Y'all ain't even ready for this.

A quick note: I often listen to certain music to help me with the mood of a chapter, so if you wanna know where my head-space was at, listen to "This Is My Choice" by Alan Silvestri. It's from the first Captain America movie.

Enjoy!

If there was one conclusion Katie Holt had come to lately, it's that she was in love with none other than James Griffin, the most handsome, sweet, encouraging, and funny person (yes, she found his puns funny, don't let him in on that) she'd ever met.

The only problem was, she had no idea how to tell him.

It was ridiculous, of course. They told each other practically everything, and neither of them were shy about their affections for one another. But something about it, the words "I love you," scared her. She was so terrified that he wouldn't feel the same, even though all data pointed to the fact that he most likely did.

Worse, she'd nearly slipped several times in the past week, and now she was on constant alert to make sure the words didn't tumble out. Which, of course, was difficult when he'd hold her close, gaze at her gently with those beautiful brown eyes, or kiss her cheek goodnight like he'd taken to doing (and it still gave her butterflies every time he did so).

Katie sighed, placing a hand over her swelling heart. She could still remember the exact moment she realized it.

Shiro was scrambling after her, calling, "Pidge! Stop running! He's in intensive care! You won't be allowed in!"

"No!" she shouted. "I have to see him!"

Katie rounded the corner, not breaking stride for a second. James— her James— had been hurt on mission. And no one was going to stop her from seeing him.

Tears stung her eyes. All she could imagine was James lying on the bed, unconscious, in pain, and without her by his side. She ran even faster.

Skidding around the final corner, she immediately saw the MFE's staring through a window. She forced her way to the front. Her heart broke instantly.

James was sitting halfway up on the hospital bed, his teeth gritted in pain as the doctors cleaned the wound on his side. His skin was charred where the laser had grazed him, a gruesome mix of black, purple, and red.

Her hands came up to the glass of their own volition.

The motion must have alerted him to her presence. James met her eyes and put on a brave smile. He glanced down at the wound, then waved casually.

Katie felt a sob trying to escape her throat. She could barely see due to the tears in her eyes, but when she noticed the bright red blood on the doctor's gloves, her hands balled up into fists.

James tilted his head, eyes going soft. "I'm okay," he mouthed.

"You idiot," she mouthed back. He laughed, but it was quickly followed by a sharp hiss of pain. One of her tears spilled over. She had never felt more useless in her entire life.

The stampede of the Paladin's footsteps finally caught up, and she heard their breathless panting as they gathered behind her trying to get a look for themselves.

"Geez," Lance muttered. "I'm amazed he made it out with just that."

Keith jabbed Lance's side. "Not helping."

The doctors brought out a needle to sedate him, and Katie let out a shaky breath. She couldn't stand watching, but she couldn't look away. That was her James, her lovely, sweet, handsome, brave James lying in there, and there was nothing she could do to help him.

A heavy hand landed on her shoulder, and Katie looked up to see Kinkade's calm expression. "He'll be fine, Pidge. I know it. He's gotten through worse."

"Yeah," Rizavi agreed, bending down and giving Katie a wink, "You shoulda seen him before you two were dating! I think you've made him more cautious than ever!"

"That statement is statistically accurate," Leifsdottir agreed. "He will return to his normal health as always, just like Kinkade said."

Katie's eyes trailed back to James, taking in his now serene sedated face. She could feel her heart, her very quintessence reaching out toward him. Finally, she whispered, "He'd better, or I'll kill him."

The Paladins and MFE's shared a chuckle.

Even now, her heart ached thinking about it.

The wait for the surgery to finish up had felt like decaphoebs, and when they'd finally let her in, she'd started crying the second he'd faintly breathed her name.

That was when she knew.

Katie sighed and rolled over in bed. That had been several weeks ago. Maybe she'd get up the courage to tell him soon, but it was still all so new to her. What if it was too early? How did she know if it was the right moment? Was it normal to be so head over heels for someone so quickly?

She didn't have the answers, and that worried her more than anything.

Resignedly, she got up from bed and walked over to the window. She pushed the button for the blinds to open, and to her complete surprise, there was no early morning desert sunshine. Instead, there was an ugly mix of grey skies, dark clouds, and pouring rain. Huh, she really needed to make a habit of checking the forecast more often.

