Rating: K+
Spoilers: Minor time skip shenanigans, stuff from chapter 705
Time frame: It varies
Music Box: I haven't done this for Life's Chapters yet, but I did listen to Someday by Rob Thomas when writing this. Multiple times. Alternately there's the Imperial March from Star Wars, as the working title for this fic was Episode XXVII: Revenge of the Demon
Summary: The four times Robin could have taken revenge, and the one time she did
When Robin left the library she heard the sound of laughing children.
Instinctively she crouched back into the doorway of the great tree, just in case someone threw something at her. Nothing was, and Robin slowly peeked around the corner to investigate the noise.
There it was again, the happy peals of laughter. Now that she was actually listening Robin realized whoever was having such a good time wasn't close; they were just loud. Both curious and more than a little jealous, she crept closer to the sound.
It was the dead of summer and obnoxiously hot. For once Robin was glad her dress was simple and threadbare, for it was cooler than what Auntie forced her cousin to wear. Still, she had been outside for all of two minutes and she could feel the sweat trickle down her back.
All of a sudden the laughter made sense. Some of the village boys had taken advantage of the lake by the library and were swimming. Robin used to sit at the banks and dip her feet in the water when she read. She didn't anymore, not since a particularly mean-spirited boy shoved her into the water, deep enough where Robin almost didn't have the strength to pull herself out again.
She didn't think the villagers knew about a Devil Fruit user's weakness, but that didn't matter. She had could have drowned.
Robin was careful to keep her distance, using duplicate eyes to look ahead for her. Then she a startling discovery: They boys weren't just swimming, they were skinny dipping. In the middle of the day. Robin could only guess that some sort of bet had been involved.
And they hadn't been particularly careful about hiding their clothes.
A devious idea came to mind. These were the boys who made her life miserable, calling her names and throwing things at her when all she wanted was to be left alone. They never were punished, but anytime Robin retaliated they went home and tattled to their parents, who usually would tell Aunt Roji what a terrible person she was.
It would be nice to get back at them for once. The image of the boys running home naked, forced to explain how they had lost their clothes, was funny. She needn't even steal them, just hide the clothes for a little while and then put them back. With her Devil Fruit no one would know.
A bead of sweat trailed down Robin's cheek, dripping onto the ground. The professor would know. The lake was on library property, and he would surely be alerted if anything happened on the grounds. If he found out then he would look at her with disappointed eyes and lecture her about being responsible with her power.
Robin hated disappointing the professor more than anything.
With a small sigh she headed home. Intellectually Robin knew she was doing the right thing, but moral victories did little to make her feel better.
It took six years and endless heartache, but she succeeded. Robin couldn't think about the terrible things she had done to survive, or the horrible things she had seen. This was the first step to realizing her dream.
"I've found it," Robin breathed. "A poneglyph."
It was magnificent, expertly fashioned, without a single sign betraying its age. Reverently Robin traced one of the carved characters, too much in awe to actually read it. Unlike all those years ago on Ohara, she actually knew what it meant to understand these words. In all the world Robin was the only one who knew.
After a while she tore herself out of her trance. Digging out a pad and paper for notes, she began scanning the message that had been immortalized over eight hundred years ago.
It only took a few sentences before Robin faltered. This wasn't the True History. This was directions, telling her the location of a poneglyph that would lead her to an Ancient Weapon.
Knees suddenly weak, Robin slumped to the ground. She heard a little about the weapons when the professor had made his final statement to the World Government, but a small part of her held out hope that they were nothing more than lies, a confabulation by the government to keep the people from searching for the truth. What use did an archeologist have with weapons?
But this stone forced her to see reality. Robin did have the power to destroy the world.
Burying her head in her hands, Robin forced down the bile that was rising in her throat. She didn't want that power. It was too big for one person. She couldn't fathom how big it was. Ten warships and five Vice Admirals were required to destroy just one island. One. And years later the Buster Call still haunted her dreams.
You couldn't see people on the map.
Rolling to her hands and knees, Robin threw up. She took a few shuddering breaths, trying to erase the horror away from her mind. Wiping her mouth, she looked at the poneglyph again.
It didn't look so magnificent anymore.
What would she do? She refused to just give up, not after everything that had happened.
What could she do? That was the terrifying question. If she wanted, Robin could use the weapon against all of the people who had hurt her in the past. She could bring the World Government to its knees and force its leaders to tell her all the information she needed to know. Robin had the power to strike back against her enemies. No one would dare betray her if she had a weapon of that magnitude by her side.
No. Despite what the government claimed, she was not a demon. She hadn't wanted anything to do with the weapons when she was eight years old and striving for the professor's acknowledgement, and she didn't want anything to do with them now that she was a criminal on the run. Six years of wretched misery hadn't warped her that much. Robin stood up, older than she had been a moment a go, but a little bit wiser as well. She read the poneglyph again, this time more carefully.
There were two types of stones in the world: those that held information and those that lead to information. This poneglyph was leading Robin to Alabasta, where she would find the secret of the Ancient Weapon Pluton. It might take years to get there, but she would go to the desert country.
