Chapter Sixteen

Heather was working late, and wouldn't be home until after midnight, so it was up to Mark to provide dinner. He really wasn't a bad cook.

I helped Josh clean up the kitchen afterwards, while Zack did some homework. I took a look here and there, curious to see what kind of work he had to do. Just from watching, it wasn't hard to figure out that I was so far behind. It'd been awhile since I'd had any kind of lessons from Esme, and though I didn't exactly feel stupid, I knew I should probably get back on that when I got home.

After the kitchen was clean, Josh had to get started on his own homework, so I wandered into the living room. I was intending to check on my cell phone again, just in case, but I found Mark instead. He was seated in the recliner I was always lounging in, the lamp on beside him as he seemed to be comparing the writing on two different pieces of paper.

He almost looked like a completely different person when he was concentrating.

I didn't want to disturb him, so I turned, but the movement caught his attention anyway.

"Oh, hey." He spoke, and I looked back at him. He laughed. "Don't mind me. Do you need anything?"

"No." I replied with a small smile. "Just everyone's busy."

He chuckled, setting the papers to the side. "I'm glad they're actually doing their homework for once, but I'm sorry you're lonely. I might not be as entertaining as they are, but I'm free to keep you company."

Taking his offer, I drifted closer.

"So tell me." He prompted as I sat down on the couch. "Why didn't you seem surprised that Ken was here earlier?"

I'd expected that.

"Because I wasn't." I admitted with a shrug. "I knew he was here, but Alice chased him off."

"Alice?" He laughed a little.

"She's tough." I confirmed. "I'm pretty sure he listened to her. At least I hope." He sighed, looking down as he closed and set a folder aside.

"I admit, I'm left feeling a little out of the loop." He smiled a little sadly. "Jack was in our lives pretty much since Zack was born. She was tense, but Heather never let on that anything was wrong with that."

"She's better than I am." I replied quietly. "I couldn't do that."

"I'd met Ken a few times after that." He continued. "Summer trips to California brought us his way. Again, she never let on that anything was wrong there, but I will admit I wondered why she stopped going on those trips. Come to find out, out of the blue, that there was quite a lot wrong with that."

I didn't know what to say, so I just watched him.

"I'm a little confused." He admitted apologetically.

"There was a lot she didn't want to tell you about her."

"Oh, believe me." He nodded. "I understood. It's not been the easiest to get her to open up about her past, but I never held that against her. I always figured she'd tell me when she was ready. I only wish she'd told me sooner, because I could have done more to protect her."

I couldn't help smiling a little. He saw that and smiled as well, understanding what I wasn't saying.

"Though I've never known her to be the kind that needed protecting." He added, and I laughed. He leaned back in the chair, keeping the conversation open and light. "You and her go way back."

"I know." I nodded. "She told me about that."

"What I don't quite understand, is what brought Ken here in the first place." He said. "Him being here has really brought out a whole new side to her I've never seen."

"You've never had to see it before." I pointed out, but I looked down. "I feel so bad about that."

"About what?" He asked, and I shrugged.

"Showing him where her house is." I muttered. "I didn't know who he was, or I never would have gone with him that day."

"She can handle her own. Honey, she's tough, and I know for a fact that she doesn't blame you at all."

"I know." I kept my eyes down.

"But you blame yourself." He nodded. "I get it, but if there's one person I know can handle it, it's her. That woman has done nothing but fight for the way she wanted to live from the day I met her. Absolutely no one was going to stand in her way. I didn't think I had a chance in hell, she was so independent." I looked up. "But thankfully, I understood that. It was all on her terms, and I was perfectly fine with that. A little setback like this isn't going to budge her. She's made of steel, baby."

I smiled a little again at the term of endearment.

"So don't you feel bad, okay?" He continued. "She'll handle it her way, and I wouldn't expect any less." I hesitated, but sighed and nodded. "Although, the way she talks about him, I'm a little concerned."

"Why?" I asked, a little nervous now.

"She's preparing for the worst." He replied. "Like even she doesn't know what to expect from him."

"Maybe she doesn't." I said. "It's hard to stay one step ahead of a psycho."

"I never got that impression from either of them." He wasn't denying it. Only surprised.

"I don't know Ken that well." I sighed. "But I knew Jack better than anyone, and I still couldn't figure out how he got away with most of the stuff he got away with. If he was anything like Ken, I get why she's preparing for the worst."

He studied me for a second, and I forced a small smile. Reaching up, I gathered the top of my shirt at the collar, and moved it down. Far enough to show him the round, jagged scar I lived with. The one I'd gotten the time Jack had come within seconds of getting his revenge on me for running my mouth.

He leaned forward again, inspecting said scar with a frown. I knew he figured out rather easily what it was caused by, but I said it anyway.

"I died twice that day." I told him, and he met my eyes. "Jack tried to kill me because I didn't back down. I wanted to back down. So bad, but I couldn't, so he shot me."

"I can't imagine." He sighed sadly, shaking his head.

"I know." I fixed my shirt. "Not that many people can, but like I said. If Jack was anything like Ken, it's a good thing Heather is preparing like she is. She knows better than anyone how far he's okay with taking it."

"And you were alone with Ken?" He asked, surprised. I nodded.

"I think there was some kinda truce today." I admitted. "He was here to talk to me, but he didn't pull anything. I don't know if he would have eventually, but Alice made him leave."

"In any case, I'm so glad she was here." He replied sincerely. I nodded in agreement. He sighed. "I know one day I'll know the full story. Until then, I'll just do what I can to back her up."

"She knows that." I smiled. "And I know it helps her more than anything else."

We fell quiet for a second, and I looked away. The light from the lamp caught my attention, but the second I looked at it, pain stabbed through my head. I nearly flinched away from it, wincing as I rubbed my forehead. That was highly unpleasant.

"You okay?" Mark noticed.