With a shrug, Katie went about getting ready for the day. Today was her mandatory day off, the one that Keith and Shiro literally had to sit down and have a serious talk with her about to make sure she actually took it. Seems her extended hours on the log had everyone worried lately, even though she wasn't sure why. She knew her limits— heck, James probably knew her limits just as well by now.

But regardless of what either of them had to say, the new rules about mandatory vacations had been enforced a month ago, and she'd put it off this long. She just had no idea what to do with herself all day, especially since—

A knock startled her from her thoughts.

"Coming!" Katie shouted. She checked the mirror, deemed that she looked at least somewhat socially acceptable (thank goodness she'd already brushed her teeth), then made her way out of the bathroom and to the door.

She opened it, only to find her boyfriend grinning ear to ear.

"Good morning!" he greeted.

Katie raised an eyebrow. "Morning," she replied slowly. Something wasn't right here…wait— "I thought you had flight tests all day today?"

The light in his eyes began to glow even more. "True, but the rain makes for low visibility," he explained, coming forward and tangling his fingers with hers. "Which means that I had nothing else on my schedule, and by default get the day off!" He finished his proclamation with a quick kiss to her nose.

"Oh no, whatever are you going to do with yourself for a whole day?" she teased.

"Mmmm, I don't know," he sighed dramatically. "I was hoping to spend it with someone special, but I don't wanna be a bother."

Shaking her head, Katie leaned up and pressed a kiss of her own to his cheek. "Silly, you knew how much I was going to miss you today," she said. She tugged on his hands to follow her back into her room, and he followed. Katie headed for the bathroom, desperately needing to run a brush through her hair before she went anywhere. She looked back in the mirror to see that James had settled himself on the edge of her bed.

"So what did you have in mind?" Katie called.

He shrugged. "Snuggling."

A blush rushed to her cheeks, but she finished brushing her hair. "Besides that?"

The sound of her boyfriend chuckling reached her ears. "I have no idea. What were your plans for the day?"

Katie hummed in thought as she walked back over toward him. When she stopped in front of him, he took her hands and pressed gentle kisses to each one, making her smile before she finally replied, "Honestly, not much. Although I am making cookies with my mom in an hour."

James nodded. "So, breakfast together, and then I'll see you after you visit with your mom?"

She shook her head. "I never said you couldn't join us, James."

A bit of guilt entered his eyes. "I know, but…it's…that's supposed to be just you and her. I don't want to intrude."

"You're not intruding if I invite you," she told him. He still looked hesitant, and she leaned forward to press a kiss to his forehead. "Please come, James. I—"

I love you.

She paused before the words slipped out. "—I think that my mom would like it, too. She's been asking about getting to know you better."

His warm hands came up to cup her face, and she felt herself melt when deep brown eyes met hers.

"Only if you're sure," he whispered.

His voice had lowered, and it was soft, so incredibly soft. A flash of heat went through her, and she wondered if it was her imagination that they both seemed to be drawn closer together like magnets.

But she still worried that he didn't feel welcomed, so she broke the moment to respond by nodding seriously. "I'm sure, James."

He nodded back, then smiled and stood up. "Shall we go to breakfast?" he asked, offering his arm.

"We shall!" she giggled. She looped her arm through his without hesitation.

The couple walked down the halls in contented silence, but all Katie could think about was what had just happened. They'd been having more of those moments, recently. The times where they'd go still, get lost in each other's eyes, and be held frozen in a magical world where all they could feel was warmth and happiness.

Those were the times when it was hardest to not tell him, because the words always wanted to tumble out so bad, but she couldn't bring herself to let them.

'Soon,' she promised herself.

They walked through the sliding doors to the cafeteria, and it didn't take long before there were calls from their usual table. The couple waved back, made their way through the line, then walked over to sit down with their friends.

"We got soooo lucky today," Nadia grinned. "There was no way I was gonna last longer than three hours training those newbies."

"My bet was two," Kinkade said.

"One at maximum," Ina corrected.

Shiro shook his head fondly at the group of young adults. "I think you still need to learn an important lesson when dealing with the new cadets. Patience—"

"—yields focus," the entirety of Team Voltron droned, and everyone laughed.

"You taking the day off, Pidge?" Keith inquired.

Katie rolled her eyes. "I think you guys would lock me in my room if I didn't."

