I haven't forgotten about John's team. :) But this story is mostly about the trials that John and Carson have to face. Lucius is not a kind man.

You'll start to see more of the team as the story progresses.

Thank you so much for all the reviews so far, it's nice to know that this story of mine is being read.

Jennifer sat in Carson's quarters staring at his desk. He had a picture of his mother in an old fashioned frame sitting at the corner of it, and for some reason that made Jennifer want to burst into tears.

Carson was a good man and a great doctor...and now he was gone...missing along with Colonel Sheppard; it had been weeks with no news on their whereabouts. The search teams were back, except for Ronon who was still out running down every contact he knew for information; Woolsey had refused Teyla and Rodney's request to leave Atlantis to accompany the Satedan.

"We need some of you here." he had said.

"If any new information comes up, we'll mount a search, but we need some of you here…what if the Wraith come?"

Everyone was running around calling in favors, quietly asking their most trusted off-world associates to keep an eye out for John and Carson. It was dangerous giving away the information that their friends were missing; if their enemies found out it would be a race to see who found them first…but they had to try everything.

With all the effort to find them, Jennifer noticed that no one ever mentioned the D word.

She brought it up to Rodney earlier that day and the look in his eyes made her shut her mouth quickly.

They were…

Not

Dead!

She quickly apologized, but he gave her one more scathing glance then turned and strode down the hallway tapping furiously on his tablet.

She vowed never to bring up that word again; they would find them…they had to.

The sound of the door opening shook her from her reverie, she looked up to see Teyla standing in the doorway.

"How are you, Jennifer?" asked the Athosian, not surprised at her presence in the room. Teyla's soft smile did not match the look in her brown eyes.

Jennifer wiped at the tears that had started from her own eyes.

"I'm okay, Teyla. How are you doing?"

Teyla stepped into the room and moved to sit on Carson's couch.

"I have just come from John's quarters…it has been hard, but we are still trying to find them. I just wanted to stop by Dr. Beckett's living space; it helps being around somewhere where they call home. I can feel their presence this way...a little piece of each of them."

Jennifer started to stand. "I'll leave you alone." she murmured.

"No, please stay. It looks like you and I had the same idea." urged Teyla quietly, then she sat back against the couch and closed her eyes; trying to find peace in her heart where at the moment only frustration lay.

Jennifer nodded slowly then turned back to the desk and the picture of a good man's mother.

The screams had faded away but Lucius had waited and ten minutes after the last faint scream, he opened the door to the room.

A quick press of another button on the panel and lights flickered on rapidly lightening the darkness. He waited for a moment then stepped through the doorway in time to hear a loud shriek and see his "pet" scamper away from its human perch and go skittering into a corner of the room, vanishing from sight.

Smiling, he turned to the other side of the room, his smile widening; his son writhed on the ground, panting heavily, eyes squeezed shut.

John's mind was splintering, the shards spinning through him; a jagged tornado.

"Nnnnn..!"

Thoughts flew through him; staticky, jumbled, sharp, ripping him to shreds.

When he felt a touch on his face, it was like being burned; he gasped, eyes flying open, then squeezing shut once again, the light too painful.

"Nnnn..!" he panicked, trying to slide away from the touch; tears slipping from the corners of his eyes.

"Nahkhan, it's me your father. I've come to take you out of here." whispered Lucius, kneeling by the man's side.

John felt a hand rest on his chest shaking him, and fear shot through him almost slamming him into unconsciousness.

Words were lost and he cried out trying to catch his breath, unable to calm his body.

Lucius paused for a moment, then leaned forward and grabbed John roughly by the sides of his head and turned it whispering sharply into his ear.

John bucked at this, but Lucius held on tight.

"I can leave you in here and turn off the lights again. Or...you can come with me, son. Nahkhan, will you come with me and let me take you from this place?"

Lucius leaned back hands still on John's face and waited, eyes narrowing in anticipation.

He did not have to wait long.

A twitching hand reached up and grabbed onto his wrist; John's eyes slowly opening into a pained frightened squint. And after a moment...

"H...h..ell..pp" came the stuttered groan of a reply.

Lucius patted John's hand.

"I'll take that as a yes." he grinned.

Sarek was scared.

He sat in his quarters watching as Carson slowly moved through the room looking at his store of herbs with a strange look on his face.

The man had barely said a handful of words since the time he spent alone with Lucius, since the dark night when Lucius had ordered Sarek to sew the man's mouth shut. Two guards had held the terrified man down on the ground, his room trashed in the earlier struggle, and with Lucius looking on, Sarek had completed the task.

The stitch work was horrible, the noise the man had made during it before passing out, unforgettable.

Lucius had told Sarek that the man would be called Arex from now on and how he had screamed way too much for his liking, so to shut him up and to avoid hearing the man's odd speech impediment he had ordered this done. Some time with his mouth closed for good would make the man understand that it was better that he was seen, not heard.

Sarek knew the Sovereign was a violent man, vindictive even…but this...he could never imagine this…

After completing his task, his blood-stained hands a reminder of what he had just done; Sarek had stood over the unconscious man, knowing for sure the foreigner would get the gist.

How could he not?

Even weeks later, with his sutures removed and the rumours spreading throughout the manor of the strangeness of his speech, the quiet man became even quieter; his muteness almost making him seem to fade from everyone's presence.

