Chapter 12

"Good morning."

Sylvie looked up to see Chilli smiling back at her. She remembered falling asleep with Gabby but didn't even process when Chilli came into the room. Brett glanced at the clock, noting that it was only quarter to six in the morning. She groaned which made Chilli smirk, nudging her gently. "You snore, you know?"

"No worse than Stella." Sylvie smirked back, slowly sitting up. "How come you got stuck with babysitting duty?"

Chilli forced a small smile although it was more of a pity smile. "Shay. Tequila. Enough said."

Sylvie frowned so Chilli continued. "Don't worry. I wasn't drinking, Erin only had one, you drank a couple before Kidd stopped you, but the others went through a few bottles so you're stuck with Lindsay and I this morning."

In all honesty, Erin had been up all night. Her police instincts kicked in and she guarded both the front and the back doors all night, checking on Sylvie every half an hour.

Sylvie groaned in pain as she started to get up even with the assistance of Chilli. Once again, she refused pain medication but did allow Chilli to help her out to the living room where Erin was on the sofa watching early morning news. She turned around when she heard them, amused, firstly out of protection but then out of comfort.

"How're you feeling, lady?"

Chilli helped Sylvie sit down on the sofa between the two of them, mostly focusing her attention on the television to avoid the attention being on her. "I'm fine."

"Sure you are." Erin gently patted Brett's leg, forcing a small smile. She wasn't going to push- that was up to Dawson and Kidd.

"You hungry? You want some breakfast?" Chilli asked, concerned at the fact that her partner hadn't eaten in at least a couple of days.

Sylvie just shook her head and tried to concentrate on the TV. After a half an hour of sitting in silence, Erin and Chilli exchanged glances before Chilli nodded. They both knew that it would be hours before the others got up considering how much they had to drink the night before and Lindsay had spoken with Olivia Benson who said that both she and Amanda Rollins would be there around noon.

"Sylvie, I made a call last night." Erin started. "To Olivia Benson of Manhattan SVU." Sylvie looked uncomfortable and began to protest but Erin placed a comforting hand on her arm. "She's a friend and after Nadia… I speak to her at least once a week. She's a great sounding board and she and one of her detectives, Amanda Rollins, are going to come out here later today. Now you don't have to talk to them but they are great at their jobs and even better at comforting people."

"Gabby and Stella?" Sylvie whispered after a few moments.

Erin forced a smile and Chilli squeezed her hand. "They're here."

Erin and Chilli exchanged another glance as Sylvie went back to "watching" TV. Shay had passed out first followed closely by Gabby and then Stella. Both knew that they wouldn't be awake before Benson and Rollins got there. Luckily, Erin had talked to Voight whom immediately booked the cabin next door for Olivia and Amanda.

They spent the next couple of hours watching TV together but it was slightly scary when Sylvie picked to watch "The Virgin Suicides".

The knock at the door subconsciously made Sylvie jump and Erin reach for her gun. Chilli checked before unlocking the door and letting Olivia and Amanda inside. After that and knowing that Brett was safe, she disappeared to try wake up the others knowing that Sylvie would need them there.

With no success, Erin stepped forward and hugged Olivia before hugging Amanda. A subtle and silent exchange was made between Lindsay and Benson regarding Nadia but both knew that it wasn't appropriate at that time.

Lindsay lead Benson and Rollins over to Brett and Chilli, making sure that the blonde was comfortable enough before introducing them. "Hey, Brett. These are Liv and Amanda, the ones I was telling you about."

She noticed Sylvie flinch and shift closer to Chilli so Erin took a seat beside her, smiling reassuringly. "You don't have to talk to them." She whispered. "But they're here if you want to, okay?"

Sylvie met Erin's eyes and she nodded, gripping Chilli's hand like a lifeline as she carefully stood up. She was still Sylvie Brett after all and was raised to use her manners. She tentatively shook Olivia's hand first followed by Amanda's, never letting go of Chilli's hand. "Hi, I'm Sylvie. Sylvie Brett."

Both Olivia and Amanda smiled at her. "Hey, Sylvie. I'm Olivia, this is Amanda. It's nice to meet you."

Sylvie forced a smile then turned to face Erin. "Gabby? Stella?"

Erin tentatively put a hand on Brett's shoulder, forcing a smile. "They're still sleeping."

Chilli noticed Sylvie's discomfort so lead her over to the sofa. The others followed, Rollins noticing what they were watching.

"'The Virgin Suicides', huh?" She took the spot next to Olivia whom was next to Erin. Sylvie was as close to Chilli as she could get. "Jeffrey Eugenides, right?"

Amanda smiled pitifully over at Sylvie whom met her gaze before continuing. "I used to love that book. The movie too."

"What changed?"

Everyone but Rollins were surprised to hear the blonde speak up. "A lot. I went through a lot back in Atlanta and then I joined SVU… I met Liv and had Jesse and everything changed. I didn't feel alone anymore. I have a family."

"Jesse?"

Amanda smiled, taking out her phone and showing it to Sylvie. "My daughter." She nodded towards Olivia. "Liv has a little boy. Noah."

