good you'd go to Heathen were inverting was perfect. BUT THATCH NOT TRUE! We all went to do some bad thinks, but everyone's good in Heaven so it can't be prefect! HEAVEN IS A BIG FAT SCAM FOR WUSSIES HOW DOT WANT TO NE THEMSELVES!"
No James Earl Cash was starting to get alloyed so he starting flinging he last dirt on Alice Crow's face to try shutting her up. "But she kept talking. Satin told people the truth. We should do whatever we want to make ourselves happy! Who cares about helping other people or bang nice? We need to be our bad shelves on Earth while were alive to be really happy! All the so-called vitreous people say going to hell is the wurst thing that cam happen to us, but if Stan envoys torturing people its the least he deserves for showing us the truth! That's why I'm wit h the Church of Satan! WE STRAND FOR FAIRNESS AND HAPLESSNESS!"
"Alice Crow tried walking up to give James Earl Cash a business card." But wit the dearth in her eyes she tripped and fell into the Cashes parents gravestone. "She read it was foe Billy Ray and Billie Jean Cash, ad she asked James Earl Cash are ties your parents?"
Ten she cane to the only computation her nasty mind could come to. "Are you gonna fuck your dead patients? That is totally cool James Earl Cash! Who cares about the people how call it wrong or immutable? Their dead Why should anymore care what you do to dead people!? James Earl Cash, if you want to get your dick out and show god what you think of his stupid rules I"M RIFT BEHIND YOU!"
That wants what James Earl Cash was going to do. Intact instance of cheering up James Earl Cash Alice Crow just made the moist hated film star in American even madder. The memories of his traumatic passed and the alcohol in his bold set his brain on fire.
And so James Earl Cash walker behind Alice Crow and did a hasty shovel execution i.e. he scooped her up and flog her out of the graybeard so hard she broke her neck and skull when he shit the ground. Then James Earl Cash could Finnish his execration in peace.
James Earl Cash pot his parents dead bodies in a wheelbarrow and took them to the Roadkill Kitten Hospitable in Phoenix. It was fanged off and the widows were all boarded up But James Earl Cash knew were they just closed for the night and no for good. They jest wanted people to think they wear so Coleman Fort would stop braking in and stealing their drugs to sell so James Earl Cash just found some pliers and ribbed up the fence to set in.
The halls of the hospital hid lights the flinched on and off al the time and the walls were covered with sterilized bloody handsprings and creepy drawings kids made. Also their was a dead kid whose body was supported to be donated to science but was jest sitting around, disturber in its wastefulness. It was all supported to scare of people who broke in, but there was one thing carrier than all that, and it was James Earl Cash, the FBI's secret moist wanted man, walking around with two dead people. And since James Earl Cash wasn't tracing to stealth through he found one person who got to see it.
The peon was a nurse but James Earl Cash could tell he was a guy because his mane tag said his name was John Paul. John Paul froze up and James Earl Cash held the flyers up to his face i.e. he was abort to hastily pinch of his neck vein unlit he went brain dead. "Hey Johnny! I'm doing expungements with dead people! Ar you an organ donor?"
"PLEASE DON'T KILL ME JAMES EARL CASH! Benign John Paul. I can take you to the mogul! It's a like hospital for dead people!"
And John Paul stated crying and praying for mercy and James Earl Cash left so sorry he could be angry anymore. Instead he cried a little too and said. Yeah. Sure man.
"HALLELUJAH! Chaired John Paul." Then he gave James Earl Cash hid keys and when James Earl Cash felt hoe prayed to God to thank him forgot getting him killed.
Ounce James Earl Cash was really done claiming down he put his Dad's body on a operational table and stated the process of turning him into a Frankincense. He fond all the pats of his dad that were rotten and replenished them with fetish ones from the bodies in the morgue. The he stick a power cable in the nose and puled him into the wall. James Earl Caches daft twitched a bunch as his body started working again before he got up groaning.
"Hes Alice! HES ALIVE!" Yelled James Earl Cash like the institutions told him to so his Dad would know he wasn't dead anymore.
"Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. Grenade James Earl Caches Dad when he got of the tablet becloud his brain was stale rebooting a figuring out how to talk avian. James Earl Cash my son its good to see you but I fell like shit. What happened?"
"So your not a psycho?" Asked James Earl Cash with the hope in his heart?
