The feedback… wow! Thank you so much for your support and kind words. Updating sooner because I love you all.
Thank you Guest who pointed out I forgot to tag Emma/Regina!
Welcome back to the filth!
Regina strutted elegantly back into the conference room.
In fact, very elegantly for someone who was trying to mask the fact that her fingers still felt sticky even though she had applied copious amounts of soap when she washed her hands.
"Where's Emma?" Snow asked with a frown.
"She's not feeling very well," Regina lied. "Can you help me make them scatter?" she pointed at the small crowd still assembled in the room.
"Sure. What's wrong with her?"
"I think she has a small fever. I'm sending her home to get some rest. Can you tell David to take over her shift?"
"Yes, but-"
"I'm not forgetting to add it to his Christmas bonus-"
"It's not about the money."
Regina frowned with polite curiosity.
Snow sighed.
"David and I had plans to cook, remember? Emma's birthday dinner?"
Oh.
Right.
She forgot that there was a major downside about being in love with Emma Swan.
Family dinners.
With Snow White. And Prince Charming.
"I'll tell you what. He just needs to keep his phone close. In case there's an actual emergency."
"Sounds good," Snow smiled. "I hope she gets better. Let me know if you need anything," she waved. "See you later!"
Regina waved, realizing why her fingers felt sticky. She quickly closed her hand and hid it slightly on her side. Dammit, Swan-
She waved goodbye and patted shoulders with the other hand as people started to leave. Not even in hell she would let people notice she had sperm between her middle and ring finger.
Emma only showed up when all the noise faded. Her hair was a mess, her face flushed. She had removed her jacket, and Regina could see the sweat marks on her tank. It looked like she was in pain, limping slightly.
"These pants are killing me," she said awkwardly.
Regina flicked her eyes, noticing the huge bulge on her crotch now that her spell had faded.
"Why did you have to make it so big?"
"I didn't make it!" Emma snarled with an eye roll. "At least not consciously. I don't know how to make one, Regina. That's your department."
The brunette was smirking.
"So edgy…"
"Keep teasing me and you'll see edgy."
The spark of danger in her voice hit Regina's core literally. As hot waves of pleasure rolled down her belly, she felt a second flow of liquid arousal pooling in her underwear. The first was when she entered the bathroom and saw the red rod dangling from Emma's open flyer.
She felt it on her very-expensive-lacy-underwear-for-Emma's-birthday, which she had selected specially to entertain Emma when they were alone after Henry went to the Zimmers for the weekend.
And the very-expensive-lacy-underwear-for-Emma's-birthday was now very-wet-and-very-ruined.
She should have given up her obsession with expensive lingerie long ago.
"Well, it's your birthday, and you clearly deserve a day off, so…"
"Don't you dare poof me home-"
"I have work to do, dear."
"But it's my birthday!" Emma said, sounding again like the brat that she was. "And I have… thingy. It needs attention!"
Regina smirked, approaching her slowly. "Does it, baby?"
"Very much," Emma breathed when the brunette stopped inches away from pressing their bodies flush against each other.
"I can tell," Regina whispered, briefly cupping her bulge with one hand, licking her lips as she did. "Why don't you go home and wait for me in bed?" she purred, running her hand up, pressing both her palms softly against Emma's chest and caressing the taut flesh above her breasts. "Your father will take over for you."
She saw conflict flash past green eyes.
"How long until you get home?" she asked in a hoarse voice, visibly torn between fucking her on the spot or waiting for her in bed for a possibly dirtier reward.
"Not long," Regina smiled, patting her chest with both hands. "I promise."
Emma folded her arms and sighed. "Fine."
"Don't start without me," Regina warned her.
"But-"
"No but. You're not wasting one drop of that on porn stars!" she put a hand on her hip, the other pointed at Emma's crotch.
Emma smirked, her eyes darkening. "Want it all for yourself, Your Majesty?"
Regina felt an impressive trail of goosebumps running from the small of her back to her nape.
"Go home," she hissed, her voice husky and affected. She turned around so that Emma couldn't see her cheeks growing pink. "I see you went back to being insufferably cocky."
The blonde hummed, pleased with herself. "Cockier."
Regina shook her head and flicked her wrist, sending Emma home in a cloud of purple smoke.
XXX
Regina sighed, cursing inwardly.
Why she had agreed to see that insufferable bug was beyond her.
