The first week at home with baby Jamie was one that Maggie would never forget. Alex was sore, exhausted, and beyond devastated about the death of her father and the rift with her mother, but she was also elated, and completely in love with the new baby. Maggie relished watching the interactions between her wife, their second child and, vitally, Addie, who she swore loved the new addition even more than they did.
Both women had anticipated some jealousy from their elder child, but it failed to materialize. They both made a huge effort to spend alone time, just with Addie, wherever possible, but so often when they were doing so, Addie would break off their activity to check on the baby, or to kiss her softly on the head.
The dog, Gertrude, was equally gentle with the new arrival, and wasn't the least fazed when she cried, or when her own routine was disrupted. Gertie was just happy to be with one or other of them, preferably Addie.
"Mama," Addie looked up at Alex just after Jamie had finished feeding. "When Jamie's all growed, will we be friends like you and Auntie Kara are?"
Alex blinked back tears. She wished she could keep a better check on her emotions, but just in the last few weeks, she felt as though she were missing a few layers of skin. "Of course you will, Bug. And the relationship you have with your sister will be one of the most special relationships you will ever have, and it will last for ever."
"For ever and ever?"
"For ever and ever," Alex agreed.
"You and Auntie Kara have different parents too, just like Jamie and I do, right?" Addie was trying to get things clear in her mind.
"We do, Addie. Different birth parents. But she couldn't be more important to me if we had the same parents. She's the best sister I could ever have."
"I'm gonna be the best sister Jamie could have," Addie declared.
"You already are, Addison," Maggie heard the tail-end of the conversation. She rested her hand lovingly on the girl's head. "Jamie is a very lucky girl. Gertie's getting kinda antsy in the kitchen, you wanna come with me for a quick walk with her?"
Addie nodded enthusiastically.
"It's real cold out, Bug," Alex called. "You'd better find your thick coat, and your gloves and scarf too."
"'kay, Mama," Addie scampered upstairs in search of her clothing.
Maggie knelt down, and kissed Alex very softly. "You doin' okay, Danvers?"
"I'm great," Alex smiled.
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Kit took a deep breath as she entered the bar again. Campbell had told her she was there every Tuesday and Friday. She didn't really know what she was doing here. She hadn't been lying when she told Campbell she wasn't ready for a relationship. But she liked the feisty blonde with the kind eyes, and she felt drawn to her and wanted to spend more time with her. She looked at her watch; it was after 10pm, so it was probably too late anyway. She ordered a single malt – smiling when the bartender remembered her and automatically reached for the Bowmore – and took a sip. Campbell had been right; it really was good stuff.
"Glad to see you're learning," a voice came from behind her, and she felt a soft hand on her shoulder.
Kit looked up and smiled. "I hate to admit it, but you were right. Hey, Campbell, how are you doing?"
"Better now you're here," Campbell said. "I've gotta booth, wanna join me?"
The two women chatted easily, though neither of them mentioned the kiss from last time. Kit tried to train herself not to ogle Campbell's athletic body, but it wasn't easy. Campbell was as easy to talk to as she had remembered. Neither of them suggested dancing this time, and Kit was simultaneously relieved and disappointed. At just after midnight, Kit looked at her watch. "I've got an early shift tomorrow," she said, reluctantly.
Campbell kissed her softly on the cheek. "I've enjoyed getting to know you, Kit. Though I still don't really know anything about you," she realized that was true. "I don't even know what you do."
Kit grinned. "I'm a cop," she said, as she reached for her jacket.
"The long arm of the law!" Campbell teased. "That must be fascinating. I wanna hear all about it."
"Friday?" Kit didn't want to sound too keen, or too pushy.
"Wouldn't miss it," Campbell agreed.
"So are you going to tell me what you do?" Kit asked.
"You have to guess. I'll give you two guesses a day. Text me. If you've guessed by Friday, the drinks are on me all night."
"And if I get it wrong?"
"You'd better remember your wallet, officer."
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"But Christmas is coming," Kara said to Kate, her heart breaking as yet again Eliza had refused her entry to the house, after days of not answering the phone.
