A/N: Some notes and reminders: Angel bought the Crawford Street mansion when the Potentials began showing up in Sunnydale and needed a place to stay. Since Angel never lost his soul and Angelus never moved into the mansion. Joyce never died, and is married to Greg. I always loved the conversation that Spike and Buffy had in this episode, but as a diehard B/A fan, I would have preferred if it was Angel, not Spike :) At this point in the series, Faith is back in Sunnydale. Let's just say that Angel and Wesley were able to pull some strings (connection with Kate?) to spring her out of jail. Also I changed Angel's car to a Mustang because I never really liked his convertable in the show.

Transcript for "Touched" was found here: www. /buffy/transcripts/142_tran. html

I changed around some of the conversation a bit to fit the scene with Angel in it instead of Spike.

Enjoy!

Angel cursed to himself silently as he pulled into the gravel driveway of the Crawford Street mansion. There were already a few cars parked there, meaning he was late. This was an important meeting, and despite everything going on in LA, Buffy needed him in Sunnydale at the moment. She told him it was simply for backup and his input on their newly gathered information about Caleb and the First, that she could handle it, but she wanted him there anyway. Angel had known her long enough to be able to detect something else going on; he could hear it in her voice. It was insecurity. Buffy was the strongest person he knew, but even leaders get uneasy sometimes. He told her he would be there by midnight, even just to stand in the background and look intimidating. He was glad to get a laugh out of her from that.

Angel shut the door to his Mustang and jogged to the front door. The many voices of the Potential Slayers lounging in the main room in front of the fireplace stopped immediately when he entered. He tried to give them a friendly smile, but could smell the spike in their fear immediately. Since he was only in Sunnydale a few weekends here and there, he was simply known as Buffy's "mysterious creature of the night boyfriend". Angel almost burst out laughing when he first overheard a Potential call him that, since he remembers Buffy referring to him in a similar way when she was their age. They were smart girls though. They must know of his past. Angel wondered how his relationship with Buffy affected their view of her. Since his years of being with Buffy, he had been working on not dwelling on such negative thoughts. He shook his head and walked into the kitchen where he could hear Giles, Willow, Xander and Faith were talking. He could tell as soon as he walked into the door that Buffy wasn't in the mansion. Maybe she was out patrolling and he could join her later.

"Hey, sorry I'm late," he said to the group gathered around the large island. All eyes snapped to them, and the tension in the room kicked up a notch. Angel immediately was on edge. "Where's Buffy?"

"Um," Willow answered, fidgeting slightly. "She's not here right now."

"Okay…when's she get back?" Angel asked.

Willow walked towards Angel, looking nervous. "Um, you weren't here, but earlier, we all got together and t-talked out some disagreements that we were having. Um…and eventually, after much discussion, Buffy decided that it would be best for all of us if she took a little time off. A little breather."

Angel stared at his girlfriend's best friend. He looked to Xander and Giles, and then back to Willow. "Uh-huh. Buffy decided…in the middle of the apocalypse, to take some time off," he said, unconvinced.

"Well, we all decided," Xander said.

Angel let out a dark chuckle. "Oh yeah, you all decided," he said, shaking his head. He looked around at the group of people that he had known for the past seven years. People he trusted. People Buffy trusted. "Who do you think you are?" he asked.

Willow stepped up again and said, "We're her friends, we just want-"

Angel felt the anger bubbling up in him and couldn't stop himself from snapping, "You're her friends and you betray her like this?"

"You don't understand-" Giles started to say.

"You know, I think I do," Angel said, interrupting him. "You used to be the big man, didn't you? The teacher, all full of wisdom. Now she's surpassed you, and you can't handle it." Angel had always held Giles with the highest respect, but right now he didn't seem to care. "She has saved your lives again and again. She's died for you, and this is how you thank-"

"Angel," Faith cut in, gently but firmly. "Take it down a notch. We all said our piece. You're just a little late for speech-giving."

In the span of a heartbeat, Angel advanced on Faith and stared down at her. "Finally got what you wanted after all these years, didn't you?" Faith glared up at him, trembling from the effort it took not to fight back.

After a few tense beats Angel said fiercely but quietly, "Where is she?"

"I don't know," Faith responded, not breaking eye contact.

Angel stared at her for a moment, then glanced at Giles and the others before turning and walking out the door.

