I'll Still be Loving You

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Thisis my AU version SEQUEL to Dinner Date, Please read that before starting this. This story picks up without any time lapse and continues with Kate and Rick as they forge ahead as a Couple and concludes the story arc started when Rick left suddenly.

I don't own Castle; I use the characters for amusement purposes only

Chapter 5

Previously

"Well when I would get to the end of my rope and think that the dream of ever being with you, I would look at this, and remember for one moment in time, you cared just a little. You probably don't remember bu*"

"I smoothed your coat, and told you to be careful in front of Will, then had to be a smart ass and finish it by saying mess this up and I'll shoot you." She tears as she looks like she is recalling the very moment,

"I knew you cared or hoped you did just a little. I knew by the end of the case that the ship with Sorenson had sailed so I tried to right my own but the damage had been done, you looked at me like I was Mr. Hollywood, just out for one thing. So, when things would get tough, I would take the ring out and just stare at it, then write a love scene for Rook."

******************************************************************************/

New York City

Dr. Carter Burke Office

The following Tuesday

Rick and Kate had spent the remainder of the previous week in the Hamptons, time spent between discovering the house, and themselves. Kate was actually a very good decorator, with some fantastic ideas. They prioritized which projects needed to be done first, then called Rick's General Contractor to draw up the plans and contract. Friday, they signed the work order contract, and work would begin Monday on their beach home.

Now it was Tuesday, time to begin the remodel and reconstruction if you will on each of the two individuals to allow them to form one united front, exciting but frightening as well. Kate had called and spoken to Dr. Burke, and requested a double long session, to accommodate both her and Rick.

The ride in from the Hamptons had been quiet, as Rick struggled with what to expect, he trusted Kate, and if this was the Doctor that had convinced her to continue therapy, he had to be good.

"Rick don't be nervous; Doctor Burke is very kind and patient. I'm not sure what format he will want to follow, but I know it will all be fine. I know that because as long as I have you, I have all I ever want", as she picked up his free hand and kissed it gently.

"You know me too well, Thanks Kate, I know it'll be fine, I just hope I'm too big of a project to take on for the poor Doctor." He smiled and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

Her eyebrows roll, "Right, like I was a piece of cake for him, Babe, after what he did for me, I think you are a breath of fresh air."

They arrived at the Parking Garage and chose to use the stairs, Rick pausing for a long cleansing breath before he entered the floor and the Doctor's office. Kate checked in with his secretary, and then joined Rick on the sofa. A few minutes later the door opened, and Dr. Burke came out,

"Kate, it's good to see you, and hear you're doing well, this must be Mr. Castle we've had so many talks about, Welcome, Mr. Castle." As he extended his hand for a handshake.

"Hi Doctor, it's just Rick or Castle, the Mr. makes me feel old, well older," as he lets out a nervous laugh, just realizing he hasn't let go of Kate's hand since they parked the car. She gently patted it, with her free hand, and gently kissed his cheek, whispering. "I'm here, I got you"

"Very well Rick, I'd like to review the format and get yours and Kate's input to see if this will work to achieve what you desire."

"I'm sure you know what's best Doctor, so why don't we review your proposed agenda," Kate responded firmly and politely, still clinging to Rick's hand trying to give him strength she knew he needed.

"Very Well Kate, As you know, all information shared between client and myself is privileged, therefore, there will be some occasions when it's best I meet with either you or Rick alone, please understand this is not to give one a tactical advantage over the other, but more to protect my obligations as a Professional"

Rick smiled, the first real smile Kate had witnessed since they had left the Hamptons,

"Doc, we're not trying to get an advantage over each other, we're trying to heal for each other so that nothing we have done in our past will ever rise to be an issue in our upcoming marriage."

"I see Rick, oh by the way Congratulations Kate, I'm very happy and Rick, I can say this without violating confidentiality, I'm sure you made Kate very happy with this development in your relationship.

You mentioned incidents you both did to hurt each other, Kate would you agree that this is what you're looking to resolve as well?"

"Dr. Burke, what I want is to be sure all our past stays in the past, and that we only go forward not rehash historical events that neither of us can do, some of which you and I have already discussed, some we haven't.

I want to insure that I have the coping skills that when a false statement is printed about my husband, I can approach it like a loving wife, and ask a question that won't accuse or blame Rick for something he many not even know anything about.

I have the habit, as you well know to jump to conclusions, usually incorrectly, but I still keep going down that path, and I can't, or won't hurt Rick again by doing that."

Rick blushes as Dr. Burke looks at him,

"Would you agree with Kate's statement Rick, often she jumps to an erroneous conclusion that had a simple answer if she had asked?"

"Well, I mean, I*"

"Babe, just answer him truthfully, don't worry about hurting my feelings by telling the truth. We both know that we have both been guilty of this, me more than you ever were so please Rick, don't think about my feelings when you answer."

Rick flashed her a smile, "OK Doctor, as my fiancé has said yes, I agree, but also that I have been guilty of the same thing as well."

"Rick, I think Kate has learned a great deal about how this treatment works, honesty, even sometimes when it may be uncomfortable, is the only way to work through the issues you may be facing or could face in the future.

Our goal is to provide you with the tools to understand the occurrence is happening, then to take a moment and consider all of the examples and tools we have discussed, then formulate your opinion. BUT it doesn't stop there, the next step is approaching your partner is such a fashion that won't create even more friction." Dr. Burke peers over his glasses as he made a few additional notes.