"Headache." I muttered, and he nodded.

"I was told you sometimes get them." He replied. "There is a bottle of Ibuprofen in the medicine cabinet upstairs if you need it." I did what I could to shake it off, but it was already in place.

"Yeah." I mumbled. I stood up, but I could barely stand opening my eyes.

"Maybe you should lay down?" He asked, concerned now.

"Maybe." I agreed with a sigh.

Thankfully, he helped me up the stairs because a solid wave of dizziness nearly made me fall from the top step, but he was there to steady me.

"It'll go away." I assured him once I was laying down on Josh's bed. "It happens sometimes."

I had to admit, the pain was plenty familiar enough for me to be able to say that. Though it did want to scare me, it felt too good to shut my eyes.

"Feel better, sweetie." He replied sadly. "Just call if you need anything. I'll leave the door open."

"Thank you." I mumbled gratefully, and he nodded.

I curled up as close to the wall as I could get, and barely remembered closing my eyes before I was asleep. I woke up very briefly when the boys went to bed, but the sound of the rain hitting the window pulled me back into sleep.

For the first time in a very long time, I woke up choking. I recognized this feeling. Like my lungs refused to work, and like my throat was closed, but the burning I felt in it was new. I had a split second to finish reacting to that intense feeling before I was sitting upright.

I hated this feeling so much, especially knowing I couldn't pretend it was nothing as Josh scrambled out of bed. As he turned on the lamp, I sat curled tensely and trembling as I fought to bring myself out of that place.

I ached, and it hurt so bad, but I fought it back.

"Dammit." I sobbed in a whisper to myself. "Please not here."

I did inventory. Which one had it been? Where had that feeling come from? But I couldn't find it.

"Leandra?" Josh now sat beside me. He didn't look the slightest bit annoyed. Only worried. I hated that look.

"God, I'm so stupid." I folded forward, my sobs only renewing.

"No you're not." Josh replied immediately, his hand lightly resting on my back. "You're not stupid."

"Yes I am." I countered. "It's not fair."

He sighed heavily and hugged my curled ball. I could tolerate it at that point, but I didn't uncurl to return it. He held me like that until I started to calm down. Then he pulled away only far enough to lean down in an effort to find my eyes.

"You're not stupid." He repeated in a whisper. "Don't be so mean to yourself."

"Why shouldn't I?" I asked in my own bitter whisper. "I hate myself."

"Why would you do that? I kinda like you."

I forced a small smile. "You don't know me like I know me."

"I don't have to." He settled closer, sitting beside me against the wall.

"It would help." I countered, looking over at him. "Maybe."

"Nah, I don't think so." He shook his head a little. "I like you just like you are. You waking up at night doesn't change anything."

We both fell quiet, looking up at the top bunk as we clearly heard a snore from Zack. I had to laugh a little at the irony.

"So what was it?" Josh asked quietly, and my small smile faded as I looked down. I didn't feel like answering that.

"You don't wanna know that." I shook my head a little. "It'll only get to you."

"Maybe." He replied. "But I think I should know anyway. If it'll help me help you. After all, it's my job now, right?"

"Job?"

"Boyfriend." He laughed a little. "Just kidding." I laughed a little as well, unable to help it.

"I won't ever have a boyfriend." I told him confidently.

"Me neither." He sighed, and I had to laugh again. He laughed, scooting forward. I frowned a little as he climbed off the bed.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"I can't sleep." He replied, offering me his hand. "Let's go sneak some ice cream."

That was perfectly fine by me. Before I could even move, though, I jumped with a yelp as Zack suddenly sat up in the bed above me.

"Ice cream?"

I had to laugh with them. They were really starting to turn a not-so-good night into a not-that-bad one.

We descended the stairs as quietly as we could, the entire first level of the house was dark. I let Josh lead the way since I couldn't see a damn thing, holding onto the back of his shirt. I was less than accustomed to moving through the dark. Zack followed me, his hand holding lightly onto the back of my shirt.

Considering we were sneaking, we were as quiet as we could be as we headed straight for the kitchen. It was interesting, and definitely enough to distract me.

Through the window beside the back door to the right side of the kitchen, cloudy moonlight illuminated the yard outside. It was late, and everything looked different in the dark. It'd finally stopped raining, but somehow, the clear night made it creepier.

Two things seemed to happen at once. My mind was already working a million miles a minute, thanks to the dream I'd just woken up from, so I caught little details. Josh turned to reach for the dim light over the stove, and at the same time, a shadow crossed the window.

My heart reacted before I even realized what it was I saw. It was very brief, not quite a second, but it scared me. That 'not-so-bad' night feeling vanished, and I froze up.

"Leandra?" Zack had heard my intake of breath, and had noticed. Josh's attention was captured as well, keeping him from turning the light on. I then questioned what I'd seen. I wanted to deny it, but I was also confident in what I saw.

"Hold on." I whispered breathlessly.

What I'd seen was the shape of a person, nothing else would have been big enough to make that kind of a shadow across such a big window, but I was a little nervous to approach the door by myself. I waited for it again for only a few seconds before I started toward the window. With a sinking heart, I noted that the kitchen window was open a little bit, as a breeze ruffled the curtain.

Zack followed me. Without question, he was right there, and Josh followed him.

I was slow in approaching, but I was startled and I stopped quickly enough for Zack to run into me when I saw the shadow again, but this time, it was followed by a very bright light that illuminated the entire window and the glass of the back door.

There was someone moving around out there on the back porch. I knew instantly that it was no one from my family, because we'd seen it at all. My family would have known exactly where we were in the house and avoided detection.

The boys had clearly seen it too, because Josh was suddenly pulling Zack back a step.

"Go get dad." Josh whispered to him, and Zack instantly rounded. He only paused long enough to peek out the window above the sink before jumping back.

