WARNING: This story is about to show why it is RATED M. I'm not saying you have to be 18, most of you wouldn't listen anyways. Just know it's about to get saucy.
"Nih…" a soft voice pulled him up from his slumber. "Nihlus." it said as the weight of a body moved onto his leg. He opened his eyes and looked down at Shepard. She was straddling his lap, face flushed, hair messily falling in her face in an oddly attractive way. "Nihlus…" she took his hand and pushed it down, pressing it against the warmth between her legs. It was warm and soft and, instinctually he sought out the source of that warmth, being careful of his claws, and pushed one of his thick fingers inside of her. She left out a soft moan and pressed her body against his, hands gripping his upper arms.
He wasn't sure when they both became fully naked, but he wasn't about to complain about his good fortune. He was hard, his length slick with his body's natural lubrication and pressed against her stomach. She looked down at it as he pumped his finger in and out of her, making her gasp for breath. She pressed against him and gave his mandible a lick, drawing a pleased grumble up from his chest. "Shepard…" he said as her hand circled around his length and pumped him up and down at a teasingly slow pace. "Ah fuck." he said and moved them so she was pinned to the ground, his tongue licking up and down her neck, forcing the best noises from her lips.
"Nih… please…" she begged, arching against him.
He nipped his way down to her stomach and licked his way back up; taking his time to lavished the tender spots he had created. "You don't know how much I want to." he said in a husky voice. He pulled his hand away from her sex, making her whimper, but she took her hand away from his throbbing length, allowing him to move into position.
He opened his eyes and was brought back to a harsh reality, and cold. They were still in the little shelter of rubble, the fire was out and they were out of any fuel for it, and both were still wearing their clothes. He looked down at Shepard, who was still asleep at his side. That didn't surprise him; she normally slept several hours more than he needed. It was also good because he was out and his blue shaft had somehow managed out of his pants and rested on Shepard's bare thigh. The contact of it against her skin felt good and he thought back to his dream. It was stupid and he should have known it was a dream when they could understand each other. "Hopefully you don't wake up until it decides to go back." he said and tucked it back in his pants, wiping his juices on his pants.
She snuggled up close to him as a wind blew against the tarp, allowing some of the cold into their imperfect shelter. He wrapped the blankets tighter around them and settled down to wait out the storm.
Shepard woke up a few hours later and his erection was safely back inside his body. She wormed her way out of the blankets and peeked outside of the tarp. "We'll make a break for the ship when the storm passes." he said, following her and wrapped the blanket around her again.
She accepted it and shifted closer to him for warmth muttered some thanks.
"Don't mention it," Nihlus said and pressed back against her. "I'll always keep you safe, I promise." he said and they let the tarp fall back into place and scooted back into the corner.
He grabbed them each a pack of rations and they ate in silence. She clearly had a lot on her mind and he left her to her thoughts. She was probably wondering where her friend was, he was wondering it too. They didn't find him in the base and the holding cells had been empty besides for the bomb. And with the explosion he doubted any information was available for them to get a lead on. Their next move would be to put out feelers for them and hope or the best. In the meantime they would continue to Nepmos and meet up with Liara, they still needed her to meld minds with Shepard so they could upload her language into the omni-tools.
Shepard
She sat quietly as she ate the goop they had available for food, her mind wondering to her crew. Joker clearly wasn't here, they hadn't found any sign of him and the mercs wouldn't have killed him after keeping him alive all this time. He was valuable to them, an exotic pet to be sold. And the explosion of the base was a bit extreme, probably an attempt to erase any data that could lead them to him. 'Hang on Joker, we'll find you.' she thought as she finished the packet of paste and tossed the empty tube onto the burned books.
They spent the next day and a half in that shelter, curled up to each other for warmth, and then the blizzard finally passed, allowing them a window to get to the ship. Nihlus strapped back into his armor and she wrapped herself tightly in the blankets. Without her under armor to keep her body away from the cold metal it would only make the cold affect her more. He peeked past the tarp, glanced back at her to make sure she was covered, and then slipped outside. She followed behind him, shivering against the cold even past the blankets.
