Jace*
clary has not talked to me since the day after we were setting up the club. now that I think about it Magnus hasn't either. I've tried calling her and texting her and I've tried to get a hold of Magnus so he could tell me that she's ok but they haven't answered. I should see them a tomorrow night for me and alec's party that Magnus insisted on throwing and im trying to make sure everything will be ready for when I leave. my foster dad is coming back the day of my birthday and he has no idea whats coming. I've been packing my stuff and im suppose to take it all over to the club when I go to the party. I sprawl out onto my bed and decide that I need to get some sleep. I wake up the next morning and text Magnus saying that im coming over to help set up for the party.
'no its going to be a surprise' -m
'well can you at least tell me why you and clary have been ignoring me' -j
I don't get an answer so I decided that that ill just wait until the party.
clary*
I have been ignoring Jace. I cant talk to him right now. I haven't slept since that night. I woke up screaming the next morning and crying. im scared for the party. I don't know if I'll is able to give Jace anything special for his birthday. I don't know if I can do anything. I can feel an ache in my chest all the time and I can't take it anymore. I try to think about the fact that he can't hurt me anymore. he's dead. I shot him. it's over. valentine doesn't want me home and the only person that did is gone. I don't have to go back. I never have to go back.
jace*
I can't stop thinking about clary. im starting to worry. magnus didn't answer me when I asked if she was ok and it's not like either of them to ignore any of us. apparently, he hasn't talked to alec or Izzy either. clary hasn't talked to any of us either including Simon which is really weird. I need to talk to her now. I grab my shit and ride to the club. I make it there in record time and im surprised I didn't get pulled. I burst into the door feeling the rage bubbling up and all I hear is clary scream and Magnus running from upstairs. I rush to clary and wrap my arms around her and see Magnus enter the room. "what were you thinking when you came up in here like a fucking animal" he shouts and I feel clary tense. what the hell happened to make her start reacting to everything like this again. I make a shushing face telling him that he is making her more upset and he instantly regrets his outburst but I have no doubt that he knows what happened and was just being protective. I pick clary up off the floor and sit us both on the couch. she has stopped crying and feels less tense. "clary what happened?" I ask soothingly but still stern. she looks up to Magnus and I can see them communicating with there eyes silently. magnus nods his head and clary sighs. "Jonathan found me," she says. I immediately feel something more than rage coursing through me but I keep calm for clary's sake. I swear I will find him and kill him if he touched her again. I nod reassuringly to tell her that she can keep going. that I won't get angry and I won't judge her. "he came through the door and started yelling so I ran upstairs trying to find a way to get him out of here" she says. well, that explains why she freaked when I almost busted the door down. "he threw me off the balcony then got back down here and said I was coming home. he beat me and then dragged me outside. we only lived a couple blocks from here and there was hardly anybody outside and anybody that saw us ignored us and whoever didn't he told them that I was having a schizophrenic episode. eventually, he got sick of me screaming and hitting him that he dragged me into an ally" she chokes a little and I know what happened. "he...he hurt me again and it was way worse than the last times. I managed to get away long enough that I could get to my bike. we had only gotten to about a half a block away from the club and my bike was parked around the corner of the ally. I grabbed the gun that I kept under the seat and tried to run after I put it in the waistband of my jeans. he grabbed me again and dragged me back to the ally. he hurt me again and I couldn't get the gun because he had me pinned to the cement. when he was done he got up and looked away. I couldn't go back to that place and I couldn't let him hurt me again so I shot him" she said. I see a mixture of regret and relief in her tears rimmed eyes. her cheeks were covered in her tears and then I noticed the busted lip and the small bruises covering her arms and the few on her cheeks. I can only imagine the rest of her. I swear if the bastard wasn't already dead id kill him. "Magnus found me in the ally and we made sure no one could trace it back to me and then you called the next morning and I just couldn't talk to you and not tell you everything and I didn't want to just dump all of my shit on you and I was embarrassed and I felt like a dirty whore and I felt like i I shouldnt even try talking to someone I dont deserve and so I just started ignoring you and I made magnus swear not to tell anybody and im so sorry" she says. I can't believe she thinks that way about herself. I hold her and let her cry more. I should have been here keeping her safe. but I wasn't and swear I will try to make that up to her for the rest of my godforsaken life "clary you are nothing like you thought. you are amazing and if anything I don't deserve you.
clary*
jace seems like he is angry but he is obviously trying to keep his cool for my sake. when I stop crying we start setting up for the party and then Jace and I went to take a nap before the party started. I feel safe in his arms but also nervous. jonathan used to hold me like this when he was done with me but I never felt even remotely safe when he held me. I feel almost completely safe with Jace and now that Jonathan is dead I feel even safer. I hate to think that but he was my personal hell for years and now he's dead and he can't hurt me anymore. I eventually fall asleep to those thoughts and the nightmare isn't terrible as usual but they aren't fun either.
