Chapter 27

Manhattan Hope Hotel, Manhattan Beach, California

Tuesday, January 14th 2016

1.46 pm

Olivia and the kids were back at the pool on the roof of the hotel. After breakfast they'd been to do some shopping but then after lunch the kids had asked to be allowed to go back to the pool and Olivia hadn't objected. She now sat with a book while the kids played and Nanny Sue sat beside her with George sleeping in a bassinette shaded by a large umbrella.

The kids laughter filled the air and Olivia was listening to them with one ear while enjoying her murder mystery novel.

"Daddy!" Alexandra and Liliana's voice echoed around the roof top.

Olivia froze. There was no way … or there was but her heart was hoping he was there and her head was hoping he wasn't. She pretended not to have heard for a moment but then when her whole body was suddenly shaded she looked up from her book and saw Elliot.

He looked like he hadn't slept since Olivia and the family had left, and the truth was Olivia knew he hadn't.

"Elliot." She said taking off her sunglasses.

"Liv." Elliot replied his eyes hooked onto Olivia's.

"Maybe we should go inside to talk." Olivia suggested swinging her feet from the deck chair and standing up. "Nanny Sue we'll be in the room."

With that the two of them made their way to the room Olivia had for herself and George in the hotel. They walked in silence, their minds contemplating what the conversation they were about to have would be like.

Once in the room Olivia went into the bedroom and pulled on a floor length halter neck maxi dress and a flimsy white cardigan before she sat down on the bed waiting for Elliot to talk.

"Why did you run Liv?" Elliot asked her weakly.

"Elliot, my kids heard you saying that you weren't their father, they were hurting and so I bought them away from the source of that hurt." Olivia told him firmly.

Elliot felt the wind leave him, he couldn't believe he'd even said such a thing, he was still in shock with what had come out of his mouth.

"Liv I'm sorry." Elliot whispered.

"It's not me who you should be apologising too." Olivia replied firmly, as much as she wanted to throw her arms around him and say everything was going to be ok she couldn't she had to make him speak with Nicole and Melissa first.

"I know but I have to apologise to you too, Olivia you're my wife and I love you very much please come home with me." He was pleading.

"Not yet, Elliot the kids love it here and so do I, we're here for two weeks and then we'll come home but I am not coming home anytime sooner." Olivia informed him straight.

"Ok uh, I was wondering if I could take Melissa and Nicole out for the afternoon?" Elliot was hoping to make it up to the girls.

"If they'll go with you but what about of the rest of the kids, they haven't seen you since we left either." Olivia replied.

"I know I was hoping we could do dinner, all of us as a family." Elliot told her.

"Sure." Olivia replied nodding.

"Elliot walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her. For a moment she hesitated but quickly her doubts left her mind as she thought of what Kathy had said the previous day. She didn't want to argue with him anymore, she wanted to just be with her family and enjoy it.

"I love you." He mumbled into his ear and Olivia could hear the cries locked in his throat, she could tell he thought he may have just lost them all forever.

"I love you too Elliot." She replied her voice cracking at the mere thought of losing him.

The Strip, Manhattan Beach, California

Tuesday, January 14th 2016

2.54 pm

Elliot walked hand in hand with Nicole down The Strip. Melissa walked a few paces ahead. It seemed to Elliot that Nicole was much quicker to forgive then the teenager walking ahead of him, she'd only agreed to come because Olivia had persuaded her to.

"Chipmunk do you want a bear when we get to build a bear?" Elliot asked, he knew thirteen would be a little old for teddy bears but he had to ask.

"Stop calling me that." She told him angrily.

"But I've called you Chipmunk since you were sick years old." He replied a little disheartened.

"Yes well I'm not six anymore." Melissa snapped.

"Ok I'm sorry." Elliot replied gently.

Melissa said nothing more and carried on walking. Elliot sighed, he didn't know where to begin asking for his teenager's forgiveness, he couldn't remember things from Maureen and Kathleen and the twins had barely been teenagers when they had left New York.

When they arrived at the build a bear factory Elliot didn't know where to begin, he wanted to buy one for everyone but he had no idea how or where to start.

"Mel." Elliot called the teenager to his side.

"What?" She snapped, she really wasn't going to make this easier on him.

"Uh well if you don't want a bear could you help me with everyone else's?" He asked her.

"I didn't say I didn't want a bear." Melissa replied a little softer.

"Oh ok if you want a bear sweetie you go right ahead and make one." He smiled and she nodded and joined Nicole's side where she was trying to choose which bear she wanted.

Elliot went to enlist the help of one of the workers who could help him make bears for everyone else. Someone quickly joined him while he chose which bears he wanted for his family.