Maybe because it was funny to hear her talk, all wounded and resented with the fact that Regina invited Sister Astrid to the Council and not her.
"There must be a law or decree that stops people from asking for fairy dust for mundane reasons," Blue said. "I told Nova to address that this morning, but it turned out the meeting was a party."
"Yes," Regina grinned a very toothy grin. "Miss Swan's surprise birthday party. Our beloved Sheriff."
"Your beloved-" Blue grunted.
"What was that, Mother Superior?"
"Nothing. I just wanted to make sure this was addressed."
"Well, you just did."
She made a pause. "Do you intend to take action about it?"
"That's what council meetings are for."
"Yes, but-"
Her voice trailed off into the back of Regina's head as her cellphone vibrated inside her drawer. She didn't bother being discreet.
Message from MIGHTY SWAN. When the hell did Emma went through her phone and changed that?
The message said: I AM BORED.
Regina texted her back. STOP CHANGING MY CONTACTS' NAMES!
'IDIOT' IS OFFENSIVE. EVEN WITH THE HEART EMOJI.
SOMEONE HERE HAS A FRAGILE EGO…
I'LL SHOW YOU MY 'FRAGILE EGO', REGINA…
I FORGOT YOUR TURN INTO A NARCISSISTIC PIG WHEN YOU HAVE A PHALUS BETWEEN YOUR LEGS.
STILL CALLING IT BY THE FANCY NAME.
I AM NOT A PEASANT IN HEAT.
YOU DON'T SEEM TO MIND WHEN I FUCK YOU LIKE ONE.
GO FIND SOMETHING USEFUL TO DO. I'M BUSY, Regina added, ignoring Blue's rants as she felt a particular body part throb furiously with the petulance of that imbecile that she chose for a girlfriend.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!
HOW ABOUT START ACTING YOUR OWN AGE THEN?
I'M GONNA WATCH PORN.
DON'T YOU DARE.
THEN COME HOME.
I'M WORKING!
I'M HORNY.
THAT'S NOT MY PROBLEM.
REALLY?
And there was a picture attached to it. A picture she knew she shouldn't open, especially at work.
She clicked to download it. Emma had sent her a close shot of the angry red tip escaping from the elastic band of her grey sweatpants, the outline of the rest still visible through the thin fabric.
Regina let out a low but still audible whimper that made Blue stop talking.
"Is everything alright, Madam Mayor?"
Yes, her ovaries were just exploding, and contorting every fiber of muscle she had from her waist down.
Of course everything was alright.
"Yes," she said, crossing her legs to get some friction. She cleared her throat. "I, um, I understand your concern with fairy dust, the scarcity of it, magic in the hands of moronic buffoons… I get it. I will discuss that on our next council meeting. Is there anything else I can do for you?"
"Um, no," Blue frowned as she stood up, surprised that Regina was not going to put much of a fight only to spite her. "Thank you for your time."
When she closed the door behind her, Regina let out a breath she didn't know she was holding.
She was going to kill Emma.
On her birthday.
XXX
After nagging the hell out of Regina and using her signature - and immature – move by sending Regina a dick pic, Emma was ignored for the rest of the day.
She had paced the mansion four times, back to back. She had counted the flowers on the wallpapers, changed three lamp bulbs, and eaten every leftover on the fridge.
She took two cold showers.
She ran around the block twice.
And then she took another shower.
She dragged her bare feet downstairs, monster properly secure inside large sweatpants. It still felt uncomfortably stiff because she was surrounded by that damn scent that prevailed in the house and was entirely Regina.
"Fuck you for being so hot," she muttered, turning on Henry's videogame.
When she got bored again, Emma dropped the controller and her hand flew to her hardness. She looked at the front door, and then she quickly checked the driveway. She rubbed it tentatively.
"Shit," she hissed when it throbbed and jerked. It got harder than before, and she gave it another stroke. It started to throb painfully, and she cringed. She was going to be murdered if Regina ever found cum on her fancy couch.
And for one awful second she considered putting the blame on their son.
Not that Regina would've believed her, but still… the pig instincts that came with the equipment were savage.
Emma took a deep breath and removed her hand, placing both arms on top of the backrest of the couch. Her hips squirmed; she felt painful knots on her abdomen, coming from both sides of her hips, shooting towards her cock.
Then her phone beeped.
Message from HOTPANTS. God help her if Regina ever found out about this.