Kate approached Kara from behind and held her in a warm embrace, resting her head on Kara's shoulder. "I know, honey. But she's made her choice."
"It wasn't Alex's fault. She had no choice. Eliza doesn't seem to have any idea what this is doing to Alex."
"And to you," Kate said, softly, turning Kara in her arms so that they faced each other. She hated the sad look on Kara's face. "We've just got to enjoy what we have. And we'll keep trying. We can't do any more than that."
"Alex is so sad. This should be the happiest time of her life. Eliza hasn't even met Jamie."
Kate held her close. She knew only too well what it was like to lose her mother, but Kara had now lost two, as Eliza wouldn't forgive her for siding with Alex. And Kate's mother had never been good to her; for Kara, the loss was greater.
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Aoife's heart filled with pride. Ellie had just walked from one end of her studio to the other, just using two canes. Every day, she gained in strength and confidence. And her new physio was great, putting her through her paces. She was especially skilled in hydrotherapy, so their pool was very useful. Ellie promised never to go in on her own, but fortunately Aoife was there 90% of the time, and of course Kit was always keen to take a dip after a shift, so Ellie was getting plenty of practise.
"I'm gonna be on just one cane by Christmas," Ellie swore.
"That's only three weeks away," Aoife cautioned. "You don't wanna get ..."
"One cane," Ellie said firmly. "You wanna make a bet?"
"Bet against you?" Aoife laughed. "Not on your life. I've made that mistake before. Last time, it cost me a whole box of potstickers."
Ellie lowered herself into a chair. She caught Aoife's hand, and pulled her down into her lap.
"Careful," Aoife didn't want to hurt her wife.
Ellie gave her 'the look', and Aoife held up her hand in mock-submission. "Can I help you with something?" she recognized the look in Ellie's eyes, and her heart soared. Intimacy had been put on hold in the past few weeks, while they concentrated on Ellie's recovery. And if Aoife was honest with herself, it had been the last thing on her mind. She only cared about Ellie getting better. The rest would come.
Ellie grinned. "They told me I should practise my fine motor function," her voice was teasing. "I thought I might start with buttons. This one here," she fingered the top button on Aoife's shirt. "I think it's a good place to start," she fumbled slightly, smiling as it popped open. She made swift work of the next three buttons, and pulled the shirt to the side. "Well, would you look at that," she smiled widely. "No bra."
"You know I rely on you for anything other than a sports bra," Aoife smiled, gesturing to her own crippled hand. "I could go get a sports bra, if you'd prefer?"
Ellie reached for her again. "You move now, and I'll sue."
"Sue for what?" Aoife teased.
"Breach of contractual obligation," Ellie said. "I mean, you told me if I put a ring on it, then I could..." she gasped as Aoife kissed her deeply and thoroughly.
After a few minutes, Aoife pulled back, pleased at the stunned look on Ellie's face. "Still wanna sue?"
Ellie shook her head. "I can think of something else I'd rather do," she pushed Aoife off her lap, and got carefully to her feet. She allowed Aoife to put her arm around her waist. "Get me to that bedroom, wife," she commanded, giggling as Aoife mock swatted her.
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"I can't believe you thought I was a tennis coach!" Campbell teased as soon as she saw Kit.
"That wasn't my first thought," Kit defended herself. "I said teacher. Then lawyer."
"So you think I'm smart," Campbell was privately pleased.
"Oh I know you're smart," Kit replied. "Or why else would you choose to hang around with me?" she laughed at the look on Cambell's face.
"At least one of us is smart," Campbell said. "Because the other one is buying the drinks tonight, remember?"
"Only if you tell me what you do," Kit was intrigued. None of her guesses had come off.
"Physiotherapist," Campbell watched Kit's reaction.
Kit nodded. "I knew it would be something physical," she spoke before she realized what she was saying.
"Why's that?"
Kit went red, and tried to hide her embarrassment. "You don't get a body like that by accident," she admitted.
"Smooth talker," Campbell was pleased. "C'mon. I'm in the mood to dance tonight."
