I noticed Soryu as soon as he entered the coffee shop. Tall and beautiful, he'd showered and he'd been careful about how he laid his suit down when we'd undressed earlier. He was neat and clean, I was covered in dried sweat and sex and wearing clothes that were rumpled from lying on the floor for hours. He smiled at me as if he didn't even notice.
"Is it okay for me to join you?"
When I nodded he sat down, his eyes taking in the coffee gone cold and untouched muffin that sat in front of me. "You've been doing a lot of thinking," he said, looking up at me, his gaze warm and gentle.
"Yeah. Uh…" I wasn't ready to talk. "What have you been doing?"
"I talked to Baba and then went to speak with Hitomi," he replied.
"Hitomi?" I raised my eyebrows in surprise. "Why would you need to talk to Eisuke's sister?"
His eyes searched mine for a moment before he sighed and said, "Well, Olivia really did fuck up when she made contact with Hitomi."
"What does that mean?" I asked, staring at him in confusion. "Eisuke didn't really want to see his sister?"
"That's not it," he explained. "We don't know for sure why Nikaido was keeping Hitomi, but it was certainly to use her as some sort of tool. Now his tool's been compromised. We don't know what will happen if Hitomi goes back. They might kill her, but Nikaido's organization is deep in sex trafficking. It seems likely that he would put her to work in a brothel to force her to 'repay' the money that was spent to raise her and keep her for all these years."
"Shit," I said, feeling my skin crawl as I digested what he'd said. "Does Olivia know? Where's Hitomi now?"
"Hitomi's in a room in the hotel with guards posted at the door," he said. "I'm sure Eisuke's explained the situation to Olivia by now."
"You're right that we fucked up," I said, horrified. "We seriously fucked up. What's going to happen?"
"It all depends on what Hitomi wants. She's in no shape to be making decisions about her future right now. Her entire life was just stolen from her. She was raised as part of the family by one of Nikaido's men. She's lost her family, her friends, her job. It's going to take her awhile to get over this," he said. "I know that Olivia thought she was doing something great for Eisuke, but that's far from the truth."
I glanced up at the ceiling, imagining Olivia up in the penthouse. She was probably heartbroken. "I'm worried about Olivia. She thought Eisuke would punish her for escaping for a few hours. What will he do to her for ruining his sister's life?"
"It's actually even worse than that," Soryu said. "Apparently when the guards reported that she was missing, Eisuke thought that she'd left him. Baba said that he's never seen Eisuke as irate as he was this afternoon."
"Oh God," I said, remembering that I'd told Eisuke that Olivia was thinking about leaving him. "What is he going to do to her?"
I started pulling out my phone to try to call her, but Soryu stopped me. "You don't have to worry that much. He loves her, even if it's in his own fucked up way."
I nodded, trying to push the fear and sadness that I had for Olivia and Hitomi to the back of my mind. "I'm sorry that I didn't call you," I said. "You're right that I should have done that first. We were behaving like kids. All excited about our plan and not thinking at all about how it would affect anyone else."
He sighed. "I was in a meeting with my phone turned off all morning. I wouldn't have gotten a phone call anyway. And we've fucked up ourselves. I shouldn't be the only one that can track you with my phone. Olivia and Chisato weren't trackable but you were. As soon as I got out of the meeting, I was told that Olivia and Chisato were missing. The guys didn't know that you were with them."
I listened quietly as he spoke. The fear that he'd felt was evident in his voice.
"Eisuke was sure that Chisato was helping Olivia run away from him, but they couldn't rule out the possibility that they'd been kidnapped. If the target was Olivia, there was a good chance that they would dispose of Chisato fairly quickly. That's the news that I was greeted with when I got out of my meeting. Adding the fact that you were with the two of them, just made things more complicated. If the target was Olivia, had they killed you and Chisato? If the target was you - or really Mei - then were Olivia and Chisato gone?"
My stomach sank as I realized just what I'd put him through. I reached a hand across the table and he took it, lacing his fingers with mine and holding on tightly.