He chose a cat each for Liliana and Alexandra, they adored cats and couldn't understand why they weren't allowed a real one at home. He then chose dogs for Alyah and Elysah and he chose a rabbit for George before choosing a simple purple bear for Olivia.

Melissa chose a polar bear for herself, a sheer white and fluffy one that she thought was adorable and Nicole finally settled on a penguin.

Together and with the spotty teenage boy who worked in the store they chose outfits and created their bears. Elliot recorded messages to put in Olivia's for fun and proceeded to dress them with the Melissa and Nicole laughing at the variety of choices and options.

It took nearly three hours to complete everything and leave the store. Nicole was far more excited about her bear than Melissa was but Elliot was sure that was to do with the six year age difference.

"Daddy can we get some ice cream now?" Nicole asked as she took his hand.

"How about we go back to the hotel and give everyone their bears and then we can all go out for ice cream together? Daddy wants to spend some time with the twins and Georgie too." He explained.

"Ok!" Nicole beamed, she was really happy about seeing her father again and seemed to have forgotten what he had said back in New York,

"Are you ok with that Chipmunk?" Elliot asked forgetting that she had asked him not to call her that.

"Whatever." She replied shrugging her shoulders.

She clutched her bear in one hand and carried one of the carrier bags from the store in the other. Not that she would ever admit it but she had really enjoyed spending some time with her father, it seemed all of a sudden that everything was going to be ok but she had to admit she still felt uneasy about something that she couldn't even begin to explain.

The Strip, Manhattan Beach, California

Tuesday, January 14th 2016

5.36 pm

When Elliot walked into Olivia's hotel room she found all the kids in there with her watching a movie while she fed George his bottle.

"Hey." She smiled as he came over and planted a chaste kiss on her lips. "Have fun?"

"Yeah." Elliot smiled as he placed the bags on the floor.

He proceeded to take the bears out one at a time and hand them over to his girls who all squealed with excitement at his choices and learning what their father had named their bears.

"I'll put George's in here." He smiled as he walked over to the travel cot. "I thought we could go out to dinner together and then Nicole asked for ice cream so after dinner we could go to that ice cream place on the strip."

"Sure." Olivia replied less than enthusiastically.

"What's up?" He asked sensing something strange about her.

"Nothing." She shrugged as she burped her son.

"Liv…"

"Elliot not now." She snapped quietly and he glanced over at the children who had suddenly become very quiet and weary of their parents.

"Girls why don't you go and get dressed for dinner ok?" Elliot suggested and the girls nodded and complied without arguments.

As soon as the door was closed Elliot watched as Olivia placed George in his car seat and then turn to him.

"So how did things go with Mel and Nic?" She asked.

"Good Nicole is ok with me I think Melissa's a little more hesitant but she was ok and seemed to have fun." Elliot told his wife.

"Good." Olivia sighed before making the bed that the kids had been cuddled in watching the movie.

"What's wrong Liv?" He asked her as she pulled away from the embrace he was trying to give her.

She sighed, he would never understand so why should she even bother to explain, she was confused and frustrated and he was the source of all that.

"What are you doing here Elliot?" She asked him straight and he stared at her in shock.

"Making sure I hadn't lost my family." He informed her.

"Really?" She asked him with one eyebrow raised.

"Yes Olivia, Really. I almost had a heart attack when I got home and saw you'd packed up and gone, Olivia you are my wife, losing you … I couldn't live with myself if I lost you or the kids, I know I hurt you Olivia I do but I am sorry I didn't mean any of it, I love you and the kids so much you're all I have to live for and I couldn't bear it if I lost that, if I lost you." He told her tears twinkling in his eyes.

"Then you have to start remembering what we were like before the kids, before us was even an equation, I love you with all my heart Elliot but you have to allow me to be my own person, stop trying to control me and don't say you don't because you do without even realising it, trying to tell me when to work and when to be a Mom." She informed him and he nodded as one tear escaped down his cheek.

"I'm sorry Liv, I just guess I was just used to your Mom being there for the kids and not a Nanny, you know they had some family there and you would be there as much as you could be and I was scared that with your Mom gone you wouldn't be there for our kids as much and you're right in saying they're our kids and I need to make some changes, no more all nighters in work unless absolutely necessary and no work on Sunday's either, even if you have to work then I will take the kids to Mass." Elliot said and Olivia smiled.

"I love you El, I just miss us you know the way we were before I became Captain and had George." Olivia whispered and he nodded and pulled her into his arms, latching his lips onto hers in the process.

"Ugh seriously?" Melissa groaned as she walked in on them kissing.

"Sorry Mel what do you want?" Olivia asked as she pulled away from Elliot and looked at her eldest daughter.

"To let you know we're all ready to go when you are." Melissa told her Mom.

"Sure, I just need to change and get George into his pushchair then we'll go ok?" Olivia smiled.