Kit could tell that Campbell was full of energy. There was no harm in dancing; the music was fast and energetic, and the other women were just having fun. They would sit down when it slowed. They were both being careful not to overstep the boundaries of their tentative friendship.
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"Whassat?" Alex didn't know what was happening. And then she felt it again. Gertie's cold nose against her foot. Gertie licked her foot, and whined.
Alex sat up, and watched as Gertie moved to the doorway of their bedroom, and waited impatiently. She whined again. "Gertie? What's going on girl?"
Alex shrugged on a robe; the night was cold. As she approached the dog, she set off for Addie's room. Of course. Addie. Gertie had started sleeping in her room.
Alex's face fell when she stepped in Addie's room. The child was curled up in the corner of the bed, shaking, frightened whimpers audible. Her face was covered in sweat, and Alex couldn't quite tell if she was awake.
Alex sat on the edge of the bed, and reached out and put her hand just next to Addie, not wanting to frighten her by touching her. "Addison?" her voice was soft. Addie just rocked from side to side, her trembling increasing. She was muttering to herself.
Maggie appeared in the doorway.
"Bug? It's only me," Alex risked putting a soft hand on Addie's back. Addie jerked, and cried out. Then she looked up, and seemed to come awake. Her face was blotchy, her pajamas soaking. Alex realized that she must have been in this state for some time. Her nose also told her that Addie had wet the bed, something she hadn't done in over a year. She rubbed her hand gently on her back. "It's just us, baby girl. You don't need to be scared. We're here with you, Addie. You're safe."
Addie's face crumpled, and her breathing became more panicked. Alex drew her into her arms. She still wasn't allowed to lift anything heavy, so she was very careful. She felt the child tremble as she buried herself in Alex's front.
Neither Alex nor Maggie had ever seen Addie so disconnected during a nightmare. They realized that this one was a deep one, and knew they had to be very careful not to distress the child further.
Maggie left to run the tub, returning five minutes later, to see Addie still curled in Alex's arms, clinging to her. She still hadn't said anything, but fear was written all over her face. She was as white as a sheet.
Maggie sat next to them on the bed. "Mama's going to get in the tub, Addie," she said softly. "And I'm going to lift you in there to join her. Mama can't lift you right now, 'cos of the scar, remember? You'll feel better in the warm water. We'll get you all clean and warm, and then you can come and sleep with us, can you do that?"
Addie looked up, seemingly noticing Maggie for the first time. "I don't feel good, Mommy," her voice was so small and scared that Maggie just wanted to cry.
"I know, baby girl. I know. Is your tummy bad?"
Addie nodded, miserably. "And my head."
"You think you're gonna be sick?"
Addie shrugged. "Dunno."
Alex cradled her lovingly. "It's okay, Bug. If you get sick, it's all fine. We'll take care of it. How about that tub?"
"'kay, Mama," Addie's eyes filled with tears.
Maggie lifted Addie very carefully, pleased when she felt the little arms around her neck.
Alex climbed into the tub in just her boxers and sleeveless tee. She accepted Addie when Maggie lowered her in. Maggie helped to undress the distressed child, and soon she was snuggled into Alex's front, as they both washed and soothed her. Alex could feel her start to relax in her arms, but as she did, she began to weep in earnest, each sob wracking her small frame.
"Did you have bad dreams, Bug?" Alex asked, softly.
Addie nodded, which made her head pound sickeningly. Her weeping intensified.
Within ten minutes, Addie was warm and dry, and cocooned in her parents' bed, one mother either side of her. She was finally calm, realizing at last that she was safe, and that her family was safe too. About 40 minutes later, Jamie woke for her first night feed. They tried to keep Addie still while Maggie passed the baby to Alex, but Addie woke and realized what was happening. She made as if to get out of bed.
"No, baby girl, you're staying here with us tonight," Alex said softly.
"But Jamie needs you," Addie said, already feeling cold having left her mothers' sides.
"There's room for all of us," Maggie slid back into bed, effectively trapping Addie in the bed between her and Alex. She ran a hand down Addie's cheek, and pulled her to her for a hug. "There's always room for all of us. See, Jamie's happy you are here," she nodded to the baby, who was half-asleep, latched to Alex's breast.
