III

Rosa and Gina sit curled together on the couch in the Diaz house while Lucianna, Bianca -who are 15 and 12 now- and Rosa's nieces open their presents with fascination. Rosa smiles watching her two youngest sisters enjoy the Christmas spirit before the reality of the world hits them. Renata sits with her boyfriend, whispering to each other. The only person missing is Elena who couldn't fly up from Florida for the holidays because of snow. Gina watches with her own little smile, enjoying the antics of the Diaz family, and with the growing excitement her little secret holds.

Rosa plays with her wedding rings and Gina hums softly as Julia and Oscar hand out the last of the presents to the kids and then look at the small pile for the other adults. Lucianna and Bianca come over and give Rosa and Gina big hugs and sloppy cheek kisses to show their thanks while Rosa's nieces give them quick hugs and polite thank-you.

"Julia," Gina calls out, "save our gift to you for last."

Julia nods and dispenses the remainder of the presents. Gina gets a candle, a phone case, a purse and a lotion and perfume set while Rosa gets some shirts, money, more money and a knife polishing set. Julia nearly passed out when she saw her son give Rosa a knife polishing set but couldn't stay mad when Bianca pointed out that Rosa would love that and Rosa agreed. Everyone else opened their gifts while Rosa kept playing with her wedding rings and Gina was focusing on tracing the small dots on Rosa's sweater.

"Calm down, babe," Gina whispered.

Rosa nodded, taking Gina's hand in hers but didn't answer.

"Alrighty, Gina, Rosa we're opening yours now," Oscar said, holding the slim package in front of himself and Julia.

Gina cheered and rubbed circles on Rosa's hand with her thumb while Rosa squeezed her hand with all her might it seemed.

Gina and Rosa watched, with their breath held, as Julia ripped off the wrapping paper and then Oscar pulled up the lid on the small box. He pulled out the positive pregnancy test and then a small ultrasound picture.

He sucked in a breath and showed it to his wife who's hands flew up to her mouth as tears sprang to her eyes.

"Ay Dios mios. Is this you? Is this your baby?" Julia asked, holding the picture towards Gina and Rosa.

Gina nodded, her smile threatening to split her face in half. Gina felt Rosa's grip losen and she could tell she had relaxed.

"Ay Dios mios. No lo puedo creer, estoy muy feliz," Julia cried, springing towards Gina and Rosa to embrace them in a bear hug.

Gina felt Rosa's shoulders shake next to her in what she recognized as her crying.

"Don't cry, mija. This is a good thing," Julia said, wiping Rosa's tears. "Aren't you happy?"

"I'm so happy. I was just worried about what you would say."

"Ah, well don't worry anymore. The more grandbabies the better," Julia said merrily. "Now who's carrying?"

Gina waved and smiled while Julia pressed a kiss to her fingertips and then to Gina's abdomen.

The Christmas festivities had died down and Rosa's brother and family had gone home hours ago. Renata and her fiance were at a local hotel, leaving Gina and Rosa alone in Rosa's childhood bedroom. Gina loved that room, she had so many good memories in there. They were laying side by side, hands entwined looking at the ceiling as the had done so many times before, before they got together and after.

"I'm glad your family took it well," Gina said lazily.

"No they didn't," Rosa said sharply.

"What do you mean?"

"My brother had some things to say. It's fine."

Gina rolled onto her side, facing her wife. "What did he say?"

"Nothing babe. Don't worry about it," Rosa tried to assure her wife.

"Baby, don't do this."

Rosa stared into her wife's eyes, trying to search for any judgement. "He said we were a waste of women. A waste of a marriage. That the baby would never truly be ours."

"Well he was wrong. I've never heard anything more wrong in my life. And I knew Jake growing up."

Rosa chuckled lightly and pulled Gina closer, wrapping her arms around her waist. "I love you babe."

"I love you more."

Rld_gld

Rosa's shirt barely fit over Gina's growing stomach anymore. It seemed like everyday she was bigger and bigger. She was eight months now and none of her clothes seemed to fit anymore, not even the ones she took from Rosa.

Her leggings barely covered the underside of her bump, the shirt didn't come all the way over her shirt and her feet were too swollen for any shoes besides flip flops but she had to get to the precinct now. She had been on maternity for the last week now as her due date crawled near but right now there was an active shooting at Park Avenue Hotel and Gina had to know whether her wife was okay or not. She closed the door as she left their condo, shimmying the lock so it clicked shut and then walking to the stairs where she maneuvered her way down.

Finding her car in the garage would take too much time and so would waiting for an Uber so Gina set herself in the direction of the precinct and started walking. Well waddling was more like it. By the time she reached the building she could feel sweat dripping down herself in rivulets. Her breathing was labored but she was so close. She pressed the button on the elevator and then sank back onto the wall.

