Harry woke up Christmas morning with his mouth dry, tongue sticking to the roof of his mouth as he sat up. It took him a moment to realize what was so different about waking up this morning—oh, right, how couldn't he have noticed that he was naked, and there was a human being sleeping next to him. That wasn't fucking normal.

His eyes widened as he took in the sight of Draco Malfoy beside him, completely naked and fast asleep. Her hair cascaded over the pillow, long and blonde, her naked chest rising and falling gently as she slept. Harry tore his gaze away from her breasts, albeit with some difficulty, so he could watch her face. She was drooling, which he didn't think he'd ever see her do. He never dared to even hope that Malfoy could drool. Her skin was its usual pale color, except for the rather impressive number of hickeys peppered over her neck and collarbone.

The night's events came back to him, making him flush as he remembered just how he'd given her those hickeys. The curtains were pulled closed around his bed, but he wasn't sure if any of his roommates had poked their heads in or heard something during the night. Only Neville and Ron were here, but it would still be embarrassing to be discovered so exposed . . . knowing his friends, though, they probably wouldn't have peeked if they heard anything.

Okay, he knew Neville wouldn't, but Ron was a different story. It was only the fact that Harry's preferences involved female parts that he felt safe that Ron hadn't looked—breasts weren't exactly Ron's favorite thing to look at.

Harry, however, was quite the opposite.

Malfoy stirred, and Harry gently pulled a wet lock of hair off of her cheek. She scrunched her nose up as she realized that, not only had she drooled, but Harry had seen it. He just smirked at her when she batted his hand away.

"Malfoy," Harry whispered to her, "Happy Christmas." She shifted so that she could meet his eyes more easily, suddenly smiling in a way that made Harry's blood rush downwards. She leaned in and kissed him, hard and greedy, and he couldn't mistake what she wanted.

Malfoy pulled away from him slightly, just enough so she could ask, "Time?"

"Five, I think," Harry answered, breath hitching as her hand wandered down to grip his steadily hardening cock. She suddenly threw her leg over Harry, pushing him down onto his back so she was straddling him, leaving him gasping. She wasted no time in grinding herself down on him, drawing another gasp out of him as she leaned down to catch his lips in a searing kiss.

"You ready for round two?" she murmured against his lips, and Harry could only groan in response.

~xXx~

Ron woke up to the sounds of someone moaning and panting—it took him a moment to work out what exactly was happening and when he did, he sat up and looked around the room. His eyes went to Neville's bed first, considering he severely doubted that Neville even knew how sex worked, and it'd be easier to spot Neville than guess about Harry's usually-closed curtains.

So needless to say, Ron wasn't shocked when he saw Neville sitting up in bed too, pale and jaw open in shock. Ron could only grin. Poor Neville must've been scandalized.

But for him, what a way to wake up on Christmas, eh?

When Neville saw that he was awake, he pointed to Harry's bed, as if he was pointing to a bug that he wanted Ron to kill for him.

"Potter. . . ahh," the sound of a girl's voice came through the drapes. Ron shot up immediately and went to Neville's bed, rather than let himself get all bothered by what he knew was happening. He reminded himself that it was Harry in that bed, and that was definitely enough to deflate his cock the bit it had hardened.

Not that he'd give Harry a hard pass, but he just wasn't into the thought of shagging his best mate.

"Do you know who it is?" Ron whispered once he'd sat down next to Neville, doubting that he'd get an answer, and Neville just shook his head. They argued for a moment over interrupting Harry, Ron taking the "pro-interruption" side, because he couldn't resist this opportunity. Maybe he was hanging around Fred and George too much, thinking like that, but he couldn't entirely bring himself to care at the moment.

He won the argument. Of course.

"Harry?" he called hesitantly, half-expecting that they wouldn't hear him. But lucky for him, the sounds immediately stopped. Ron knew he was much too amused for the situation.

"Fuck," Harry exclaimed, voice only slightly muffled by the curtains. He poked his head out from behind the curtain, which startled Ron, and he could tell that whoever was with him had shifted on the bed. His face was red and sweaty, hair plastered to his forehead. Ron raised his eyebrows—how long had they been going at it?

"Erm... morning?" Harry offered tentatively, which made both Ron and the girl laugh. Harry bristled, Neville shuddered, and Ron tried very hard to stop his laughter.

"Mate, who are you shagging?" he asked, after he allowed himself a few more moments of chuckling, and Neville buried his face in his hands. The girl laughed again and Harry's skin somehow flushed an even deeper red.

"Ron, that's what you say?" Neville groaned, his head still down. Ron shrugged.

"What? Straight to the point," he said unapologetically, which made Neville groan again. Harry ducked back behind his curtains, likely because the girl pulled him back, and Ron heard the whole entire conversation Harry had with her.