"I love you, Mommy," Addie said. "And Mama. I'm sorry."
"You never have to be sorry," Alex reached out and ran her hand along Addie's brow, soothingly. "It's been a rough few weeks. We're all okay now, Bug. You, me, Mommy, and our little Sprout," she smiled as Jamie fell off her breast, emitting a satisfied sigh.
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On an offchance, Kit headed to the bar on Sunday evening. She knew that it wasn't one of Campbell's nights, but she just wanted to get out of the house. Aoife and Ellie were so kind and welcoming, but she was somebody who was used to a lot of time to herself. Her ex had been a doctor, and they both worked unpredictable hours, so she had had lots of time in the apartment on her own. And she wanted to give Aoife and Ellie some privacy, too.
So she was surprised to spot Campbell at her usual booth. The young blonde's body language was different though. She was … slumped. Her customary sharp posture was gone, and she looked defeated, and a little sad.
Kit got two whiskies from the bar, and approached carefully. "In the mood for some company?" she asked softly. She was shocked to see Campbell's pallor as she looked up.
Campbell nodded miserably. Then she shook her head. "M'not very good company," she said, her words slurring a little.
"That's okay. I don't need to be entertained. I'd just like to sit with you. If that's okay. Is that okay?" Kit noticed Cambell fiddling with her left wrist. For the first time, she noticed a deep scar that started near the base of her thumb, and disappeared under her sweater.
Campbell looked at her, her eyes watery. She shrugged. "'kay." She felt defeated. She hadn't felt this bad since … not for months. She had thought that she had managed to put everything behind her. She was wrong. She picked up the glass that Kit slid over to her. "'m already a little drunk," she admitted.
"Then one more won't hurt," Kit tried to keep her voice even. "Cam. Can I do anything to help?"
Campbell looked at her, and saw the compassion and tenderness in her beautiful eyes. She shook her head. "I'll be okay. It's just … kinda an anniversary."
"Is it anything to do with this?" Kit touched her wrist very gently.
Campbell nodded. "She only did it once."
Kit nodded. She could tell that Campbell was skittish, and she didn't want to interrupt her.
"The emotional stuff. That went on for longer. But … she crossed a line with this," she turned her wrist. "I knew... then... she wasn't going to change."
"You got out," Kit encouraged her.
Campbell nodded. She gave a half-smile. "Told you before I had baggage," she tried to shrug it off. "I'm sorry. I'm okay. It just … it's a year, you know? But it's over. Let's talk about you instead. You're much more interesting." She was trying to pull herself together.
Kit smiled. "Of course I am. I think we both know that I am endlessly fascinating," she teased. "But right now. I think, right now, maybe we should get you home. I'm thinking, home on your own couch. A couple of bottles of water. Maybe some cocoa, if you've got those little marshmallows. You can't have cocoa without marshmallows," she smiled as she saw Campbell start to relax a little. "And we could put on a movie. Relax."
"Will you stay there with me? Jus' for a while?" Campbell hated that she sounded so pathetic. But right now, she didn't want to be alone. And the friendship she had with the tall, compassionate cop – that was one of the best things to happen to her for months. Apart from her work, it was the best thing that the city had had to offer so far.
"I'll stay as long as you need. I'm not working tomorrow."
Campbell was docile as Kit guided her to a cab. She was a little drunk, but nothing dramatic. She gave her address to the driver, and then leant into Kit's side, for comfort.
Kit tried not to react to the warm body by her side in the cab. She knew that Campbell needed friendship above all right now. She looked down, and saw that her sweater had slipped. The scar extended at least six inches, and it looked like it must have been deep, if the purple around it was any indication. Campbell was lucky that it hadn't severed a nerve.
She was embarrassed to realize that Campbell had followed her gaze. "We had a fight; she broke the glass door in the apartment. Twenty-three stitches."
"Any permanent damage?" Kit's voice was soft. Campbell shook her head.