Hopefully there was more than death and destruction awaiting her arrival.
Following the failed rebellion, Robin faced a conundrum: What to do next?
Robin had no clue where to even begin looking for the True History once she left Alabasta. Straw Hat Luffy might have forced her to live, but the fact remained that Robin's dream had sputtered to a dead end in the Royal Tombs.
Theoretically she was free to go wherever she pleased, but with the strong marine presence after Crocodile's defeat her options were severely limited. It seemed ludicrous to even think it, but her best bet for the time being was to ally herself with the Straw Hat Pirates.
But before she did that there was one last errand that needed attending to. Leaning nonchalantly against the back wall of the prison, Robin used her power to spy on her former coworkers. Many of Baroque Work's highest ranking agents were being held in the local jail until the marines could transport them to a more secure location. If the rumors were correct, the lot of them would be shipped out tomorrow, with Impel Down their ultimate destination.
The question was whether or not Robin should save the marines the trouble and kill them herself. Crocodile, in particular, she wanted dead. He was a disgusting human being, incapable of empathy, and willing to go to any lengths to attain power.
He knew of the Ancient Weapons.
And—if Robin were honest with herself—the fact that he had stabbed her probably played a role in her desire for revenge. Robin was convinced he hadn't pierced her heart on purpose. Forcing someone to die slowly while their dreams crumbled around them seemed like something that would amuse the former Warlord.
There was a problem, though. The Baroques Works agents were so closely guarded one would think the marines were watching over Gol D. Roger himself. If she killed them, no matter how discretely, the marines would know in seconds and pursue her. Robin would put her chance at freedom at unnecessary risk.
It was so very tempting to kill him anyway. He was right there, bound in sea stone. Robin would never get another chance like this. She had worked for him for four years, repeatedly betraying what few principles she had left for one chance at the Alabastian poneglyph. She hated him for that, of what she had been forced to do in order to survive. Crocodile knew that, and reveled in stripping away what few illusions about her life Robin had left. He had set out to destroy her, and very nearly succeeded.
But he did not, and Robin was still alive.
Robin grew a mouth in the corner of the prison, right by Crocodile's ear. In a low voice she whispered, "I just wanted you to know that every facet of your plan failed. Your agents are captured, I survived, Straw Hat is free, the bomb destroyed nothing, and the princess is rebuilding the country as we speak. Even the rain has returned." Robin paused for effect. "Enjoy your time in Impel Down. You were just as worthless here as in the New World, nothing more than a second-rate wash up."
Robin wished she could have seen his reaction, but she released her power and sauntered away from the prison before anyone would notice her loitering. There was a boat she had a boat to catch.
"Target located."
"Verifying target. Faxing picture to Baltigo for confirmation now. Do not engage. I repeat: Do not engage."
Robin's mouth went suddenly dry. Confirmed or not, there was no mistaking the man who limped down the street, still wearing a neck brace over a year since she had nearly snapped his spine.
Spandam was alive.
"Miss Robin?"
Tearing her eyes from the man she hated above all others, Robin glared at her partner for this mission, a Revolutionary wearing a raccoon mask. "Why didn't you tell me?!" she hissed. "Why didn't you tell me this is who we were trailing?"
"I-I did," the man said helplessly. "The dossier said we were to get information on the Director of CP9, I assumed you knew…"
Robin ignored the rest of his stammered explanation. How was he alive? Even looking past the fact she had broken his back in three places, during the Buster Call of Enies Lobby Spandam had been hit in the face by Franky, been crushed by an elephant, and shot Usopp's flaming ammunition. For someone so pathetically weak, the combined abuse should have killed him.
The fact that he was still breathing proved there was no justice in this world.
"Miss Robin, please don't do anything rash," the agent begged. "I know you're not officially part of the Revolution, but putting surveillance on this man is important to our plans."
It was almost impossible to hear him over the blood pulsing in her ears. "Do you have any idea what he's done?" Robin asked coldly.
"Yes, but we need Spandam to get to his father."
"His father's still alive?"
"Yes." The relief in the agent's voice was nearly palpable. He continued in a rush, trying to distract Robin long enough to keep her from doing something stupid. "We have good reason to believe that Spandine has been promoted and is now the Director of CP0. Unfortunately, his is more competent than his son and we haven't been able to uncover much of anything. Dragon hopes to use the connection to extract sensitive information."
"Is enacting a Buster Call required to advance in Cipher Pol?" Robin asked bitterly, a leaden heaviness forming in the pit of her stomach. She had only recently learned of the secret branch of CP that specialized in doing the dirty work for the World Nobles. If someone like Spandine was leading them she could only imagine the horrors that had been committed in the name of the World Government
"I know you're upset, and I'm sorry for the miscommunication…but please. We need this."
Robin let out a sigh of frustration. It was true that she wasn't a Revolutionary, but the Straw Hat Pirates weren't due to reunite for another year. She needed to stay in Dragon's goodwill. And it was also true that this would be a golden opportunity. Spandam was the perfect idiot to take advantage of.