The servants were still talking about that night when the Sovereign's son had tried to run off with the healer.

Could you believe it?

Right in our quarters too!

He was out of his mind!

Lucius had ordered Sarek to start teaching the healer about the herbs that he had stored in his quarters and what they were used for.

Maybe he'll put them to better use than you.

Those last words had terrified the young doctor. Mute or not, he was sure the foreigner already knew much more than he did; and if Sarek taught him about his medicines, then Sarek was pretty much sure he'd be out of a job.

And one did not leave the employ of Lucius Daravilus, except by death; a natural one or by his will.

Sarek swallowed heavily.

"So...maybe this is too much for you?" he asked hesitantly.

Carson turned to him and shook his head, then turned back to the wall of bottled herbs taking time to study their labels.

"Thought you didn't want to stay here...that you wanted to go back to your Atlantis." scoffed Sarek, truly hoping that the man would just disappear or die and silently dreading that he would remember it was him who had hurt him so badly.

The stitch marks were fading but still made Sarek flinch every time he saw them.

Carson twitched slightly, then made his way over to where Sarek was sitting.

His eyes at first roamed everywhere except Sarek's face then suddenly he was staring straight at him; his blue eyes almost piercing the young healer's soul. And at that moment Sarek was sure that the man knew it was him who had hurt him.

They stayed like that for a moment, the stare, a cacophony in the silence; then Carson slowly turned and went back to examining Sarek's wares leaving the young healer breathless, his emotions battling within.

…

"Nahkhan..?"

…

"Nahkhan, open your eyes."

…

"Nahkhan!"

A hard smack across his face and John's eyes snapped open, head bobbing back then rolling into his chest, it took a moment for him to raise his head and start to focus on his surroundings.

He was in a large chair, his wrists and ankles were bound, his clothes had been changed; he was now clad in dark pants and a white dress shirt open at the collar, its sleeves rolled up.

John blinked rapidly at Lucius who stood in front of him rubbing his hands together.

"How are you feeling?" the man's words were mellow, belying the darkness in his eyes.

John opened his mouth to answer, then found that no words would come; he felt like if a tidal wave was crashing inside him; a choking sound emanated from his throat as he subconsciously pulled at his restraints. He continued to blink, brows furrowing at Lucius who was now crouched by his side.

"Okay, let's get this over with." said Lucius.

John twitched in his chair as the man swiped John's sweat stained hair away from his forehead into a semblance of neatness, he grabbed his chin, turning his face left and right and smiling in approval he stood, resting a hand on his shoulder then turned and nodded to a guard at the door.

The guard led in three locals from the village, two men and a woman; all dark-haired and poorly dressed in muted tones, all looking down at the ground as they shuffled into a line standing in front of the chair where John sat.

"Nahkhan." stated Lucius, his calm look directed towards the locals, "I cannot have any more confusion about who you are...do you understand me? That time is over."

John stared at the locals then up at Lucius, the words still not coming.

"Tell them who you are." ordered Lucius.

A wash of images flooded through John, but he found he wasn't sure about anything anymore.

Lucius nodded to a guard who pulled out his weapon and shot the first local, who fell dead at John's feet.

John flinched his eyes widening at the blood pooling around the body of the dead man.

Lucius' grip on his shoulder tightened.

"Nahkhan, these people are relying on you knowing who you are, their very life depends on it." Lucius' gaze never left the locals as he spoke.

John stared at the two remaining locals who trembled in front of him; the woman chancing a look up, with tears in her eyes…

Please she mouthed silently.

John felt the storm in his mind building, tightening around him.

His mouth opened in shock and suddenly, the words came…

"S-stop..." he stuttered, his body twitching uncontrollably. "I…"

Lucius nodded at the guard who aimed and blew the local woman to her death.

The terror-filled eyes of the one man left standing found John's.

"My lord, my lord...tell him! You're his son...you're his son! Please!"

Guards held the man on either side as he struggled in fright.

Panting, eyes wide and glazed, John turned to Lucius who finally looked at him.

"It's the only way." Lucius' voice was calm. "I tried everything else, but you won't let go of your delusions. You are and have always been my son, but you turned away from me."

Lucius crouched in front of John. "I want to be proud of you again" he whispered, warmth in his eyes.

They stared at each other for a moment then John felt something in him, shift…

I want to be proud of you again…

He had been proud of me?

…and fall away.

He blinked, a long sigh escaping him and a curtain slowly moved aside in his mind showing what he could not see before; it seemed so clear now.

"Father?" his voice was soft, questioning; when Lucius smiled at him nodding, he continued.

"M-my name is Nahkhan..."whispered John, his voice hitching, confusion and acceptance at war inside of him.

"I-I'm sorry…I-I'll make you proud of me again."

"That's all I wanted to hear." smiled Lucius.

He motioned to the guards who pulled the surviving local from the room, the man weeping his gratitude.

"Thank you m'lord...thank you..!"

Then Lucius gently undid John's restraints and pulled him into a hug.

"My son." he whispered.

Shocked for a moment, his face drawn in confusion, it dawned on John that his father was hugging him; something in him said he hadn't felt that in a very long time.

A moment later, he slowly hugged his father back…

It felt good.

-tbc-