Hybrid: Hey guys, sorry I forgot the Omake last chapter! Ehehe... I'll put in this one!
Gaara: Hello
Hybrid: Oh hey, Gaara! What brings you here?
Gaara: I just wanted to thank you for not making me seem like a complete sociopathic, murderous, criminally insane nut case.
Hybrid: eh, don't worry about it *flaps hand nonchalantly* You were always my favorite Naruto character period, so I felt you deserved some kindness! Plus, it was a result of the changes from Canon. Also, I'll be taking the poll down after I post this chapter! I know it's a bit early, but another shall take it's place, and this time everyone gets TWO votes! But trust me, this one I can almost guarantee will have A LOT more votes. *Eyebrows and hair curl like the cartoon grinch while I give an absolutely evil smile*
Chapter 19: Graduation Exam! Team Seven or Team Twelve?!
"Good luck today, I hope you all pass," Iruka said as he began passing out the written exam for the Konoha graduation test. At the front, Mizuki was sitting idly, picking at his fingernail, plotting for the night.
I can guarantee the Demon doesn't pass. It's a fucking idiot. So, when it fails, I'll give it the 'Make-up Exam' and kill it in the woods.
Naruto, meanwhile, was keeping an attentive eye on the teal-haired Chuunin.
He's plotting something.
Well no shit.
A tail of Chakra says he'll try to get me to steal something important.
Kit, do you really think I'm stupid enough to take that bet?
It was worth a shot. The conversation between the two most powerful beings in the building, possibly the village, happened while Naruto's body went on auto-pilot and filled in the answers without thinking.
Twenty minutes later, everyone had turned in their tests, and Iruka began grading them while Mizuki took the class out for the weapons and Taijutsu portion.
"You have to either last three minutes, or land three solid blows to pass in Taijutsu, and I'm your opponent" Mizuki explained, then began calling students randomly.
"Uchiha Sasuke," the fangirls still present in the class began swooning and cheering as Sasuke stepped up onto the Taijutsu mat. He slid into the Uchiha main family stance- the Sharinken. The Copy Fist was similar to the standard Uchiha Interceptor Fist, except it also utilised the Sharingan to instantly copy and use a few moves from the foe's Taijutsu, so it combined counter-strikes and evasion with whatever his foe was fighting with. Too bad the Sharingan hadn't yet awakened.
In a sudden blur of impressive speed, for a Genin hopeful, he shot forward and threw three consecutive punches in rapid succession. The first smacked dead-center of Mizuki's chest, accidentally hitting his Solar Plexus. Mizuki fell over as his lungs stopped working, trying to heave in air. Sasuke blinked in confusion as Hinata and Naruto ran up to check on him. Hinata hit some Tenketsu around his lungs, and Naruto buried his fist into Mizuki's Solar Plexus on purpose, giving his Diaphragm a jolt to begin working again.
With a gasp, the Chuunin Academy assistant gulped massive amounts of air and stayed where he was for a few moments.
Not the best solution to that problem, Kit. You could have killed him.
Eh, I didn't have time for the gentle solution.
On the subject of time and solutions... I've been poking around in your DNA again.Naruto growled to himself.
Last time you did that, I was blind for a week, and my hair turned pink. PINK!
I fixed it! Anyway, this time I was only looking! But I found something very interesting.
What is it? Came the resigned response.
You have three potential Kekkei Genkai.
…... come again?
You. Have. Three. Bloodline. Limits. At this point, Naruto did a good impression of a fish on a fire, namely staring blankly at nothing with his mouth and eyes wide open.
You're shitting me.
Nope. The catch is that I can only unlock two. The third will be forever blocked. First is actually directly from Kushina. Her Adamantine Sealing Chains. I loathe them, but they are useful; they are resistant to three Chakra natures, they can form blades, barriers, seals, and many other things. They also can't be burned by the Ameterasu flames of the Mangekyo Sharingan. Plus, the shape manipulation can be so helpful in... other settings. The Kyuubi here gave a lecherous cackle while Naruto almost face-faulted.
At the Konoha Hot Springs
Jiraiya had he sudden urge to cackle lecherously, and it had nothing to do with the women he was peeping on. He felt like he should run to the Academy immediately and shake his godson vigorously, shouting something along the lines of 'DO IT! DO IT NOW! TAKE THE FUCKING DEAL!'
Back at the Academy
Stupid ero-fox... Naruto muttered mentally.
"Uzumaki Naruto." Naruto looked up to see Mizuki looking at him with doubtful eyes.
When the blonde got up onto the Taijutsu mat on a raised dais, he took the Uzumaki Taijutsu stance; the Uzuken.