"you thought you could kill me, Clarissa," he says "well you were wrong" he adds. he throws me to the ground and kicks me repeatedly he starts punching me and slapping me and then drags me back up by my hair. there are no walls or doors or anything its just empty black but he manages to pin me to something and slam my head into it multiple times. he throws me to the ground again and starts to unbutton my pants. I scream my head off and then the blackness and he is gone
"Clary. its ok it was just a dream" Jace says. I don't let tears fall but I know ill probably lock myself in the bathroom later and let them flow. "you ok?" he asks "nevermind. you're not ok. why don't we skip the party and stay in here" he says "no Jace im fine. it was just a nightmare. I don't want you to miss your birthday party. especially not for something this stupid. I promise im fine" I tell him and we go out into the main area where the party is starting. I can't wait to give Jace his not sexy present since I don't think I can give him a sexy one I went a got him something that I think he will like. we all start drinking and dancing. at the end of the night we give Jace and Alec the gifts and then I start getting nervous that he won't like it. he opens it up and the first thing he does is grin and then he hugs me tight. "this is amazing" he says. I look at the picture I gave him. it's all black and white except for our eyes and hair. its a slightly far away picture of us sitting on the beach in NC holding hands and smiling. you can only see one side of our faces because we are facing each other and just gazing into each other's eyes. everyone looks at the drawing and they all love it. alec starts opening his gifts and when he reaches the one from his sister he confused. he pulls a slip of paper from a little box and he looks like he's trying to put something together. "that is the address of max's current foster home" Izzy says. "you found him?" alec asks sounding shocked "yea" she says with tears in her eyes. "holy shit" he says and hugs Izzy with bone-crushing force. Izzy told me about max at one point but the way she talked it sounded like he had died but I guess when she said gone she meant that they didn't know where he was. they both look like the happiest people ever. when all the gifts are open and everyone is done eating we all decide to sleep here tonight. jace and I went to my room and we crashed onto the bed. jace held me like he did earlier and when I tried to kiss him he wouldn't let me push myself to do anything I didn't want to. "I don't need a sexy gift or anything like that. I am happy just sleeping right here with you in my arms" he said. "I love you," he says. I am shocked. how do I know he's not just saying it because of the alcohol. "and im not just saying that. I really love you" he says as if he could read my mind " I love you too,"I tell him. he grins the biggest fan I've ever seen and kisses my forehead. we fall asleep in each other's arms. when we wake up we don't move except to go get some breakfast and then he has to go home that night so he can pack some more. I lay in bed and think about him until I eventually fall asleep again.
jace*
I am walking home because if I pull up on my bike the neighbors will tell my foster dad about me getting home at this time. I decide to stop and climb onto the roof of Raf's place I look over the city and I spot a white head of hair that looks angry and he starts banging on Raf's door. I walk downstairs to where Raf is at and see him open the door. "Valentine, what are you doing here?" Raf asks and im ready to rip someone's lungs out. "where is my daughter. I know that Jonathan found her and I know she's the reason he disappeared" he shouts "hey man no need to yell. clarissa isn't here" I tell him knowing he would suspect something if I said, Clary. " I know she is. I bet your the one who has been messing with her and the reason my son is gone" he yells and then he's coming after me. "he lands a punch on my nose but im not about to let him find clary. I punch him in the nose and then Rafael is by my side holding me back. valentine start beating Raf and then he pulls a knife. the next thing I know im on top of him and he trying to slit my throat grab the knife from his hands and sling it across the room. I get pulled off of the floor and then me and Rafael are hitting valentine and he is doing surprisingly well. I see him pull another knife as I land a punch on his face. the knife flies out of his hand and his head hit the beer tap. his body doesn't move and all I can focus on is the metal beer tap halfway in his head. "shit we gotta call Magnus" I say after about 10 minutes of silence. "call him and tell him to hurry" Rafael says "we cant tell clary she will blame herself" I tell him "im not going to argue with that" he says. I call Magnus and he comes over with a crew of guys who clean up everything and take the body to get rid of it. "how are you going to get rid of everything?" Rafael asks "acid," Magnus says "you guys are so dead," one guy from the crew says "why?" I ask "because Valentine was the leader of one of the biggest gangs in new york," says Rafael. "and now that he and his son are both dead that means that clary will be sent for to take over because of their 'disappearance'" Rafael explains "why not Sebastian?" I aks "because he was exiled. that's why he left new york" Rafael says "shit" says Magnus "how long until someone sends for her?" he asks "it will probably be around three days until they decide to take that measure and probably another to track her down unless you guys want me to go ahead and tell the gang that he's dead and I know where she is" Rafael says "no shes got a lot going on. give her a few days of normal" I tell them. "ok" Magnus and Rafael say at the same time. I decide that I can pack later and that I should go spend time with clary "by the way Jace. if this changes the way you feel about her then don't go near her don't text don't call just leave. don't tell her that you don't want her because it will crush her more to hear that than it would if you just disappeared" Rafael says "it changes nothing. I still love her and I don't plan on leaving until I die. if anything it kind of makes her sexier if that's even possible" I say with a smirk. he chuckles "alright. now everybody out I need sleep and so do the rest of you people" he says. we all leave and I and Magnus walk back to the club. when we get there I go to the club room and hold her as I fall asleep. I can't believe all the shit that keeps going down. it's crazy. but as long as I have her I don't give a damn.