The progress was slow as they waded through the thick, fresh powder. It was probably an hour before the sun would set when they made it back to the snow covered ship, and was dark by the time they managed to dig their way to the door. But once they were inside she let out a sigh of relief at the heated air, suddenly glad that Nihlus kept the ship hot. He chuckled at her and pushed her towards the bathroom. "Hot ke xin al shower." he told her and she smiled.
"Sounds amazing." she said and went into the bathroom, stripping out of her ripped clothes, and turned on the hot water.
She had meant for it to be a quick shower so Nihlus could take his turn and thaw out too, but the hot water couldn't be rushed. It worked its way through her muscles, releasing the cold all the way down to her bones. It was a long time before she even picked up her soap and actually cleaned herself, just enjoying the water too much to move. When she finally got out Nihlus was leaning against the wall by the door. "Sorry," she said and moved the towel higher to cover her naked wet form better.
He looked at her for a while as if he was contemplating something, but his face stayed emotionless, hiding whatever he was thinking, she hated when he did that. And then he moved past her and into the bathroom, the door locking behind him. "Said I was sorry." she muttered and went into her room.
Nihlus
He plotted their course and got some actual food while he was waiting for Shepard. Soon though, he ran out of time to waste and she still wasn't out, so he just leaned against the wall and waited. She emerged not long after and gave him a sheepish sorry. And then he did something completely rude and just stared at her, keeping his body ridged and forcing himself not to react to her in front of him in only a towel. In his mind, though, he was pinning her to the wall and ripping that towel off of her. 'Bad thoughts,' he kept telling himself and quickly disappeared into the shower.
"Come on Nihlus, you just need to wait out till you get to port, then you can sneak off and sleep with as many women as you want… just not the one you want…" he said as he undid his armor and stepped under the hot shower. 'Others won't ever fully satisfy the desire for her, it won't stop the fantasies.' he thought and braced himself on the wall in front of him. He was erect again, his body full of stress and tension of being stuck in such a small space with her for days, always close for warmth, half naked to allow body heat to be shared. He lost track of how many fantasies he played out in his head, how many opportunities he passed up. He was being very good about this and she was just oblivious to his efforts.
He stayed in the shower until his erection went away and then pulled on a fresh pair of pants. He left the bathroom with a towel slung on his bare shoulder. "Shepard, you hungry?" he asked and knocked on her door. He waited a bit for a response before he opened the door and found her sitting on the floor with a box, looking through its contents. It took him a bit to place the box, and he blinked in surprise. "Oh yeah, I forgot about that." he said and watched as she pulled out a flat rectangular object that looked like a small datapad. "I finally managed to convince the Council to send it, sorry I didn't give it to you sooner." The box was full of things that he had recovered from her ship, but it had been in lock up until it was determined none of it was dangerous, something the Council took their time getting around to.
He watched as she held a button on the top of it and after a second the screen came to life. She let out a little squeal and clutched the device in her hands. "What is it?" he asked and sat down next to her.
She looked up at him for a second trying to infer what he had said. He pointed to the device and she laughed, saying something in her language that didn't translate. When it was clear he was still lost she tapped the screen a few times and music started to come out from it.
"You're this happy about music?" he said with a chuckle. "Yeah, I guess I would be too if I couldn't understand anyone, it fills the silence at least." he said and watched her get up.
She grabbed his hand and pulled. "Up." she said and he stood and let her drag him into the mess hall where there was more room. She tapped the screen some more before she set the device down on the table and backed up. A new song started to play and she started dancing to it, spinning her body this way and that, moving her arms and hips to the beat. He smiled at her as she danced for him, clearly having fun with it, and she was pretty graceful.
Her eyes closed, looking as if she was in a trance, her body becoming the beat of the music. And then she did a backflip, three in a row actually, catching herself on her hand on the last one, holding it there for several beats before she dropped forward and rolled to her feet, going back to dancing, only now it was higher energy, spinning her body, switching to her hands and back again, bending in ways that no turian would ever be able to. She paused and opened her eyes, looking at him. "Nilt ji wall pilco, Nihlus." she said and dragged him to the middle of the floor and started dancing again.
He chuckled and tossed the towel on the table and started dancing with her to the song he couldn't understand. He wasn't the best dancer and she was so nimble he started out just trying not to bump into her. Then they started to fall into a rhythm, each moving with each other. One took a step back the other took a step forward, keeping the same small distance between them. And she was smiling, something he didn't get to see too much, he normally just saw her teasing smile not a real one like she was now. It made him happy that she was enjoying herself.