"You can tell them who I am, but I'm not done with you." Her voice was strangely familiar, but it was hard to place from how husky it was, which Ron was sure it wasn't usually. No one walked around on the norm sounding like they'd just been pounded for hours.

Ron found a part of himself wondering what Hermione would sound like after a good shag before he could shake the thought off. Poor Neville was horrified, and Ron frankly was too after that image popped into his head.

"Are you sure?" Harry's voice was hoarse.

"Yes, just to get them to go away. I'm still so wet for you," she said, practically moaning. Now Ron was starting to get uncomfortable—he definitely didn't need to hear that. Now that he thought about it, maybe hearing anything at all was too much… it was starting to get weird.

"We're still here, you know," Neville said, his voice high-pitched.

"Right," Harry said with a deep breath, probably pulling himself together. "We're going to get some clothes on before we do this, so I'd prefer it if you averted your eyes."

Neville, extremely uncomfortable with the situation, shot off the bed and went into the bathroom before Harry even finished speaking. Ron, ever the lazy one, did just what Harry said and stared at the floor. He heard the familiar sound of the curtains rustling and of them getting dressed, unable to stop his nose from wrinkling as the smell of sex hit him—apparently the curtains had kept it in. He nudged the floor with his toes, resisting the temptation to look up.

"Alright," Harry said at last, and Ron immediately looked to see Harry beside his bed, rubbing the back of his neck, and further to the left stood…

"Malfoy?" Ron asked incredulously, jaw dropping for a moment in his shock. She scowled at him. His teeth clicked audibly when he shut his mouth, trying to fully comprehend what he was seeing.

He'd never seen Malfoy so unkempt. Her hair was everywhere, her cheeks flushed and a thin layer of sweat shining on her skin. It was unnerving, to say the least.

"Well…" Harry started, obviously unsure of what to say next. Ron wasn't quite sure how to feel about it all, but one thing was for sure: Malfoy was definitely glaring at him to get out and, as much as he loved cockblocking on a good day, his day would most decidedly not be good if he didn't get the fuck out and let them finish.

"I'll be in the common room. Enjoy, er, each other, I suppose," Ron said quickly, giving a silent prayer for Neville, who was still trapped in the bathroom. Merlin have mercy on him—let Harry remember to cast Muffliato.

~xXx~

Hermione woke up early in the hopes of having a few minutes alone in the common room so she could read in silence. Her hopes were quickly dashed when she saw Ron sitting in the second-most comfortable armchair, staring into the fire. Hermione took her place across from Ron—naturally, the first-most comfortable armchair in the common room—and looked at him expectantly.

But he didn't look back at her, which made her frown at him. He looked as though he'd eaten something that made him just about this close from heaving the contents of his stomach up. It wasn't even seven in the morning yet, what could've happened already?

"What's wrong?" she asked, concern in her voice. Ron raised his eyebrows, but didn't do much more to acknowledge that he'd heard her at all.

"Ron?" she asked, firmer this time, growing more worried about him. Did something happen between him and Harry? She hadn't seen him act like this before… what if someone hurt him? What happened?

She opened her mouth to ask him more questions, mind getting away from her, but Ron spoke before she could.

"Harry's shagging Malfoy right now," he said. Casually. Flippantly. Hermione blinked, and stared at Ron for a second, then blinked again.

And then she burst out laughing.

That got Ron looking at her.

"What?" he asked indignantly. "I don't see how this is funny." That only made Hermione laugh harder. She hated to be the bearer of bad news (she really did), but this was just perfect. What a Christmas present! Hermione didn't know who had it best—herself, who finally got to fill Ron in; Ron, who would finally be in the loop; or Harry, who was likely getting a good shag.

"Ron—Harry's been having sex with Malfoy for weeks," she finally gasped out. She clutched her aching sides, taking deep breaths as she calmed herself. Ron spluttered.

"What! Why didn't anyone tell me?" he asked, voice an octave higher than usual, which Hermione loved to tease him about. No one wanted their voice to get higher the angrier they got. By the glare he gave her, she knew better than to mention it at the moment.

"I wasn't going to tell you until Harry was ready to tell you. And clearly, he was just fine with showing you too, judging by the state you're in!" Hermione said, letting out a few too many obscene giggles for Ron's taste, which made him leave the common room entirely. Hermione had no doubt that he was going down to the Great Hall. Even though he was traumatized, Ron Weasley wouldn't miss breakfast unless it was the day of a Quidditch match.

A little while later, after reading a few pages of her book, Hermione made her way to the Great Hall. Ron was already stuffing himself full of eggs and sausage, apparently very keen on forgetting what he'd seen earlier that morning. Honestly, she just didn't understand what the big fuss was about—it was a good thing, even! It might finally resolve their animosity towards each other, maybe even bridge the ever-growing chasm between their houses.