The ride up in the elevator was quiet. Kit had a hand around Campbell's waist, more for emotional than physical support. Campbell's apartment was nice; two bedrooms, a cosy living room, modern kitchen. It had a warm, lived-in feel.
Kit persuaded Campbell to drink a whole bottle of water, and she put an unopened one of the table in front of her. "I have a confession to make," Campbell spoke. She smiled. "I don't really like cocoa."
Kit pretended to gasp. "Does that mean you don't have any of the little marshmallows?"
"Not a single one," Campbell said.
"So what do you drink in front of the tv?"
"Single malt?" Campbell knew she was pushing it. "Actually," she admitted. "I rarely drink alone. There's herbal tea in the cupboard, on the left."
Five minutes later, they were both sitting on the couch, sipping their teas. "I'm gonna find something for us to watch," Kit picked up the remote. She put a pillow on her lap. "You," she looked at Campbell. "You are going to lie down and rest. You look like you haven't slept in days."
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Jackie the therapist smiled as the Sawyer-Danvers family trooped into her office. She was still seeing Addie every fortnight, but she had been disturbed by Alex's call that morning, and she had fitted Addie in for an emergency appointment. She looked at the child in Maggie's arms, and realized that she was still shaken, but she seemed content to be with her family.
"So how is it being a big sister?" Jackie asked Addie, once they had settled down to the session. Addie refused to move from Maggie's arms, but she was sitting up and paying attention.
Addie smiled. "It's the best," she said. "Jamie's so cute. You have to meet her. She's with Auntie Kara in the waiting room."
"Maybe you can introduce us once we're done here," Jackie suggested.
Addie nodded, enthusiastically. "Jamie looks just like Mommy. And she gets her dinner from Mama's boobies," she didn't notice when Alex blushed and laughed.
"So you think you are going to enjoy having her in the family?"
Addie nodded again. "Jamie and me, we're gonna be like Mama and Auntie Kara. We're gonna be such good friends. And I'm going to take care of her, just like Mama takes care of Auntie Kara."
"And does Auntie Kara take care of Mama too?" Jackie asked.
"She does. She takes care of all of us. That's why we're a family," Addie said.
"So you got kinda sad yesterday. Do you want to talk about that?"
Addie's face clouded over. She shook her head. "I had a bad dream."
"We had some bad things happen," Maggie explained. "Alex got real sick, and Jamie was an emergency Cesarean. But it's all okay now."
"Grandma Eliza's not talking to Mama," Addie said, unexpectedly. Maggie and Alex hadn't realized that she had picked up on that.
"We're going to try and fix that," Alex said softly, her own eyes filling with tears. "Your Grandma's not very happy with me right now."
"Is that 'cos of your daddy?" Addie asked. Alex was shocked. How had Addie realized all of this? She was clearly whip-smart.
She nodded. "It's like this, Bug. You remember when I was sad at work that time?"
"When you had to shoot that man?"
Jackie tried not to react. As far as she knew, Alex was an FBI agent, so while she was startled, she wasn't shocked. She knew that Alex was not a violent woman, and that she wouldn't take such a decision lightly.
"Yes, Addie. That man had turned bad. He had been taken by some really bad people, many years ago, and although he was a good man when he was taken, they made him into a bad man."
"And he was going to hurt lots of people? Including Mommy?"
Maggie looked startled. Clearly Addie had overheard much more than she should have done. They were going to have to be more careful when they took her to the DEO.
Alex nodded. "I'm so sorry, baby girl. I hated to do it."
"And he was your daddy?"
Alex nodded, crying openly now.
"It's okay, Mama. Grandma Eliza will realize you had to do it."
"I hope so, Bug. I hope so."
"We all love you Mama," Addie crawled across the couch and snuggled into Alex, being careful not to jostle her scar.
"And I love you too. So much."
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"I think Ma knows," Jane said.
"How can she possibly know?" Maura asked.
"We asked her to take the boys for the night," Jane said.
"She often does that. She's a wonderful grandmother," Maura thought affectionately of her mother-in-law. Angela Rizzoli had not only accepted their relationship right from the beginning – in fact, she had done all she could to push them together – she had also given Maura the warm, loving family she had never really had.