"Now but what am I" then James Earl Caches Dad walked to a mirror and saw the sowing marks all over his body? "Oh my God! I'm a Frankenstein! I'm a mobster! I SHOULDN'T"T BEE!
"YES! It overworked!" Exhumed James Earl Cash.
Bit James Earl Caches Bad wasn't happy like he was. "James Earl Cash I now I was a dad father but I don't reserve this. Why did you do this? Is it case I stole your Moms money after yore were born and spent it on drugs? Or when I mad you spiel in the doghouse after i turned you're room into a meth lab? I just waited to make up for what I did!"
"But I'm not mad ad you! I joist needed to do an exponent to see how best to resurrect lonesome! I lobe you just how you are Dad! And affect I'm done getting renege were going camping!"
"BUT I SHOULDN'T"T BE!" Mooned James Earl Caches Dad.
"Just stay here and watch TV Dad. Ill be back later and we can have the fatter son relationship we were merit to have!"
But when James Earl Catch tried to leave no matter ho hard he tried he couldn't walk to the door. After a second he resized their was a hand with a dead mans grip on his shoulder holding him bask. Then the had turned him around and he looked at his Dad's sad face and eyes. He looked like he reasonable man he was supped to have been when he was alive but wasn't.
"James Earl Cash. James Earl Caches Dad said calmly. I shouldn't be. And even though I wasn't much hell you turned out to be a great murderer. You know what to dodo."
James Earl Cash new what he met but he hared the thought. "But I love you Dad!"
"James Earl Cash. I soulful be. If you rally love me you won't let me be."
Ten he just stood around while James Earl Cash got a grip on himself. The nest thing James Earl Cash tog a grip on was the scalpel he just used to bring his Dad back to life. Then he walked behind his Dad and peppered himself.
"Okay...I LOVE YOU DAD!" Screened James Earl Cash and a spilt second later he did the gruesome scalpel execution i.e. he surgically removed his but and all his guts fell out the hole. James Earl Caches dad still had a little eccentricity powering his body so he tried to go sit down and die in piece, but he slipped on the vomit and fell on the Risk board. And so James Earl Caches Died dad trying to conquer the hole world.
After a second James Earl Cash relived he did the right thing. But he hadn't did time to think about it cause no the knew he needed to do the same thing to the Journalist.
James Earl Cash pit his Dad's bode in a chair and looked up the steps to tune his Mom into a Mummy. Then when John Paul came ion he cut off all of his Mom's organs while John Paul ingested embalming fluid into her heart that James Earl Cash saved fro last so they could us it to pump it all overt like blood.
That awes step 1 and 2. But Jam Earl Cash was grossed out by all the blood and gusts and went to the medicine Cabernet to get anti-Ritalin soil he could get distracted and stop thinking abbot his dead Mom's corpse. But he was to slow and through up before he could take the pills.
John Paul saw how sad James Earl Cash was and tired giving him a therapeutic back rub bit it didn't work and after a few seconds James Earl Cash body slammed him into the vomit so he wouldst hit the hard floor but wood still get the point. "I NEVER CONCEITED TO THIS! Ten after the stopped panicking James Earl Cash continuity. I bet you never had to cut up your dead parents after they got killed even tough you tried to save them even though they were horrible to you! YOU"LL NEVER UNDERSTAND JOHNNY!
John Paul stayed clam. "I'm so story for your less, but all of ties horrible things have given me a question. James Earl Cash ave you accepted Jesus as your personnel savior?"
"Ardent God and Jesus the same person? Asked James Earl Cash." Then this reply was so sad he cried a kettle through this anger. "Because God hates me! That's while he let my like go to shit!"
"Oh." I'm sorry James Earl Cash. "Tell you wait. Offer We're done I'll teak you to my Church and well fix that!"
"Just get the fucking magic jars."
And then James Earl Cash and John Paul started steps 34 and 5. They booth put James Earl Caches mom's origins in Egyptian magic jars and then since James Earl Cash new John Paul was Christian and didn't want to be insensitive anymore he let John Paul wrap his mom in bandages while he read the Egalitarian Book Of The Dead Backwards.
After a couple pagers James Earl Caches mom stated groaning and get up. "Whets the fuck am I" she tried to satay? But since she had bandages on her mouth it was jest mumbling and she got mad and puked John Paul out of her way to get a electric voice box form a dead bronchitis cancer patient.
"James Erl Cash is this my tomb? Why did yo lite this stupid nurse onto my tomb? Dint I rise you better then to let people defy tombs? You STUPID BART!"
