Dear Fanfiction Writers

by SideshowJazz1

The characters of Total Drama have been cruising through the archive of stories about them recently, and they're rather...interested in those who write about them. So they're going to do a bit of their own writing - to us, to say what they want written and not written about them! Pretty much a side project written for laughs. R&R!

75. MacArthur's Letter

Dear Fanfiction Writers,

Well, you guys have some pretty wild imaginations. I mean, where did you get the idea that I worked at a convenience store, or as a zookeeper, or a pizza delivery woman? I'm pretty sure I made it clear that I'm still training as a cop.

Apart from that...well, what's up with you guys? Why aren't you writing about us properly? I've seen, like, two stories that me and Sanders are in. Okay, so I guess you write more about me than you write about her, but seriously, you haven't seen her spirit! Ever since we finished the race, she's really shown what she can do. The meek little waif you saw in the race – you better start writing her as a proper strong gal, just like how you write me!

Also, let me work out this so-called headcanon. No, I do not have any contact with the pants-wetter from Total Drama. Just because he has the same last name as me...look, it's a fake name. What part of "My real name is Valentina Escobar" don't you guys get? We are not siblings, he doesn't know I exist and I didn't know he existed until I saw Total Drama on TV.

That's all I wanted to say.

Freeze in the name of the law, slanderers,

MacArthur