She was relieved to have something to lean on after standing for so long. After what seemed like too short of a time the elevator doors dinged open and she heaved her self up and walked into the bullpen.

"Gina, are you okay?" Terry asked, clearly alarmed.

Gina looked shocked, she hadn't expected to be noticed so quickly.

"Yeah, yeah, I just walked here from the house. Is Rosa okay?" Gina panted, lowering herself into the chair that Amy rolled over for her.

"Why on Earth would you do that, Gi?" Jake asked, not looking up from his case.

"I saw the shooting on the news and I had to know is she was okay. Now tell me, is she okay?" The desperation in her voice was becoming apparent as Gina stopped bothering to hide her worry.

The team shared a look and Terry took her hand. "She went in. We've been keeping an ear on the radio and so far, so good. Have faith, Gina. She wouldn't let anything happen to herself so close to your little girl's due date."

Gina narrowed her eyes into slits. "You let her go," she said, lowering her voice so much Terry's eyes widened and he dropped his hand quickly.

"G, it's gonna be okay. Rosa's a badass." Terry's voice shook as he spoke and Gina could see the fear in his eyes.

It felt impossible to breath at the moment and Gina thought the world was going to collapse around her. She saw Jake point at herself and mouth 'distract her' and Terry nodded.

"So did you guys pick a name for the little girl?" Terry prompted.

Gina rubbed the exposed skin on her midriff. She heard the elevator bing and she pushed down the thought it could be Rosa. "We're gonna name her Enigma."

"No we aren't," Rosa said softly, laying her hand on Gina's shoulder.

Gina whirled around so quickly the edges of her vision went blurry. When her eyes confirmed that the voice had been Rosa, Gina felt such a wave of relief and joy she thought she might collapse. Rosa smiled quickly but then shut her face back down.

"You're okay," Gina said, her voice an octave or two higher than normal.

"Of course I am. I can't just leave you and the baby all alone can I?" Rosa said snarkily, but she reached out and pulled Gina close to her. The event had scared Rosa out of her wits and the entire time she thought about how much she could not die. She wasn't the one who took out the shooter, thankfully, because if she had to she might have frozen up. She just needed to be close to her wife right now.

Gine barely contained a sob, but let the tears escape from her eyes. Then her nails dug into Rosa's shoulders.

"Babe, what the hell?" Rosa screeched, trying to wriggle away from Gina.

"The baby," Gina hissed, digging her nails further into Rosa as she suffocated in pain. "The baby wants out."

Rosa's mouth dropped into an O and she nodded. "Let's go have a baby then."

Lots of screaming and lots of pain later, Rosa was holding her baby while Gina slept not so peacefully. The baby had blue eyes like Gina and had a few dark curls on her head. During the intense hours before the baby was born Gina and Rosa decided on the name Emila. Rosa rocked back and forth, cooing to the infant waiting for her family to arrive.

They did very soon. And very loudly. So loudly Gina had yelled at them to be quiet. They understood of course, most of them having experienced younger Diaz siblings being born. Julia cradled the baby, smiling so widely Rosa thought her mother's face would split in half. Her brother and sister-in-law even came, sporting their own small pregnancy bump. Her sister-in-law apologized for what her brother had said when they revealed the pregnancy. Rosa begrudgingly accepted the apology and let her hold Emila.

Rld_gld

Rosa was now pregnant and she had to admit she did not like it, at all. Her skin itched and burned. She felt sick and oily and sad. Sad all the time, sick all the time. She was never doing this again. No matter how many times Gina said it would be fun if they each carried two babies, Rosa was never going to be pregnant again.

Emila was three now, and had been so excited when her moms told her she was going to be an older sister. She had bragged about it to anyone who would listen for months. It made Rosa's heart soar. She loved her kids so much. More than she loved anything else - secretly, maybe a tiny bit more than she loved Gina. Just a pinch. Between Gina, Emila and the fetus, Rosa was so full of love she couldn't remember a time when she ever felt lonely. She couldn't remember the times she laid in bed feeling like a failure, laid in bed hating Gina.

She had the baby early. Scarily early to her and Gina, but the doctors assured her it was all okay since the baby was only two months early.

She had been knocked down at work. She was supposed to be on desk duty after five months but she was driving by and the woman was in danger. The woman was pressed against the wall, a man hovering over her, a knife to her neck, ripping off her dress.

She had pulled over her car, snapped a few pictures and intervened. Her knocked her down, hitting her stomach on the ground as she fell. Rosa stood up shakily, a deep feeling something was wrong settling between her ribs. She cuffed the guy, told the woman how she could submit evidence, then drove him to the precinct.