"Alright," he said when the song ended and another one started. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. "You keep dancing and enjoying yourself, I'm going to make us a proper meal." he said and released her.
"Okay." she said and went back to dancing, getting fancy with it again without him as her partner.
Shepard
She sighed as the door closed behind her and she let the towel fall. "I hope he isn't mad at me." she thought out loud to herself. She pulled on her clothes and looked at herself in the mirror. "Can't believe I'm already getting used to seeing myself in these blue girl clothes." she said with a sigh. "Well hopefully we can find the crew soon and get home. When we do the first thing I'm doing is getting a cheeseburger." She turned away from the mirror and left the room. "And some whiskey." she almost sang. "No more of those fancy drinks Nihlus orders me, just some straight up whiskey burning as it goes down." She walked down to the cargo bay, planning on using some of Nihlus' work out gear, but on the way she found an open box that caught her eye. Inside were some of her things. There was a picture of her with Anderson on the top and she smiled as she picked it up. That was the day that she had been promoted to Commander, Anderson had always been a good friend, like a father even. She set it back down in the box and took the whole thing up to her room.
"Maybe my razor is in here and I can get this hair off my legs." she muttered to herself as she shifted through the things. Joker's hat was in it, the picture, her switchblade, her dogtags, a bottle of Chakwas' brandy, and… She picked up the last item as Nihlus walked in.
He said something to her as she flipped her iPod over in her hands, checking to make sure it was okay. The screen was intact and there weren't any new scratches on it so she hit the power button and bit her lip as she waited for a reaction. There was a few seconds of delay, but the screen lite up and she squealed, stomping her bare feet on the ground in excitement. It still had a full battery and she was thankful she had charged it the night before the attack.
Nihlus said something else and sat down beside her. She looked up at him, trying to get context to what he had said and he pointed to the iPod. "Oh, it's my iPod." she said, but figured it wouldn't translate so she tapped the screen to bring her to her music list and scrolled for a good song. She settled on Can't Hold Us by Macklemore, one of her favorite songs. Most of her music was from the early twenty-first century, her squad mates used to tease her about it, called her old fashioned.
Nihlus gave a chuckle beside her and said something. She smiled and stood up, grabbing his hand and tugging on it. "Get up." she said and he stood, letting her drag him into the mess hall. She turned the volume up and set it down on the table before she backed up into the clear space so she could have room. "Alright, now don't be too judgmental, I haven't danced in a while." she said and started moving her body to the song, keeping it simple at first, but soon fell into the beat. Her eyes closed and her body became steadily more fluid. She counted the beats out in her head, took a deep breath, and flipped backwards three times. On the third flip she caught herself on her hand and held it, falling forward after a few seconds and rolling to her feet. Dancing to her was like riding a bike, she didn't forget, just had to warm back into it sometimes, and now she was. Her hips swayed to the beat, hands waving to bring attention to the movements she wanted to draw people to.
She paused for a bit to catch her breath and looked at Nihlus, finding him just standing there, motionless. "Don't just be a wallflower, Nihlus." she said and dragged him into the open space with her.
He chuckled and tossed the towel on the table and they started dancing together. He almost stepped on her foot a few times, only dodging his feet by her good reflexes. She put her hands on his hips to guide him and he fell into the rhythm with her. She removed his hand and guided them through the rest of the song, keeping a small distance between them. She was so close she could feel the heat coming off his body and it made her heart beat fast.
The song ended and she hoped that the blush in her cheeks was easily passible as overheating from the dancing. He grabbed her and held her close and said something to her, his breath washing over her face. The only word that translated was "food" and that was enough for her to understand. "Okay," she confirmed that she understood. He let her go and walked to the kitchen and she went back to dancing.
Nihlus
On their way to port they received a transmission from Liara T'Soni and it wasn't really good news. He had sent a message her way a while ago in case she was able to get it, telling her that he needed her help with some Spectre business. She had sent them a video message back saying that Nempos was becoming more and more unstable so she wasn't sure how long she was going to be able to stay there. She also told them that after her research was concluded she was going to be drafted into a classified asari project and wouldn't be able to be in contact with anyone for several months.