"The porch is on fire." He called, running full sprint for the stairs. "Dad!" The sharpness of his shouted voice got me moving.

Josh took my arm next in an attempt to move me away from the door, but I resisted. Instead, I moved forward. I reached for the door knob, but Josh stopped me. He unlocked it and pulled it open himself right as we heard quick footsteps thudding down the stairs.

Instantly, we were both hit by very thick, black smoke. The very intense heat and smoke alone were strong enough to move me back a step. I bumped into Josh, and I got one good look at the porch through the smoke. Fire was literally everywhere, from the wood of the deck, to the posts and railings keeping the roof and ceiling up, and it was climbing. It would reach Mark and Heather's room once it was done with the porch.

I'd never been in this kind of smoke before. It burned my eyes and nose at the same time, forcing me to cough as it instantly sent burning pain through my lungs. Josh turned away, in the same state I was.

"Get away from the door!"

Mark approached us quickly from behind, jerking Josh back before reaching for me. I allowed him to move me, reaching up to cover my mouth and nose at the same time, as the smoke was burning my eyes badly. Mark pulled me away fast enough to make me stumble, and slammed the door shut.

He quickly herded us away from the back door, toward the kitchen table. I took the hint, turning away. The window over the sink was still open, and smoke was flooding through that into the kitchen like a rushing river. In the dark kitchen, it was terrifying to see that as our only source of light.

"What the heck is even happening?" Zack was panicking.

"Go outside, and call 9-1-1." Mark replied firmly, tossing his phone to Zack. Without another word, he opened the back door and ran out. Closing the door behind him. I worried about him, but at the moment, my lungs were throwing a fit. My entire chest and throat felt closed. Zack spoke his name and listed the address into the phone, through his own coughs. I knew that meant he was talking to the police.

I couldn't stop coughing or even get a breath, and the kitchen was absolutely filled with smoke. I almost couldn't make out the shape of the illuminated window. It was a physical feeling, being surrounded by this smoke. In my panic, I completely forgot what Mark had told us to do, so I froze. Even through the fabric of my shirt, I still couldn't breathe. I couldn't speak, or even see. My mind was in a disoriented panic, and I was stuck leaning against the kitchen table.

Seconds later, Mark came back into the house.

"Move it!"

He wasted no time in grabbing for Zack, who was closest and in about the same state I was. Grabbing his shirt, forcing him around and nearly shoving him forward. He actually picked me up and carried me sideways while moving the boys quickly for the front door.

When he meant business, he meant business.

He felt along the hall, because the smoke was flowing quickly this direction too, but carrying me, I must have slowed him down. He made it, though, and Josh threw open the front door.

The night outside was damp, but it was very welcome as Mark quickly crossed the lawn, and set me down on the sidewalk beside the mailbox. He took the phone from Zack, who crouched down with his own coughs. Now that I could see clearly, despite my eyes burning badly, I was surprised to see that the smoke had actually clung to the skin of Zack's face, painting it dark gray. Just below his nose, the gray paint was thicker, and his eyes were red and irritated. I vaguely wondered if I looked like that, but that soon no longer mattered.

I was so disoriented, all I could do was sit down and try to catch a single breath. A solid minute passed where I felt like I couldn't breathe at all. My coughing was making me dizzy, but I was never more grateful to lean forward and touch the cool grass in front of me.

"What the hell was that?" Josh was looking around. He had the same gray on his face as Zack did, but not as badly.

From here, we could see the the outside back side of the house completely lit up. It was brighter than any fire I'd ever seen, illuminating the neighbors houses on either side and the trees further back. I didn't even know if Mark knew about the shadow we'd seen. That little detail was probably lost in the panic. I knew I wasn't thinking about it that much.

Another minute maybe two passed, and I was a little surprised to look up the street and spot Richard running over. He must have been called or something, because it was very late at night.

He crouched beside me and Zack, looking at us.

"Are you guys okay?" He asked, and though my chest was still burning, I nodded.

"It was a person." Josh was the one that remembered to say something. I nodded again, confirming that I'd seen it too. "Someone was out there, right before it started."

"You're kidding me." Richard snapped, looking around quickly. He didn't sound like he was skeptical, though. Only mad.

"You three, go to my house. Stay there until we come and get you. I'll be here to help your dad." Josh took my arm and helped me to my feet. Before we could really move, though, we could clearly see the inside of the house lighting up as well through the front door, which meant the fire had gotten inside.

"Go on. Andrew should be waiting." Richard urged us. Josh got Zack up as well, and he led us away. I couldn't run, but I could walk rather quickly. We made it to Richard's house right as the fire truck was getting there, just rounding the corner up ahead.

We hesitated on the porch, though, watching the truck quickly pass right by us.

"Come on." Josh pressed us forward, toward the door. "We can see better from upstairs." He had a point.

We walked in to find Andrew on the illuminated stairs. The fearful look on his face made me pause. Josh urged me forward, though, and all four of us ascended them. Heading right for Andrew's room which had the closest front-facing window.

The three of them piled on the sill, but I was more tired than anything, sitting on the side of Andrew's bed with another coughing fit. It hurt quite a bit.

"This is crazy." Josh snapped at the window. "Who the hell was that?"

"Who was what?" Andrew asked, almost as alarmed as we were.

"There was someone outside." Zack answered him, and he sounded hoarse. "We saw whoever it was."

"Just the shadow, though." I corrected weakly. I knew I sounded just as hoarse, and they looked back at me. "Whoever it was didn't want us to find out about it as soon as we did." I could see on their faces that I had a point.

It was quiet for a moment while they continued watching.

"Do we still have to go to school tomorrow?" Zack wondered out loud.

"Zack, shut up." Josh snapped. "Our house is burning down, and you're wondering about stupid school?"

"No, they'll save it." Andrew assured him.

"You didn't see how fast it was spreading." Josh replied, less harshly.