Hunk shrugged, "Hey, you've earned it. I can't wait until my next day off— sometimes it's good to let your mind take a break."

"Yeah!" Lance agreed wholeheartedly. "Just don't think for a day!"

"I can't imagine what that's like," Katie snorted, and she caught James' amused smile out of the corner of her eyes.

Nadia took a bite off her food before she pointed her fork at James. "What're you gonna do? Bury your nose in paperwork?"

Katie snickered, and James rolled his eyes. "Actually, I have much more important things to spend my time on," he said, leaning over and unashamedly kissing her on the cheek.

Their group of friends gagged, and the couple laughed.

"We're making cookies with my mom in a bit, though," Katie added on.

"Ooooh," Nadia said, waggling her eyebrows. "Sounds stressful!"

Shiro shook his head. "Mrs. Holt is the nicest person in the world."

"I'm not sure the former Admiral would have agreed," Ina intoned.

"Well, Matt and Pidge had to get their spunk from somewhere!" Hunk claimed.

Lance hummed wisely. "Brains from science dad, fury from terrifying mom."

Katie was quick to summon her bayard and hold it up, letting the crackle of electricity put Lance back in his place. The group chuckled at her unspoken threat.

Breakfast was a quick affair, and though conversation continued to flow easily, she could tell that James was uncommonly stiff. Occasionally Katie would reach over with her foot and nudge him, and that always worked to get him out of his daze. Still, she knew why. Anything that involved her parents made him incredibly anxious. She halfway wondered if it would always be like that, then blushed when she noticed she'd thought the word "always."

…and then she blushed even more when she realized that the concept of always with James didn't sound bad in the slightest.

"So James, have you ever baked before?"

Katie had to stop herself from laughing at the panicked look in her boyfriend's eyes.

"I mean…does box mix with my mom when I was twelve count?" he queried, rubbing the back of his neck.

Her mom tutted. "It'll do." She walked toward the oven, pushing a few buttons to turn it on. "We're making peanut butter cookies, and I don't think they'll be too difficult."

"They're my favorites," Katie supplied.

Her mom was quick to turn around and give James a wink. "Which means you need to pay extra close attention to the recipe so you'll remember it!"

Katie wanted to burst out laughing when James nodded seriously. "Will do, ma'am."

The mother and daughter's eyes met, and Katie snickered at the look her mom was giving her. She definitely approved.

"Step one," her mom clapped her hands, "Gather all the ingredients!"

Within a few minutes, the trio had almost everything spread out of the counter. All they needed was the flour, but that was on a high shelf. Katie stood on her tip toes, reaching in vain for the bag. Just before she could climb up onto the counter, a hand reached over her head and grabbed it for her.

"Need help?" her boyfriend teased.

She stuck her tongue out. "I could've gotten it."

"Mmhm, sure."

There was a chuckle, and the couple turned to see Katie's mother smothering a laugh with her hand. "Ah, the benefits of having a tall boyfriend," she said fondly.

Katie didn't need to look up to know that James was blushing. To be fair, she was, too.

The process of baking the cookies went on as such— her mother giving instructions, James dutifully obeying them down to the letter, and Katie staring at him adoringly as he did. There was something about seeing him interact with her mom that made her so incredibly proud, almost like she wanted to say, "Look! I knew I got a good one!"

Then, there was one moment in particular that she knew would stay in her mind forever. James had finished rolling out the final ball of cookie dough, and when he said he was done, her mom had stepped up and placed her hand on his arm in a show of gratitude.

Katie didn't miss the way his eyes flashed with past pain, only to quickly soften.

She wondered what was going through his head. She wondered if her family would come to accept him as one of their own, and he in return. Ever since he'd told her what happened to his parents, she was plagued by the thought of how lonely he must feel. Both of his parents had been only children, and he'd had no siblings.

Watching him now, his eyes widening in joy as he bit into his first cookie and thanking her mother profusely for letting him help, she knew she wanted to do everything she could to fill that hole in his heart.

No, she knew she couldn't replace what he'd lost. She only hoped that her love was enough to help ease the pain.

If only she could tell him.

A familiar knock sounded at her door, and Katie giggled. "You know it's unlocked, silly!" she called.

