Living A Lie Chapter 2

Warnings: Nothing really. Just some mild angst and too much explaining without enough dialogue.

Note: This two-shot takes place about a year after Percy's argument with his family, somewhere at the beginning of 1995. Parkinson is in Azkaban for some reason, so Percy makes up with his family. I'm assuming the events will be mostly the same. Also, I have changed Part 1 slightly, so you may want to check that out first, before reading this.

Special thanks to Myra 109, Guest, chemical violets, and Dawnbreak55 for reviewing! Thanks also to ChoiAnnin, Dawnbreak55, Myra 109, chemical violets, derpywriterlovessupernatural, redbuttrfly, Casandra Piscis, and HoneyApplePie for favouriting and/or following this story.

Sorry this is so late! I was planning on integrating Living a Lie with my personal head canon, but then decided that it didn't really fit in. So I decided to add Part 2! And then I had to redo most of Part 2 because it was terrible.

Disclaimer: I own nothing (sad emoji)

**Molly POV**

Molly stared in shock at Percy's retreating back. Why would he say that? She thought, He knows we love him.

As the shock gradually wore off, she raced up the stairs, determined to find out why Percy thought that way of his family. Everyone else, startled out of their stupor, followed her. Molly's thoughts continued. He should have known that the whole family loved him. They were Weasley's after all. Weasley's valued love, family and loyalty above all else. Then a tiny worm of doubt penetrated her mind, as she recalled countless insults hurled carelessly at Percy by the twins, Ron and Ginny, and all the pranks. With these thoughts in mind, she threw open the door.

**Percy POV**

Percy looked up as his door was thrown open. A part of him wanted to run away now, before anyone could talk.

He would apparate away for a safe amount of time, and then come back after everyone had calmed down and explain then. Or just not come back. But looking at his mother's distraught face, he knew he wouldn't be able to do that. Not again. Not after that stupid argument he had had with his father about his job.

His mother had been too kind to him, he couldn't let her be so upset about this. Even though she had never stopped the insults, the pranks, even though she had been the one to instil his obsessive rule following behaviour by telling him, during the First Wizarding War, that he and his brothers would be killed if he didn't follow the rules, he couldn't bring himself to cause her hurt.

Tears sparkled in Molly's eyes. "Percy..." she started.

Percy interrupted. "I'm sorry, Mum. I should never have said that. It was cruel and I wasn't thinking. I would never think that. I know how much you love me," he said, inserting slight emphasis on certain words to ensure that he sounded sincere.

Molly shook her head. For some strange reason, she had decided not to let this incident go by.

"No. I'm sorry. I've never shown you much attention or love. I suppose because you were so quiet and easy to manage that I never thought or you. The other children, they were always so noisy and rowdy, and demanded my attention, and your father was busy working, and we ignored you. I'm sorry, Percy."

Percy blinked. That was … unexpected. He had thought his mother would accept the apology and forget the incident. Apparently not.

"Mum, it's not your fault. It's no one's fault but my own."

"Got that right," Fred muttered. Even after Percy had apologized, Fred had been very upset with his older brother.

George put his hand on Fred's shoulder. "Easy, Forge. "

Percy sighed. "Look, Mum. I really don't mind that you left me mostly alone. In fact, I'm actually quite happy that you did. It gave me more time to think."

It was true, mostly anyway. He was happy that they left him alone because that meant that they wouldn't notice how often he would be gone. That meant that they wouldn't find out about his deal, because if they did, they would try to stop him and end up dead. However, that didn't mean he wasn't hurt when they ignored him or made him the subject of their pranks and jokes.

Molly shook her head violently. "That's not an excuse! I am your mother, I should notice you! I should have given you the same amount of care and time as I did for your siblings! I should have realized that you left because we hurt you! I know you could never really fit in, but I did nothing to try and help you! I should have… I should have…"

Percy cut in. "Look Mum, it doesn't matter. What happened happened, and there's no way to change it now. I know that you feel guilty, but please, don't tear yourself up over this. It never helps. And I wouldn't want you to feel that way because of me."

"Oh yeah?" That was Fred. "You don't want her to be hurt by you? Then why the hell did you send your Christmas jumper back? Huh? You knew how upset she would be because of that! So why did you do it?"

Percy's eyes flashed in anger for a moment, before he reigned in his emotions and his eyes became cold. "I said I wouldn't want her hurt. I never said I wouldn't hurt her."

"There's no difference!"

"Yes there is! The difference is the feeling you get when you do it! Sometimes you don't want to do something, but you have to!"

"So what? You couldn't possibly have a reason for hurting Mum so badly!"

Molly broke in, distraught. "Please boys, don't argue. Percy's back now, don't chase him away again."

Fred scowled, but left Percy alone. Clearly he didn't want his mother hurt anymore.

"Hermione has a point though. Why can't Percy be a little nicer to us all?" Ron sounded a bit resentful.

Percy sighed inwardly. He had been making an enormous effort to be nice to his family, but years of lying to them and trying to make them hate him was hard to undo. That was what had formulated his reply to Hermione's innocent question. However, the rest of the family obviously couldn't understand that. He couldn't blame them, really. But the nightmares had started up again, and he was losing a lot of sleep; hence his lack of control. And the increasing amount of time when he zoned out (which would never have happened if he was sleeping properly). Dreamless sleep potions could only be taken so often.

Thankfully, Molly decided to intervene. "Never mind about that. It's tea time. Percy, we can talk then, ok? Good, now downstairs, everyone."

Percy supressed a smile, knowing that Ron and Fred would not take kindly to it.

He knew that relationships had been damaged, but he also knew that they could work through their problems together, and find a solution. He knew his mother at least loved him, and he knew that he would always love her. He knew that he would never tell them about his deal with Parkinson, even if he wanted to, because that would cause Molly so much pain.

He knew that he would do everything in his power to put away the Death Eaters for good, to save their children, his siblings in everything but blood.

He knew that he would always be scarred, that nothing would change that. So he would not try to ignore it, to lock away an integral part of him. His experience changed him irrevocably, and he would not have it be any way else. His deal with Parkinson had influenced life after the age of 9.

It had taught him about sacrifice and love, good and evil. He had learned to not judge people based on what they showed the world, but based on what they showed their best friends. He had learned how to wear a mask, how to read people, how to lie. He had gotten a good job, a job that he would never have pushed himself to get if he hadn't made that deal.

It had taught him that there was no such thing as black and white, just a million shades of grey. That not even Dumbledore was all good, that not even Voldemort was all evil. It had showed him the evil of the world, the evil of man, the evil that everyone wanted to deny existed. And he was all the wiser for it.

Author's Note: Alright, so I'm not really sure what happened here, and I think the ending could have been better, and maybe I should have written about what the Weasley's talked about over tea, but I felt like I should get this out. I mean really, it's been over 6 months! The only excuses I can give is that the computer I was working on had to be reformatted, and we've been travelling like crazy. Part of the reason I don't like being homeschooled: If you are in a public school, you don't travel as much. And I spent about 4 months trying to get this to fit in with another story I want to write, but it really didn't work out. So, yeah. Thanks again to everyone who reviewed, if you hadn't, this wouldn't have been out for a long time.