"Are you cold?" Andrew asked me, bringing Josh and Zack's attention to me as well. I only then realized how hard I was trembling.

"A little." I admitted, and he moved forward. Grabbing the extra blanket on the end of the bed up and draped it over me. I accepted it gratefully.

"You know.." Zack started. "If Leandra hadn't woken up when she did, we wouldn't have found out about it as soon as we did." Meaning, there would have been a good chance we wouldn't have made it out of there.

I hated that thought. Covering my face with the blanket.

"It's a good thing she was there." Andrew sat beside me.

"Very good thing." Josh agreed with a sigh. He glanced out the window as something caught his attention. "Mom's here."

Zack instantly rounded and jogged out of the room. Josh followed, but I stayed right where I was. Even under the blanket, I was still cold. Oddly, I found myself wishing for that feeling. I wanted that relief of knowing my parent was there to make sure I was okay.

I closed my sore eyes, just trying to warm up as we quietly listened to the boys greeting Heather with a loud recount of every detail they knew. I could only imagine the look on her face when she found out that it'd been a person that started the fire.

"She's up here." We heard Zack's voice starting up the stairs, and I knew they were bringing her up here. I didn't look up, fighting a lot of lonely tears. I felt so stupid, but it was hard as his voice only got closer. "She was cold. I think she got it worse than everyone."

I felt Andrew's arm leave from around my shoulders, and he stood up.

"Leandra." I looked up sharply at Carlisle's worried voice. I was so surprised to see him there, I jumped up and instantly hugged him. The same tears I fought now flung free, and I sobbed into his shoulder. I was so happy to see him, I didn't bother to fight them.

It'd only been a few days since I saw him, but the fact that he was here right now made it a much bigger relief.

He returned my hug tightly, crouching to lift me into his arms with his own relieved sigh.

"Thank you, Leandra." I turned my head to look over at Heather's emotional voice. "Thank you so much." I knew it wasn't lost on her what we'd realized earlier.

"It was Josh's idea to go downstairs." I sniffled, forcing a small laugh, but that faded quickly as I clearly wasn't done crying. I couldn't imagine what she must have felt, realizing herself that her whole family could have been lost while she was working. I had no doubts, though, that that wasn't coincidence. Someone had made sure she wasn't there before lighting that fire, because that someone wanted her to live. This wasn't about me. This had been about her.

I really didn't want to let Carlisle go. It was too much of a relief to see him, and for the oddest reason, I felt like if I let him go, he'd disappear. He kept hold of me too, so I was pretty sure he was fine with that.

"Aw, honey." Heather murmured sadly, smoothing my hair in the back. She saw how forceful my tears were, and I knew she just wanted to comfort me. As if suddenly reminded, I started to cough again. Crying only seemed to have irritated my lungs and throat. Carlisle pulled me back to study my face.

"How long were you breathing in the smoke?" Carlisle asked, clearly concerned.

"Maybe a minute." Josh answered apologetically. "When I opened the back door, it just sort of flooded in so fast. She was right there in front, though, and it was just right there. Even when dad was outside, it was still coming in and it was everywhere. That's when he came back in and made us go outside."

"I see." Carlisle sighed worriedly.

And that's how all three of us got to go back up the street and visit the paramedics that had shown up. Andrew tagged along, not wanting to stay there alone, and Heather volunteered to keep him company.

I was surprised to see that a few cops had shown up, as well as Richard sticking around. This part of the street was busy and completely lit up with flashing lights, which was irritating my eyes and giving me a headache as we sat piled together on the back step of the waiting ambulance.

Zack and I were the only ones that needed the oxygen. Josh was okay, but they made sure. I was given a different blanket, because I was still cold, but I was already feeling better. They didn't like the shallow sound of my breathing, though.

I didn't see any more fire, but there was still a whole lot of smoke pouring out the front door and from the now-lit up back yard.

The most annoying part of the night was when I found out I'd need to stay at the hospital for observation. Apparently breathing in a lot of smoke like that could damage airways and cause a lot of internal problems, and if I wasn't watched closely, it could keep getting worse.

Zack and I looked over as Mark approached with a heavy sigh. I felt so stupid with the oxygen mask over most of my face, but he offered a small smile.

"How are they?" He asked, coming to stand beside Heather.

"The boys will be okay." She replied. "But Leandra's going in for observation."

"Shit." He sighed again. "Geez, what a nightmare." He turned a little, looking back at the house. "The investigation could take all night, so you might want to think about getting a hotel for you guys once statements are taken. They're not sure what this is going to do to the integrity, but at least we're all okay."

"Thanks to Leandra." Andrew murmured quietly. He nodded immediately. He stepped forward, sat beside me, and gently hugged me. I returned it, just as grateful that he carried me out.

Since the front of the house and most of the upstairs were fine, Heather was able to go inside and gather some clothes and things for everyone. I was rather surprised when she came back out and handed my bag to Carlisle.

"You're coming home tomorrow." Carlisle explained at my confused look, and that surprised me even more. I didn't want to seem too excited, but I knew Heather could see it.

"I'm so sorry, sweetie." She said.

"It's not your fault." I frowned over at her. "You were working."

"Exactly." She sighed. "I should have been here."

"We'll be fine, mom." Zack tried to comfort her too. It was still bugging Josh, though.

"But.." Josh spoke. "What if whoever that was comes back later?"

I saw the drawback of leaving so suddenly. He and Zack had always had pretty decent lives. They'd never been in the middle of a spot like this before, and they were both rattled pretty badly. With me leaving, I wouldn't be around to help him with it.

I didn't know how to comfort him, so I just placed my arm around him and squeezed him a little, resting my cheek against his arm.

"They won't." Heather told him. "But if they do, they'll have me to deal with."