Her back was to the door when it opened. She was fiddling with the cables connected to the Mercury Gameflux Two. James had inquired about it earlier, having almost tripped over where it was sticking out from under her bed. It had been ages since she'd pulled it out, and now she was tangled in a mess of the wires she'd jerry-rigged to get it to work on the Castle Ship.

There was a beep, and the machine came to life.

"Aha!" she shouted, smiling widely. She turned around to give him a controller—

Her entire body froze.

James was walking over, a newly acquired blanket from her bed in his hands. He had on a light grey t-shirt, flannel pajama pants, and his hair was slightly ruffled.

That wasn't what made her stare, though.

"What?" her boyfriend asked, his head tilted curiously.

It occurred to her that she hadn't said anything for almost a minute now, but she still couldn't find the words.

James sat down next to her. The concern in his eyes was clear as day. "Katie? You said we were playing video games, right? Is the system not working?"

"I-I, ah…" she stuttered. "Y-Yeah, we are, I just, um…you…?" She lifted a finger to point at his face.

Realization lit up his brown eyes. "Oh! My— yeah, I only wear them when I play," he said, pushing his glasses further up his nose in a way that was far more endearing than it should've been. "My eyes get tired with all the light from the screen."

Katie finally snapped out of her daze. "Wait, do you…do you wear contacts?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "Guess I just kinda forgot to tell you," he laughed shyly.

She nodded back, but she still just couldn't stop staring. Was the tension in the room thick, or was it just her? All she knew was that James looked way too attractive in glasses, and it was doing things to her that she'd never experienced before.

"Katie, are you okay?"

James' brow was furrowed, and before she could stop herself, she blurted, "You look really good with glasses."

He blinked. "I-I…thank you."

Her cheeks were burning. "You're welcome."

Gosh, she felt so embarrassed, but she couldn't bring herself to feel bad about it. She'd always known he was handsome— she had eyes, after all. But there was something about seeing him then, looking like he was about to go to sleep (she tried to not insert "with me" in her head), that made her fall into a spell.

Quiznak she loved him so much, and she wanted to tell him so bad.

It seemed that she wasn't the only one in a daze, because James' eyes had that look that always made her heart melt into a gooey mess. Wordlessly, he pulled her into his lap, wrapping her tight in his arms. Katie snuggled into him, sighing contentedly. What was it about everything about him that was just so utterly perfect?

They cuddled in blissful silence for several minutes. At some point, one of James' hands began to rub gentle circles into her back. The ministrations nearly made her fall asleep, but he spoke before she could.

"How are your nightmares lately?"

Ah. So that's what he'd been thinking about. The question didn't surprise her. Only a couple weeks ago had she confessed her struggles with PTSD, and ever since, he'd been sure to check up on her often. He was never pushy, never pressured her to speak more than she felt like about it. And most times, she only gave the minimum information necessary. But the fact that he knew, the fact that he cared, meant more than she could ever say.

Katie hummed. "Better. They're not as often anymore."

He let out a soft breath. "That's good."

They fell quiet again. She half-wondered if he would ask anything more, but she knew he wouldn't. For some reason, that made her want to talk about it. She knew she could trust him. He wouldn't pry.

Katie shifted in his arms, situating herself so she could look at him better. "They used to be a lot about Matt and Dad…those went away a few months ago after everything was finally over," she told him. "Then after that, as I grew closer to the team, it was about them. They'd…die, and it'd be my fault, or I-I didn't act fast enough, and I f-failed, or…"

Tears were stinging her eyes. Katie took in a deep breath to calm herself. She vaguely registered the fact that James' hands had moved to her arms, rubbing up and down comfortingly.

"You don't have to continue," he murmured. "If it hurts too much—"

She shook her head. "No, I want to tell you." After another shaky breath, she closed her eyes. "Lately they've been about you. After…after the mission."

"No," he whispered. Katie opened her eyes at the exact moment he cupped her face. "Katie, I'm…I'm so sorry."

She swallowed thickly. "James, it's not your fault. It's just what happens."

Her eyes flickered down to the hemline of his shirt. One of her hands began to reach, but she paused, looking back up to ask permission. James nodded. Slowly, she slipped her hand under his shirt, finding the spot on his side that she now knew by heart.