"You were at least still wearing your tracking device, so I could track where you were. I could see that you were in a moving vehicle, but I didn't know what that meant. Were you really just helping Olivia escape from Eisuke, or had someone disabled you to the point where you couldn't push your panic button?" he sighed and shook his head. "Thankfully, you called Eisuke not long after that and Baba called me to report that you were all okay and heading back to the hotel. I didn't have to worry about you for long."
"I am so sorry," I said, tightening my grip on his hand. I couldn't find the words to tell him how much I regretted making him worry, making everyone worry.
"I want to get out of here," he said. "I want to hold you again. What do you want to do? We can spend the night in the suite or I can take you home. At the townhouse...well, you know it's your decision whether you spend the night in my room or yours."
I'd been sitting in the coffee shop struggling with the concept and reality of love. I was overwhelmed and frightened by the extent of how much he loved me. I'd seen it when we were having sex, how much he loved me had been in his eyes and in the way that he touched me. Although a part of me was happy that he felt so strongly for me, another part saw his feelings as a net that would ensnare and suffocate me.
My own newly discovered love for him felt like a splendid betrayal of my own heart and soul. Something that had been kept hidden from my conscious mind until I'd been wrapped in his arms and it was too late to escape. This was everything that I had never wanted. I'd meant to tell him that I needed space. I'd been ready to go back to my dorm room and spend the night far away from him, getting some distance, easing my panicked mind, running away from the intensity of our feelings.
There was no way that was going to happen now. He was hurting. I'd hurt him and the urge to take him in my arms and comfort him was too strong to deny. It crowded out the need to escape, pushed it to the edges of my mind. This was it then. How simple it was for love to take control, for my needs to fall away and be replaced by his. The realization that I'd been caught in the same trap as my mother caused pain to flare within me, and my instant response was to look to him. He was my comfort and my strife.
"Let's go back up to the suite," I said, watching the smile that spread over his face.
How long would I be able to turn off my thoughts and drown my fear in him?
"I'm hungry," Soryu complained.
I sighed and stretched. It was the second night since we'd brought Hitomi back to the Tres Spades. Soryu and I had returned to the townhouse after spending the first night and the following morning in the suite. Soryu had had some business to attend to and I'd made dinner for everyone, but we'd mostly spent our time in bed.
"Are you sure?" I asked, lazily rubbing my palm across his chest. "You ate a lot at dinner."
"You're draining all of the energy out of me," he replied. "I need to replenish. I want two omelettes. I love it when you make me eggs. It makes me so happy. It's like a normal happiness in all the craziness. You're omelettes are filled with normal happiness."
I gave a little laugh. "I guess I can't tell you no, then. Of course I'll make you some food. Just give me a few minutes, I don't feel like moving." I traced my fingers down to gently rub his soft cock.
"Don't try to distract me," he warned. "I won't be able to get it up until I get some food."
"That sounds like a challenge, but I won't accept it. I told you I'm going to feed you. I'm just admiring you. Your cock is the biggest I've ever seen in person," I said. "I'm kind of becoming obsessed with it. It's probably a crime against nature that you've been keeping it in your pants"
"Hmm," he murmured. "The one and only woman that I've made love to besides you cried when I tried to put it in her."
I winced. "Is that why you've stayed away from women?"
"Not exactly," he said. "It was the first semester of my freshman year in college and she was my first girlfriend. I'd gone to private boys schools my whole life. She cried, but she insisted that I make love to her anyway, even though I thought we should stop. Three days later she told me that she was pregnant."
"That isn't how it works," I said.
"I didn't know that at the time," he explained. "She was frantic and insisted that we get married as soon as possible so that her father wouldn't know she'd gotten pregnant out of wedlock. I wanted to do the right thing by her and the baby and was ready to do whatever she asked me to do. Eisuke was the skeptical one. He did the research and made me take her to a doctor to confirm the pregnancy while I was present. Of course, she wasn't pregnant. She'd just been trying to snag a rich husband."