I knew he trusted his mom, so he didn't say it out loud, but I knew what he was thinking. Almost as if I could read his mind, I knew where his thoughts went because mine went there too. There would be more nights that she worked late. Times she wouldn't be there to be mama bear.

I worried about my friends.

Josh and Zack gave their statements to the cops that came over. I went last, and every story was almost word for word identical. Except mine. Mine had a few more details, but that was because I'd seen it first.

I wasn't that sure about naming Ken specifically, because I didn't know what pointing the finger that way would do or if it'd just mess everything up, so I didn't. I only answered the cop's questions.

Heather left with the boys first, thankfully, so I didn't have to be the one that said goodbye. It was a bittersweet kind of goodbye, but I knew I'd see them again really soon. It wasn't permanent, but the worry made it harder.

Also thankfully, Carlisle was allowed to take me to the hospital himself. I didn't have to ride in the ambulance.

I wasn't ignoring the fact that an attempt had been made on my life, but it was weird not being the only one. All the way to the hospital, I went over the last conversation I had with Ken. I thought it had gone okay, until Alice showed up.

I'd honestly believed that it would be okay. Maybe he didn't know I was still there? Maybe he thought that Jasper and Alice had come to take me home, and he wasn't after me specifically.

Maybe he wanted her to suffer, but what I was caught on, was why he would consider her guilty in the first place. She had nothing to do with Jack's death. I did. The only way that would make sense was if he was trying to hurt us both at once, because he knew I loved her family. Her pain would have been an added bonus? Both her sons for his son.

"Leandra?" Carlisle's quiet voice shook me out of my thoughts, and I looked around for the first time since leaving that house. We were already at the hospital, and through the light drizzling rain on the windows, it was bright.

"Sorry." I sighed. "Just thinking. None of it makes any sense."

"I can't begin to tell you how relieved I am that you're okay."

I forced a sad smile. "In a way, you can thank Jack for that. If I had woken up a few minutes later.. Who even knows?"

"Leandra, do you really believe it was Ken?" He asked, and I hesitated. "I need to know that you're certain. Completely positive."

"I don't know." I mumbled in reply, looking over at him. "But who else could it have been? Everyone who knows her loves her and her entire family. Who else would want to hurt them?"

"There could be possibilities on Mark's side of things." He replied, and I fell quiet.

"I'd been thinking too small." I understood, and he nodded. I was so glad I had decided against naming Ken specifically. If he wasn't the one, I didn't want them wasting their time.

"I don't want to take a man's life if it isn't absolutely necessary." He sighed. "Even if his past crimes beg for it."

"But.." I whimpered. "What about-"

"We'll take a look after everyone is gone." He assured me, reaching over and gently cupping the side of my head. "If there is any scent left, we'll find the person responsible."

He was so sure, there was literally no choice but to believe him. I took as deep a breath as I could and nodded as I sighed. I didn't want to start crying again.

Briefly, I couldn't help remembering how hard a time I had trusting him in the beginning and even after he came back. It'd been hard, but that trust was still there. I trusted him more than anyone in the world, and I knew he could tell.

"Okay?" He stressed, and I nodded again.

"Okay." I replied this time. I glanced back out the rain-streaked windows at the hospital before I thought about another topic. "Is it safe for me to go back home?"

I knew he was prepared for that question, by how he answered.

"I believe it is safer at home than otherwise." He said. "Tomorrow, I will need your complete cooperation."

"Bella?" I gathered, and he nodded. "Don't worry. I know the rules. Plus.." I hesitated, and he looked over. "Remember the newborn that found me in the woods that day? He said my scent made me off limits. Your scents. I think if I smell like you, it'll be easier for her not to kill me."

"I hadn't considered that." He mused, in thought. "But I believe it's worth a try. Tonight, she and Edward aren't there. She managed to resist human blood this morning, and showed remarkable restraint this afternoon, but I don't want to push it."

I nodded. I sighed my way into another lung spasm, ending in a rough coughing fit. It didn't feel like it was getting any worse, but it wasn't much better either.

That prompted him to nod and leave the car. I took the hint, and followed.

I was so tired at that point, all I wanted to do was sleep, but I needed tests run first. Including x-rays and scans of my chest and throat, just to look for potential problems.

I was able to rest some between interruptions, but Carlisle never left my side. Even when he made the phone call home, filling everyone in on the second half of the events of the night. I just snoozed right through that, despite how excited I was to finally go home.

Thankfully, I didn't have to stay longer than a few hours. Carlisle was given the go-ahead to take me home, but to keep an eye on me closely for the next day or so. I was given a round of antibiotics, just to be on the safe side, and was back in the car about an hour before dawn.

I snoozed all the way home, and was even surprised when we got there so fast. I was tired and sore from being cold for so long, I just wanted to take a shower and crawl into my bed, but I had a few more things I needed to get through first.

Before I was even out of the car all the way, I was wrapped up in a bear hug I recognized instantly. I returned Emmett's hug with a tight one of my own and a small laugh.

"Shorty!" He held me up, but pulled back far enough to look at me. "Where's the rest of you?" I knew he meant my hair, and I laughed again. I couldn't answer that, only hugging him again. I wasn't done, and apparently, neither was he. He sighed heavily, squeezing me gently. "Geez, shorty. You scared us half to death."

"I know." I mumbled against his shoulder. "I'm okay, though. I hope I never have to leave again."

"You won't." He replied, but part of me somehow doubted that. I knew it was just the circumstances, and I'd come to believe him in time.

Even with Esme standing right there, I wasn't ready to let him go yet. She waited patiently for her turn, and as soon as I was on my feet, I was returning her hug.

I was so relieved to see for myself that everyone was okay here. I hadn't even realized how deep that worry ran until I was home. Ultimately, it was a very heartfelt homecoming, and I loved every second of it. It comforted me a lot. Even when Emmett insisted I take a shower, because I smelled and looked like I just crawled out of the fireplace.