"She's also a witch, remember?" Jane teased, as she fiddled with the large syringe. "God, this stuff's gross."
"That's not exactly romantic," Maura teased back. "Remember what the doctor said? It's more likely to succeed if I reach orgasm. More than once would be good."
Jane spluttered. "You are so clinical. I'm aiming for two, maybe even three. C'mon, Maur, have I ever let you down?" she set the syringe on the nightstand. "I think we need to get you in the mood first," she kissed her very softly. "And I think I know just what will do it," she opened the drawer. They rarely used toys, but just sometimes it was fun, and when they were both in the mood for it, it could be unbelievably hot.
Two hours later, Maura collapsed on her back, sweat soaking her body, as she tried to catch her breath.
"What'd'I tell you?" Jane was also struggling for breath.
Maura turned lazily to look at her wife. Her beautiful, naked, wife. "Well, detective, you always were an over-achiever."
Jane grinned. "That's something else I forgot to tell you. It's not Detective Rizzoli any more. You, my gorgeous wife, are looking at the precinct's latest sergeant."
Maura sat up. "You passed! You said the results were next week!"
"I thought they were. I'm as surprised as you are."
"We have to celebrate!" Maura said, firmly.
"I thought we just did," Jane grinned.
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"You're a good friend," Campbell said, as she walked Kit to the door the following morning. She felt so much better than she had the previous night. She had awoken that morning, still on the couch, and with Kit's arms wrapped protectively around her.
Campbell squeezed Kit's hand affectionately. "I'm sorry about last night. It just all got too much."
"Any time. You said it yourself. We've all got baggage. I'm just glad I was there."
"Me too," Campbell looked up into soulful brown eyes. "Kit, I know we're not really doing this. But I'd really like it if you would kiss me."
Kit looked at her searchingly. She would like nothing more than to kiss the enchanting woman, but she couldn't bear to take advantage of her while she was vulnerable. But she seemed so much better this morning.
"Please?" Campbell asked, and the last of Kit's self-control evaporated.
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"You haven't even taken it out of the mailbox!" Kara was furious. She was stood at Eliza's door, where she had waited for four hours for Eliza to return from God only knew where. She wasn't at work, she hadn't been there for weeks.
Eliza looked at her sharply. "I am not going to discuss this with you. Not now. Not ever."
Kara held out the DVD accusingly. They both knew that it contained the security camera footage of when Alex had shot Jeremiah. "You don't have to discuss it. But you do have to watch it. It's only 11 minutes long. I'm going to put it on now. And I would really like for you to just sit down there and watch. That would be the easiest way. But if you don't, I think we both know that I am more than capable of forcing you. I don't want to do that, but this family needs you to see it. Alex deserves it. Your new granddaughter Jamie deserves it."
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That night, Kate held a sobbing Kara in her arms. "I know, babe. You've done all that you could."
"I'd never seen it myself. Not before now. Poor Alex," Kara wept. "He would have killed her. He would definitely have killed Maggie. And just for sport. He didn't need them dead. Either of them. He brought me up, Kate. He made me my first pair of glasses. He was a good man," she felt Kate's hand rub up and down her back.
"People change," Kate said, softly. "Cadmus changes people." Her blood boiled. If ever she got the chance, she would do all that she could to bring down the rest of Cadmus. Whatever it took. Nobody had the right to hurt her girlfriend in this way.
"I need to see Alex. And Maggie. And the girls. I need to know that they're okay."
"They're all fine, Kara. But you clean up," she tucked a strand of hair behind Kara's ear. "And we'll go over. I can take Addie out for an hour or so. Maybe take Gertie for a walk, if the snow's not too deep round there. And you can talk to your sister."
"I love her so much, K. She's my family. She's all that's left of the family now. Her and Maggie and the kids."
"Eliza may come around one day."
"I don't think so," Kara said, sadly.
"C'mon. Let's get you cleaned up. Hey, we can share the shower if you want?" Kate smiled softly. She knew that that was a guaranteed way to cheer Kara up.