It took Angel a few blocks to shake off the anger and start to think clearly. He didn't understand. Buffy was the most selfless, caring, determined person he had ever known. He had seen her lead and was left in awe. He knew she was under a lot of pressure and stress from dealing with both the Potentials and the upcoming Apocalypse, but she wasn't one to give up. No, she was pushed out. She gave everyday of her life since she was sixteen for these people. Hell, she died for them. She came back from Heaven and continued to fight for them. Yes, she was forced out. And Angel was pissed.

He finally slowed to a stop a few blocks from the mansion and closed his eyes, inhaling to search for her scent. Finding it, he continued down the street.

Angel followed Buffy's scent across town and was surprised to find himself standing in front of the small basement apartment that he still owned. The one he lived in while Buffy was in high school. The one that held so many significant memories of their relationship. Angel couldn't help but smile a little knowing that she came to this place.

He quietly unlocked the door and stepped into the dim light. Closing the door behind him, he turned and gazed at the sight in front of him.

Buffy was lying on his bed, curled up leaning against the headboard and looking very small. Her eyes were open but she didn't look up at him. Angel shrugged off his coat and draped it over a nearby armchair.

"Hey, there you are," he said quietly. Buffy didn't respond. Angel slowly walked towards her. He couldn't get a read on her emotions at the moment (which scared him slightly), so he didn't know how to begin. "I heard. I was over there. After all we've done for her…" Angel sighed. "I thought she changed. Makes me-"

Buffy cut him off, still not looking at him. "It wasn't just Faith. It was all of them." She finally turned her eyes to Angel and said, "It's not like they were wrong. Please leave."

"No," Angel responded. "I think you're right. Caleb is trying to hide something from you. I think it's at the vineyard you told me about."

Buffy was silent for a moment. "I don't feel very right," she finally said.

Angel walked closer to the bed. "You're not fooling me."

Buffy scoffed. "What do you even mean?" she asked.

"Well, you're not a quitter," Angel responded.

"Watch me."

"You were their leader, and you still are," Angel continued. "This isn't something you gave up, it's something they took."

Buffy looked up at him. "And the difference is?"

"We can take it back," Angel said firmly.

Buffy paused for a moment. "No," she said.

"You mean no as in eventually?" Angel asked.

Buffy sighed, sat up straighter and swung her legs over the edge of the bed. "You really have problems with that word, don't you?"

Angel stepped forward closer. "You can get them back."

"Can, maybe. Should?" she sighed and hung her head, pressing her palms against her eyes. "I'm just so tired."

"They need you," Angel said. He needed her to snap out of this. Not only for him, but for the world. At Buffy's silence he continued, "I mean it's chaos over there without you."

"Really?" Buffy asked.

"Yeah! Yeah, it's uh, there's junk, you know?" Angel said, in an attempt to peak Buffy's interest. "Food cartons, sleeping bags not rolled up. Everyone's very scared and uh, unkempt."

Buffy smirked and rolled her eyes. "Sounds dire."

"I didn't see much," Angel said, sitting on the bed beside Buffy. "I came, yelled at Faith and left."

Buffy turned to him and asked, "Really? I mean, not that I'm glad but-"

"Say the word and she's a footnote in history," Angel cut in. "I'll make it look like a painful accident."

Buffy's smirk dropped. "That's my problem," she said, turning away from him. "I say the word, some girl dies. Every time."

"There's always casualties in war," Angel said softly.

Buffy shook her head. "Casualties. It just sounds so…casual. These are girls that I got killed. I cut myself off from them, all of them. I knew I was gonna lose some of them and I didn't…" Buffy stood up abruptly, and Angel followed her with his eyes.

"You know what? I'm still making excuses," she said, crossing her arms and pacing the space in front of him. "I've always cut myself off. I've always…" Buffy sighed and stopped. "Being the Slayer made me different. But it's my fault I stayed that way. People are always trying to connect to me…and I just slip away."

Angel looked up at her and said firmly, "You know I don't believe that."

"You don't…" Buffy responded. She shook her head and avoided his eyes. "You know that I've been different since I was brought back." Buffy looked around at the décor of the basement apartment. It brought her back to a simpler time. A time when all she worried about was getting home before her mom did. A time when the cool silence of the apartment was her and Angel's sanctuary during his sometimes sporadic weekend visits. "I've been unreachable," Buffy finished.

Angel stood quickly, slightly angry. "You seriously think that?"

Buffy felt tired again. "Please, I don't wanna go over this," she said, sitting back down on the bed.

Angel looked down at her and said, "Oh no, no. Hold on here. I listened to you but now I got something to say."

"Fine. Stage is yours. Cheer me up," Buffy said.

