So last we saw, Luffy was left on his own. Ace really doesn't realize how much he means to the boy does he? To be fair, Ace doesn't see any value in his own life what-so-ever anyway so I'll leave you on that depressing note. I feel like this is the chapter that sort of reveals what sort of fic this is and the tone it will have throughout, I'm so mean to these poor boys. Then again, Oda's the one who wrote their backstory and the shitty world they live in so all I'm doing really is building off of that so blame him and not me. The world of One Piece always seems so fun and magical, it's always startling to me when you take the time to think of all the darkness that lies just below the surface of it and it's hard for that darkness not to seep into your writing sometimes. Overall, despite all that there will be humor and levity here and there as well as some good old fashioned fluff. Maybe not in this chapter though. I hope you enjoy.

Chapter 3: Nightmares

It was hot, so hot, and he couldn't breath. He could hardly see through the burning air which caused his eyes to water and his lungs choke. In the distance he could see something, no it was someone. They were so familiar to him, their name on the tip of his tongue... but it couldn't be... Sabo? He took a few shaky steps forward and felt his desperation pushing him further, faster and faster into a run.

"Sabo!" He cried out, desperately chasing after the older boy who was so close and yet so far away. He reached out, his fingers just a hair's breadth away from his brother but suddenly there was a bright flash and Sabo was consumed by the flames. He watched in horror as he slowly burned away in front of him leaving nothing behind.

"SABO!" he screamed tears filling his eyes, "WAIT DON'T GO! SABO!" He began to sob as he knew that nothing he could do would ever bring back his older brother. Screams filled the air, it was the sound of people being burned alive, and he could smell the flesh. It made him sick to his stomach. He looked around wildly, he was lost, lost in the fire that threatened to swallow him whole. Where was Ace, Ace had been with him hadn't he? He couldn't be gone too! Luffy screamed in agony at the thought that his other brother had been devoured by the flames as well. He ran through the fire not caring how the burning earth scorched his feet. And then he saw him, he was laying face down on the ground, the fire licking at his still limbs. He wasn't moving. Luffy ran and knelt beside him, his eyes widening with fear. He shook his older brother gently but still there was no response.

"Ace, Ace you have to get up, we have to get out of here…" he whimpered, tugging on the boy's shirt trying to get him to move, but still he laid there, his eyes shut. Luffy gave a heave and flipped his brother onto his back and screamed. The front of Ace's body was soaked in blood, the liquid began leaking out all over Luffy as though there hadn't been a wound there before. Streams of blood began leaking out of Ace's mouth and nose and his breathing stopped entirely. Luffy looked down in horror at the dead body of his older brother and felt the warm blood seeping through his fingers. He began to scream in terror as the flames enclosed on him and his brother and his vision began to burn bright white.

"ACE!" He screamed sitting bolt upright in bed, sweating and breathing heavily. But no one answered the cry. He was all alone. No, no, he was dreaming right. Ace had been fine, he had come home after the fire. But then where was he? He looked around the dark fort, but Ace wasn't there. "Ace!?" he cried out desperately "Ace where are you, where did you go!?". He climbed shakily to his feet and stumbled out of the fort and into the raging storm outside. He couldn't see anything except for the flashes of light that arced across the sky, reminding him of the angry flames that climbed higher and higher until there had been almost no sky left. It was a dream, it was a dream, but he couldn't shake the surreal feeling the nightmare had given him and the chaos of the storm was disorienting him. He was struggling to breathe again, and he could almost smell the smoke in his lungs that kept him from getting the oxygen he needed. He tried to take deep breaths but his lungs seemed to be spasming and he couldn't get rid of the sense of panic brought on by the foreign atmosphere of the storm.

"ACE!" he screamed again, he had to find his brother. He had to be safe, he couldn't be dead, but the image of Ace's body burning away was fresh in his mind's eye and he could no longer see straight. Ace couldn't be dead, he had promised him, Luffy couldn't be alone, he just couldn't. He began to run, he wasn't sure where he was going or what he was hoping to accomplish, he just knew he needed to see Ace, to make sure that it all really had been a dream. His arms ached but he didn't care, he couldn't see anything through the pouring rain and the tears in his eyes and he began to trip and stumble. He fell down a large muddy slope where he landed heavily on his face. He climbed once more to his feet but he was so rattled he could hardly stand. "ACE!" He called, but no brother came to his aid. Ace would never leave Luffy on his own, he would never ignore him... A cold knife of fear stabbed itself into his stomach, leaving him unable to breathe. What if it hadn't been a dream.