Kate looks relieved that Rick was open, and honest with Doctor Burke. She had worried silently that his will to protect her at all costs would follow them into counselling,

"Dr Burke how do you suggest we proceed now that you know what our desired outcome will be? "Kate was polite yet firm, a tone which Dr. Burke had only heard on a few occasions.

"Well, Kate, I would like to start with Rick in a private session, you and I have the advantage of past history, so I would like to get to know him a little one on one, so perhaps you could give us 45 minutes, time to get a decent cup of coffee across the street" he smiled knowing how much Kate deplored the guest coffee offered in his waiting room.

Kate walked over to Rick, gave him a hug and brief kiss on the cheek, " I love you Babe, even more for doing this with me, it'll be all right, I'll be back in a few minutes", she whispered as she saw the sweat beads break out on his forehead.

"Sure, thing Doctor Burke, I'll have the latte, and relax a bit, see you in 45 minutes or so" as she walked out the rear exit door for privacy.

"OK Rick, once again anything you say to me is in confidence, no one can ever hear or learn of our conversations without your written approval. So why don't you start at the beginning of you story, I have the version from Kate, but I'd like to hear yours as well."

Rick began at the dinner with Demming in the break room, only to have Doctor Burke ask probing questions about "Was that the first time you had worked with the Detective from I believe it was the Robbery Division, or had you worked together before."

Rick knew he was busted so out it came the entire hurtful story of how Kate had allowed the treatment, her infatuation with the new detective, her failure to control her team from taking shots at him and finally the public display of affection in the stairwell, he was sure was staged to send him a message. He recounted the reaction to his interruption to their makeshift Dinner Date, and how lost he felt when he heard Kate's dismissal and laughter.

Leaving out the pertinent details he explained that he had broken the contract with his publisher, and strangely through the process had grown closer to his ex-wife and editor, leading all the way up to a proposal 6 months ago.

"Why did you propose to Gina Rick, were you in love with her, and are you still today?"

"Well Doctor, to answer your question I love her, I did when I first married her, through our divorce, and especially during the time she provided me a shelter from the hurt I felt from Kate, but I never was in love with her, nor she with me. We found out her first love came back into her life quite by accident, and now they have reunited,"

"How does that make you feel Rick, your ex-wife reuniting with a love you knew nothing about?" Dr. Burke doesn't look up but is jotting note feverishly on a pad.

"Well at first it hurt, the old familiar tone of rejection came ringing in my ears, then we talked and she was right, I was settling for her, she didn't want to be a replacement for anyone, but especially Kate since she knew how badly she had hurt me." Rick sad sadly

"Have you and Kate talked about this, your feelings, and why you asked another woman to remarry you when your heart was still with her?" Dr. Burke certainly didn't pull any punches, right to the heart of the matter.

"Strangely enough Doctor Burke it was Gina who orchestrated the first step in reuniting Kate and I, it was she who also scolded me for comments she felt were too harsh, and she and Kate talked a great deal.

I think Kate understood that I ran, took a coward's way out and sought a safe harbor that I knew. I know I loved Gina and thought if anyone could make me forget about Kate, it would be her.

My young assistant at the new project, quite attractive and very well endowed tried to have a physical relationship when we first met, but she was hurting and once we got to know each other she was thankful, I didn't respond. I was tempted, but I knew it would only complicate things even more."

"It's interesting you describe your actions as taking the coward's way out. Do you really feel that is what you did, or was it perhaps just the most viable option at the time to keep you from deepening the hurt, or lashing back with anger?" Once again Dr. Burke has nailed him, no wonder Kate liked him so much.

"Thinking about it, I think your explanation is more accurate Doctor, I mean I didn't want anyone else to feel the pain, so I left and those that cared about me, decided to help. I suppose that wasn't cowardly after all, but it still wasn't the best way to deal with the conflict." Rick sighed,

"Rick, Kate described you as "A person who will wear the weight of the world on his shoulders when anyone he cares about is in danger, or is hurting, he takes on too much and he always has" would that be a fair assessment?"

"She knows me pretty well Doctor, so yes, I suppose that would be not only accurate but fair as well" Rick smiled thinking about just how well they did know each other,

"One final point before we bring Kate back Rick, Is there anything that we need to discuss, that would hurt Kate, if brought up in a group discussion. She's aware of your relationship with Gina, has there been anymore that she is not aware of that would be pertinent to this situation. We can leave out the girlfriends from high school, just in say the last ten years." Dr. Burke asked, with the slightest of smiles.

"Well, I know she knows ABOUT Kyra and Meredith, but I don't think she knows the details, so perhaps it would be wise to air those out while we are in this controlled atmosphere?"

"Very Well, We can do that, I see that Kate is back so let's bring her back in and conclude our first session". He presses a button, speaks a few words low, and then Kate strides through the door, with two coffees, hers and Ricks.

Rick smiled at her, "Consider it a first installment for my repayment of the 100 plus I owe you" she whispered in his ear, once again she kissed his cheek and sat down beside him.

"Well Kate we had a very productive first session, and I think I am about up to speed with Rick's background. Is there anything you want to discuss, or shall I just give you the homework for next week?"

Rick sputtered, as Kate laughed, "Relax Rick, it's not like we have to do a research paper, I'm sure it won't be that bad. I think we're ready for the homework Doctor and Thank You."

"Certainly, Kate, I would like you both to think of three incidents, occurrences, events or times in your life you think your partner should know about and doesn't yet. Don't discuss it, just think about it carefully, then think how that event is influencing your life now if at all." Does the same time next week work for you, Dr. Burke asked, and muttered great, see you both next week.

Rick and Kate left the office with their assignment, both wondering what hadn't they told the other,