She could feel something dripping down her leg, she did not want to find out if it was blood or pee or her water. She just dropped him in holding, collapsed in her chair and yelled for someone to call Gina and for someone to get her to the damn hospital.

The fall had ruptured the amniotic sac, requiring an emergency c-section. Her mom, Julia, held her hand through the surgery, both of them crying. Rosa wanted Gina there with her but she was with Emila and the squad and her other family.

Finally, the little girl was placed on her chest and Rosa began to sob. Her mother wiped her face, and whispered sweet nothings into her ear. It reminded both of them of a deeply darker time.

Now Rosa was sitting on the hospital bed, holding the brand new baby, Emila and Gina asleep next to her. They had named the baby Juliana, a tribute to her mother- who had been there for both of them when they needed her.

"I love you baby," Gina had whispered before she fell asleep. "I'm happy you're okay."

Rld_gld

After Juliana was born, no one spoke of having another baby in front of Rosa and Gina. Both of them were too scared to even play with the idea again, after what had almost happened. When Juliana was one, Amy got pregnant. She tried to downplay it but everyone knew how happy she and Jake were. Gina and Rosa were happy for them too. They would be great parents. They named their twin boys Charlie and Ryan, Gina was guessing after Charles and Captain Holt.

Rosa appreciated Amy, who listened to pregnancy stories and wanted to take notes about her experience. And asked what having a c-section was like. Rosa was the most grateful Amy always ended their talks with, 'you're a great mom, Rosa.' It made her feel like the fall wasn't her fault.

When Emila was five and Juliana was two Gina mentioned it again. "Rosa, I want another baby," she had said.

They were in the kitchen, the girls were in bed. They were sitting on the counter, leaning against each other, drinking tea. "Okay."

"I don't want to upset you. I know having Juliana was hard for you but I feel like I was made to be a mom. Like your mom was." Gina took Rosa's hand, kissing it softly.

That made Rosa cry. Rosa didn't cry much but after the pregnancy, and the fear, and being a mom she cried more often. She rubbed her scar through her shirt. "I'm not carrying."

Gina kissed her sweetly, a gentle promise, a reassurance. "I would never ask you to."

Rosa kissed her more intensely. "I love you, Gina. I love you so, so, much."

Gina had her baby a year later, carrying for a perfect nine months. They had a little boy who they named Daniel. Rosa liked having a change from all the pink around their house. Tiny blue onesies were more her speed than the pink tutus and dresses Gina loved to put Emila and Juliana in.

Rld_gld

"I want to quit my job." Gina said one morning to Rosa. The kids were still asleep, which was a rarity, since the newest addition, an adopted infant named Louisa liked to howl at all hours of the morning.

Their son Daniel had only been a few months old when Rosa arrested a pregnant lady for murder. She kept tabs on the mom and she and Gina adopted the baby as soon as she was born. She had straight blonde hair and green eyes, but Rosa could already see Gina's personality rubbing off on her. Their family was complete, they agreed. So why not, Rosa thought.

"Why?"

"I want to be an influencer. Online. Make the G-hive blow up. I mean it's growing now but with devotion it could rise," she explained, pirouetting around the room.

"Let me get a promotion. Then you can."

Gina furrowed her eyebrows. "Why?"

"I just want to make sure we'll be okay once you pursue your dream."

Gina moved toward Rosa, capturing her lips in her own. "I love you."

"I love you too."

Rld_gld

"That's my wife!" Gina embarrassingly yelled as Rosa stood on stage being promoted to Captain.

Gina was so proud of her wife she though her heart would explode. It seemed like just yesterday Rosa was the mean girl she almost hooked up with at a high school party and yet here they were. Gina a media sensation, Rosa a police captain, four kids aged twelve, nine, six and five. They had made it.

There had been no destination when they blindly made out in the bedroom of a mutual, no destination when Gina caught herself falling for Rosa, no destination when they first really kissed on Rosa's roof and yet Gina felt like they had reached that destination.

She was happy, she was full, and she was married to a police captain. "That's my girl!" she yelled again.

Louisa tugged on the sleeve of her dress. "Mommy, you're embarrassing Momma."

"I know, sweetheart," Gina said, beaming at Rosa who was giving her a stern look but the happiness was in her eyes. "I know."

When the ceremony was over, Rosa walked over to her wife and kissed her before bending down to hug her children. As they were driving around later that night, drinking milkshakes with the kids asleep in the backseat Rosa said: "I'm really glad it was you that I mixed my phone up with."

And Gina felt her heart flutter in her chest.