I hadn't even had a chance to look at myself yet, so the first look in the mirror startled me. My face and neck were streaked gray, and it was obvious I'd breathed in a lot of smoke. Tears and rain had made paths through the gray painted on my face, but for the most part, it still clung to my skin like a banner.

Once I was clean, and in my most comfortable pajamas, I felt even better. I made sure to choose clothes that had never left this house, just in case Bella were to show up. I didn't doubt my safety one bit, especially with how my family hovered, but I'd have been lying if I told myself I wasn't scared.

I did eventually give in, though. I had to go to bed. I missed sleeping in my own bed the most. There was nothing like sitting there. It felt like years since I'd been in here, which was the strangest part. Morning or not, I was exhausted.

Before I could get too settled, a knock at the slightly-open door had me look over. I smiled a little as Carlisle walked in.

"Hey." I greeted with a sigh.

"How are you?" He asked.

"Better." I nodded. "I missed my bed." I patted it with my hand. "I know I hated it before, but I missed having a bed to myself."

"I'm sorry." He replied, slowly approaching the bed. "I know the arrangement-"

"It was fine." I laughed a little, assuring him. "Josh was nice to let me sleep there. I guess I kicked him a few times." He chuckled, but his smile faded a little as I looked down. "Everything's different now, huh?"

"I wouldn't say that." He sighed, sitting down on my bed as well. "I know it feels like it, but it really isn't." He was quiet for a moment while I inspected my blanket. "How are you otherwise?"

I glanced up. I knew what he meant. It'd been a long time since I'd been able to give my past much thought. My small smile faded at this reminder.

"That doesn't go away." I reminded him. "But talking to Ken helped."

"You spoke with him?"

Alice must not have mentioned that.

"Yeah." I admitted. "But he's gone now, so.. There's that."

"How do you know?" He asked. "And how did talking to that man help you in any way?"

"I got some answers I needed." I replied, glancing up. "Ones I didn't really wanna hear, but it.. It helped, and if he's anything like Jack, he'll keep his word." My voice quieted. "Jack always kept his word."

"You're still bothered." It wasn't a question.

"It's just.." I took a breath. "He looked so normal in the picture Ken showed me of them. When they were kids. Like any other boy."

"Looks can be deceiving." He pointed out. "But during that time in his life, he probably was just a normal boy."

"I guess it's just scary to think about how the things people go through can change who they are when they're older." I admitted. "I still thank my lucky stars every day that you found me and got me out of there when you did."

"So do I." He replied honestly, and I smiled a little.

"If I'd known back then what it would be like, I would have told you a lot quicker."

"Hind-sight." He nodded. "But you did. I can't imagine how hard it was for you to give up like that and tell me."

"It was the hardest thing I've ever done." I admitted quietly. "But you know why. I had so much to lose, not even just my life."

"I know." He nodded again. "But you also had even more to gain."

"And I gained." I agreed. "And I lost, but I gained again, and that's because of you guys. One day, I promise I'm gonna repay you."

"You already do." He assured me sincerely without a pause. "Every day. We truly are the lucky ones, Leandra."

I laid down for a much-needed nap not long later. My head ached a little, and my stomach felt iffy, but laying down helped almost immediately.

I woke up, forcing myself out of a nightmare involving fire. A lot of it. It was very brief, but bright enough to make my head hurt. My coughs as I sat up were actually what reminded me.

These coughs were an awful lot like the ones I'd been in the middle of when I woke up that night. If that's what it actually was that woke me up, then..

"Alice." I called ahead of myself as I climbed out of bed.

I left my room to find the living room crowded. Everyone, aside from Edward or Bella were in this room. Even as Esme left the room. Nobody seemed upset. More just being together. I had a feeling that the baby sitting upright in Rose's arms was the reason. I hadn't seen much of her yet, but I was surprised that she was older than I expected her to be. I barely recognized her.

"What is it, Leandra?" Alice asked, and I knew she wasn't the only one curious, but I didn't mind that. I didn't feel obligated to hide this part from anyone.

"Something's different." I replied, sitting on the armrest of the chair she sat in. "I couldn't figure it out until I woke up just now."

"I heard." Carlisle frowned. "I still worry about that cough."

As if reminded, Esme suddenly reappeared holding a mug out to me. I smelled it, and took the cup of tea easily. "Thank you." I sipped it, and smiled before I spoke again.

"Yeah.." I waved off Carlisle's comment a little, holding the cup between both hands. "But I woke up doing that before the fire even happened. That's why we were awake last night. It was so much like the other times, I didn't notice at first."

Alice frowned a little in thought. She wasn't understanding what I was getting at.

"All this time I've only seen things months away." I pointed out, and she understood. "Never something minutes away."

"There would be a few explanations for that." She replied, looking up at me. "Of course the main reason would probably be that your gift is just getting stronger. More sure of itself."

"Oh." I muttered, frowning.

"Another explanation could be.." She paused for a sigh. "It could mean that whoever caused that fire made a very split decision to do so."

"What's a split decision?" I asked, curious.

"Split second decision." She explained. "I means they only decided to do it right before they did it. Though I don't believe something like this could possibly have been pulled off in a split decision, it means he.. Whoever it is.. Wasn't directly planning it."

"How can someone not directly plan something?" I frowned. "That's impossible."

"They live in a hypothetical world." She replied. "Maybe he will, maybe he won't. It's people like that that can go either way. Friend or enemy. It's a huge red flag. They're very unpredictable and those are people you want to avoid at all costs."

"Have you ever known someone like that?" I asked. Somehow, that interested me. She seemed to debate for a moment while I took another drink.

"Yes." She finally answered. "Aro is like that."

I inhaled so fast, some tea went into my lungs with it. My hand flew to my mouth, covering it before I could spray as I started to cough violently.