Olivia took Amanda's lead and showed Sylvie a photo of Noah. The blonde smiled, sincerely this time. "They're beautiful."

They sat in silence for a few moments before Sylvie spoke up again. "I love kids… They're innocent."

"Yes, they are." Olivia nodded to Erin, silently instructing her to wake up at least one of the others, knowing that Sylvie was on the verge of a panic attack.

Erin slipped out of the room but returned moments later with all three. Stella checked on Sylvie first but Shay was stuck trying to hold Gabby back.

"What is this?" On that question, Olivia and Amanda lead Sylvie into another room.

"I told you that I would talk to Benson. She and Amanda arrived around midday. You were all asleep and we didn't want to wake you."

"What about Brett?!"

Erin and Chilli exchanged glances as did Shay and Stella. "What about her? She's fine."

"Oh, yeah?" Gabby stood up to face Erin directly. "And I used to tell everyone that I was "fine". There's a huge difference between fine and okay!"

"Are you mad that I called her?" Gabby started to move towards Lindsay but Shay held her back.

"No!" Gabby yelled at everyone besides Stella and Shay. "I'm mad at you for starting without me! Without us. Stella and I… We need to be there. Brett needs us."

"Sweetie…" Shay started but Gabby put up her hands making them all stop.

"Don't. Just stop."

With that, Gabby left the room leaving the others stunned in search for Sylvie. Brett was sitting on the bed, Amanda by the door and Olivia on a chair close by. Both detectives were close enough for comfort if that was needed but with enough room to give the blonde space.

Gabby forced a smile at Olivia and Amanda, nodding towards the door. They closed the door behind themselves giving the two some privacy.

Gabby instantly made her way towards Sylvie and hugged her tightly. "Hi… I'm sorry, sweetie."

Brett gripped her back tightly, burying her head in Gabby's shoulder. After a few moments, Gabby pulled back and wiped a few of Sylvie's stray tears away.

Sylvie forced a small laugh. "There's nothing to be sorry about."

"Yes. There is. If I had known that Benson and Rollins were going to arrive this early or even that Rollins was coming in the first place, I would have been by your side in an instant." Gabby took Sylvie's face in her hands. "Please know that."

Sylvie nodded and genuinely smiled as she hugged Gabby again. "I know."

After a few moments, Gabby pulled back and nodded to the door. "You ready to go back out there?"

"Yeah." Sylvie nodded and allowed Gabby to pull her to her feet. "As long as you don't go all "Rambo" on the others."

Dawson smirked, holding up the Scouts' Honor sign before taking Brett's hand and leading her back out. Shay made eye-contact with Gabby and nodded to her room so Gabby set Sylvie down on the sofa next to Stella, nodded a silent apologize towards all of them and followed her best friend.

As soon as the door closed, Gabby was in Shay's arms, gripping tightly and trying not to cry. It didn't work. "I can't do this."

Shay gripped back just as tightly, nodding against Gabby's shoulder. "Yes, you can. You, Gabriela Dawson, are the strongest woman I know. Heck, not even just woman but person. And that includes Severide."

Gabby couldn't help but smirk, pulling back. "He's going to hold that against you if I tell him, you know?"

"Gabriela Dawson breaking the rules?" Shay smirked back, referring to the rules of friendship. "Who would've thought of that?"

Gabby smiled; Shay knew her too well. "Ready to go back out?" Shay spoke up after a few moments.

Gabby nodded, accepting Shay's hand and allowing her to lead her back out. She checked on Sylvie first before turning to the others. "I'm sorry… For yelling earlier. I wasn't trying to be rude, I was just…"

"Trying to protect your friend." Amanda smiled, clearly accepting her apology as did the others.

After a few moments, Sylvie slowly stood up and made her way over to them. "I can still hear you know." The others laughed. "How about we stop with the mushy stuff and do something fun? Shay, you still have some drinks and any games in mind?"

"Girl, it's me."

Everyone including Brett couldn't help but laugh or smirk at that comment. They all took a seat around the kitchen table whilst Shay grabbed a couple of bottles of tequila, Chilli grabbed water for herself, and Erin grabbed some shot glasses and chaser beers.

"Spin the bottle?" Shay smirked, already knowing the answer.

Gabby smiled and gently nudged her. "Watch yourself."

"How about 'Never Have I Ever'?"

The others all exchanged a glance at Sylvie's suggestion so Brett started anyway, pouring herself a shot of tequila. "Never have I ever been a paramedic."

One shot and an instant refill. The others just looked on in shock.

"Never have I ever had a best friend as a partner." Another shot. "Never have I ever been engaged." Another shot.

"Sylvie…"

"You know what? I should probably just take that." Sylvie simply grabbed the bottle, ignoring everyone else. "Never have I ever been raped."

Sylvie didn't even bother to pour another shot, instead just choosing to drink out of the bottle. She made it through almost the entire rest of the bottle before Olivia reached over and pulled it away from her. "Okay, honey, I think you've had enough."