"I'm so glad Eisuke came to your rescue," I said with a laugh. "I didn't realize that you guys had been friends for so long."
"We've actually been friends since middle school," he said. "After I broke up with that girlfriend, I started looking at women in a different way. I'd already seen the fighting and conniving between my father's mistresses, now I could see that when women looked at me, what they were really seeing was my bank account. All of them except this crazy woman who seemed to only want my body."
"How did you know that?" I asked. "I could have told you I was down to fuck in an attempt to trap you."
"First, I'm sure most women realize that it isn't going to be easy to trick a man who's almost thirty into getting them pregnant," he answered. "Second, a file was made for you and analyzed by Ran Nitta before you were asked to join the organization. I knew you avoided relationships, which is why I was having trouble figuring out how to get you to date me. I don't have any practice at it and you avoid it. I felt pretty hopeless there for awhile."
I frowned. I didn't know what to address first, dating or the fact that there was a file on me. I should have guessed about the file, considering how thorough Soryu and Eisuke tended to be about everything, so I decided to shrug it off. If there was a file then Soryu had decided to love me knowing full well that I was promiscuous and a little crazy. That put the responsibility on him and meant that I wasn't going to have to reveal a bunch of dark secrets from my past. Instead, I was going to have to share my current thoughts.
"I think I'll need a break tomorrow night," I said using a businesslike tone. "I can spend a night in the employee dorm to get a little space."
"That's fine," he answered without hesitating. "I'm meeting with Eisuke after lunch. You can come to the Tres Spades with me."
"Sounds great," I said, raising up on my arms to look down at him. "Is it really that easy? Are you really okay with me disappearing whenever I want?"
"Well, I wouldn't call it disappearing as long as you're telling me where you're going," he said. "And this is normal, isn't it? When people date, and even when they're married, they don't have to be glued to each other. While I'd love for you to be with me as much as possible, I respect your need for space. You work out for yourself what makes you happy."
"That's… That's really nice of you. I want to go make the eggs now," I said, climbing off the bed and pulling on my clothes. I needed some time away from him to think about what he'd said.
My understanding and views on relationships were obviously much more fucked up than I'd realized. Taking a break by spending a couple of days in the dorm wasn't the same thing as my father disappearing for days, weeks or months without a word. It was normal for couples to spend time away from each other. I'd heard women complain many times about too much overtime resulting in them only being able to see their boyfriends once or twice a month.
Taking time and space away from him was normal. It was okay. He wasn't going to be angry or unable to cope if I wasn't there and I would be able to handle it, too. Our relationship didn't have to consume us. I could take the time to figure out what would work for me, and we could take the time to figure out what would work for us.
I sat down the bowl of eggs that I was holding and gripped the edge of the counter. It hurt to think these things. They were the opposite of what I'd always believed and they didn't fit easily into my mind. The idea of looking at things in a new way was scary. I didn't know if I could trust it, I didn't know if I'd be able to let go of what I'd always held onto, and if I made mistakes I could hurt Soryu, hurt myself, damage our fledgling relationship.
We were both inexperienced at making relationships work. Were we really going to be able to make a success of this? Would he have to be forever patient and making concessions while I dealt with my craziness? Was that fair to him? Would it make him hate me in the end? Would I start to resent him because I would worry that he was secretly upset about the time and space that I needed? Wouldn't it just be easier to call off everything now, before we came to hate each other?
'Fuck,' I said to the empty room. It sounded like I really was fucked up enough to need to talk to Ran Nitta. I really had no interest in doing that. Running would be so much simpler.
"I have a job offer for you," Soryu said. We were in a car heading towards the Tres Spades.
"Really? A new mission already?" I asked, very surprised. I'd been fucking up so much it wouldn't shock me if the guys thought I couldn't be trusted to run to the corner store to get snacks.
"Not a mission, a job," he said. "Eisuke's been wanting to set up an underground poker game in Dubai for a long time. The current dealer here in Tokyo is excited about emigrating and take on the position. Eisuke and I both think that you would be the best replacement."