He grumbled as he plotted for a course direction to Nempos, rather than the port they had been going to. That meant eating into their rations and that he wasn't going to be able to release this tension until after they met with Liara. Shepard was going stir crazy too; she was constantly pacing about the ship for the past day and a half. Currently she was behind his chair, marching back and forth across the cockpit. "Shepard, go away or sit down." he growled at her, pausing her to pause for a moment, but then she continued. He growled loud enough that she heard it and she froze again. He turned around and grabbed her by the front of her shirt and pulled her into the chair with him. "Sit and be still." he told her, one arm wrapping around her waist. She looked up at him and punched him in the arm, only hurting herself against his armor. "Smart." he said sarcastically and continued fine tuning his drive engines. "We'll be there in a few hours, just calm down and relax, hell knows at least one of us should." he muttered the last part.
He tried to breathe through his mouth as much as possible, trying not to take in her scent. She smelled really good to him, especially right after a shower when she only smelled of herself and little other influence. He shifted slightly and tried to think of something else, silently wishing that they had had a chance to stop at a port. He was going stir-crazy from being stuck in that blizzard and now his ship for so long, he was stressed because of the time restraints, he was stressed because of the challenges he knew they would face on Nempos, and all of that made him crave one form of stress release. To top it off the other half needed for the act was sitting in his lap, his hand resting on her waist to keep her from getting up and starting to pace again. "You're lucky your species apparently has no sex drive." he muttered and sat back to wait out the remainder of the trip.
It seemed to take twice as long as it should have for his ship to signal them they were fifteen minutes out. He let Shepard go and stood up, motioning for her to follow him. "Get your armor on." he told her as they passed the door to her room and she nodded, slipping inside to do as he said. 'After this I will be able to understand her… I'll need to be more careful with what I say out loud.' he thought as he readied their weapons and tucked his into place.
Once Shepard came up beside him and tucked away her own weapon he took her to the all-terrain vehicle and pulled the tarp off of it. "Won't hold up to lava, but it should be fine so long as we're careful." he told her and they got inside as the ship touched down on the planet's thin surface. The cargo door lowered and he backed them out onto the planet. He scanned the surrounding area as his ship took back off, set to orbit the planet until he signaled it back.
Shepard
She looked around them in slight horror. They were on a red planet that was red for a very good reason, there was lava pools everywhere. "Nihlus, what the hell are we doing here?" she asked him, but he was busy talking to someone on his omni. "Seriously, this is a bad idea." she said as she watched the ship disappear into the sky. "I wanted to get out of the ship, not take a dip in lava."
Nihlus ruffled her hair and started driving, avoiding the pools of lava and traveling along thin strips of land. She sat back in the vehicle and tried not to think about the deadly melted rock on all sides. Lava was something she never had to deal with in the army, there weren't any procedures, no idea what to do if something happened. Either Nihlus knew how to escape lava and wasn't telling her or they were winging it. She had a sneaking suspicion that it was the later.
They had been driving for about twenty minutes by her guess and nothing had happened so she started to relax a bit. Maybe Nihlus did know what he was doing. And then the earthquake hit. She sat up in time to see the ground a few feet in front of them crack open. Nihlus turned the wheel hard and stopped them just at the edge. Shepard pushed back against Nihlus, getting as far away from the ledge as she could. "You're going to get us killed." she snapped at him, staring down at the thirty foot drop into nothing but lava. He pushed her off and started driving again, getting them away from the ledge just before it crumpled away. She sank down a bit, her heart racing as more tremors shook around them.
Nihlus
"Damn it, calm down." he nearly snapped at her. She was freaking out over every little shake or lava pool they came close to. "Clearly your planet isn't one made of lava." he muttered and sped up a bit to get under a falling pillar of stone. Over all it wasn't that bad to drive in, he just had to make sure to react fast. Plus the coordinates Liara gave him were only a few more minutes away; he could see the outline of the structure she had described. He looked down at Shepard, curled up on the floor and sighed. "Come here, we're fine." he said and wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into the seat beside him. "You're okay." he tried to sooth as she clung to him.
