I'd like to go to different cities to see the writing.

0o0o0o

Feliciano's grandfather had told him many times not to make stupid, rash decisions, which he thought about as he dug his fingers into the windowsill a bit harder. Lovino was definitely friends with Antonio, but Feliciano wanted to know how, and why he was denying it, and what was happening with the shoeboxes in the larger box.

'Be careful,' Ludwig whispered up to him.

'I am, just make sure nobody sees me,' Feliciano whispered back. 'Do you know where Antonio lives?'

'Down the road-'

'Shh! Gilbert's taking something out.' Feliciano craned his head, holding his breath. Gilbert was holding...a stick? No, a flute, he'd seen one in the music store. 'Ludwig, did you know Gilbert had a flute?'

'No.' Ludwig looked like he wanted to climb up as well, but thought better of it. 'I thought the sheet music he had was for piano.'

'It was.' Feliciano leaned closer, hoping he'd see more, but his foot slipped and Gilbert jerked up and Feliciano dropped down so fast he scraped his hands.

'Feliciano! Are you okay? Did he see you?' Ludwig asked, pulling him up and brushing him off. Feliciano shook his head.

'He didn't see me, I was careful.' Ludwig looked like he wanted to say you're not, but Feliciano ignored that. 'I can't go up there again, though, he heard me.'

'You're going to get both of us caught.' Ludwig shook his head and fixed his pageboy cap. 'Feliciano, sometimes I worry about you.'

'I hear that a lot.' Feliciano clapped his stinging hands together. 'It's fine, though, Ludwig, I have you to protect me! And you usually don't care when I do stupid things, or if you do, you're usually right there with me, so I don't worry. Now, let's go find Antonio. I want to know what he's doing with the boxes, and why Gilbert doesn't just keep them in the first place.'

'Probably because Vati would get mad,' Ludwig said. Feliciano made a face.

'He doesn't seem to like a lot of things. I mean, I want to know who Gilbert loves, too, but I wouldn't argue with him over it. If people would just tell me things about why it's such an issue, maybe I wouldn't have to sneak around to figure it out. You said Antonio lived this way?'

'Yes. Why are you going to his house? He said he went downtown.'

'Because I have a feeling about it,' Feliciano said. 'Oh, and because Lovino knew he was lying. I could see it on his face.'

0o0o0o

Antonio lived near the church, and Feliciano took a moment to look up at its stained-glass windows.

'The pastor there doesn't like Gilbert much,' Ludwig said as they snuck past. It was much cooler in the shade, and Feliciano took a moment to rest. The heat was like a hot, wet cloak. 'Apparently he swears too much.'

'He won't like Lovi either, then.' Feliciano dug his fingers into the grass. 'He's a good person, really. Lovino. He just doesn't like to show it.'

'Same with Vati,' Ludwig said.

'Maybe they'd get along,' Feliciano offered, and the concept was so ridiculous that they both ended up muffling laughter.

'What are you two doing?' a voice asked, and Feliciano rolled into his back and found bold blue eyes and saturated gold from his cowlick to his battered America! sneakers.

'Spying on Ludwig's older brother's friend,' he said. 'What about you?'

'Getting a slushie, until I met you, because now I'm going to help you spy! We're going to be heroes! My name's Alfred, what's yours? Hello, Ludwig, what are you doing with him?'

'I'm Feliciano Vargas, we just moved in.'

'I'm making sure Feliciano Vargas doesn't get himself killed.'

'It looks like you need that. I like your cap, Feliciano. Who are we spying on?' Alfred flopped down on the grass, and Feliciano noticed the boy behind him, who had bushy eyebrows and looked really irritated. Feliciano sat closer to Ludwig.

'Antonio took some magazines from Gilbert and since they're not downtown, they're probably at his house, and I'm going to look inside of them,' he explained.

'If they're magazines, they're probably in the church.' Alfred grabbed the irritated boy's hand and pulled him down to sit. 'Didn't you tell me they had a box of porn magazines in the basement?'

'I haven't seen it.' He glanced at Ludwig, who was staring at the grass, ears red. 'Why are you and this boy in a paint smock going to look at the magazines?'

'We were actually just spying on Antonio,' Feliciano interjected, because it looked like Ludwig was going to have a heart attack. 'Ludwig, what's po-'

'Nothing,' Ludwig said. 'Absolutely nothing.'

'It's-' Alfred began.

'No,' his friend said.

Everyone stared at each other for a long moment.

'Let's go check the downstairs out!' Alfred suddenly cried, leaping up. 'I heard there's a back door around here that nobody remembers to lock.'

'Ludwig, who's the guy with the eyebrows?' Feliciano whispered.

'My name is Arthur Kirkland,' Arthur said, sounding even more irritated. Feliciano yelped.

'I'm sorry, you weren't supposed to hear that! Are you mad that we interrupted you getting a slushie? I can understand that, food is really important, but please don't be angry.'

Arthur waved him away and followed Alfred to a rusted metal door in the overgrown weeds.

'Arthur, dude, look at this.' Alfred pried the door open. 'This is amazing. This definitely looks like a place-'

'Haunted by ghosts?' Arthur asked, peering inside. Alfred shrieked.

'Don't say stuff like that, Art!'

'Haven't you heard all the legends?' Arthur asked, strolling down the dark, musty hall. 'Groups of people who disappear down here, after hearing the same rumours about the magazines, never heard from again?'