I was startled by how forcefully I was reminded of that name, and breathing in a warm liquid really sucked horribly. That forceful reminder went to the back of my mind as the panic kicked in. It wasn't real panic. Only involuntary, instinctive panic that came when something in the body was in distress.

"Are you okay?" Alice asked, patting my back while I choked. I could tell in one glance that Jasper didn't like my reaction. He knew it hadn't been random.

When I recovered enough, I looked over at her. Completely ignoring what had just happened.

"Aro?" I asked, and she stared at me. Not a bit of her expression changed, but I read in her eyes that she didn't like that either. None of them did. Something about me saying his name concerned them.

"Aro." She finally repeated. "He's like that. He's loyal only to himself. His brothers are a very close second. If anyone else believes otherwise, they're fooling themselves."

That gave me a direction to send the explanation for that dream the other night. Especially given their reaction. Whatever discussion we'd been having about the fire was lost.

"Is Aro bad?" I asked pointedly.

"Not if he has no reason to be." Carlisle answered quietly from the side, and I looked over at him.

"Excuse to be, you mean." Emmett scoffed. I looked to him next. "Shorty, you wanna stay as far away from him as you can."

"Why?" I asked nervously.

"Don't answer that." Esme scolded him.

"No." I stood up. "Why?" I felt like this was definitely something I needed to know. He glanced to Esme, and when she didn't protest again, he looked at me.

"If he found out exactly what kind of gift you're developing, he.." He hesitated. "Well, he'd really want to be your friend."

"He'd have to go through me first." Alice grumbled, and I glanced back at her.

"You see the problem." Emmett added, gesturing gently to Alice. "He's been after anyone with your gift for a pretty long time now, but see.. It really wouldn't fly very well if he set his sights on you."

"Set his sights?" I asked. "For what?"

"He would want to use your gift for himself." Alice explained tightly. "From someone that knows all too well, I would stop at nothing to keep you away from him." She hesitated for a moment. "Why do you ask?"

I wasn't really sure, so I took another, more successful drink from my cup.

"He's the one that can read every thought someone's ever had, right?" I asked instead. "Edward told me a little bit about him back before the wedding."

"That's right." Carlisle answered, but I could see he was just as uncomfortable as everyone else. Maybe a bit more so.

"How could he use my gift for himself?"

"If you had a vision, and he took your hand." Alice explained. "There is no privacy when it comes to him." I imagined what it would be like for someone else to know every single thought I'd ever had, and I shuddered a little. Every single thought was quite a lot.

"Why do you ask, Leandra?" Alice pressed. I sighed, and sat back down, setting my cup down.

"I think I dreamed about him." I admitted hesitantly. "Zack said I talked in my sleep the other night, and he asked me who Aro was. I don't remember anything about it. Not even a feeling, but I kinda have to believe him because how else would he know his name?"

"Maybe it's nothing major." Emmett sighed.

"I don't think I've seen anything less than major since I started getting this stupid gift." I replied skeptically.

"Way to squash my optimism, shorty."

"You're welcome." I countered without missing a beat, and he chuckled.

"We'll keep an eye out." Carlisle assured me, and I nodded.

I was still pretty confused, but I accepted that for now. Half a second later, Esme stood up from her chair, turning to look to the stairs. Emmett stood straighter. They were all extremely attentive, which took my full attention.

"What's wrong?" I asked quietly, forcing myself to stand up again. Alice, however, made me sit back down.

"Just stay still." Jasper instructed me. "Try not to move."

Before I could ask what he meant, I spotted Edward first. He was moving slower than I was used to seeing. Until I saw that he was leading Bella into the room.

True to my word, I did exactly as I was told. Sitting as still as I could possibly sit, my eyes on Bella's new appearance. I got to see first hand what being turned did to someone's appearance. It was both amazing and terrifying at the same time.

Her eyes met mine, and though I wanted to move away from the bright crimson of them, all I could do was briefly avert my gaze, and eventually look back up. She attempted a small smile, but I could easily see how tense just being here made her. Edward held her hand in his, rubbing her arm supportively.

I couldn't look away. My heart pounded roughly and I definitely couldn't move, but at the same time, I could tell how terrified she was. The others might have trusted her to pull this off, but she very clearly didn't have nearly that much confidence in herself. The least I could do was stay very still.

I watched as Bella took a careful breath, and though she hid it pretty well, I still saw the wince the action caused her to make. It wasn't her fault, and she was trying, but it was still tense. Edward must have done or said something to gain her attention, because she looked to him and nodded.

Together, they continued on. After they left the room, I finally let out the breath I'd held.

"How amazing was that?" Alice asked, smiling to Esme, "She did so well."

"They both did." Esme smiled, looking to me. All I'd done was not run away, but that must have been a good thing. Then I recalled that they could all hear my heartbeat's reactions, so that explained a lot.

I laid back with a sigh, closing my still tired eyes. That had been enough excitement for one day. Resisting the urge to get as far away from her as possible was difficult. I knew it was Bella, but seeing her that way scared me. Mostly her eyes. The deep crimson color of them, so different from the brown I'd seen before, told me to be afraid and it made me edgy. Even if she'd never actually tasted human blood, according to Carlisle.

Also knowing that someday, I would make that drastic change set my heart sprinting. Would I turn out as beautiful as she was? More importantly, would they even want me? I thought for sure I'd gotten passed that question a long time ago, but seeing Bella like that made it more real to me. It had always been a distant thought, a fleeting expectation, but now I saw first hand what being turned meant.

Now I understood, and for the first time, I was grateful Carlisle had refused when I requested it. I couldn't imagine myself like that when I was that young.

That sight stayed with me all day. No matter what I tried, I couldn't figure it out. Something about seeing her that way really set my skin crawling. I found it weird because it was just Bella.