The ground gave another strong quake and the ground right under them surged up, sending them flying. The vehicle flipped several times before resting on its side. "Okay, in my defense I couldn't have prepared for that." he said and picked himself off Shepard. She let out a groan and tried to right herself. He went to help her when the ground under them shook and sank. "Oh shit," he cursed and tried to open the driver's side door, the one that was facing the sky, but it must have been damaged in the crash and wouldn't open. "If we get out of this, I'm killing the guy who gave us this thing." he said as he slammed his foot into the door.
"Nihlus." Shepard called in panic and he looked down at her and followed her eyes to the back of the vehicle. The ground had sunk down more there and lava was starting to melt its way through. He turned back to the door and kept kicking, finally getting it to crack and open.
He climbed out and turned back to Shepard inside the car. "Give me your hand." he said, holding his down, but she wasn't looking at him, she was looking at the lava creeping towards her, squishy herself against the dash to get further away from it. "Shepard." he barked and gritted his teeth. He went back inside and picked her up. "Get out." he yelled at her and threw her out the open door. She fell to safety on the other side and he started to climb back out. The lava touched his foot and melted through the metal. He let out a cry of pain and pushed himself up and out.
Shepard was sitting on the other side of the vehicle when he landed, looking completely dumbfounded. He grabbed her roughly and ran off towards the building Liara told them about. The ground shook under him, nearly making him fall a few times, as he jumped over the rough and ever changing landscape. When they passed he set Shepard down turned to her. "You nearly got us killed freezing up like that." he lectured her. "You're a soldier, you're supposed to be able to handle dangerous situation." he said, backing her up to a boulder until she was backed against her. "You could have died, Shepard." he put an arm on either side of her, his sub-harmonics growling angrily, but under that was a cooing that revealed that he had been scared, scared of losing her. "It's my job to protect you." he said much softer, pressing his forehead to hers. "I love you, Shepard… I can't lose you know that I'm so close to being able to understand you… Now that I'm so close to…" he couldn't say the rest, hell he wouldn't have said as much as he had if she had been able to understand any of it. 'It's a foolish hope, but I want a chance to have you.' he thought with a sigh and backed up. "Come on, we need to keep moving." he said and motioned for her to follow.
He heard her take a deep breath and follow after a second.
Shepard
She knew a good old fashioned chewing out when she heard one, even if she couldn't understand what he said. She froze up, she nearly got them killed, Nihlus was limping and it was her fault. Instead of apologizes she took a deep breath and followed him; her head focused and determined to step it up.
He guided them through the hazardous landscape towards a building in the distance. Who would build anything out here? Who would want to be out here? The idea was crazy to her as she took a running start and jumped across a crack in the ground, landing in Nihlus' arms. He backed them away from the ledge before he set her down and she inwardly winced at his carefulness, she must have really scared him when she froze up.
"Nihlus, I don't know how much longer I can keep this up." she said as night started to fall around them. They had been on the move for hours, running, jumping, climbing, and she was tired.
He turned back to her and looked over bent over form, her hands on her knees to help her catch her breath. Without a word he went to her and knelt down with his back to her. She nodded and stumbled onto his back. Once she was in place he stood up, hands clasped around her thighs to help her stay on, not that it was needed much with his hips jutting out like that. 'That would come in handy.' she thought with a slight blush and banished the thought from her head.
Nihlus
It was dark when they finally made it to the building, the world around them only lit by the lava pools that scattered the land. He set Shepard down and knocked on the door. It wasn't actually a building, it was a portable lab dropped off by a ship no doubt. While he inspected it the door opened and an asari he figured was Liara stood in front of them.
"It took you a lot longer than I thought it would, I was starting to worry." she said and he gave a small nod of his head.
"Our vehicle flipped into lava on the way here, we had to walk the rest of the way." he explained and walked inside. "Shepard," he called her over from where she was looking at some artifacts Liara had laying nearby. She turned and looked at him at her name and headed inside too.
"I take it this is why you have sought me out." Liara asked looking at the strange creature Nihlus had brought with him.
"Yes," Nihlus said and they three of them took a seat in Liara's small living area. "Her name is Shepard, she is a new species I found a few months ago." he told her. "It was my hope that you would meld minds with her and help me get her language upgraded into the omni-tools."