"You're wrong. About it all."

"Thank you. That really helped," Buffy deadpanned.

"I'm not trying to cheer you up," Angel told her.

Buffy threw her hands up and said, "What are you trying to say?"

"I don't know," Angel responded. "I'll know when I'm done saying it. Something pissed me off and I just – 'unreachable.' That's it."

"Fine," Buffy resigned. "I'm reachable. I'm a reach-a-thon. Can I just sleep now?"

Angel was determined. "No. You listen to me," he said, kneeling in front of her. He took her hands in his and kissed her knuckles gently. "I've been alive a bit longer than you and dead a lot longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine, and done things I prefer you didn't. I don't exactly have a reputation for being a thinker. I follow my blood, which sometimes doesn't exactly rush in the direction of my brain. So I've made a lot of mistakes. A lot of wrong calls."

Angel paused, looking Buffy in her eyes. He continued after a beat, "Two-hundred plus years and there's only one thing I've ever been sure of. You."

Buffy looked away and Angel reached up and gently turned her face back towards his. "Hey look at me," he said gently. "I'm not asking you for anything. When I say 'I love you' it's got nothing to do with me." Buffy furrowed her brows and a tear trickled down her face. She was pretty sure this was the most Angel had ever said in one sitting. And it was working.

"I love you for what you are, what you do, how you try," Angel continued, quietly but fiercely. "You've been through more than any girl your age should have to go through. And still…you get up every day and keep fighting. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are." Angel paused again, searching Buffy's eyes, trying to convey to her exactly the strength and depth of his feelings for her.

"You're a hell of a woman," he whispered firmly. "You're the one, Buffy."

"I don't wanna be the one," Buffy murmured.

Angel shrugged. "I don't wanna be this good looking and athletic. We all have crosses to bear." Buffy chucked at that.

"You should get some rest. I'll do a quick patrol and in the morning we can figure out what to do next…if you want," Angel said, standing up and heading towards his jacket draped over the chair.

"Angel?" Buffy asked quietly. He turned and looked at her. He was suddenly transported to a rainy night in January five years ago when she looked so small and scared and innocent sitting on his bed. "Could you stay here?" Angel was quiet for a moment so Buffy continued. "There's nothing out there to patrol for anyway, the town's empty."

Angel suddenly thought of Buffy's family. He couldn't believe he didn't think about it before. "Where's your mom and Greg and Dawn?"

"I sent them to Santa Barbara. Vacation until further notice. They can't be here," she said, sounding very tired.

"Good," Angel said. "That's probably a good idea."

Buffy looked up at Angel, suddenly feeling very young. She felt a rush of gratitude towards him. He was the only one she could let her guard down to. That could get through to her even when she was at her lowest. She needed his strength right now, just as she had so many times over the years.

Buffy scooted up towards the headboard and moved over to give Angel space to lie next to her. He kicked off his shoes and climbed into the bed facing Buffy. She shifted closer to him and wrapped her arm around his middle, burying her face in his shirt and took a deep breath in, feeling comfort in his familiar masculine scent. Angel ran his hand soothingly down her hair and back, lulling her into sleep. He pressed his lips against the crown of her head, as a thought came to him.

He lifted his head slightly and looked around the apartment. "Why'd you come here?" he asked quietly, before she could fall fully asleep. Even though Angel no longer resided in Sunnydale, he still owned the small apartment. With Xander, Anya, and Oz so often hanging around Buffy and Willow's apartment, and the dozen or so Potential slayers constantly crowding Buffy, the couple sometimes retreated to Angel's old place for some peace and quiet when he was visiting. Sometimes it was only a few hours they could spare, but they didn't care. Angel wondered why Buffy came here, when her mother's house was currently empty, and her own bed wasn't too far.

"Hmm?" Buffy asked sleepily. "Oh, I don't know, I just kinda found myself here. I feel…safe here, I guess."

"You do?" Angel asked.

"Yeah," Buffy looked up at him. "There's good memories here," she said with a smirk. "I feel loved, and reassured here. Even when things are at their worst, I know we're gonna be okay."

Angel smiled at her and kissed her forehead again. Buffy closed her eyes and snuggled back into his chest. "Yeah, they we will be," he said.

Rationally, he knew there was no way he could be sure of their safety. Realistically, he knew this was the worst they've ever faced. Chances were low they were going to make it out unscathed. But the familiar, comforting surroundings of this place, with Buffy in his arms, her scent surrounding him…he could almost convince himself that everything was going to work out.