Quote # 11 "My biological clock is ticking!" My Cousin Vinny (1992)

"My biological clock is ticking!" Lee whined to Billy as they walked along the reflecting pool on a cool, cloudy day.

Billy stopped short, "Scarecrow, did you just say your biological clock is…ticking?" He blinked several times, trying to wrap his brain around what Lee was trying to tell him.

"Yeah! My biological clock. You know, tick, tick, tick. I'm not getting any younger," Lee groaned. He slumped onto a nearby bench and dropped his head in his hands. Billy slowly sat beside him, unsure what he should say. Lee dragged his hands down his face as he straightened up to a sitting position. "I just don't know what else to do. I mean, we've been trying for months now and nothing," he cried.

Billy lifted his hand to pat Lee's leg to reassure him, but Lee quickly stood up. "Lee, you have to just give it time. It's one of those things. When it's meant to happen, it will happen," he sighed.

"Billy, you don't think..." Lee started, then stopped and sat down again and whispered, "You don't think something could be..." Lee's voice trailed off.

"With what? Just say it, man?" Billy snapped.

Lee sighed, looked around and leaned closer to Billy as he whispered, "You don't think something's not working right, do you?"

Billy narrowed his eyes at his friend, "Like what?"

Lee looked around again and looked down at his lap before whispering, "With me. I mean, Amanda's already got two kids so we know she can get pregnant. So, what if it's me? I've been exposed to how many chemicals and drugs over the past ten years. Who knows what kind of damage that could have done down there?"

Billy chuckled then quickly coughed to cover it. "I think you need to stop worrying about this. What does Amanda say?"

Lee shook his head, "That's just it, she hasn't said anything."

"Nothing? That doesn't sound like Amanda," Billy scowled.

"Well, she just tells me we have to be patient and keep trying," Lee admitted.

Billy looked watched as a young couple strolled past them before he said, "Well, maybe you're going about it the wrong way."

"The wrong way? Billy, I'm not sure of any other way to do it," Lee replied.

"I don't mean that," Billy shook his head. "I mean, maybe you need to not think about it so much. You know, have a quiet night, just the two of you. Some dinner, dancing, the whole romantic shebang."

"I don't think one night is going to make everything right, Billy. We've tried every other day, every day, only once every three days, in the morning, at night," Lee rambled.

Billy put his hand up to stop him and asked, "So, how are you getting any work done if that's all you've been working on?"

Lee laughed at how absurd his ramble must have sounded. He shook his head then said, "It sounds crazy, doesn't it?"

"No, Lee, it doesn't sound crazy at all. You sound like you are a man, who loves his wife very much and you are desperate to start a family together," Billy assured him.

Lee looked at his friend and said, "Thanks for listening, Billy."

"Well, I think I can do one better than listen. Starting tomorrow you and Amanda are on a two-week administrative paid leave," Billy decided.

"Billy, two weeks? Why?" Lee questioned.

"Because during those two weeks, you and Amanda are going to be spending time away from everyone and everything," Billy declared.

Lee shook his head, "Amanda and I can't just take off for two weeks with no explanation to her mother and the boys."

Billy stood, patted Lee's shoulder and said, "You let me take care of that part. Call it a belated wedding gift or better yet, your one-year anniversary is coming up, call it an anniversary gift."

"Thank you," Lee stuck out his hand for Billy to shake.

Billy pumped his hand several times then said, "And I have the perfect place for you two to go. Crump is in Egypt for the next month and I have the keys to his cabin. As I recall, the last time he gave you the keys, you couldn't take advantage of it, so, now it's my turn."

"Crump's cabin? You think that will do it the trick?" Lee's eyes widened at the thought.

"Fresh air, the mountains, no phones ringing, no computers spitting out information left and right. Yeah, I think Crump's cabin might just do the trick," Billy put his arm around Lee's shoulders and started walking toward the end of the reflecting pool.

Lee gave his head one sharp shake and stated, "Well, if it does happen, we'll be sure to name the baby after you."