She piled a few sausages onto her plate while she told Ron all of this. He didn't acknowledge it except for a grunt here and there, shooting her a disbelieving look as she reached the end of her rant. She shrugged, but she did have to admit that it was a bit of stretch to hope for that much to come from Harry and Malfoy being together . . . or hooking up. Or whatever they were doing.

She didn't even know, at this point, which annoyed her to no end, but she'd get it out of Harry this morning.

Hermione became so immersed in her book—a Muggle romance novel that she'd found that summer but hadn't had the time to read—that she didn't even see Harry walk into the Great Hall. Of course, she noticed when he plopped down next to her, smelling as if he tried to take a shower, but had gotten distracted while he was washing up. His hair was still wet, a blush high on his cheeks, looking like he'd just had the best sex he'd ever had. Hermione shook her head, amazed at Harry's lack of care regarding his own appearance after something like that.

Not to mention that people kept glancing over at him—Harry really was awful at looking normal, and rumors followed him like a shadow.

And two of those people noticing, Hermione noticed, were Professor McGonagall and Snape. Which just wouldn't do.

"Happy Christmas," Harry chirped, and Hermione took out her wand. Before Harry could ask what she was doing, she cast a couple cleaning charms on Harry. He blinked at her.

"Happy Christmas," she said, grinning at him and turning back to her book.

"I—what was that?" he asked, startled, which made Ron snicker and almost choke on his eggs.

"Cleaning charms. You needed them," she said simply. Ron laughed harder, loosening up a bit after the shock he'd got earlier, which made Hermione smile a bit in relief. Harry, on the other hand, flushed deeply and buried his head in his hands.

"Harry!" Ron suddenly said, scowling, making Harry's head snap up. Hermione hissed at him to lower his voice and, fortunately, he did. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Harry blushed even deeper. "We didn't want anyone to know," he murmured. Ron scoffed, and Hermione had to internally too. For not wanting anyone to know, they sure were careless...

"Then how did Hermione know?" he asked, fixing Harry with an accusatory stare. He squirmed. Hermione really shouldn't be enjoying Ron torturing Harry, but she wasn't going to stop it.

"You know Hermione. She just figures things out on her own," Harry said. Ron finally sighed and nodded his agreement. It was true, Hermione was just too smart for her own good.

"Just, you know you can always tell us anything, mate," Ron said sincerely. Harry grinned. Hermione peeked at them out of the corner of her eye, knowing they might not get mushy if they remembered that Hermione was with them.

"I know," Harry said, reaching across the table to pat Ron on the back of the hand. Hermione was so proud of them—they weren't as emotionally handicapped as everyone else might think.

She dabbed fake tears from her eyes and sniffled, reminding them about what was happening around them.

Harry laughed awkwardly, pulling his hand back, and Ron cleared his throat. They both turned red.

"No, don't stop on my account," Hermione croaked through her fake sniffles. "What a beautiful moment."

"Oh, shove it," Harry laughed, and Hermione couldn't help but laugh too. It was infectious. Ron just shook his head, though, smiling and ducking his head to hide the fact that he was.

They fell into silence for a few minutes, Hermione turning her attention back to her back as she ate, until Ron broke the silence.

"So it was good, then?" he blurted. Hermione snickered as Harry spluttered and tried to figure out how to answer that. Hermione had to admit, she wasn't sure how she would answer that either. And she might've been worried that Harry was going to choke, but she was confident enough in Harry's ability to cough that she wasn't too concerned.

"I'm sure it was more than satisfactory for Harry," she said, practically smirking, much to his embarrassment and Ron's amusement. They fell into silence again, once Harry had stopped choking and Ron's laughter had died away.

Trust Ron to break the silence again.

"Are you dating her, or…?" he trailed off. Harry shook his head vehemently. Ron shared a look with Hermione.

"No!" Harry said. "We're just, I dunno, hooking up. I guess." He frowned, apparently realizing that he had no idea what his relationship with Malfoy was. Hermione quirked her eyebrow and picked at an invisible piece of lint on her robes.

"Oh, well, I'm sure it'll all sort itself out mate," Ron said awkwardly. Hermione rolled her eyes—there was no possible way that Harry could just ignore it and hope for the best like Ron suggested, but of course he just nodded along and agreed. Hermione gave a deep, pointed sigh that both Ron and Harry ignored, only frustrating her even more. Boys

She shook her head, flipping open her book to where she last left off. At least the characters there didn't have skulls as thick as Harry and Ron's.

A/N: I didn't want to update this until I had the second chapter finished, but I also didn't want to take 20 years to do that. So... much happier with this version of chapter one than I was the original. I can stop cringing when I think about it now. Except that chapter two be reworked as well!