"ACE! WHERE ARE YOU ACE!" Over and over he screamed his brother's name, with no response. Every time the call came unanswered he screamed more desperately until he began to cough and choke. He began running again, the world spinning around him as the thought of Ace being dead slowly wormed its way into his chest with its icy tendrils of fear. He felt his run beginning to falter, he was wearing himself out. He had already unintentionally reopened the wounds on his shoulders and he was bleeding again.

"Ace!" he choked out with a sob, "Where did you go!?". He barely had the energy to even scream anymore, his run was slowly becoming a sort of dazed limp. He began to lean heavily on trees as he passed them, and he began coughing up blood as he had shot his vocal chords with his screams. He looked around, he finally knew where he was. He was nearing the tree fort he, Ace and Sabo had built together. He looked up blearily and saw it sitting there in the distance, he swore there was a faint glow emanating from the windows. Maybe Ace was hiding there, maybe he wasn't dead after all. "Ace…" he whispered under his breath, barely able to get the word out. He began to move faster. His tired, disoriented mind had come to the twisted conclusion that Ace must be in there and if he wasn't then he must be dead. Luffy had never been so scared in his life as he climbed weakly up the side of the tree to reach his brother. Spurts of blood shot out of his reopened wound but he didn't care, he had to know that Ace was okay.

"Ace…" he mumbled throwing open the trap door. The room was lit by a small candle, flickering warmly and gently. He scanned the whole room and there he was, relaxing against the back wall of the fort, some girl in his arms. Luffy hardly cared about what was going on or why he was here, all that mattered was that he was alive.

"Luffy!?" Ace cried out in shock, the girl turning to stare at him with wide eyes, "What the hell are you doing here!" A flash of anger lit up Ace's face, "You're not supposed to-"

"ACE!" Luffy's voice broke as he screamed his brother's name one last time. He was alive, he was really alive, he flopped onto the floor and began sobbing, the relief too much for the twelve year old to handle. His entire body was shaking and blood was beginning to pool around him. He tried to get to his feet but he just stumbled forward landing heavily on his brother and he clung onto him for dear life, terrified that if he let go he would find out that Ace really had died. Luffy buried his face in the teenager's chest and began sobbing so hard that he nearly passed out.

"Luffy what's wrong!?" Ace exclaimed stunned at the boy's unusual behavior, he pulled him away from his chest to look him over for injuries, "did something happen, are you hurt!?" and then he gasped when he finally noticed the bleeding arms. Luffy refused to let go of his brother so the instant Ace released him from his grip he snapped right back into place with his face buried in his chest. It took ten minutes for Luffy to calm down long enough to form words, but he was still hiccuping and shaking violently. Ace was now holding Luffy close to him and gently rubbing his back to calm him down. The girl just sat next to them in a stunned silence, clearly not sure of what to say.

"What's wrong, Luffy?" Ace asked softly, appearing much calmer than he really was. Finally Luffy pulled away from his brother so that he could speak, but he was still sputtering and coughing from the heavy crying so it took him several tries to get the words out. He looked into Ace's concerned and very much still alive brown eyes and felt himself calming slightly.

"I was in the fire again!" He wailed, his voice horse and cracked, Luffy noticed Ace's face tense slightly and he hiccuped a few more times before he could continue, "it was hot and-and I couldn't breathe, and S-Sabo was there, but he was burning!" Ace's entire body seemed to go rigid at these words and he grimaced slightly. He let Luffy let out a few more sobs and embraced him tightly. Then Luffy pushed away ready to continue his story.