Liara looked at Shepard, who just sat there looking between them. She knew they were talking about her, but she didn't have any idea what about. He felt kind of guilty for having this done without her consent, it was the equivalent of mating to asari, but it had to be done so they could understand her.
"This is a long way to come for something like this, any asari could do it." Liara said and Nihlus sighed.
"No other one will, after all she is a new species that no one knows anything about, it scares most from doing it." Nihlus said and leaned forward a bit, resting his elbows on his knees.
"And you waited till you got here to tell me what it was about in case I said no." Liara said and Nihlus nodded. "We are out here without any witnesses where you can convince me in any form you like and as a Spectre no one will challenge your reasons."
"True," Nihlus said and looked at Shepard. "But that is not my reasoning for waiting. She is an amazing creature, Liara; I wanted you to have a chance of meeting her before you said no."
Liara smiled softly. "She clearly has won you over." she said, able to pick up on some of his sub-harmonics.
"Yes, but let's leave that bit out of her mind." he coughed and his mandibles twitched in embarrassment.
"I'll do it." Liara said and stood up. "But it will take me awhile to get a program of her language to upgrade the omni-tools with."
She walked over to Shepard, who leaned back a bit at her closeness, looking at Nihlus for reassurance. He nodded and she didn't get up, but she was still tense. Liara took a deep breath and closed her eyes. When she opened them again they were black, making Shepard jump. Shepard's eyes darted back and forth, as if seeing something in front of her that wasn't there. Her breathing quickened and she was biting her lip, a tear falling from the corner of her eye. It made Nihlus feel awful. He could gather that with Liara rummaging around in her memories it brought up some less than pleasant memories to Shepard's mind.
Shepard
The room around them faded and she was suddenly reliving bits of her past. First she was standing on a stage in front of a large crowd. "Congratulations, Commander." Anderson said in front of her stiff form, pinning on her new insignia, the one that would recognize her as a commander.
The memory flashed out and she was back in Afghanistan, on top of an old, ruined building, her sniper rifle in her lap. She looked out over the barren field in front of her, the remains of a battle nearly a week ago. They had won, and now the losers were coming to try and reclaim their dead. It was her job to put an end to those who tried. She set up her sniper rifle and peered down the scope, homing in on the movement below. Her finger rested lightly on the trigger as the bead came to rest between the target's eyes. She slowed her breathing, but didn't fire. It was a kid, probably only twelve years old. Strapped to his chest was a bomb, and something else was off. He wasn't looking among the battle field; he was heading in a straight line, straight towards the building they had turned into their base camp. She closed her eyes and sighed, knowing what she had to do and hating herself for it. She brought the bead back over his head and fired, landing a perfect shot into the child's spinal cord. It was clean and painless, but it didn't make the sight of the small body falling to the ground any easier.
With the threat pass she moved her sniper back to her lap and leaned her head against her fist, silently praying to whatever god was letting this continue to put an end to it.
The memory flicked to another one, she was just starting out in the military, still a thin toothpick, she wouldn't bulk up for a few more years of a proper diet and muscle building exercises. She holstered her gun and pulled off her earmuffs and smiled at her paper target. "Not bad for a rookie," one of her squad mates said. He was used to being around guns most of his life, a hunter with his father since he was just a kid. He had been giving her some pointers on getting better at shooting since the first time she had picked up a gun was after she signed up to be in the military. He died in his first week in Afghanistan; another squad mate had stepped on a landmine and had blown both of them up.
The memory flicked again and she was a teenager, angrily shoving her things into a bag. Outside her locked door her father was screaming at her. "Why can't you just be happy with what we have given you? Instead you're just throwing it all away."
"Maybe it isn't what I wanted? Maybe I never wanted it? Maybe I just wanted you to say good 'job,' or 'I'm proud of you,' or 'that's my girl.'" she yelled back and zipped up her back. "You never did any of that, you were never a dad, you're just a dictator!"
"Because you weren't doing the best you could do!" he screamed back and shook the door, trying to get.
She opened the door and slammed her fist into his face. "I always did my best, I always did everything to try and made you happy, but I'm done." she said and shoved past him and down the hall.
"You get back here, you're not leaving." he said and chased her.
