My body was heavy. I knew we were no longer in space. The eerie silence within the ship made it clear the Kylo was gone. Alone again. Maybe that is my life story, to be alone. Even though I could feel nothing but still air I had to make sure. "Hello?" My voice creaked out of my throat. Silence answered like I had assumed it would.

I woke up and stretched my body around. Too stiff to actually walk, I moved my shoulders trying to get some resemblance of how I could move. I was wearing the completely wrinkled black silk that fit more in my white solitude then it did in this seemingly militarized ship. I awkwardly walked to the front of the ship, each step is easier to maneuver. All I saw was green.

Trees and sunlight and bushes and plants and leaves. I needed the air on the outside of this ship as I had never needed anything before. I ran to the door and it opened to an increasingly chilly burst. The air was crisp and musky, a relief from the antiseptic recycled air that had been my only friend. I walked out of the ship and goosebumps covered my body. The dirt was softer than I thought it would be. I could curl my toes and feel life under my feet. It wasn't metal but real ground. I felt free. My hand raked against the rough skin of the giant tree around me. I walked feeling the ground, touching everything I could like a child. I could hear chirping surround me but nothing animal moved around me. It was sweet chime murmuring something I could not understand. It was a sound so natural I wanted just to listen and be.

Hands gently wrapped around my waist and a deep sigh nestled at my neck. I wrapped my arms around my waist covered large scarred hands that rested there. Comforting warmth circled around those hands and pressed at my back. A current was flowing through me creating a pleasant hum from my toes to the top of my head started from where lips were touching my neck. I let out a whimper when it stopped.

"We need to get back inside." The voice dark and luring whispered so close to my ear.

"I like it out here." I subtly begged to stay. Everything felt better out here. The air whipping against my skin, the hands hugging my center, the breath against my neck, the sun peeking through the trees and even the smell surrounding me. I was happy and content.

"I know but we need to go back. You will do something you regret."

"No," I whispered.

I could hear the smile in his voice. "Yes. Back now, or I won't stop you from acting on whatever ideas are in your head." His hands moved from my waist to my hips to turn me around. I was letting him have control. I didn't want to stop him. I wanted him to do those things that may or may not be in my head. I bit the bottom of my lip looking at his lips.

"No." And I kissed him. My hands traveling up his body, grasping everything I could to get him closer. I wanted more. I needed more.

"Rey," he growled deep within his throat. I wanted this. The need was pulsing through my body. A kiss was not enough and I was craving his touch everywhere. He kissed back, his teeth brushing against my lip.

"I need you. Ben, please." He immediately pushed himself back.

"What did you say?" His voice colder than it should be.

"Come back. I need you." I whimpered. The incredible longing to have him touching me.

"What did you call me?" He grabbed my hand and it felt like poison running through my veins. We were walking towards the ship. It looked like vines were already growing against the metal exterior.

"I want to stay out here. With you." His demeanor softened and pulled me closer and whispered for me to wrap my legs around him. I followed his orders. He held me in place and walked to the ship. A low moan escaped his throat and heat was tracing everywhere where I was touching him. "Please," I begged against this torture. The door of the ship closed behind us.

He pushed me against the wall and kissed me hard and fast like he would never kiss me again. Then he stopped. He let go of the hold he hand and placed me on the bunk and walked to the other side of the room. He walked in a small line back and forth, let up a sigh, and walked back to the bunk. I went out to touch him and he grabbed my hand.

"Why did you call me Ben?" Looking at me like he was peering into my soul.

"It just slipped out. It felt so right." I went out to touch him again but he held my hands in place on the bed. "It just felt like a dream. In my dreams, I call you Ben. Let's go back outside."

"You have to resist it, Rey." My name was warm on his lips. "I won't be able to resist it much longer and I don't know how long the effects will last."

"I don't want to resist."

"Rey." He said like a breath. "I'm sorry." His hand had come up to my head and all I felt was complete darkness take hold of me.

When I woke up, I felt weak and disoriented. Memories of sand washed over my mind like a never-ending desert in front of me. The memory felt so real and so close. Sitting, looking out of the desert. If I could just think a little harder I might know what it meant. I grabbed my head to try to soften the throbbing that had taken residence since I woke up.

"Kylo?" I called out not really expecting a response. "Ben?" I don't know why I really used that name. Something so familiar about it on my lips and his response. Oh no, his response. What happened before? I was walking outside and just this need to be close to someone, anyone. I had goosebumps on my arm and electricity pulsing through my veins. I remember his hand outstretched and me falling asleep.

I wanted to scream and yell and throw a tantrum. I had been taken out of one room and placed in another. I am living by his rules, by his power and he once had said I had the same power. I reached my hand and the plate on the table slightly jiggled in front of me but a pain throbbed in my head immediately. I knew I had power. I used the power to see into his head. He had told me I was a fighter. I can fight.

I walked up to the giant window at the front of the ship and stared. The vines had crept around the window but not touching it. The window had a clear film almost completely covering it.

"We have to get out of here." I heard from behind me. I turned around to face this man. I felt like he kept me trapped. "How are you feeling?" His voice lingered slowly on each work almost hesitant to let them out.

"How am I feeling?" I paused. "Like I have been kidnapped and taken along with some outraged monster who kills everyone that is in front of him. I don't know what power you are using to make me fall in love with you but I know I am not that kind of person. I know that I never killed anyone off of a whim. You killed your own father and I know you can and could have killed me. I don't understand. I wanted you so bad but I wasn't thinking. You told me you were my enemy. That I should hate you and now I do. I am tired of this game."

"I can't make you fall in love with me." He looked down. "The plants here secrete something to make you comfortable and only decrease your resistance. They make you want what you want more. I don't want to control you" The silence seemed to linger on too long. I didn't know how to respond or even if I believed him.

"I can't do this." I managed to whisper. My hand brushed my hair back and closed my eyes. I didn't have the want to even argue with him. "How do we get out of here?" My words short. I didn't want to say anything I would regret again. I hate that I was attracted to his darkness, that I liked it. Obviously, I didn't like the murder and complete disregard of morality but I kept thinking of him and how gentle he was with me. But then how he tortured me and he continues to torture me over and over again. How do I love and hate him at the same time? Why do I want to kiss him? Why do I want to run?

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