This had been the one exception made in their typically slow-paced, highly-modest relationship. After the mission, the doctors had said it would take time for the marred skin to fully heal. Dragging her fingers along the familiar puckered lines, she knew that they had gotten better, slowly but surely. It used to be a mottled mess of rigid scar tissue and scrapes. She remembered how she'd started crying the first time he'd let her do this.

But still…

Katie glanced up. "Does it still hurt?"

James looked ready to nod, but at that moment, her hand drifted over one of the more sensitive areas of the wound.

He winced. "Yeah, totally fine," he lied.

She gave him a half-glare. "James—"

"It's better than it was," he amended. Katie accepted this answer, and he looked relieved. When she removed her hand, he was quick to take it and press a gentle kiss to her palm. "I'll be fine, I promise."

She nodded, but a contemplative frown came onto her face. "War leaves a lot of scars," she muttered.

"It does," he agreed softly. "But they heal, with time." His hand came up to give her head a meaningful touch. "Yours will heal, too. I know it. You're one of the strongest people I've ever met."

And there they were again, wonderfully trapped in another one of these moments. Katie felt his eyes drawing her in like a black hole, one she wouldn't mind succumbing to. She had no idea where this moment would lead, but she didn't care. All she knew was she couldn't take her eyes off him.

By the looks of it, James felt the same way. His gaze was adoring, half-lidded, with a tiny spark in them that she hadn't yet identified. Their faces were inches away now, and he let out a shuddering breath. Katie closed her eyes at the sensation of his breath hitting her lips. They were so close…

Then suddenly, she felt him jolt. Her eyes fluttered open. James had backed up, his eyes wide, and his mouth open to speak. She tilted her head, but it seemed nothing would come out of him.

Finally, he cleared throat, stammering, "K-Katie, there's, um, something I wanted to say."

She blinked. "Of course, what is it?"

"I, ah…" he swallowed. "Well, it's something I wanted to say for a while, and…I didn't know if it was the right time, or if it was too soon, but…" His eyes met hers, and her heart skipped a beat. "I love you. I really do. And…I don't want you to feel like you have to say it back, because well, um, because I was interested in you before you were interested in me, and I don't want you to feel pressured—"

Without a second thought, Katie pressed her lips to his cheek. She stayed longer than usual, feeling him freeze under her, then reluctantly let her lips leave his skin so she could stare into his beautiful brown eyes again.

"I love you too," she laughed breathlessly. "I love you a lot, and I've wanted to tell you for weeks now, but I was too scared."

James gaped at her, but gradually, he relaxed. He took her face in his hands, leaning down and letting his lips lightly brush over her forehead. "I was scared, too," he murmured. Then, he chuckled. "Actually, I was terrified. I've never loved anyone like this before."

One of Katie's hands lifted to caress his cheek. "Me neither," she confessed shyly. "I…I just didn't know when or how to tell you."

A little smile came onto his lips. "It's okay," he assured her. "When…when did you know?"

A blush lit her face. "Someone's nosy," she teased.

"Just curious," he hummed, pulling her closer and nuzzling his nose in her hair. "I knew when I got hurt on mission." James pulled back so he could look into her eyes. "All I could think about was getting back to you."

Her eyes widened. "That's when I knew too," she admitted. "I'd never been more scared in my life, and even though I knew it wasn't that bad, the idea of not having you…it just—"

"It's unimaginable," he finished for her. She nodded. James moved one of his hands from her face to her back, stroking there soothingly. "I'm still so sorry for scaring you like that."

Katie was about to say, "it's okay," but then she smiled when a different thought hit her.

"At least it lead to something better," she decided. "Otherwise, we would've kept beating around the bush forever. We're kinda good at that."

James chuckled, and was she imagining things, or did his eyes flicker toward her lips?

"You do have a point," he grinned. His eyes gazed deeply into hers. "I love you, Katie."

Her heart swelled, and knowing that she had to be wearing what she knew was the sappiest smile ever seen, she replied, "I love you, too, James."

The pair shared an embarrassed laugh before they fell into their previous trance. James loved her…he loved her. Katie felt like she could die happy now.

After a few minutes in their blissful state, James' eyes moved to look behind her. "So…do you still wanna play that game you told me about?"

Grinning, Katie shifted so she could bury herself in his chest. "Mm, it can wait," she decided.

A kiss to the top of her head told her he agreed.

Confession: I now ship this more than Plance, but can you blame me? They're so cute!

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