In stark contrast to the Hiken, a round-robin taijutsu taught to Konoha Academy students until they found a more appropriate style, the Uzuken was a semi-advanced style that was taught back when Uzushiogakure still existed in their Academy, and focused on quick strikes and total evasion.
"We didn't teach you that stance."
"You never said I had to use the Hiken. Plus, Sasuke used the Sharinken, and Hinata used the Jyuuken, so deduct points from me, you gotta do it to them too." Several shouts of outrage came from most of the class' female populace.
"I was merely making an observation. I was just wondering where you learned it," Mizuki replied calmly. Naruto smirked playfully.
"I'd tell you, but where would the fun in that be?" Naruto lashed out with a quick series of jabs, which Mizuki blocked, before retaliating with several kicks and punches of his own. The two exchanged blows and banter, Mizuki actually finding that he enjoyed the blonde's wit, and enjoyed sparring with him.
"Should you be fighting so soon? You almost died," Naruto said conversationally after landing his second blow in the match, a sweep kick to Mizuki's shin.
The blue-haired Chuunin shrugged. "I'll live. I ever tell you about the time I was considered legally dead for seven minutes?"
"No lasting brain damage?"
"Never said that. I lost several IQ points, and my short-term memory sometimes gets wonky." just as the timer was about to ring, Naruto ducked under Mizuki's snap-kick and, with a roar, planted both his fists into the man's midsection, bending over at the waist sideways, and launched Mizuki out of the ring, off the dais, and onto the ground. He rolled for a few feet, then flattened out with a wheeze.
The class turned at Iruka's laughing fit from the scene. Once he calmed down and everyone walked over to the Weapons Range, Iruka began to explain the passing grade for thrown weapons.
"You need at least five out of ten successful hits and a minimum two bulls-eyes, or fatal hits, with both shuriken and kunai. Senbon are optional, but extra credit. We'll be going alphabetically. Aburame Shino..."
Anyway, what was the second one?
Kami, I thought you'd never get to get back to this discussion! Anyway, the second one is, surprisingly, the Shikotsumyaku.
… Come again?
You said that earlier. But yes, you could have the Dead Bone Pulse. The applications are limitless, Kit. You can make swords, axes, bows, kunai, senbon, whips, the list goes on! All from your bones themselves!
Doesn't the Shikotsumyaku come with some form of debilitating death sentence though?
Funny story, actually. Of the hundred or so Kaguya I've witnessed that have unlocked this Kekkei Genkai, no two have died of the same disease. But you won't be affected anyway! Naruto frowned in confusion.
Your Uzumaki healing factor, combined with the one I give you, and your weird natural immunity to disease (seriously I'm thinking you're the culmination of like twenty different fucking clans, Kit) cancels out any chance of you dying from that curse.
So, basically, I could be the ultimate assassin or front-line fighter?
Exactly.
"Naruto, you're up," Iruka called, snapping Naruto out of his inner dialogue. He stepped up absently and grabbed the ten kunai presented to him. Then he whispered to Iruka.
"How many did Sasuke get?"
"Shuriken, eight bulls-eyes, Kunai, ten, and he tried senbon but only managed four successful hits." the blond dynamo cast an amused glance at his Uchiha friend, who immediately curled up under a nearby tree, thunderclouds and gloom hanging over him.
"I wanted to see if I could do it..."
"HURRY UP BAKA! STOP MAKING FUN OF SASUKE-KUN WHEN YOU CAN'T DO NEARLY AS GOOD AS HE CAN! Right sasuke-kun?" the whole class had to sweat drop at how the girl went from screaming elephant to sickly sweet in a flat millisecond. Then Iruka, Sasuke, Shikamaru, Kiba, and Choji had to hold back their laughter at Sakura's assumption that Naruto was actually worse than anyone in the class. The blonde looked at the pink-haired girl a moment, before grinning.
"Hey, Iruka-sensei. Can I get someone to stand in front of the target dummy? I like a challenge." Iruka gulped quietly.
"If... if anyone is willing to volunteer..."
"What do you say, Sakura? Since I'm so bad, I'll miss you by a mile, right? You'll be totally safe." Now, Naruto's friends saw the brilliance in his plan. Sakura paled immensely, before casting a look at Sasuke, who looked back at her with an emotionless gaze. She seemed to steel her resolve and strode to the center of the range, halfway between Naruto and the dummy, and stood there with her arms crossed, glowering at the blonde, who was grinning maniacally.
"Little further back." Sakura took five steps backwards. "Perfect!" then he chucked the first two Kunai simutaneously, both zipping past Sakura's neck, clipping a few strands of her hair, and embedded themselves into the neck of the dummy, right where both directions of the Jugular Vein would be on a person. He picked up four this time and slung one from his right hand, then spun and slung the other three from his left in a over-the-shoulder hurl.
Three swishes later, and Saukra was totally untouched, but the kunai had lodged themselves into spots on each limb that could be considered fatal, just from how quickly the blood would spill from the wound. Naruto smirked as he felt, rather than saw, the class' jaws hit the dirt, and Sakura began to realize her mistake. She turned paler than before.
Naruto grabbed the last four kunai and threw the first two, then chucked the next two after them, causing them to clash in midair, right next to Sakura, and redirect themselves into the dummy behind her in four separate places; the middle of the forehead area, over the heart, in the groin, and where the left lung would be. Iruka made a mark on his clipboard with a grin, then handed Naruto the shuriken.
All ten metal stars flew from calloused hands simultaneously, literally curving in mid-air around the terrified girl and burying themselves deeply into the dummy, right next to every kunai.
"Oi, sensei, pass me the senbon." Iruka, never having seen the Jinchuuriki's skill with the acupuncture needles, handed them over with trepidation. Naruto threw them in a continuous stream, one right after the other, and they grazed Sakura's skin ever so lightly to bury themselves into nerve center spots on the dummy. Sakura turned around to look at the senbon.
"You didn't make a single fatal hit with the needles Naruto-baka!"
"Actually," Iruka had to hide his Cheshire grin. "He did something harder by far. He hit where the needles would shut down the nerves and make it so his opponent would be unable to move, allowing for disposal at Naruto's pleasure. Congratulations, Naruto, you pass weapons."
"Eh, it's not like this crap actually affects my standing anyway." just as he said that, a Jounin shunshin'ed onto the field, grinning at Naruto and smoking a cigarette. The whole class recognized him.
"Naruto, you forgot your Tanto at home," he said, holding out said short blade. Naruto grumbled under his breath.
"Tou-chan, I bought Katanas yesterday remember? I was planning on strapping them on for when I get my headband. They work better anyway." Asuma looked thoughtful for a moment, then snubbed his cancer stick and tossed the short blade to the blonde anyway.
"Never hurts to have backup." then he left the same way he appeared. Naruto sighed and slung the Tanto over his shoulder, angling it so the handle stuck out over his left shoulder. He ignored the odd looks from everyone in the class, sans Sasuke. He turned on his heel, and walked calmly inside, the class following slowly.
When everyone else got into the room, they found him strapping two separate katanas to his belt, and a second Tanto to angle over his right shoulder.
"Where's those come from?" asked one of the civilian born girls, Ami. AKA the biggest bitch in the class.
"I've had them under my desk all day, waiting for this point. Tou-chan just forced me to use the Tanto as well." everyone took a look at Naruto's new look. A few almost crapped themselves.
Instead of his usual shorts and hoodie, he now wore civilian pants, which were considered impractical for Shinobi because they were so loose, which were a faded blue, with a few tears and holes. Heavy black shinobi boots encased his feet. His belt, which now held a katana on either side, was solid grey and had the Uzumaki spiral for a buckle. And finally, he wore a dark orange sleeveless hoodie that was zipped half-way up, revealing a black t-shirt underneath, and the sleeves of said shirt ran down to mid-bicep. Combined with the two Tanto poking over his shoulders, and his unruly blonde hair poking out everywhere while the hood was down, and the new Naruto cut an imposing figure. (A/N: if someone could draw this for me so I can use it as the cover art for this story, that's be awesome.)
"What say we jump right into the Ninjutsu portion? I don't like waiting." no-one said anything as Iruka began calling students to do the three academy basics, and up to two extra credit jutsu. Finally, Naruto was called.
"Sensei, Jiji told me the Bunshin doesn't actually have to be the basic illusionary one. I literally can't do it anyway. So... Kage Bunshin No Jutsu!" with that, three solid copies of the blonde appeared, all leaning on a separate friend. Shikamaru grumbled, Choji laughed, and Kiba gaped.
"Very good! Now, Kawarimi." Naruto, with no hand signs, was suddenly replaced by Sakura, who had taken his spot right next to Sasuke. The blonde had his feet kicked up on the desk with his hands behind his head, grinning, while Sakura, who was not used to sudden substitution and had a moment ago been sitting, fell onto her ass. She growled and glared daggers at the whiskered teen, who ignored her.
"Dare I ask... Henge?" Naruto's grin widened and in a small poof of smoke, he was replaced by another Sakura, who turned to Sasuke with puppy eyes, much to the Uchiha's horror.
"Sasuke-kun, please don't ignore me! We've got to fall in live and remake the Uchiha!" Naruto said in perfect imitation of the pink-haired girl, before dropping the disguise and laughing heartily.
"Don't... ever do that again," Sasuke shivered. (A/N: Seriously though, I'm not bashing her, Naruto is just having fun at her expense) Sakura glared more, but said nothing.
"I think I pass!" Iruka tossed him a Hiate-ate, which he tied around his neck just like Hinata.
"Now, Hokage-sama was fairly sure of who would pass, so he made up the team lists early. I'll read them off now, and you'll meet your Sensei's in about an hour." it wasn't even one in the afternoon yet. Naruto zoned out teams one through five.
"Team Six, is Sekazu Ami, Taru Hayate, and Hebi Sai." (I couldn't think of non-stupid sounding names, sue me) "You're sensei will be Gekko Hayate." Hayate perked up that he shared a name with their Sensei, but Ami groaned in obvious disappontment.
"Why couldn't Jozun-Oji be our Sensei?! He has to teach me about the Limit Break!"
Ami always was a temperamental and demanding bitch, wasn't she?
Yes, she was and is. I'm surprised you haven't killed her yet.
Eh, I hold enough respect for Jozun to put up with his cousin.The most level headed member of team six piped up; Hebi Sai. He was almost an exact replica of Orochimaru, the only differences being that his hair was chocolaty brown instead of black, and he had no purple markings around his eyes.
"Isn't he your clan head? I seriously doubt he has time to be a Jounin-sensei." Oh sweet, beautiful irony, you are one cold bitch.
"Team Seven," continued Iruka. "Will be Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura," a triumphant cry and a loud groan followed by a loud thump as Sasuke slammed his face into the desk followed this reading. "And Uzumaki-Sarutobi Naruto." the exact same reaction followed, except this time it was Sasuke crying in triumph, and Sakura groaning. "Your Sensei will be Hatake Kakashi." Now, both males groaned quite loudly and introduced their faces to their shared desk violently.
"Team Eight will be Aburame Shino, Hyuuga Hinata, and Inuzuka Kiba. Your sensei will be Yuuhi Kurenai." the three members of team Eight were already sitting close together, and they smiled at each other a bit.
"Team Ten is Akimichi Choji, Yamanaka Ino,"
"And me, I'm guessing. How troublesome." Iruka scowled at the lazy Nara for a moment while most of the class snickered.
"Under Sarutobi Asuma." Naruto's eye twitched mechanically.
"Hey Hebi, what was that about a Clan Head not having time to be a Jounin Sensei?" he got no response.
"Sensei, what about Team Nine?" asked Ino out of curiousity.
"Oh, Team Nine is still in rotation from last year," Iruka said with a smile. "As is Team Eleven. However, Team Twelve..." Iruka drifted off as he frowned in confusion at the paper in front of him.
"Sensei?" Sakura said cautiously.
"Ummm... Team Twelve will be Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura, and Uzumaki Naruto under Sekazu Jozun..." three different reactions ensued. Most of the class felt their jaws drop, but Sasuke and Naruto were the most affected, both simultaneously grabbing their heads in confusion. The third reaction came from both Sakura and Ami at once.
"WHAT?!" they screeched in perfect synch.
"How can we have two sensei's?!"
"WHY THE HELL DO THEY GET JOZUN-OJI AS A SENSEI?!"
Kit, is now a bad time to tell you the third Kekkei Genkai? Kurama asked, mirth evident in his voice.
Yes.
Too bad. I'm going to tell you now.
No, you aren't.
It's the Rinnegan.
Omake- The Uchiha Bet
Sasuke and Itachi were sitting on top of the Yondaime Hokage's head on the Hokage Monument, waiting for Naruto so they could do something together.
"This is boring... Ne, wanna make a bet?" Sasuke suddenly asked. Itachi cracked one eye at his little brother. He'd been meditating.
"What sort of bet?"
"A bet on the excuse Naruto gives us."
"What is the prize?"
"Loser has to pay for Naruto's next three Ramen trips." Itachi thought for a moment, before grinning and nodding. "I'm gonna say... he says he was playing with Konohamaru."
"I'll say he was bugging Hokage-sama or Asuma-Oji for advice on something. But what if neither of us is correct?"
"Whoever is closer wins." just then, Naruto appeared with a sheepish grin, rubbing the back of his head.
"Sorry, guys, I had to track down Kona and his friends after their play-date and return them home." Sasuke began cackling.
"Well, shit."