"Its okay Moss Cash!" John Paul said all pathetic and nasally pecans he was punching off his nosebleed from when James Earl Caches Mom Pinched Him. James Earl Cash ad I re friends now! "And after wear done hear We'll all go to Bible Study!"
"SHUT UP YOU FINKING FAKE CHRISTIAN! Yelled James Earl Caches mom. YOUR JOUST GOING TO BE A BAD INTERFERENCE ON MY BOY AND GET HIM ON DRUGS AND MAKE HIM A CLINICAL! HEW WAS JUTS FINE UNTIL PEOPLE LIKE YOU SHOULDER UP!"
Mom cut it out! James Earl Cash complained. Your output of control!
NO "YOU"RE OUT OF CONTROL! AND I"M GOING TO CRUISE THIS BASTARD!" Then James Earl Caches Mom started talking gibberish and James Earl Cash And John Paul had no idea what shew as doing.
Except John Paul did now but it scared him. "You're Mom is speaking in tonnes James Earl Cash! Oh My Goodness! James Earl Cash did your Mom read The bible?"
"Year! James Earl Cash said after a second barbecue John Paul gave me bed memories of his Mom beating him up. And she used to beat me up for not reading it!"
"OH NO." streaked John Paul! "Shoe knows the ancient Equestrian curses! WEAR DOMED!"
But it was to late because affect he said that James Earl Caches mom fished the curse and a plague of locusts flew in and ate John Paul. And even through John Paul's last words were just him saying they wear doomed he dint get to finish before thy ate his head and bode and felt just his terrible skeleton.
James Earl Cash looked don at the ketone that he new wold look scared if the locals wold have the condensation to leave his eyes and then he looked his mom with his eyes that newer needed to see this on top of everything else. "WHAT THE FULLBACK MOM!" HE COLD HAVE BEEN MY FRIEND! "I NEVER WOOD HAVE BROUGHT YOU BASK IF I NEW YOU WOULD STILL BE ABUSIVE TO EVERYONE!"
"SHOT UP YOU LITTLE BITCH! I HAD NO SON! I BET THE ONLY REASON YOU WANT TO JAIN WAS SO YOU COLD GET RAPED SO YOU COLD TELL ME YOU WERE GAY SO YOU COLD DISAPPOINT ME AGAIN!"
James Earl Cash was shocked his Mom would acutely say that to him. And he new she knew he was socked bit clearly she never cared anymore. "Thais it Mom! Declared James Earl Cash at his dented mother. Your out of lines!"
"NO! YOUR OUT OF LINES! I BROUGHT YOUR WORLD SO NOW I"M GOING TO BRING YOUR HELL!
Then she stated talking in tones again and James Earl Cash had on idea what she was haying. Expect he really did know. Their was only one thing it could be.
And he new it was the last Egyptian curse. The on that would keel her son.
Before James Earl Cash could even thank about hit he ran to get the last aid kit the morgue kept for people who went actually dead mad pulled out the heart shock puddles. He could feel the Greg Reaper coming for him as he ran aground plugging it into three outlets to surcharge then. Them at the last minute be broke the magi jar with his moms lunges in them and shocked them.
The lungs got burned up like well done barbecue buggers. But since James Earl Caches Mon was still using them with magic to make her body work she breathed out fire and instance of finishing the curse she screamed "FULLBACK!" and when he Grim Reaped showed up he forgot what to do so he payed Risk with John Paul's Ghost. John Paul Won, but he still wet to the afterlife like a good spot.
Amway while that wad ongoing on James Eel Cash shocked his moms heart and all the emblem fluid in her cot fire. James Earl Caches mom was lit up like a Jansenist paper lamp wheel she swore at James Earl Crap like a rap CD written by someone hating a divorce. "I NEVER SOLD HAVE PICKED OUT UP FORM SCHOOL AFTER THE OTTER KIDS BROKE YOUR LEGS YOU SHITTY LITTLE BALD SPAS!" She finished before burning up competently.
James Earl Cash waiting a minute in the quiet to calm down. Then he looked at the skeleton of John Paul, which was there for no good reason. Then he looked at the burned Elton of his mom.
"DAMMIT MOM!" James Earl Cash yelled. His teas in his eyes, which were the living only ones left in the room, evaporated instantly under the heat of his arguer. "This is worst than when my girlfriend form high school came over AND YOU CALLED HER A SLUT AND BEAT HER UP!