"Sure whatever." Melissa sighed before turning on her heels and leaving the room.

"She has great timing." Elliot snorted as he laughed.

"Yeah, I think she gets that from you." Olivia winked playfully and Elliot grinned back at her.

La Grooves, Manhattan Beach, California

Tuesday, January 14th 2016

6.34 pm

Dinner was perfect, the family basked in the time they had together completely stress free with no work to get in the way, Elliot was yet to tell Olivia that he would have to fly back tomorrow afternoon. He was scared that she'd be angry and then not come home at all.

"Hey El." Olivia called over the table and he snapped out of his thoughts and looked over at her.

"What is it?" Elliot asked.

"Tomorrow we go home." She told him and he broke out into a wide grin.

"Are you sure?" He asked and she nodded happily.

"I think we've all had enough Californian sun for the winter." She smiled.

He couldn't be happier now, he was taking his family home and he was going to look forward to getting everything back to normal.

"No Mom I have barely seen Aunt Caroline!" Melissa groaned.

"Mel they're coming to ours for the Easter holidays." Olivia replied softly.

"That's four whole months away! You said we were going to be here for two weeks I was planning on spending some time with Montana!" Melissa yelled.

"Mel you can spend all the time you want with Montana when she comes to New York." Olivia replied.

"That's not fair!" Melissa yelled jumping to her feet.

"Melissa Jasmine sit down right now." Olivia warned.

"But Mom…"

"But Mom nothing Melissa we're going home tomorrow and you will see your cousins in April when they come over for two weeks ok?" Olivia asked.

"But I want to see them this week like you promised…"

"I didn't promise anything and I am not having this argument with you Melissa." Olivia replied, she couldn't understand why her daughter was being so difficult.

"Oh no you bow down to Elliot's every want but when I ask you if I can spend some time with the only family I have you're a total bitch about it!" Melissa screamed before walking off.

Olivia was shaking with anger, she couldn't believe what Melissa had just said.

"Melissa!" Olivia yelled rushing out after her daughter.

She found Melissa sat on the swing of the playground that the restaurant had. Olivia took the swing beside her and slowly pushed herself so she was swinging at a gentle speed.

"What's gotten into you Melissa?" Olivia asked as he daughter looked at the setting sun.

Melissa said nothing but shifted in her seat uncomfortably.

"You know that we're your family too Mel, I may not have given birth to you but I am still your Mother." Olivia continued guessing that Melissa wasn't going to reply to that question.

"I know." Melissa whispered wiping her cheeks from the tears that glistened there.

"And Elliot is your Dad too, he may not be the name on your adoption certificate but he doesn't love you any less than he loves the rest of your siblings and that includes Nicole, I know what he said sounded harsh but he wasn't trying to hurt you, he was mad with me and he said it while he was angry and he didn't mean a word of it." Olivia informed her and she could see Melissa nodding gently.

"I know." She said again in a mere hoarse whisper.

"Then why are you so angry Mel?" Olivia asked.

"I don't know." Melissa replied before a sob escaped her parted lips.

Olivia quickly jumped from her swing and rushed over to Melissa, wrapping her arms around her daughter and holding her tight.

"Melissa what's wrong baby? Talk to me please!" Olivia hated seeing any of her children hurting.

"I don't know what's wrong Mommy I just feel so sad all the time and I can't control it, even when I was with Dad today I was enjoying myself but I couldn't stop feeling sad!" She cried hard into her Mother's chest.

"Ok baby, it's ok when we get back to New York we'll get you someone to talk to ok?" She whispered.

"I can't stop feeling sad Mommy, ever since Nanny and Granddad died I feel so lost and alone and doesn't matter how loud I scream no one can hear me!" She cried and Olivia felt her own tears sting her eyes, hearing her daughter convey such deep emotions ripped her heart out of her chest and not because she couldn't stop it but because she knew exactly how her baby was feeling, she'd been feeling exactly the same.

"We'll get you help Mel I promise, I will do whatever I can to help make these feelings go away!" Olivia sobbed and Melissa gripped tighter to her mother.

"I'm so sorry Mommy, so so sorry." She cried.

"It's ok Melly, it's ok you can't help how you feel I promise that you will feel better once you get some help ok?" Olivia kissed her daughter's head and ran her hand through her long golden coloured hair. "Now wipe your tears and we're going to go back inside ok?"

"Ok." Melissa nodded still not letting go of Olivia. "I'm sorry Mom. I love you."

"I love you too Melissa, more than I think you'll ever know, you're my first born." She smiled.

"That makes me special then?" Melissa asked with a twinkle in her eyes.

"You're all special in your unique way and I love you all the same." Olivia smiled before kissing the tip of Melissa's nose making her smile.

Sooo?