"You were gone, but when I found you…you...you were…" he paused here, unable to say it "I-I woke up, but you w-weren't there so-so I was afraid that you were burned up by the fire too-" Luffy's entire face twisted up in pain as he said this and he almost started sobbing again but he caught himself and continued. "So I had to find you, but I-I got lost and I was really scared that you died cause I couldn't find you anywhere!" At this Luffy collapsed back into Ace's chest, "please don't leave me Ace…" his muffled voice sounded so heartbroken that it hurt Ace's very being.

"It's okay Luffy, I didn't die," Ace smiled at him and ruffled his hair gently "remember, I promised I wouldn't." Luffy took a few more gulps of air, nodded but didn't move an inch and his fingers dug slightly into Ace's back. There was a long pause as Ace waited for Luffy to finally stop crying, at least long enough to allow him to talk without passing out.

"I thought you said you didn't have those nightmares anymore," Ace said softly, Luffy said nothing. His face felt warm from shame as he hid it in his brother's chest.

"I don't…" Luffy lied not letting Ace look at his face which would surely reveal the truth, which was obvious regardless. Luffy was no good at lying and it was in times like these that he wished he was.

"Luffy…" Ace said slightly sternly and Luffy squirmed uncomfortably. "You were lying weren't you, why did you tell me that?" Luffy remained silent, not sure what to say to his brother, he had disappointed him yet again. Why was he so bad at being a little brother!? There was a long silence as Luffy tried to think up a good lie to tell his brother. Maybe that this was the only nightmare he'd had in years, maybe that it was the soup, the soup had been bad and it gave him nightmares. Or maybe it was because he had gotten sick, he experimentally coughed quietly to himself but it sounded about as convincing as any of his other lies. He finally pulled away from Ace and looked at the floor awkwardly. His face was bright red from both the tears and from embarrassment.

"I-I" he stumbled "They weren't too bad…" he mumbled so quietly that Ace had to strain to hear him.

"You wanted me to think you were tough, right?" Ace asked and Luffy reached up and grabbed his straw hat that was hanging from his neck and pulled it down over his head so that it hid his face. He nodded slowly and didn't meet his brother's eyes, still clutching his hat tightly in his trembling fingers. Ace sighed and gently removed the straw hat, softly tugging it from Luffy's hands so he could see the boy's face. His eyes were welling up with tears again and he looked so ashamed of himself that he was going to melt into a puddle of misery on the floor. Ace sighed, so that was the reason Luffy always clung to him, it was those damned nightmares of his. If only Ace had known that, he wouldn't have left the kid's side. Just waking up to find Ace there was obviously enough to calm him down, and now that he had gone to visit Lizzy it was the first time he had woken up to find him gone and he hadn't known what to do or how to calm himself down.

"You don't need to lie to me Luffy," Luffy said nothing but he nodded slightly, and squeezed his eyes shut tightly as another crash of thunder shook the fort. The poor boy was still trembling and hiccuping. Ace gently punched his uninjured shoulder, barely hard enough to make contact and laughed slightly, hoping to calm the frightened twelve-year old. "Hey, come on, there's no need to cry about it, everything's fine. It's just a little storm, there's nothing to be scared of," Luffy nodded again and gave a small wavering smile, he then laughed a little bit in a way that still sounded a bit like a sob. He fell forward again and collapsed against his big brother, his entire body seeming to melt into him as he finally let himself relax.

"I'm just really glad you're ok!" he mumbled and closed his eyes passing out from exhaustion in his brothers arms and snoring loudly. Ace laughed, genuinely this time and held the younger boy closely to him, he kept laughing for several moments as he shifted the boy into a more comfortable position.

"So that's your brother?" Ace jumped, nearly dropping his brother, he quickly caught him, not wanting to wake him up yet again. He had nearly forgotten that Lizzy was there. Her eyes were wide and she was staring at the small, sleeping rubber boy in Ace's lap in astonishment and concern. "Is he ok!?" She exclaimed looking at his bandaged arms.

"Oh yes!" Ace answered, recovering from his initial shock "this is Luffy, he's three years younger than me, and yes, he's fine… although…" Ace looked at the sleeping boy's arms and shook his head in annoyance "...it looks like the idiot reopened his wounds…" He sighed, Luffy was never going to recover at this rate.