"It's just dealing? Why me? There are a lot of people in the casino with a lot more seniority than I have," I pointed out, feeling suspicious. Was this just a way for Soryu to control me?
"You're already in Eisuke's organization and even the casino director said that you're the best dealer he's ever seen," he explained. "This job is different from working in the casino, it's very high stakes. It isn't the same as standing behind the blackjack table flipping over cards. It can get very tense. We know that you can handle yourself and you'll be able to read the players and spot signs of cheating. And right now we don't know of anyone else who can do the job. If you don't want it, we'll have to put plans on hold for starting a game in Dubai."
I thought about his words for a few minutes. "And that's the job? Just dealing a poker game?"
"It actually involves more than that and the pay is very good - more than a floor manager at the casino. There are usually between four and eight games a month. You'd be responsible for scheduling the games and managing which players will be attending each game. You'll also be part of the process for determining if a new candidate for the games will be accepted. You'll be given a file from the investigative team to review in order to make those decisions. You'll also have an assistant. Hayashino isn't a dealer, she just helps with managing the games," he said.
"That sounds like quite a promotion," I said. I knew that I should be jumping at the chance, but the offer seemed to good to be true. "Are you sure you aren't just offering this to me because you like me?"
"I don't like you, I love you," he said, his voice matter-of-fact. "If you had to choose someone else from the casino for the job, who would it be?"
I thought about my fellow employees. "Ikuni is a really good floor manager."
"You've been away from the casino for a few weeks. You aren't texting with the people you used to work with? Ikuni was stealing from the casino, he was fired a while ago," he said.
"Oh, I had no idea."
"Besides the fact that we don't think there's anyone else capable of doing the job in the casino, the casino expansion is going to be complete in a few months. We'll need to promote people in the casino as we hire new employees to fill in the new positions. Like I said, it's you or it's no one. At this point Eisuke is not ready to look for someone from outside the Tres Spades," he said. "You don't have to make a decision right now, but I think you should take the job. The pay is excellent and the hours are flexible. You'd still be able to make meals at headquarters."
I laughed. "You're just worrying about not getting your eggs if I go back to working at the casino full time."
"I would miss your cooking terribly and so would the other guys. And don't think I'm not going to pay you for cooking for us. It's a job and you'll be compensated."
I nodded, falling into silence as my thoughts took over. I felt like I was standing on the threshold to a new life. Loving Soryu, being involved in a relationship, getting a new job or even two. Mostly, I was thinking about the cards. They'd been a huge part of my life since I was a child. I'd spent untold hours shuffling cards and learning tricks. I always had a deck of cards on me, and if I got nervous, I would often shuffle them to calm myself down.
Except lately I hadn't been doing that because I'd been pretending to be Mei. I hadn't been working in the casino. I hadn't been shuffling and dealing cards. If I took this new job, I'd only be dealing a handful of games a month. Cards would be taking a backseat in my life. To my surprise, I felt ready for that change. I felt tears pressing behind my eyes, tears of relief. If I did this, I was going to be letting go part of the sadness and fear from my childhood that I'd been carrying along with me. It wouldn't all be gone, there was so much more waiting inside of me, but this much I would be able to get rid of by simply taking a step towards my future.
I didn't have to worry about controlling the game anymore. I didn't have to worry that gambling would consume me if I wasn't constantly on my guard. I could turn away and give myself space to breath. Space to work on the new challenges that life was throwing at me.
"I'll do it," I said, the words escaping my lips, slipping out between the jumble of worries and fears that tumbled in my mind, setting me on a new path.
Soryu's cell phone rang as soon as we stepped out of the elevator on the top floor of Tres Spades. We stopped in the vestibule outside the front door of the penthouse and he exchanged a few words with whoever was on the phone.
"Sorry, Sakiko. I've got to get out of here. Simon Lee is in Tokyo. He didn't even give me any warning. His representative is downstairs waiting for me. I'll be back as soon as I can. Hang out with Olivia or whatever. I want to at least meet for dinner tonight, so I'll call and let you know what's going on," he said and gave me a quick kiss before he stepped back into the elevator.
I stood for a moment staring at the closed elevator doors. I was decidedly not happy about him suddenly leaving, even though we were supposed to split up anyway when he went to talk to Eisuke and work on the Hitomi issue. It was somehow different when it wasn't part of the plan, especially since I didn't know exactly when I'd be seeing him again. I felt like a spoiled child, ready to throw a tantrum because things weren't going my way.
'God, I need to get over myself,' I thought as I used my fingerprint to unlock the door to the penthouse. When I stepped inside the great room was empty. Even Mamoru wasn't in his napping chair. I stood quietly looking around, waiting for security to inform someone that I'd arrived.
In less than a minute a maid appeared from the hallway that lead to the kitchen. "Excuse me, Miss. Is there something that I can help you with?"
"Is Olivia in?" I asked, my mood going from casual to extremely suspicious in the blink of an eye as the maid's face betrayed that something was wrong.
"Ah...I think Olivia is not receiving guests right now," the maid said, shifting her eyes and backing up as I walked towards her.
"You think?" I asked. "What does that mean? Where's Olivia?"
"She's resting in her room right now," the maid said, but I could see the uncertainty in her eyes and hear it in her voice.
"How long has she been in her room?" I asked. "Don't tell me she's been in there the last couple of days?"
The maid's eyebrows flicked up, letting me know that my guess was right before she glanced over my shoulder and visibly relaxed. Before I could turn around, Eisuke's voice rang out. "Stop scaring my staff, Sakiko. What with you and Mei running around the penthouse, I think I'm going to have to get security to protect the maids from my guests."
I turned around to look at him, he was just stepping down the last few stairs from the second floor, dressed in his usual three piece suit and a smirk. "Don't fuck with me right now, Eisuke. What's wrong with Olivia? Why hasn't she come out of her room?" I'd begun trembling with anger.
"Let's have a little chat," he said, leaning against a wingback chair, looking like he was posing for an ad in a fancy magazine. "It seems that I need to remind you once again that you are my employee. You answer to me and you follow my orders. If Olivia is planning some little scheme, you are to inform me immediately."
I made sure my mask was in place as fresh guilt washed over me. "I'm very sorry, Eisuke. We obviously had no idea that finding Hitomi would cause such a huge problem. Please don't be too hard on Olivia, she was only trying to help you. Whatever you've done to her-"
"I don't think you're listening to me," Eisuke's voice was as cold as ice. "My top priority is Olivia's safety. Therefore, if she's cooking up some hairbrained scheme, I depend on my employees to let me know. If her intentions are harmless, I can let her have her way. If she's heading towards danger, I'll be able to stop her. All of this falls apart, however, if I can't depend on my employees to inform me of her intentions. Do you understand?"
I stared at him as I processed his words. Soryu had said that Eisuke wouldn't do anything to hurt her. Eisuke was saying that her safety was his top priority, so why was she hiding in her room? "Yes, Sir," I said. We were battling each other, each trying to slip behind the other's poker face. "Are you telling me that she's okay?"
"Of course she isn't okay. This morning I had to tell her that she fucked up when she brought Hitomi to me. She's extremely upset about it. This could have been avoided if you'd done your job properly." His eyes scanned up and down my body with calculated contempt. "It seems that Soryu's method of teaching you your duties by tenderly fucking you isn't working. Just remember that the next time you fuck up you'll be demoted to cook and bed warmer at Ice Dragons headquarters. I won't be giving you any more chances."
Okay. So if I'd had a knife, I probably would have stabbed the bastard. Instead, I reminded myself that he'd basically told me that Olivia was okay, he prioritized her feelings, and he was giving me one last chance to prove myself. If he was anyone but Eisuke, he probably would have found a nicer way of saying all that, but you can't expect much of the asshole. He was who he was.
"I'll be sure to report everything Olivia's says to me in the future," I said, realizing that was probably what he'd wanted from the beginning. I also thought it was time to change the subject. "Is Mei around?"