I was fine with the newborn stranger I'd met in the woods. I wasn't nearly as edgy. I was okay with Laurent. Yeah, I didn't like him, but it wasn't anything like this reaction.

I stayed up as late as I possibly could. I put it off as long as I possibly could, which really should have told me something. It should have told them something, too.

I lay trying to sleep. I felt it, rolling towards me every time I closed my eyes.

I was going to have a bad night. I felt it, and for the weirdest reasons, I was absolutely terrified. It was crushing, and I could barely breathe the closer I came to sleep. It felt like I was begging. It wasn't actually a thought, but the feeling of the desperation of begging and pleading that I'd never once felt before.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, though, it was very busy. Sounds I couldn't quite make out. It was all internal. Every bit of it was internal, but it was pure chaos. Like trying to hear a nearly-muted TV at the opposite end of a very long, hollow hallway.

I'd just started focusing on it, when I was upright.

"Leandra?"

I was pulled roughly out of my mind, only to realize that I was already up. I had been upright and bawling for awhile. My heart was absolutely broken, and I cried loud enough to announce that. It physically tore at me, the absolute devastation.

I held so tight to myself, I ached and I violently trembled.

Alice sat closest to me, her gaze intent on me.

"Breathe." She stressed. I jumped startled at her smoothing my hair, the same movement she'd been doing for however long so far. It was taking it a long minute for everything to catch back up to me.

I was so scared, and so confused.

"Is she finally awake?" Emmett asked back by the door.

"I-I was never asleep!" My voice shook along with me, but that sounded like a huge lie to myself. Tears poured so forcefully down my cheeks, because just under the thousand pounds of pain was another weight I just started to recognize.

I was absolutely furious.

I was completely terrified, absolutely devastated, and murderously furious.

"Focus on your breathing." Alice told me gently, which really helped. "Calm down."

This was the weirdest thing I'd ever been through. As soon as I soothed the fury, the heartbreak caught back up with me, punching me right in the stomach. Tears forcefully and painfully welling in my eyes. My throat knotted up so quickly I gasped, and I choked on a sob.

I didn't understand this amount of emotion. It was beyond anything I'd ever felt before, and the worst part was, I knew there was a story behind these emotions that hadn't even happened yet.

It was the same feeling I felt at the start of everything this summer. It was the feeling I was hoping would be fixed by knowing everything was going to be okay, only it had only gotten worse. A lot worse.

"I'm so scared." I managed to whisper, and I could only hope they heard me.

"Why?" Alice nearly demanded. "Leandra, what was it?" I wasn't stupid. By now I knew her question wasn't just out of curiosity.

"I don't know." My whisper trembled along with me, but I didn't know what else to say. I would have given anything to know the reason behind this feeling, but at the same time, I really didn't want to know what was coming.

If it felt this horrible, I didn't want to know what was going to happen that would make me feel like this.

I crumbled then, leaning forward and burying my face in the blanket draped over my drawn up knees in an effort to keep some dignity. My breathing stopped as I forced my sobs quiet. They tore free hard enough to shake me.

"In here." Alice called, and I looked over in time to see Esme walk in quickly. She must have been out. I choked again, reaching for her before she even got to me. Something I hadn't done since the day she and the others were saving me from Jack.

She gathered me up quickly, holding me as tightly as I held onto her. I was still crushed, even with Jasper standing right there. Behind her, in the doorway, I looked over to spot Carlisle as he arrived.

He wasn't the only one deeply concerned when I released Esme only to cross the room to him. I'd never done that. I'd never given up the safety of Esme's hug just to go to someone else. Not when I was still this upset.

Of course he returned my hug as he crouched down, but that didn't keep him from being concerned. Especially as my tears renewed against his shoulder.

"What happened?" He asked above my sobs.

"She saw something." Alice answered. "She was in it for several minutes, but with Edward not here.."

"Several minutes?" Carlisle asked, surprised.

"She has no recollection of it." Edward's voice approaching wasn't enough to make me let go. I was actually surprised to find that he was right. I couldn't remember anything about it. Apparently, several minutes had passed without my knowledge because I could only recall trying to sleep. There was nothing between trying to sleep and suddenly sitting up with the room bright as day and Alice calling my name.

Esme sighed sadly. "I'm a little bit glad she doesn't remember, because.."

"If it makes her react like that, what could it be?" Alice finished for him, and her sigh told me she was approaching.

I couldn't breathe in. It was physically impossible to let myself, because I knew if I did that, I wouldn't be able to be silent anymore. I was crushed and it was spreading. It was physical, my fists clenched in the fabric of Carlisle's shirt.

I'd never felt this before, and it was scaring me. Never.

"For Pete's sake, just help her." Emmett snapped from the doorway.

"I have to let her feel them." Jasper shook his head. "If I take them from her, it'll be harder for her to identify later. Unfortunately, a reaction this strong means we need to know sooner rather than later."

"Think it could be Aro?" Emmett asked, quieter now.

"What reason would he possibly have?" Alice asked with a frown in her voice. "Last time I checked, he was perfect happy with us."

"For now." Emmett pointed out.

"Whatever it is, we need to be prepared for the worst." Edward wasn't happy either.

"We'll discuss this later." Carlisle spoke firmly. I knew he was only worried about me, because I was listening to them.

I was trying to calm down. Not prepare for the worst.

I hated my gift so much right then. I hated it.

A/N: I'm so sorry this took so long, guys. So much has been going on around here, I don't even know where to begin explaining.
If this chapter is a little mixed up, please forgive me. I wanted to get this out there, because it helps me concentrate on the next when I get a spare second.
THANK YOU to my awesome reviewers! And the new follows. Without you, there'd be no chapter sixteen.
I look forward to reading your thoughts on this one. Again, I apologize if it seems like mostly filler, or too rushed/mixed up. It's been chaotic around here lately.
Until seventeen, guys. :}