Sylvie forced a smile before grabbing both Stella and Gabby's chaser beers. "What's enough when you're already as ruined as I am?"

Gabby was frozen on the verge of tears and Shay was trying to concentrate on the both of them. Chilli left the table- no matter how much she was worried about her partner, there was too much temptation and she knew that would only make things worse for the others if she gave in. Amanda looked over at Olivia and took a shot, signalling that she was thinking about Sylvie's last statement. Olivia simply rubbed her detective's back comfortingly before following Gabby and Shay into a bedroom. It was only Stella and Erin who could act. Erin took the beers from Brett's hands whilst Stella lead the blonde away from the table and onto the sofa.

Instantly her arms were around Sylvie, hugging her close. "Shh… It's okay, you're okay…". She whispered, nodding at Shay to take Gabby to another room. Olivia and Amanda followed. Chilli was presumably in her room and after Erin cleaned up a little, she grabbed the remote and joined the two on the sofa.

She flipped through a few shows before she came across a rerun of 'Third Watch'. Sylvie laughed slightly and sat up a little.

"You know, I used to watch this in High School. I actually decided to become a Paramedic because of Kim and Bobby."

Erin and Stella exchanged a smile before Stella spoke up. "You never told me that."

"I never knew what I wanted to be as a kid. I knew that I wanted to help people but I was never cut out for being a police officer or joining the Army or anything like that, and I'm not really a fan of hospitals so I didn't want to be a doctor or a nurse, and then I started watching 'Third Watch' and I immediately knew that I wanted to be a paramedic."

"Hank Voight inspired me." Erin started, making eye-contact with Sylvie. "I was a street kid, you know? One time he busted me but instead of charging me and putting me in Juvie, he gave me his card. I called him about three days later and he and his wife took me in. Man changed my life."

"Well I just thought the uniforms were hot." Stella started her story and the others couldn't help but laugh. "What? They are! Anyway, there were no openings in the department so I figured I may as well train as a Paramedic until there were."

"Very inspiring." Sylvie smirked mockingly; clearly the alcohol in her system was having an affect.

Stella nudged her gently, smirking back. "Dude… You got your inspiration from a TV show. I don't think you're in any place to judge."

In the other room, Shay was doing her best to keep Gabby calm. She knew all too well how to handle her best friend's panic attacks but this one seemed different. Olivia and Amanda were trying their best to help but made sure to keep their distance. Shay was literally the only one Dawson would allow to touch her when she was in a bad state, and that included Casey and Antonio.

"You're okay. Just breathe, babe."

Slowly, Gabby released her death grip on Shay's hands. Shay smiled reassuringly, cupping Dawson's face. "Good girl."

"Brett?"

Of course Gabby's first thought whilst coming to was the concern for her friend. Who would have excepted any less?

Amanda smiled, both her and Olivia moving a little closer. "She's okay. Stella and Erin are with her."

"I should be there too."

Gabby went to stand but all three stopped her as Olivia spoke up. "Not right now. Now, you need to take care of you."

"I'm fi-"

"You're fine." Shay cut her off. "We know, but right now, honey, you need a break."

Gabby waited a few moments before finally meeting Shay's gaze. "Promise?"

"Like a lie could ever get past Gabriela Dawson." Shay smirked causing Gabby to smile.

After half an hour (which Dawson timed), the four emerged from the bedroom. Chilli was still in her room, presumably waiting until there was no more temptation in sight. After all, AA meetings weren't exactly easy to access where they were.

Dawson immediately moved to be with Sylvie, taking Erin's place on the sofa and immediately engulfing the blonde in a hug. "I'm sorry."

Sylvie gripped her back, smiling slightly. "I'm drunk."

"Yes, you are." Everyone couldn't help but laugh as Brett pulled back. Dawson stood up and held out her hand, helping the blonde up. "I think it may be time to go to bed."

Sylvie faux pouted but allowed Erin to take her to the bathroom to get cleaned up nonetheless. Olivia and Amanda double checked the security whilst Shay pulled Stella aside when everyone else was distracted, whispering. "Gabby can't stay with Brett tonight. All of this… It's taking too much of a toll on her."

Stella nodded in agreement, looking over at Dawson whom was back on the sofa, trying to focus on the TV. "I know. I've noticed. Don't worry, you take Gabby tonight, Chilli and I can switch out between the bed and floor with Brett, Erin has her room, and I'll ask Olivia and Amanda to stay."

"They're staying right next door…?"

"I know. But it might make both Sylvie and Gabby feel safer for the night."

Shay nodded and smiled. "Thank you."

A/N: I started this story mainly for me. However, I received a very cruel PM last Tuesday telling me that I had no idea how survivors of rape felt and reacted. This hurt a lot. I know that there are people out there who are survivors or angry but trust me, I know what rape is like. I was first molested when I was two, first raped when I was three, first gang raped when I was four. That happened every two weeks of the month until I was twelve. I live with severe PTSD so please don't tell me how a survivor copes. The only thing that gets me through the days is knowing that my sisters and best girl friends are there for me whenever I need them. Everyone copes in their own way but please don't judge others.