"I don't keep tabs on Simon Lee's little succubus," he said, giving me a bored look and gesturing his hand in the air before he turned and went back upstairs without another word.
The same maid showed up a minute later and looked at me warily.
"Is Mei in today?" I asked sweetly. It wouldn't do to piss off Eisuke's staff, especially since I was one of them.
"She hasn't come out to eat yet today," she answered. "Maybe she had another late night?"
"Yeah, probably. Thanks," I said and turned towards the hallway that lead to Soryu's apartment. I'd been avoiding Mei since she'd involved me in her plan to run away, but now I wanted to talk to her. I wanted to know how her night with Sanjou had gone and if she was thinking about marrying him. Soryu had admitted that he was basically just making up new bachelors to keep me near him. If Mei wasn't going to marry Sanjou, she needed to head back to Hong Kong. That would be at least one thing that we wouldn't have to worry about anymore.
I let myself into the apartment, but there was no answer when I knocked on the bedroom door. I frowned and rolled my eyes, preparing myself for whatever ridiculous mess I was going to find when I opened the door.
But there wasn't a mess. The bed was made and the room was empty. I crossed to check inside the bathroom, but she wasn't in there either. I turned around to walk out of the room, worry beginning to make my pulse race, when I saw a white card on the vanity. When I picked it up to read it, it simply said: "I have gone to have some fun. I will return when I have had my fill."
I immeidately raced out to the great room and yelled, "Security!"
A door that I'd never paid attention to opened up and a man stepped out. "Can I help you, Miss?" he asked calmly.
"Mei ran away. When did she leave? Were you guys not watching?" I asked frantically.
The guard opened the door behind him and said something to whoever was in the room. He turned back to me and asked, "Are you sure that she ran away? She goes out nearly every day."
"Of course I'm sure. She left a note!" I waved the note around. "You guys have cameras in here. When did she leave? How long has she been gone?"
The guard put his head back into the room and said something about footage. I ran over to the stairway that led to the second floor and yelled, "Eisuke! Eisuke come down here!"
I turned around to see that the guard was staring at me with wide eyes. I'd called down the big boss and he was scared shitless.
Speaking of the big boss, I'd already failed my 'call Soryu first' promise. I pulled out my phone and tapped his name. As the phone began to ring, I saw Eisuke walking down the stairs with a frown on his face. By the time he'd reached the first floor, Soryu's phone had gone to voicemail. I remembered that he'd talked about turning his phone off for meetings, and slipped my phone back into my pocket.
"Mei ran away and your guards did not even catch it," I said accusingly, watching as Eisuke's face went from disinterested to coldly furious.
"She's been going in and out with her guard and Mr. Baba or Mr. Kisaki regularly," the guard said, trying to cover his ass. "We'd relaxed security because of that."
"Is that what you were instructed to do?" Eisuke asked, a snake waiting to strike.
"No, Sir," the guard said. He was probably thinking about how much money he had in his bank account and wondering if it would last him while he looked for his next job.
Another guard popped out of the room and said, "She left yesterday morning with her guard."
"Yesterday?!" I had to restrain myself from throwing something or hitting one of them. As I opened my mouth to start cussing them out, Eisuke's phone rang.
The call was brief and to the point. I watched as Eisuke's face darkened. By the time he hung up, his eyes were flashing with fury. "Mei told her father that she ran away last night and he flew directly to Tokyo. The Bell Crickets are now in possession of Soryu and plan to kill him if we don't find and return Mei within seventy-two hours."
"Sakiko!" I was running towards the front door to the penthouse when Eisuke's voice stopped me. I turned to look at him, panting with panic. "Where are you going?"
"I've got to go find Mei and save Soryu!" I yelled back at him.
"By yourself? And do you even know where you're going?" he asked.
"I'll figure it out and call Kyoichiro to send me some help," I said.
Eisuke narrowed his eyes at me and said, "Keep me informed."
"Yes, Sir," I said and spun around to dash out of the penthouse.