"Fine," she said flatly. "But I hope you take every chance to make his life a living hell."
The agent smiled grimly. "I'll do my best, Miss Robin. The Revolution will make sure that he is held accountable for his crimes in the end."
Robin nodded absentmindedly, turning her attention back on Spandam. He had just dropped something on his foot, managing to fall down in the process. Robin took silent joy from his pain. Beside her the den-den mushi rang again, and the agent immediately answered.
"Yes?"
"Identity confirmed. Mission accomplished. Good job, there's a boat waiting to pick you up now with instructions for your next assignment."
"Hey Robin, have you seen my goggles?"
Looking up from her book, Robin glanced at the sharpshooter. It took a considerable effort not to smile, but Robin's poker face was top-notch and she managed.
"No, I haven't. Have you asked Luffy?"
"I did just a few minutes ago, and he just started laughing at me. I'm getting kind of worried. I haven't seen them all day; I even had to do watch just using those lame binoculars!" Usopp glanced around, concerned. "You don't think someone broke 'em and didn't tell me?"
"I'm sure they'll turn up," Robin assured him. "It's probably just payback for all the pranking that's gone on over the past few days."
That only seemed to worry the sharpshooter more. "You're right. Luffy probably did steal them and is planning something terrible! And I don't mean terrible as in 'oh no, we're going to die', I mean terrible like 'oh crap, Luffy makes really bad decisions'."
"Usopp, I'm sure it's nothing," Robin said. "Just a little good natured fun."
"Nooo," he moaned melodramatically. "It's revenge. Luffy's getting back at me for the itching powder in his clothes!"
Robin chuckled. "Are you even sure it's Luffy? If I'm not mistaken, since the last island you've managed at least one successful prank on everyone in the crew."
"You're right," Usopp said, his face contorted in horror. "Luffy couldn't plan something this devious alone. He had help! Chopper must be helping him because of the shaving cream incident."
"I don't believe Chopper had anything to do with it," Robin said.
"Of course! He doesn't have the daring to pull something like that off. It's Nami, for gluing a one belli coin on the deck!"
"Nami already added to your debt and gave you extra chores. It wouldn't be like her to steal your goggles as well."
"Yeah…pranking's not really her style." Frowning, Usopp began ticking off his fingers. "Sanji kicked me for putting sugar in the salt shakers, Zoro gave me a glare that nearly killed me for dying his haramaki, Franky revoked my access to his workshop after replacing his cola with coffee (which, by the way, was hilarious), and Brook actually thought it was cool when I replaced his violin strings with my Special Usopp Super Awesome Strings. He said he liked the sound." Usopp shook his head. "I can't figure out who did it."
"Who indeed," Robin murmured, turning the page of her book.
The implication struck him, and Usopp's eyes widened. Robin smiled demurely just as Luffy rushed out onto the deck, followed closely by the rest of the crew.
"You didn't…"
"I told you!" Luffy exclaimed, "Usopp looks like a raccoon!"
"What!" Usopp brought his hands to his face as a wave of snickers spread across the deck. Silently, Robin took a small hand-held mirror out of her pocket and offered it to the befuddled sniper. It was only then he realized that he had fallen for one of the oldest tricks in the book. "…Eye black around the binoculars," he groaned, "You stole my goggles so I had to use those stupid binoculars!"
"Looking pretty super, bro," Franky said, giving a thumbs up while taking a picture. "Real classy."
"Yohoho, I can hardly believe my eyes…although, I have no eyes! Skull joke!"
At this Luffy lost what little control he had left and began rolling on the ground in mirth.
"Serves the shitty asshole right, all the things he's done to Nami and Robin!"
Usopp looked at Robin piteously, although she could tell he wasn't really upset. "Now look you've done. I bet they don't stop laughing for hours."
Unrepentant, Robin used her power to retrieve his goggles from where she had hidden them, offering them to the sharpshooter as a peace offering. "It took me hours to put the library back in order after you took the liberty of 'rearranging it'."
He grinned enormously, and a small part of Robin relaxed. Even after all this time she had been unsure how he would react to her attempt at 'normal' interaction. It appeared to have been well received, and now everyone was on the deck, laughing, and having a good time.
"You'd better watch out, Robin!" Usopp said in mock-seriousness. "There's no way I'll let such a slight pass! Especially since I know how far your deviousness extends!"
"Of course," Robin agreed, laughing quietly. "After all, what's a little revenge between friends?"
AN: The last little part to this fic was inspired by some other works, namely Prank Warfare by Roseveare (which is an excellent little fic with Usopp and Robin interaction), Game Time by Splatter Fall (which has the whole crew goodness), and chapter 11 of Velkyn Karma's Thirty Tales of a Swordsman (Zoro-centric, of course, but has some Robin as well). Go read all of these stories if you haven't, because they are good.
I also had to Google search prank ideas because I am a boring person who has never pranked anyone ever.