'You guys go first,' Alfred said, shoving Feliciano and Ludwig in front of him. Feliciano clutched Ludwig's arm. He was almost regretting going in here, but it might make Lovino take him seriously, and he never felt scared when Ludwig was nearby, because the only thing he was scared of was heights, while Feliciano was scared of a lot of things.

'Funny thing is, it's always the person who lags behind who goes missing,' Arthur said, now examining something on the floor. 'Say, is this a bone?'

Alfred made a whimper that sounded a lot like help.

'No, just a rock.' Arthur straightened up and kept walking.

'There aren't any ghosts down here, right?' Feliciano asked. Ludwig shook his head stiffly, eyes darting from side to side.

'No. Definitely not.'

'There aren't. I just don't like it when Alfred calls me Art.' Arthur grinned at them both and turned the corner.

Feliciano wasn't sure what he had expected at the end of the cramped corridor. He could barely imagine Antonio, all sunlight and summer, being in this dark place, but to repeatedly come back to the water-damaged box sitting against the wall seemed even less likely. He still wasn't entirely sure there wasn't any ghosts, but having Ludwig nearby made him feel better.

'Let's look inside!' Alfred shouted, flipping open the cardboard flaps. 'Arthur, keep lookout, okay?'

'For ghosts?'

'For adults,' Alfred said. 'There's no such thing as ghosts. Right? Oh, wow-come here, there's magazines inside.'

Everyone huddled closer. Feliciano couldn't help thinking that his grandfather would ground him for life if he knew Feliciano was looking at magazines. His heart was pounding, and he felt lightheaded.

'I can't believe I'm doing this,' he whispered to Ludwig. Ludwig gave him a look, and his blue eyes shone in the darkness.

'You told me it's time to make reckless decisions, didn't you?'

'I didn't say I didn't want to.'

The first thing Feliciano saw of the magazines was the same thing he'd glimpsed in Gilbert's room-muscles and stretching skin, broad shoulders and sharp jawlines, and his heart did a funny jump and stutter. He looked away, trying to catch his breath, and met Ludwig's eyes. They were strikingly blue, and he was flushed red down to his collar, and Feliciano's stomach twisted in a way he didn't entirely hate.

It was easier to look back at the magazine, and so he did. The man on it wasn't wearing a shirt, and he had the same shoulders Ludwig did, but the wrong eyes, and Feliciano caught himself wondering if Ludwig looked like this under his jacket.

He reached forward and slowly flipped the cover. A few pages in, there was a man with the same blond hair Ludwig had, but slicked back. Feliciano followed the line of his back down to his waist. His face felt hot and his skin felt too tight and his thoughts were all weird and confusing and all he could really understand was Ludwig.

'It's just a muscle magazine,' Alfred said quietly. He picked it up, staring at the picture for a second before folding it and digging deeper into the pile. 'Here-my dad left something like this around once.' He pulled out a magazine with a girl on the front like Gilbert's posters. Feliciano didn't really see her. His head was still thinking of the way Ludwig-the man's muscles looked.

'I should go,' he blurted. He didn't understand what was happening at all, and he wanted Lovino to explain it. 'Nonno will be worried.'

Without waiting for a response, he turned and ran back along the corridor. It was only when he was out in the cooling air of outside did he notice he was breathing hard. He sat down.

'Feliciano?' Ludwig asked, gently touching his shoulder. Feliciano whirled to look at him, and all his explanations or questions failed him. Ludwig looked concerned, and his figure cut a hard silhouette against the setting sun.

'It's nothing,' Feliciano said, jumping up. He managed a smile. 'That was-that was cool, I think, the pictures made me feel all funny, and you-I mean-it's nothing, really. Do you want to go home now?'

'Are you okay?' Ludwig asked. Feliciano nodded.

'I'm fine, even though I think I'm going to overheat or something, because I won't, and you won't have to carry me or anything.' He shut his mouth before he could say anything about how Ludwig probably could carry him and started walking, his head still a mess.

'Feliciano, you're all red.'

'I'm fine, really.' Feliciano waved him off. 'What did you think of the magazines?'

'They were interesting, I suppose.' Ludwig caught his arm. 'Feliciano, are you sure you're okay?'

'The magazines kind of made me feel weird, but not a bad weird, a really good kind of weird which I don't know if I'm supposed to like, and only the muscle magazine, but I don't even have muscles,' Feliciano babbled, desperately hoping Ludwig wouldn't understand what he was really wanting to say. 'You know, I still don't know where the sheet music went,' he added.

Ludwig let go of him, still looking worried.

'I'd guess Gilbert told Antonio to take it to whoever he loves. It was supposed to be a gift, but since he's not allowed to use the car by himself after he snuck out, he asked Antonio to deliver it.'

'That means whoever Gilbert loves lives downtown,' Feliciano realized. 'Because it's not Elizabeta, or else he could have just walked over, and who else would it be? Ludwig, do any other girls live around here?'

'There's Emma, she's friends with Elizabeta. Lili is too young, and her brother is very protective.' Ludwig frowned. 'And Natalya, but Gilbert hates her brother, so he wouldn't love her.'

'Maybe it's Emma, but whoever it is probably lives downtown. We'll ask Francis,' Feliciano decided, resolving to also ask Francis about the magazines.

0o0o0o

I always hear about writing conferences a few cities over that I'd like to see.

:: Old, thick ceramic, heavily glazed