"Here, I can get some new bandages," Lizzy offered pulling out a roll of cloth from her basket. Carefully, with Ace's help she removed the old rust colored bandages and replaced them with brand new gleaming white ones that were slowly staining red as Luffy's blood soaked through them. "Uhh...that looks like a lot of blood…" she said biting her lip, "are you sure he's okay?"

"That's normal for him, he bleeds a lot but he'll be fine," Ace shrugged it off. Luffy often injured himself and lost a lot more blood than an average person could usually survive, but somehow the kid could just sleep it off, eat some meat and he would be fine. He couldn't understand it, but it didn't make it any less true. Luffy was sleeping the most sound Ace had ever seen him, he wondered if this might be the first time in a while he had gone without having a nightmare. He had hid it surprisingly well from him, how had Ace not noticed before. Maybe the nightmares had become so second nature to him that he had just grown accustomed to waking up periodically throughout the night just to check if Ace was okay, or maybe this had just been a particularly nasty one.

"What was he talking about… what fire..?" Lizzy began, then a sudden look of realization crossed her face, her eyes went wide as she gasped in horror, quickly covering her mouth. "You don't mean…!?" Ace's eyes darkened and he nodded slightly. "The great fire of grey terminal!? But that was almost five years ago!"

"Yeah, well a seven year old kid isn't going to forget the time he was nearly burned alive because the nobles simply didn't feel like dealing with their mess," Ace couldn't keep the bitterness out of his voice. It had taken him a while to get over the events of the fire as well, but he would never forgive those damn nobles for not only nearly killing them, but for mentally scarring his kid brother.

"The nobles…" Lizzy dropped her hand looking slightly confused "But I thought… I thought… they said it was the Bluejam pirates who…" She stammered a bit, realization slowly dawning on her.

"Yeah, and who do you think paid them to do that," Ace shot, he felt the anger bubbling up inside him. Anger and shame as well that he was tricked into helping them. For years after a nightmare, Luffy would cry about how it was his fault that the fire started, he seemed to take all the blame for the incident upon himself despite the fact that he had only been seven years old at the time. Ace balled his fists, he would never ever forgive them for what they put his brother through.

"No… they can't have… that's too far, even for them!" she gasped but it was clear that she knew he was telling the truth. "I-I remember seeing the fire from my bedroom window… The flames were so bright that they lit up my entire room, anyone caught in that fire would have been incinerated...burned alive… and you're telling me that they did that on purpose!?" Lizzy looked sick to her stomach at the thought, Ace merely nodded. Lizzy took a deep breath, reeling with that knowledge. She seemed to shrink into a ball against the wall unsure of what to feel as confusion, rage, despair and horror all fought to take control.

"You think I'm lying?" Ace shot, unable to stop himself as he felt his rage coiling up inside him like a wild animal ready to pounce at anything that moved, "We saw so many people die that night Lizzy, we barely made it out with our lives." The images of burned bodies and screaming victims began to appear in his mind's eye. "The next day they even sent soldiers to shoot down any survivors," Ace squeezed his eyes shut as he remembered a poor young woman who had been unlucky enough to survive being burned alive and was quickly put out of her misery by several armed men. Her cries for help still rang in his ears. "It was like hell on fucking earth! And all we could do was watch and run for our lives!" Ace's voice trembled a bit, he was barely managing to keep from running to the town and setting it ablaze so that those responsible would know what it was like to watch everything you knew go up in flames. Lizzy put her head in her hands, tears welling in her eyes.

"They told us… they told us they had helped the survivors, that they had done their best to save as many people as they could and put out the fire! I can't believe that they would do that!" She gasped. Her fingernails began to dig into her skin as she trembled with shock and fury.

"Hey," Ace shrugged, "It's what we get for being poor." His voice was so sharp and venomous that Lizzy flinched at the words, even though his hatred wasn't directed at her, but at the rich bastards who had killed so many that night. Lizzy's eyes suddenly went wide and her face went pale, she turned to stare at Ace with horror on her face.

"He said… 'Sabo was burning'... is that how-" A single look from Ace cut her off. His face was filled with such hatred and anger that he was nearly unrecognizable, his eyes were so cold it nearly stopped her heart. She had never seen this side of him, and it frightened her. Ace looked away, realizing that he had scared her and was now feeling guilty but his rage still consumed him.