She stopped at the end of the steps and turned to look at him. "Yes I am. It's my eighteen birthday gift to myself, to get out of here and away from you." she said and turning spun into her mother.
She was crying, tears making her overdone makeup run. "We only wanted what was best for you." she cried.
Shepard shouldered her bag, "No, you wanted what was best for you." she said and went out the front door.
Her father followed, still spitting mad. "If you leave, don't you ever come back." he screamed at her from the edge of his porch.
"Wasn't planning on it." she snapped back and got into her car, speeding past the front gate and down the driveway.
The memories went further back, this one she was about thirteen and sitting in her coach's office, her parents and coach discussing the latest development in her training. "I thought you said if she was training right this wasn't supposed to happen." her dad said to her coach.
"It shouldn't happen, obviously she is slacking off and pigging out." he said, his arms cross with his normal I'm-above-everyone look.
"I haven't, I've been working hard and limiting what I eat." she defended and they just looked at her like she was a stupid child. "My teacher says it's normal, that most girls actually get their period younger than I am."
"It is normal for normal people, you are an athlete." her couch scolded her. "You know the only athletes who get their period? Fat ones. You think you can do all those flips and get high enough when you're fat?" She was crying now and the couch turned back to her parents. "If you want me to keep training her she is going to have to work harder. I have a school up in New York City, if she agrees to work harder and do whatever I tell her then I think I can get her in… with a monetary incentive of course."
"Of course," her father said and pulled out his checkbook. "Money is not an issue." he added and looked to his daughter.
"I promise." she said in a small voice, trying to stop her tears.
She was pretty sure she was actually crying now, outside of the memories, she could feel them streaming down her cheeks.
The memory flickered again to her first big tournament. She stood on the second place platform with a smile on her face. She had done well, beaten out nearly a hundred other girls. The judges had said she was elegant, graceful, one of the most talented gymnasts for her age. As she stood on the platform and was awarded her second place metal she looked out into the crowd, looking for her parents. She found them and waved, but her father sat, unmoving and clearly unimpressed. She lowered her hand and her smile faded. After they let her leave the platform she went to her parents. "Daddy, look I got second." she said, holding up the metal.
"Wipe that smile off your face." he said, cold. "You came in second, you're not a winner, you're only the first loser."
That was the last memory that flickered in that she actually remembered, from there it was mainly things from her early childhood, things she didn't even know were still in her head.
And then she was back in the blue girl's small house, tears rolling down her cheeks and her shoulders shaking.
Nihlus moved beside her and wrapped his arms around her and let her cry, old wounds reopened from… whatever it was they did to her.
Nihlus
"What happened?" Nihlus asked Liara, who was sitting quietly.
"She…" Liara wiped away a few tears, sharing in Shepard's emotions during the melding of minds. "She has a lot of sad memories, I'm afraid that I may have touched on a few bad ones… I had to go back very far to find the basis of her language." She looked at the two of them. "But I can tell you that she is twenty-four, in her planet's years at least, and what I can gather that is considered an adult."
Nihlus looked at her, his mandibles twitching in embarrassment.
"You were worried about that right? If she was of a sexual age?" Liara asked, stuttering a bit as she clearly overstepped her boundaries. Damn her lack of people skills.
"Well yes… I had been wondering…" Nihlus said, regaining his composer. "That's good to know, thanks." he coughed and rubbed a hand up and down Shepard's back.
"You two can stay here for the night, it's not safe to land your ship in the dark" Liara said and moved to head to where her bed was, separated by only a curtain. "She had a very powerful will… it has worn me quite out." she added and collapsed on the bed.
Nihlus nodded a silent response, shifting himself and Shepard so they were half lying down; the most comfortable they were going to get on chairs. 'Soon I will be able to understand you, and I can help you wash those bad memories away.' he thought as Shepard silently cried herself asleep against his neck.
A/N: Yay new chapter and it didn't take nearly as long, see I am capable of producing quick and good results… sometimes. Anyways I hope you liked the really long chapter, you have Cyan to thank for that, asked her if I should continue to where I wanted to cut it off despite length or save it for the next chapter. She said make it long because she wanted more to read. And as always thank you Cyan for fixing my errors, you are amazing and I can't believe I put couch instead of coach like ten times.