jace*
its been two days since the incident with Valentine and I have spent them both with Clary. we packed at my house some and she insisted on cooking every meal for everyone. so every day we all go to the bar and clary cooks while we watch tv because she refuses to let us help her. clary is definitely doing better. at one point she tried to make out with me and I politely told her that she didn't have to but she said that she was going to make out with her boyfriend whether I liked it or not. rafael said the gang is deciding tomorrow whether they should keep waiting for him. he said that if they decide to keep waiting that he's going to tell them that he is dead because if they don't have clary as the leader then they will trace it back to me and probably kill me. he eventually admitted that he used to be a member of the gang but was let go when he promised to keep valentine's secret. I get broken from my thoughts when clary leaves the bathroom and crashes onto the bed next to me. we are currently at my house because Magnus has no hot water at the moment so we shower over here. she has on my t-shirt and a pair of black, lace underwear. I have to admit she looks sexy as hell but I'm not going to push her unless she wants to. we start packing some more after I force clary to put on some pants. we are joking around and laughing until I hear the front door open. I make clary hide in the closet while I handle this. I walk into the living room to find Michael looking partially drunk. he throws a beer bottle as soon as he sees me but misses by barely an inch. " I thought you were coming back on Friday," I tell him "I had to come back early but I'm leaving this afternoon. go get me a beer you piece of shit" he says. I do as he says but only so clary doesn't have to hear him beating the shit out of me. he walks towards his bedroom and I suddenly feel like the biggest idiot ever when he passes my room and sees my bags. "where do you think you are going" he shouts he throws the beer bottle at me and I duck but hit the floor in the process. he starts kicking me and when I see him about to hit me with a glass statue he suddenly falls to the floor. in his place stands a five foot two redhead holding a baseball bat. "holy shit are you ok?" she asks "yea I'm fine. damn red if I had known you could swing a bat like that I would have taken you to the field" I tell her "stop joking and let me look at you" she says " she lifts up my shirt and glances over the forming bruises. she applies pressure to each of my ribs to check for a break then looks at my bloody lip and nose "come on let's get your stuff and leave so I can clean that up at Magnus'" she says "ok go ahead I'm going to get his money" I tell her "ok" she goes to my room and gets the only two bags of clothes I grab Michaels wallet and grab the wad of cash he keeps in his top dresser drawer and the one he keeps in his bathroom. I grab my small bag of a picture of my old family and will and Tessa and the few books I got over the years along with the letters and postcards I get from Tessa and shove the money in there. we manage to carry my stuff on our bikes and when we reach Magnus' clary forces me into the bathroom and starts cleaning my face with a washcloth. she puts two butterfly band-aids on the small cut on my cheek and then she sits us both on the bed in her room. rafael said that I have to tell her about Valentine before the gang comes to get her and I have been trying to find a way to say it. "hey we need to leave for Rafael's in about 45 minutes" she says "ok but I need to talk to you about something first" I tell her. I need to tell her now so she can be prepared "what is it?" she asks "um. valentine came looking for you at the bar the other night" I admit "holy shit how do you know?" she asks "I was there" I admit "and he started yelling and Rafael and I tried to get him to leave. a fight broke out and I pushed valentine and he hit his head on a beer tap" I tell her "he didn't make it" I admit "so he's dead?" she asks. I nod my head. she nods again and she looks conflicted. "ok is that it?" she asks. I shake my head and dread my next few words "apparently Valentine was the leader of the biggest gang in new york and apparently Sebastian was kicked out and since Jonathan and he are dead they need a new leader and its suppose to go to the next person in the bloodline" I tell her "so it's going to me?" she asks "but I can't lead a gang I don't know anything about it" she says "I know I'm sorry" I tell her "he said I would be important but this is not what he could have meant" she says "I'm sorry" that's all I can say. I can't speak another word "dammit" she says as she crashes onto the bed and cries "its ok" I say as I hug her to myself. she cries in my arms for the rest of our free time. when she is done she forces me and her to go over to Rafael's to cook lunch for everyone. she makes me drive us over there and then makes hamburgers for us and then we all sit and watch tv. we decide that Rafael will stay closed tonight and we will all hang out and drink. clary eats and then goes to take a nap upstairs. I go with her and I choose not to sleep so I can stop her nightmares before they start getting bad. I hate it when she has them because that is something I can never protect her from.
clary*
I was in my backyard with my gun that Valentine gave me in my hands aimed at a bird sitting in the old tree behind my house. "now fire" he said. the bird moved at the sound of his voice but I was not going to get a trip to the attic because of a stupid bird. I followed it and then I shot it from the sky. my hands moved from the kick of the gun and I almost hit myself in the face. the bird hit the ground and Valentine had a grin on his face "good. now shoot the other bird" he said. I aimed and shot and I was ready for the kick this time so the gun didn't move and the bird fell from the tree. "good. you will be important one-day Clarrissa. so I can't have you dying" he said and then he left.
I shot up in bed from my sleep and Jace was immediately there. "you ok?" he asked "yea just a weird dream" I said "I need to go start on dinner" I told him. I went to the kitchen and made pork chops and passed out plates to everyone. we ate and drank for a while and I just sat back and chugged a pint of vodka. when I came up short with the bottle I went to get another and stumbled the whole way. I sat back down and started drinking another pint. I took it slower because Jace was watching me. when I was halfway done I was lifted from my seat and was in someone's arms. I looked up to find Jace. " what are you doing?" I ask. "we are dancing," he said. I noticed that everyone was slow dancing with their partners except Rafael who was just laughing at me and Jace. Jace put me on my feet and began leading me in a slow dance to one of my favorite songs. if the brakeman turns my way by bright eyes. "whats wrong?" he asked "nothing. why?" I slur. "because you are drunk off your ass and it's only 10:30," he says "its nothing," I tell him. " it's not nothing," he says. I sigh in defeat. " it's just", I sigh again. " I can't get any of it out of my head. I mean. jonathan came and hurt me and now he is dead. valentine came after you and now he is dead. I don't know if I should be happy or upset" I admit "why can't you feel both?" he asks "because feeling both is too confusing. it's too damn much" I tell him "hey look at me," he says "you are too strong to let this get the best of you," he says "I won't let this get the best of you. I will help you the whole way" he says "I don't care if you are the scariest gang leader to ever live. I will still love you" he says "I love you too," I tell him. he picks me up as the song ends and he lays me on the bed and then lies down beside me. I snuggle up to his chest and his arms wrap around me. we fall asleep like that and it makes me feel more clarity and love that I have ever felt before.
jace*
I wake up with clary in my arms and a small headache. I know she will feel a lot worse. I gently roll away from her and grab a bottle of painkillers and a glass of water. I set it on the table next to her side of the bed and then crawl back in next to her and wrap my arms around her again. I feel my eyelids get heavy and notice that it's still dark out. I dropped out of school so I don't have to worry about that so I just go back to sleep.
clary*
my father and brother stand in front of me and only Jonathan has the usual evil grin on his face he lunges for me but is cut short. I see Valentine throw his son into a deep darkness and turn back to me. " Clarissa. I was definitely not the best father but I still loved you. I'm sorry for letting your brother hurt you. I only ever wanted you to be able to survive this cold world. its ripped too much from the both of us and that is not an excuse. don't let anyone hurt you again and don't let anyone gets torn from you like your mother" he said "you will have people that you will grow to love and will want to protect them with your life. you will kill for them. you will steal from them. and you won't want to take back any of it if it means they end up ok do you understand me?" he asks. I nod my head and then he disappeared. I sit in the darkness crying my eyes out and I don't bother waking up from this dream its the best one I've had considering all the others were my worst nightmares.
jace*
I hear clary sobbing and I immediately try to wake her. she jolts awake and the tears instantly stop. she wipes the remaining ones away and snuggles into my chest. "did I wake you up?" she asks "no" I lie. "liar" she says. "I was awake earlier and I didn't go back to sleep all the way," I tell her. "ok," she says. "so the meetings going down today right?" she asks. I told her about it at dinner last night and she seemed to calm down a little bit after that until she started drinking. "yea. rafael said that depending on how it goes down they will either come to find you today or tomorrow" I tell her "will you stay with me?" she asks "I wouldn't go anywhere else" I tell her she snuggles deeper into my chest and we lay there for a while. I play with her wild curls and she seems a lot better than she did last night. "I've got to go make breakfast," she says. I think that's her way of distracting herself. "ill come to help you" I tell her. "fine but you cook the bacon and that's it" she says. "but only because I hate the grease popping all over me" she adds. I follow her to the kitchen and start on the bacon. she finishes the sausage and eggs around the same time I finish the bacon. she decides to make toaster waffles because she says its too messy to make the good ones. she puts everything on serving plates and puts them on the large coffee table in the VIP room we always eat and hang out in. she goes to start a pot of coffee while I grab plates, napkins, forks, and knives. she leaves the kitchen with the pot in one hand and a bottle of syrup in the other. while she attempts to put that on the already full table Simon comes out of the hall and plops onto the sofa. he fixes his plate and starts eating claiming he needs to rid himself of his nasty hangover. I went to mine and clary's room to put on a shirt for breakfast and notice that Clary didn't take the painkillers so I know she must feel like pure shit. I grab them and get two of them from the bottle. I bring them out to her and she gladly dry swallows them. we both plop onto the couch and fix a plate of food. Izzy and Rafael come from the hall and do the same. " I feel like shit," Izzy says "well dizzy Izzy made an appearance last night what did you expect," Magnus says he enters the VIP area. we all laugh and continue eating. magnus fixes himself and alec a plate knowing the man will be here shortly. alec eventually plops himself onto the couch and we all eat while watching some reality tv show. "so Raf what all is going down today" clary asks as she starts stacking empty plates to be brought to the kitchen sink "well the gang is going to have a meeting and if they think they should keep waiting for valentine, which is probably what will happen, then I'm going to tell a trusted member to let them know he is dead. when he tells them then they will start by going around town asking who has seen you lately. they are probably going to start here since this is where you work. I'm going to tell them where you are and someone will come to pick you up" he says "wait what is going on?" Izzy asks "apparently I have inherited a gang," Clary says. "how?" alec asks "Valentine and Jonathan are dead and Sebastian was kicked out of this gang a long time ago" clary explains "how did they die?" asks Simon. clary goes silent. magnus looks to her questioningly. she nods and Magnus sighs. "Jonathan broke into the club and he hurt clary. clary shot him in self-defense" Magnus explains "oh my god" Izzy says. I see tears form in her eyes "when did this happen?" Simon asks "what about Valentine?" alec asks. "it happened the other night," Clary said. "Valentine happened three nights ago" I explained "he broke in here and a fight broke out. he hit his head and died" I told them "why didn't you tell us?" Izzy asks clary. "I was embarrassed and I only found out about Valentine yesterday. it was a need to know thing" she said "oh my gosh Clare I'm so sorry" Izzy said as she skooched closer to clary and wrapped her arms around her "so what are you going to do about the gang?" alec asks "run it" Clary said nonchalantly. "girl its ok we will still love you even if i have to bury a body" Izzy says. "thanks girl. i love you guys too"