"No!" He spat, unable to keep the raw emotion from corrupting his voice. He folded his arms protectively around his little brother, holding him to his chest and tightly squeezing him, trembling with rage.

"Sabo was murdered!" His entire body was so tense that if Luffy hadn't been made of rubber he might have snapped him in half. As it was the boy didn't even stir.

"By whom!?" Lizzy gasped, unable to keep herself from asking.

"The damn celestial dragons! That's who!" Ace spat the name 'celestial dragon' as though it were poison on his tongue.

"You mean, he was the kid on the fishing boat! The one they shot down!?" Lizzy hissed barely able to breathe, she had been there that day with her family, she had had no idea that the kid was Ace's brother. Ace just nodded, and his shoulders shook slightly as though he was trying not to cry in frustration. There was a long silence as Ace fought to contain the silent fury that burned within him, a coil of hatred just as intense as he had felt for the whole world before he had met his brother. After all these years, there was still a part of him that desired to kill and hate and destroy. It was a fury he had thought he had left behind, but it seems that the past is much harder to kill and part of it still screamed inside of him, demanding justice, no more than that. He wanted vengeance, the desire to watch those he hated burn to the ground still seethed within him with such unbridled ferocity that it scared him. He was scaring Lizzy as well, he could tell. The aura of absolute hatred emanated from him into the room and filled it with a tense stillness that left her speechless.

Just then Luffy mumbled in his sleep and a distressed expression crossed his face as though instinctively he knew something was bothering Ace. Ace felt his anger dissipating as he looked at the small boy he was nearly crushing in his arms. He hadn't realized that he was still so raw inside that the mere thought of what happened would lead him to such savage thoughts and emotions. If he wasn't careful, he knew he would end up getting his brother killed, like the bear back when they were kids and even back in the alley way when he had accidentally hurt Luffy by letting his anger take control of him. He had to let it go, or one day he would regret it, and he had sworn he would never let himself live to regret anything ever again. He took several deep breaths and forced his tense muscles to relax.

"I'm sorry," he muttered, both to his brother and to Lizzy who seemed quite anxious herself. She had never seen this side of him, and he hoped that his anger hadn't scared her away from him altogether. He closed his eyes feeling shame wash over him for behaving like a child again and letting his anger get the better of him. Suddenly he felt cool hand gently place itself against his back and he turned to see Lizzy staring at him with concerned but gentle eyes.

"No, I'm sorry for prying… I had no idea…" she said softly but Ace shook his head.

"I just get so angry sometimes, it's not your fault," Lizzy smiled sadly and kissed him gently, showing him that she had forgiven him for frightening her.

"You have good reason to be angry," she offered but Ace didn't say anything, he just closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall of the fort. He felt her sidle up next to him and brush away a few angry tears he hadn't even noticed he had shed from his cheeks. She then kissed him on the cheek and rested her head against his shoulder. Everything was quiet after that, she didn't bother to try and reassure him any further, but allowed her presence to offer her support of him and soon he felt his breathing sync up with both hers and Luffy's. He hadn't even realized how tired his rage had made him, and he slowly felt himself drifting into unconsciousness.

So that was a lot to unpack in a single chapter. I think its fair to assume that all the things they saw and experienced as kids stuck with them into adulthood. Although they don't like to dwell on their pasts, I feel like the effects these events had on their personality are pretty clear in the story. Honestly the first time I ever really noticed that there might be something more complex to Luffy's backstory was back in the Alabasta arc, back in the scene where Luffy is explaining to Vivi that war is inevitable and that they have to go take on Crocodile. She asks him what is so wrong about trying to prevent any one from dying in the upcoming battle and Luffy just very firmly and somewhat coldly says "People die". The way the scene was framed and how Luffy was written up to that point it honestly shocked me, it seemed to imply that he knew death all too well, had experienced something like this before and that he understood the nature of their world. The nature of the world that we as viewers hadn't even seen yet. Needless to say, its one of my favorite moments in the series for its subtlety, and its one of the moments that really got me thinking about Luffy as a character.

Anyways, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed!