Disclaimer: I own nothing that has to do with Uncharted or Gravity Falls.
Chapter 3: A Surprising Find
(Dipper and Stan move further up the cliff and stop where there's the top of a waterfall. Resting right in the water on the edge of the top is an old World War II German submarine. They are amazed.)
Dipper: Whoa.
Stan: I'll be damned.
Dipper: Must've come up the river during flood season and gotten stuck. Let's check it out, huh?
Stan: (suspicious) Nah... Wait, wait, wait. Something about this feels kinda hinky.
Dipper: (raises his eyebrow) "Hinky"? You act like you've never seen a German U-boat in the middle of the jungle before.
Stan: No, I'm being serious, Dipper.
Dipper: (laughs) Alright, tell you what... Why don't you stay here. I'll check it out myself. And I'll call you if I run into any Nazis.
Stan: Yeah, you do that.
(Dipper starts to head towards the sub but stops. He takes out Drake's diary and hands it to Stan.)
Dipper: Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait... Hold onto this for me, will ya?
(Stan takes the diary and Dipper goes to the water's edge.)
Dipper: Okay... Looks like I'm gonna have to do this the hard way.
(He jumps in the water and swims past the sub. He climbs out on a river bank and sees a way up the cliffs overlooking the sub. Stan watches him from afar.)
Stan (through the radio) Looks like you're gonna have to monkey across those cliffs to get into the U-boat.
(Dipper climbs up a cliff and swings on a vine to get the other side.)
Stan (through the radio) Hey, watch yourself up there. It's a long way down.
(Dipper then climbs down the cliffs and drops down on the back of the sub. He walks on the sub's roof and reaches the hatch. He sees Stan on the shore.)
Stan: (calling out) Dipper! when was your last tetanus shot?!
Dipper: (calling back) Oh, that's funny!
(Dipper enters the submarine and looks around at the big mess inside.)
Dipper: All right, I'm in.
Stan: Whaddaya see?
Dipper: Something nasty happened to these guys. There's blood everywhere... and soup.
Stan: (confused) What?
(Dipper walks down the hallway in the sub and finds another hatch door. He opens it and goes through into another room. He crosses the room to another doorway. In the doorway is the rotting corpse of a German officer.)
Dipper: Eugh...
(Dipper pulls the body away from the door As he does, something falls out of its pocket He picks it up and sees it's an old Spanish gold coin.)
Dipper: (intrigued) Huh. Now where did you get this, my decomposing friend?
(Dipper goes through the doorway and radios Stan.)
Dipper: I think the trail just got warm again.
Stan: (throughthe radio) How so?
Dipper: Well, I just found a body with a coin of Spanish gold, only it was stamped with a mint mark I've never seen before.
Stan: (through the radio) Really?
Dipper: Looks like our German friends had a little secret.
(Dipper keeps going through the sub and finds a ladder. He climbs it and gets to the upper level of the sub. He enters a room with sunlight coming in. On the Wall was a large map of the world with sections divided by letter and number codes. There was also a table with a curtain in front of it. Dipper pulled back the curtain and found the body of German captain that had looked like it'd seen better days. He calls Stan again.)
Dipper: I'm in the Captain's quarters and get this: He's still here.
Stan: (through the radio) What's that supposed to mean?
Dipper: Ah, looks like he was killed, ripped to shreds actually. Sheesh, what a way to go.
Stan: (through the radio) Sounds terrible, check his wallet.
Dipper: (smirks) You're all heart, Stan.
(He sees something in the captain's hand. He takes it out and find it to be a small, old map of an island that looked like a Spanish colony. It also looked like it was torn out of something.)
Dipper: No way...
(He finds a larger, much newer map of same island on the table. It has a code on it: UK2642.)
Dipper: You've got to be kidding...
Stan: (through the radio) Find anything, kid?
(Dipper looks at the world map on the wall and examines the coordinates.)
Dipper: U-K... U-K... UK2642... (finds the location) Gotcha!
Stan: (through the radio) Dipper, you hear me?
Dipper: (excited) Stan, you're not gonna believe this.
Stan: (through the radio) Try me.
Dipper: I think I found our missing page.
Stan: (through the radio) You're kidding…
Dipper: It looks like Drake and our German pals were after the same treasure, and I've got the map that's gonna lead us right to it.
Stan: (through the radio) Kid, you better be right. This better not be another wild-goose chase. We've got to get something out of this trip or - (cuts off)
Dipper: Or what? Stan… you there? Stanley?
(Dipper gets concerned and leaves the room. He heads back down to the lower level and finds a way out in the front of the sub. He swings the hatch door open into the next room and accidentally hits a torpedo stored in there. It rolls on the floor and its propeller starts up.)
Dipper: (panics) Oh, no, don't… That's probably bad.
(He runs for the open hatch on the other side of the room and gets out of the sub. He swims to shore and climbs out. Only to be met with two menacing looking men One has a mustache, dark hair and is bald on the sides. The other looks slightly younger and has short brown hair that sticks up in the front. Behind them is Stan with his hands up. Several mercenaries with assault rifles roam the area.)
Powers: (to Dipper) Hello.
(Dipper climbs out with a serious face. Trigger confiscates his gun.)
Dipper: (sarcastically) Friends of yours, Stan?
Powers: I'm Agent Powers. This is Agent Trigger.
Dipper: Yeah, I know who you assholes are.
Powers: (chuckles) Manners, young man. This is just business.
Trigger: (shoves Dipper) Get over there.
Dipper: Easy!
Trigger: (points his rifle at him) Put your hands up.
Dipper: (raises his hands, impatiently) Alright, they're up. Now what's this all about?
Powers: (to Dipper) See, your friend owes us money, Mr. Drake. A lot of money. So when he told me that you two were going here because you were onto something big, "the find of a lifetime," he said. Well, I was so intrigued that we just had to come here and see for ourselves.
(Dipper looks at Stan with an disappointed look. Stan only shrugs.)
Powers: (to Stan, disappointed) But he's made grand promises before. Haven't you, Stanley? And here we are again, another fool's errand.
Dipper: Sheesh, does he always go on like this?
(Trigger hits Dipper from behind.)
Dipper: Hey!
Powers: Take it easy, Trigger. (to Dipper and Stan) So, I'm afraid the time is up. Unless of course you found something in there, Mr. Drake (points to the sub) that might compensate for all this unpleasantness?
Stan: He's screwing with you, Dipper. They heard everything. Just give 'em the map.
(Dipper sighs and takes the large map out but keeps the small map hidden. He knew the torpedo he turned on would go off at any moment and the ensuing explosion would make the distraction they'll use to escape. He gives the map to Trigger who shows it to Powers.)
Trigger: What does a Kriegsmarine map have to do with El Dorado?
Stan: What, you think this is a coincidence? The Germans were after the same treasure. That map has something to do with it. So, we square?
Powers: (smiles) For now. But just in case you need a reminder… (takes out a pistol and points it at Dipper.)
Stan: Hey, come on, leave him out of it.
Dipper: (nervously) Yeah, don't you guys usually just cut off a finger or something?
Powers: That's far too vulgar. No, I think this will hurt him a bit more.
Stan: (walks over to Dipper) Now whoa, whoa, whoa - C'mon, Powers, he's got nothing to do with -
(Powers shoots Stan in the chest. He falls clutches it and falls to the ground.)
Dipper: (shocked) Stan! (moves towards Powers, angry) You son-of-a-bitch…
(The U-boat explodes suddenly explodes. The agents and their henchmen are caught off guard and some of their men who had climbed on the sub were killed. Dipper takes his chance and makes a run for it right after catching a glimpse of Stan on the ground.)
Powers: (sees Dipper escaping) Stop him!
(Dipper runs down the cliffs and back through the narrow pathway he came from. He re-enters the opening with the stone structures at the back of the temple. He looks back to see if he was followed when he's suddenly pulled behind one of the structures. He panics for a second until he sees it's Pacifica.)
Pacifica: Whoa there, cowboy!
Dipper: Oh...
(Pacifica punches him in the face.)
Dipper: Ow!
Pacifica: (upset) That's for leaving me at the dock.
Dipper: What the hell are you doing here?
Pacifica: Listen, I'm a good enough reporter to follow a couple of no-luck tomb robbers -
Dipper: Shhh!
(Dipper shields her against the wall as mercenaries run by. Pacifica gasps and blushes a little.)
Mercenary #1: He went this way!
Mercenary #2: I'll radio ahead!
Dipper: (letting her go) Well, you're down to one tomb robber now. Stan's been shot.
Pacifica: (alarmed) What?
Dipper: Yeah, and we're next if we don't get out of here.
Pacifica: Oh, God... I'm sorry.
Dipper: Please tell me you have a gun.
Pacifica: Of course. (hands him a spare pistol.)
Dipper: Oh, thanks. All right, c'mon.
(They quietly head towards the big hole in the temple wall. Some mercenaries appear and shoot at them. They shoot back and put them down.)
Pacifica: You always seem to be getting shot at.
Dipper: They're shooting at you, too, you know!
(They enter the temple and make their way through. They cross the room where the El Dorado statue was and over the gap of fallen pillars.)
Dipper: Stay close.
(As they run through the temple, they encounter more mercenaries and fight their way through them. They get to the room with the well in the floor.)
Pacifica: (amazed) What the hell is this place, anyway?
Dipper: Long story. Tell you later.
(They get further ahead and shoot down some more mercenaries.)
Pacifica: (smirks) Never a dull moment, huh?
Dipper: Just keep your head down. These guys aren't messin' around.
(They soon reach the entrance to the temple.)
Dipper: C'mon. Stay with me.
(They head up the stairs and out of the temple. They take out two more mercenaries patrolling the area and go past the stone structures.)
Pacifica: Over here, I think. Yeah, this way!
(Dipper and Pacifica go through a narrow path and approach a jeep that Pacifica drive there in behind some trees.)
Pacifica: You always been this popular?
Dipper: (smugly) Well, I do seem to attract the scum of the earth. Ah, no offense.
Pacifica: (smiles) None taken.
(The two get in the jeep.)
Dipper: Do you have a good memory?
Pacifica: Yeah, why?
Dipper: UK2642... you got that?
Pacifica: Yeah, what is it?
Dipper: (starts up the jeep) It's Kriegsmarine coordinates. I think I know where the Spanish took El Dorado.
Pacifica: (intrigued) El Dorado?
Dipper: (starts driving away) Yeah, that's what Francis Drake was looking for. Stan convinced me to cut you loose 'cause he was afraid you'd inadvertently give it away to bad guys around the world. However, he kind of told a bunch of bad guys exactly where we were going on a treasure hunt himself. So, I guess I got nothing to lose if I let you in on this.
Pacifica: (flattered) Well, thank you. You really know where El Dorado is?
Dipper: Sure do. Problem is, so do the bastards who shot Stan. If the Spanish found the treasure, they moved it to that island. (shows Pacifica the map) Drake followed 'em.
Pacifica: (excited) Well, what are you waiting for!? I'll get the story, and you get... whatever it is you're after.
Dipper: (serious) Hey, this isn't going to be a vacation, you know.
Pacifica: (rolls eyes) I can take care of myself. Besides, you owe me one.
Dipper: (smiles) I suppose I do.