I'LL BE HOME IN TEN MINUTES.
Skipping steps, Emma almost literally flew upstairs.
She plopped down on the mattress, like a child ready for birthday gifts.
She pulled her pants down to her knees.
"Let's see if she can resist it now," she said, staring at the wobbling thing. Hell it was fat. She should have bought lube. Did they have lube in the house? Did Regina ever need lube?
She got comfortable against the pillow on the headboard, and rested her head against her hands on the wall. She heard the Benz downstairs.
She held her breath when she heard the heels clicking against the floorboards, and then the soft twist on the doorknob-
Regina entered the room, and her gaze fell upon Emma's face and then on her very very very hard cock. Emma grinned proudly, almost predatorily.
"I really need a shower," Regina said looking away, stepping down of her shoes and zipping down her dress. "Why are you not dressed? We're going to be late!"
Emma blinked in confusion. "Wait. What?"
"Did you forget?" Regina unclasped her bra as she picked a clean towel from a drawer. "Birthday dinner with your parents?"
"Oh no no! We're not going! We're staying! I waited for you all day, Regina! Get your ass over here now!"
"Yes we are going, dear. I'll get my ass over there when I want to."
"Tell them I'm still sick!"
"I already told your mother that you were feeling better."
She groaned, and she growled when she saw the shit-eating grin on Regina's face.
"You are evil," she hissed.
"That's a little harsh," Regina said, still smiling.
"Harsh?" Emma snarled. "Leaving me like that is harsh," she pointed at her frustratingly ready member. "It fucking hurts!"
"Go get dressed. I'll use the cloaking spell on it again."
Emma let out a moan, which Regina ignored, closing the door to the bathroom behind her.
XXX
Regina rested against the door and let out a deep breath. The second her eyes fell upon that pulsing, fat red cock, her legs turned into jelly and she had to hold back a very loud moan. And when Emma was bossy like that…
Oh God help her.
She was throbbing. She was throbbing violently, and she wanted nothing more than to be fucked hard.
But she needed to teach Emma a lesson, and as much as she loved those dirty games, this time she knew it would be hard to keep up.
She took a quick shower, trying to think of unsexy things, like Mr. Gold, or Mary Margaret on her favorite Christmas sweater. It worked for the time being, and it was an actual relief to move her legs without all the pulsing between them.
That was, however, short-lived.
As soon as she walked out of the bathroom, she was greeted by the sight of Emma Swan in a fitting white shirt and white boxers. She always looked great wearing those, with her long legs and toned abs. However, she looked pornographically attractive with that thing tucked underneath the cotton white fabric. It almost didn't fit.
And she could see the outline perfectly.
"Put on some pants," she growled in frustration.
"Or what?"
Regina spun around and narrowed her eyes at Emma. She dropped the towel.
She saw Emma's throat bob up and down. Her jaw dropped, and the thing twitched inside her boxers.
"Keep it under control, or I'll make it disappear and you'll have invisible and permanent blue balls," Regina said.
Emma whined, pressing her erection down with both of her hands. Then she grabbed a pair of jeans and the Oxford loafers Regina gave her and stormed out of the room.
XXX
"Fuck," Emma grunted, trying for the umpteenth time to make room for the thing inside her pants. That was her largest pair, but still it wasn't enough to fit that bulging sausage that she apparently gave herself by accident.
Even with Regina's concealing spell, it would be uncomfortable to sit and walk. And to endure her parents cooing her as if she were ten.
That might actually come in handy.
Nothing was more effective to lose a hard-on than parents treating you like a baby.
That thought helped it soften a little, and she zipped and buttoned her pants quickly before it went rigid again. She tied her shoe laces and went downstairs to cool off.
XXX
Regina chuckled when she entered the kitchen and found Emma with her head shoved inside the fridge.
"Literally trying to chill?" she asked.
Emma grunted, drawing back. Her eyes went wide when she saw Regina's outfit. She was in one of those obscenely tight dresses, wearing carmine high heels. The dress was gray, and the coat she was holding was a shade darker.
"Chill with you around?" Emma scoffed. "I'd need to live in an igloo. Without you."
"Oh, my poor baby…"
That thing about being a turn off to be treated like a baby?
Bullshit.
Emma shamelessly pressed her erection with one hand and grabbed the car keys.
"I'll wait outside before I burst my jeans," she stuttered.
Regina grinned victoriously.